S1 E20
Status
Ended
Network
CBS
SEASON
VIEW ALL EPISODE

Season 1  "Hey, I Can Pee Outside in the Dark"  1x20

Aired 20 years ago - Apr 19, 2004

Judith believes that Jake is having a hard time dealing with his parent's divorce, after he starts annoying everyone with his non-stop guitar playing. So she suggests that they send Jake to a therapist. Alan doesn't agree at first, but after thinking about it, he believes it might not be such a bad idea.

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Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 1 Episode 20 (S01E20) - 1
Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 1 Episode 20 (S01E20) - 2
It really sounds like you've got your mojo working.
Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 1 Episode 20 (S01E20) - 3
Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 1 Episode 20 (S01E20) - 4
People keep on asking me what's bothering me.
Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 1 Episode 20 (S01E20) - 5
-Problems with Mom? -No.
Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 1 Episode 20 (S01E20) - 6
Or you're the only guy in gym class without hair on his testicles.
Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 1 Episode 20 (S01E20) - 7
No, I'm just being a good host. And, yeah, a little bit.
Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 1 Episode 20 (S01E20) - 8
Did you check to see if he's constipated?
Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 1 Episode 20 (S01E20) - 9
Why, 'cause it's working so good for her?
Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 1 Episode 20 (S01E20) - 10
But this isn't like him.
Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 1 Episode 20 (S01E20) - 11
Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 1 Episode 20 (S01E20) - 12
Not bad. But why don't you try fretting the "E" and the "A" string together?
Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 1 Episode 20 (S01E20) - 13
But right now, let's just take a little pause for the cause.
Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 1 Episode 20 (S01E20) - 14
Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 1 Episode 20 (S01E20) - 15
Peer pressure. Bullies.
Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 1 Episode 20 (S01E20) - 16
Stopped her up for two weeks.
Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 1 Episode 20 (S01E20) - 17
The little snothead kicked me out of his room.
Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 1 Episode 20 (S01E20) - 18
And even while my marriage was collapsing, he always came first.
Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 1 Episode 20 (S01E20) - 19
You're right. I'm always too quick to blame myself.
Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 1 Episode 20 (S01E20) - 20
Alan, ease up. He said he's not hungry.
Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 1 Episode 20 (S01E20) - 21
Thanks.
Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 1 Episode 20 (S01E20) - 22
Stupid.
Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 1 Episode 20 (S01E20) - 23
Pick a stupid show and live with it.
Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 1 Episode 20 (S01E20) - 24
Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 1 Episode 20 (S01E20) - 25
Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 1 Episode 20 (S01E20) - 26
Perhaps you should put a Post-it Note on your penis.
Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 1 Episode 20 (S01E20) - 27
Maybe later, we could have a jam session. You on guitar, me on piano.
Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 1 Episode 20 (S01E20) - 28
I was thinking that maybe the three of us could go out and do something fun today.
Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 1 Episode 20 (S01E20) - 29
Or, we could scare it out of him.
Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 1 Episode 20 (S01E20) - 30
Real unhappiness is being totally ignored
Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 1 Episode 20 (S01E20) - 31
And FYl, I only had that surgery so you wouldn't have a grandmommy
Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 1 Episode 20 (S01E20) - 32
Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 1 Episode 20 (S01E20) - 33
But compared to our mother, you're like a fart in a hurricane.
Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 1 Episode 20 (S01E20) - 34
For the night terrors, agoraphobia, and bed-wetting.
Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 1 Episode 20 (S01E20) - 35
well, then I think you have a big problem.
Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 1 Episode 20 (S01E20) - 36
-You comfy? -It's okay.
Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 1 Episode 20 (S01E20) - 37
Well, I can barely see you from up here.
Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 1 Episode 20 (S01E20) - 38
Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 1 Episode 20 (S01E20) - 39
Neither do l.
Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 1 Episode 20 (S01E20) - 40
Yeah, it's a traumatic thing to see his father kicked out of his house.
Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 1 Episode 20 (S01E20) - 41
"He stuck in his thumb and pulled out a blank."
Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 1 Episode 20 (S01E20) - 42
Your drinking sets a bad example.
Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 1 Episode 20 (S01E20) - 43
Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 1 Episode 20 (S01E20) - 44
Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 1 Episode 20 (S01E20) - 45
Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 1 Episode 20 (S01E20) - 46
I must tell you very frankly...
Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 1 Episode 20 (S01E20) - 47
It's $175. But that's not really the point now, is it?
Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 1 Episode 20 (S01E20) - 48
Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 1 Episode 20 (S01E20) - 49
Speaking of which, did I leave that girl at the house?
Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 1 Episode 20 (S01E20) - 50
-My God, your whole family's insane. -Hold on, people!

Or scroll and see one by one:

Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 1 Episode 20 (S01E20) - 2
It really sounds like you've got your mojo working.
#2
Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 1 Episode 20 (S01E20) - 3 #3 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 1 Episode 20 (S01E20) - 4
People keep on asking me what's bothering me.
#4
Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 1 Episode 20 (S01E20) - 5
-Problems with Mom? -No.
#5
Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 1 Episode 20 (S01E20) - 6
Or you're the only guy in gym class without hair on his testicles.
#6
Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 1 Episode 20 (S01E20) - 7
No, I'm just being a good host. And, yeah, a little bit.
#7
Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 1 Episode 20 (S01E20) - 8
Did you check to see if he's constipated?
#8
Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 1 Episode 20 (S01E20) - 9
Why, 'cause it's working so good for her?
#9
Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 1 Episode 20 (S01E20) - 10
But this isn't like him.
#10
Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 1 Episode 20 (S01E20) - 11 #11 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 1 Episode 20 (S01E20) - 12
Not bad. But why don't you try fretting the "E" and the "A" string together?
#12
Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 1 Episode 20 (S01E20) - 13
But right now, let's just take a little pause for the cause.
#13
Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 1 Episode 20 (S01E20) - 14 #14 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 1 Episode 20 (S01E20) - 15
Peer pressure. Bullies.
#15
Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 1 Episode 20 (S01E20) - 16
Stopped her up for two weeks.
#16
Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 1 Episode 20 (S01E20) - 17
The little snothead kicked me out of his room.
#17
Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 1 Episode 20 (S01E20) - 18
And even while my marriage was collapsing, he always came first.
#18
Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 1 Episode 20 (S01E20) - 19
You're right. I'm always too quick to blame myself.
#19
Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 1 Episode 20 (S01E20) - 20
Alan, ease up. He said he's not hungry.
#20
Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 1 Episode 20 (S01E20) - 21
Thanks.
#21
Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 1 Episode 20 (S01E20) - 22
Stupid.
#22
Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 1 Episode 20 (S01E20) - 23
Pick a stupid show and live with it.
#23
Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 1 Episode 20 (S01E20) - 24 #24 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 1 Episode 20 (S01E20) - 25 #25 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 1 Episode 20 (S01E20) - 26
Perhaps you should put a Post-it Note on your penis.
#26
Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 1 Episode 20 (S01E20) - 27
Maybe later, we could have a jam session. You on guitar, me on piano.
#27
Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 1 Episode 20 (S01E20) - 28
I was thinking that maybe the three of us could go out and do something fun today.
#28
Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 1 Episode 20 (S01E20) - 29
Or, we could scare it out of him.
#29
Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 1 Episode 20 (S01E20) - 30
Real unhappiness is being totally ignored
#30
Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 1 Episode 20 (S01E20) - 31
And FYl, I only had that surgery so you wouldn't have a grandmommy
#31
Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 1 Episode 20 (S01E20) - 32 #32 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 1 Episode 20 (S01E20) - 33
But compared to our mother, you're like a fart in a hurricane.
#33
Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 1 Episode 20 (S01E20) - 34
For the night terrors, agoraphobia, and bed-wetting.
#34
Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 1 Episode 20 (S01E20) - 35
well, then I think you have a big problem.
#35
Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 1 Episode 20 (S01E20) - 36
-You comfy? -It's okay.
#36
Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 1 Episode 20 (S01E20) - 37
Well, I can barely see you from up here.
#37
Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 1 Episode 20 (S01E20) - 38 #38 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 1 Episode 20 (S01E20) - 39
Neither do l.
#39
Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 1 Episode 20 (S01E20) - 40
Yeah, it's a traumatic thing to see his father kicked out of his house.
#40
Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 1 Episode 20 (S01E20) - 41
"He stuck in his thumb and pulled out a blank."
#41
Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 1 Episode 20 (S01E20) - 42
Your drinking sets a bad example.
#42
Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 1 Episode 20 (S01E20) - 43 #43 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 1 Episode 20 (S01E20) - 44 #44 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 1 Episode 20 (S01E20) - 45 #45 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 1 Episode 20 (S01E20) - 46
I must tell you very frankly...
#46
Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 1 Episode 20 (S01E20) - 47
It's $175. But that's not really the point now, is it?
#47
Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 1 Episode 20 (S01E20) - 48 #48 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 1 Episode 20 (S01E20) - 49
Speaking of which, did I leave that girl at the house?
#49
Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 1 Episode 20 (S01E20) - 50
-My God, your whole family's insane. -Hold on, people!
#50