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Two and a Half Men

S1 E8
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Ended
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CBS
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Season 1  "Twenty-Five Little Pre-Pubers Without a Snootful"  1x8

Aired 20 years ago - Nov 10, 2003

Alan tricks Charlie into joining him and Judith in leading Jake and his classmates in the school's annual music show.

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Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 1 Episode 8 (S01E08) - 1
You set me up. You lured me into that classroom
 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 1 Episode 8 (S01E08) - 2
Okay, that I just lied about.
 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 1 Episode 8 (S01E08) - 3
The rest of them.
 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 1 Episode 8 (S01E08) - 4
Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 1 Episode 8 (S01E08) - 5
Judith and l will produce and direct. Together.
 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 1 Episode 8 (S01E08) - 6
with your allegedly gay ex-wife?
 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 1 Episode 8 (S01E08) - 7
A gay woman would not fake orgasms for 12 years just to protect my feelings.
 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 1 Episode 8 (S01E08) - 8
Hey, slow down.
 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 1 Episode 8 (S01E08) - 9
All this energy for me and you
 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 1 Episode 8 (S01E08) - 10
It's not. Fire me, please.
 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 1 Episode 8 (S01E08) - 11
Wear your flip-flops in the co-ed bathrooms
 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 1 Episode 8 (S01E08) - 12
See? Maybe the easiest way to do this is for us to write the actual song.
 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 1 Episode 8 (S01E08) - 13
-Like the old days. -Yeah. Except this time I'm not a virgin.
 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 1 Episode 8 (S01E08) - 14
Suck?
 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 1 Episode 8 (S01E08) - 15
Except if my Dad moves back to Mom's house,
 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 1 Episode 8 (S01E08) - 16
Gin.
 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 1 Episode 8 (S01E08) - 17
Robert Fulton, Eli Whitney
 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 1 Episode 8 (S01E08) - 18
Careful what you wish for, pal.
 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 1 Episode 8 (S01E08) - 19
But we've got a rehearsal at Jake's school.
 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 1 Episode 8 (S01E08) - 20
I'm not gonna face all those pre-pubers without a snootful.
 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 1 Episode 8 (S01E08) - 21
Really? Good news?
 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 1 Episode 8 (S01E08) - 22
Anger, grief, denial.
 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 1 Episode 8 (S01E08) - 23
But I wouldn't recommend that for an amateur.
 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 1 Episode 8 (S01E08) - 24
A woman who would do such a thing cannot be trusted.
 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 1 Episode 8 (S01E08) - 25
How could I possibly make it any worse?
 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 1 Episode 8 (S01E08) - 26
Start splitting them up early. That's your answer for everything, isn't it?
 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 1 Episode 8 (S01E08) - 27
Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 1 Episode 8 (S01E08) - 28
Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 1 Episode 8 (S01E08) - 29
Stand up.
 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 1 Episode 8 (S01E08) - 30
We've been getting along because I don't feel trapped,
 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 1 Episode 8 (S01E08) - 31
Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 1 Episode 8 (S01E08) - 32
Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 1 Episode 8 (S01E08) - 33
Lerner and Lowe are out in the hallway working things out.
 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 1 Episode 8 (S01E08) - 34
-They're fighting again, aren't they? -Yeah, what can I tell you.
 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 1 Episode 8 (S01E08) - 35
Okay, it's been fun.
 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 1 Episode 8 (S01E08) - 36
But you know what? You know what? I'm through.
 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 1 Episode 8 (S01E08) - 37
Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 1 Episode 8 (S01E08) - 38
You're not our teacher. Why should we listen to you?
 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 1 Episode 8 (S01E08) - 39
Now, listen, rehearsal's over. You can all go home.
 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 1 Episode 8 (S01E08) - 40
He's almost famous. He wrote the Maple Loops song.
 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 1 Episode 8 (S01E08) - 41
Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 1 Episode 8 (S01E08) - 42
It's the sweetest breakfast treat It's maple-licious
 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 1 Episode 8 (S01E08) - 43
From the magic chocolate mountain
 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 1 Episode 8 (S01E08) - 44
What do you know. Maybe I don't hate kids.
 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 1 Episode 8 (S01E08) - 45
I'm sorry I didn't give you a heads up about the divorce papers.
 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 1 Episode 8 (S01E08) - 46
Stick, pump or can
 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 1 Episode 8 (S01E08) - 47
Yeah, we'll take it from here, okay?
 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 1 Episode 8 (S01E08) - 48
These are my people.
 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 1 Episode 8 (S01E08) - 49
Plumber in a Jar. Let's really sell it this time.
 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 1 Episode 8 (S01E08) - 50

Or scroll and see one by one:

Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 1 Episode 8 (S01E08) - 2
Okay, that I just lied about.
#2 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 1 Episode 8 (S01E08) - 3
The rest of them.
#3 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 1 Episode 8 (S01E08) - 4 #4 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 1 Episode 8 (S01E08) - 5
Judith and l will produce and direct. Together.
#5 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 1 Episode 8 (S01E08) - 6
with your allegedly gay ex-wife?
#6 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 1 Episode 8 (S01E08) - 7
A gay woman would not fake orgasms for 12 years just to protect my feelings.
#7 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 1 Episode 8 (S01E08) - 8
Hey, slow down.
#8 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 1 Episode 8 (S01E08) - 9
All this energy for me and you
#9 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 1 Episode 8 (S01E08) - 10
It's not. Fire me, please.
#10 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 1 Episode 8 (S01E08) - 11
Wear your flip-flops in the co-ed bathrooms
#11 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 1 Episode 8 (S01E08) - 12
See? Maybe the easiest way to do this is for us to write the actual song.
#12 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 1 Episode 8 (S01E08) - 13
-Like the old days. -Yeah. Except this time I'm not a virgin.
#13 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 1 Episode 8 (S01E08) - 14
Suck?
#14 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 1 Episode 8 (S01E08) - 15
Except if my Dad moves back to Mom's house,
#15 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 1 Episode 8 (S01E08) - 16
Gin.
#16 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 1 Episode 8 (S01E08) - 17
Robert Fulton, Eli Whitney
#17 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 1 Episode 8 (S01E08) - 18
Careful what you wish for, pal.
#18 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 1 Episode 8 (S01E08) - 19
But we've got a rehearsal at Jake's school.
#19 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 1 Episode 8 (S01E08) - 20
I'm not gonna face all those pre-pubers without a snootful.
#20 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 1 Episode 8 (S01E08) - 21
Really? Good news?
#21 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 1 Episode 8 (S01E08) - 22
Anger, grief, denial.
#22 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 1 Episode 8 (S01E08) - 23
But I wouldn't recommend that for an amateur.
#23 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 1 Episode 8 (S01E08) - 24
A woman who would do such a thing cannot be trusted.
#24 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 1 Episode 8 (S01E08) - 25
How could I possibly make it any worse?
#25 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 1 Episode 8 (S01E08) - 26
Start splitting them up early. That's your answer for everything, isn't it?
#26 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 1 Episode 8 (S01E08) - 27 #27 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 1 Episode 8 (S01E08) - 28 #28 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 1 Episode 8 (S01E08) - 29
Stand up.
#29 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 1 Episode 8 (S01E08) - 30
We've been getting along because I don't feel trapped,
#30 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 1 Episode 8 (S01E08) - 31 #31 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 1 Episode 8 (S01E08) - 32 #32 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 1 Episode 8 (S01E08) - 33
Lerner and Lowe are out in the hallway working things out.
#33 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 1 Episode 8 (S01E08) - 34
-They're fighting again, aren't they? -Yeah, what can I tell you.
#34 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 1 Episode 8 (S01E08) - 35
Okay, it's been fun.
#35 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 1 Episode 8 (S01E08) - 36
But you know what? You know what? I'm through.
#36 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 1 Episode 8 (S01E08) - 37 #37 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 1 Episode 8 (S01E08) - 38
You're not our teacher. Why should we listen to you?
#38 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 1 Episode 8 (S01E08) - 39
Now, listen, rehearsal's over. You can all go home.
#39 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 1 Episode 8 (S01E08) - 40
He's almost famous. He wrote the Maple Loops song.
#40 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 1 Episode 8 (S01E08) - 41 #41 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 1 Episode 8 (S01E08) - 42
It's the sweetest breakfast treat It's maple-licious
#42 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 1 Episode 8 (S01E08) - 43
From the magic chocolate mountain
#43 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 1 Episode 8 (S01E08) - 44
What do you know. Maybe I don't hate kids.
#44 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 1 Episode 8 (S01E08) - 45
I'm sorry I didn't give you a heads up about the divorce papers.
#45 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 1 Episode 8 (S01E08) - 46
Stick, pump or can
#46 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 1 Episode 8 (S01E08) - 47
Yeah, we'll take it from here, okay?
#47 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 1 Episode 8 (S01E08) - 48
These are my people.
#48 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 1 Episode 8 (S01E08) - 49
Plumber in a Jar. Let's really sell it this time.
#49 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 1 Episode 8 (S01E08) - 50 #50