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Two and a Half Men

S7 E12
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Ended
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CBS
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Season 7  "Fart Jokes, Pie and Celeste"  7x12

Aired 14 years ago - Jan 11, 2010

Jake hopes to win back Celeste by writing her love songs. Alan and Herb hope to keep Judith from finding out they've become friends.

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Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 7 Episode 12 (S07E12) - 1
until I have a sense of where things are going.
 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 7 Episode 12 (S07E12) - 2
I mean, is it so much to ask to make a connection with another human being?
 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 7 Episode 12 (S07E12) - 3
What's taking you so long?
 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 7 Episode 12 (S07E12) - 4
So what happened? First of all, she wasn't so much perky as porky.
 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 7 Episode 12 (S07E12) - 5
Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 7 Episode 12 (S07E12) - 6
Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 7 Episode 12 (S07E12) - 7
It's really a victimless crime, don't you think?
 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 7 Episode 12 (S07E12) - 8
Heard any good jokes lately?
 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 7 Episode 12 (S07E12) - 9
Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 7 Episode 12 (S07E12) - 10
Hold on, hold on, it's that baby that trades stocks.
 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 7 Episode 12 (S07E12) - 11
that maybe, you know, after the game...
 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 7 Episode 12 (S07E12) - 12
Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 7 Episode 12 (S07E12) - 13
The kid's a stone-cold bummer, Alan.
 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 7 Episode 12 (S07E12) - 14
So we've got something in common.
 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 7 Episode 12 (S07E12) - 15
At the food court? I love that place.
 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 7 Episode 12 (S07E12) - 16
Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 7 Episode 12 (S07E12) - 17
Fart jokes, pie and Celeste.
 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 7 Episode 12 (S07E12) - 18
Trust me, you have not had dog love yet.
 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 7 Episode 12 (S07E12) - 19
who catches you in a motel room and beats you near to death
 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 7 Episode 12 (S07E12) - 20
Hey, hey, hey, nobody likes a smartass.
 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 7 Episode 12 (S07E12) - 21
Shh... kabob.
 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 7 Episode 12 (S07E12) - 22
Oh, boy.
 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 7 Episode 12 (S07E12) - 23
Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 7 Episode 12 (S07E12) - 24
Shh, shh, shh.
 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 7 Episode 12 (S07E12) - 25
Can we talk about this when I get home?
 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 7 Episode 12 (S07E12) - 26
you know, with the economy and everything,
 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 7 Episode 12 (S07E12) - 27
♪ With you I was blessed, but I failed the test ♪
 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 7 Episode 12 (S07E12) - 28
♪ Out of my chest ♪
 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 7 Episode 12 (S07E12) - 29
I want to apologize for sending you down a bad road
 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 7 Episode 12 (S07E12) - 30
Ooh, pulling out the big guns.
 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 7 Episode 12 (S07E12) - 31
Uh, no, no.
 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 7 Episode 12 (S07E12) - 32
Listen, if you really want to get Celeste back, you man up,
 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 7 Episode 12 (S07E12) - 33
Do I really say "blah, blah, blah"?
 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 7 Episode 12 (S07E12) - 34
I'd like that.
 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 7 Episode 12 (S07E12) - 35
Well, you can tell her the truth.
 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 7 Episode 12 (S07E12) - 36
Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 7 Episode 12 (S07E12) - 37
♪ Oh, Celeste, I am congested ♪
 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 7 Episode 12 (S07E12) - 38
You sang that song, didn't you?
 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 7 Episode 12 (S07E12) - 39
Then I said if she never wants to see me again, I'd understand.
 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 7 Episode 12 (S07E12) - 40
Okay, well...
 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 7 Episode 12 (S07E12) - 41
No, you're not.
 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 7 Episode 12 (S07E12) - 42
in my day, and this is not unnatural.
 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 7 Episode 12 (S07E12) - 43
Hi.
 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 7 Episode 12 (S07E12) - 44
Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 7 Episode 12 (S07E12) - 45
What do you think?
 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 7 Episode 12 (S07E12) - 46
and less cereals that help you poop.
 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 7 Episode 12 (S07E12) - 47
but I'm kind of on a Froot Loops kick now. Terrific.
 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 7 Episode 12 (S07E12) - 48
I've been with a lot of women,
 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 7 Episode 12 (S07E12) - 49
Yeah, that's what my mom says.
 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 7 Episode 12 (S07E12) - 50
(hushed): Herb!

Or scroll and see one by one:

Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 7 Episode 12 (S07E12) - 2
I mean, is it so much to ask to make a connection with another human being?
#2 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 7 Episode 12 (S07E12) - 3
What's taking you so long?
#3 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 7 Episode 12 (S07E12) - 4
So what happened? First of all, she wasn't so much perky as porky.
#4 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 7 Episode 12 (S07E12) - 5 #5 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 7 Episode 12 (S07E12) - 6 #6 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 7 Episode 12 (S07E12) - 7
It's really a victimless crime, don't you think?
#7 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 7 Episode 12 (S07E12) - 8
Heard any good jokes lately?
#8 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 7 Episode 12 (S07E12) - 9 #9 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 7 Episode 12 (S07E12) - 10
Hold on, hold on, it's that baby that trades stocks.
#10 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 7 Episode 12 (S07E12) - 11
that maybe, you know, after the game...
#11 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 7 Episode 12 (S07E12) - 12 #12 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 7 Episode 12 (S07E12) - 13
The kid's a stone-cold bummer, Alan.
#13 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 7 Episode 12 (S07E12) - 14
So we've got something in common.
#14 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 7 Episode 12 (S07E12) - 15
At the food court? I love that place.
#15 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 7 Episode 12 (S07E12) - 16 #16 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 7 Episode 12 (S07E12) - 17
Fart jokes, pie and Celeste.
#17 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 7 Episode 12 (S07E12) - 18
Trust me, you have not had dog love yet.
#18 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 7 Episode 12 (S07E12) - 19
who catches you in a motel room and beats you near to death
#19 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 7 Episode 12 (S07E12) - 20
Hey, hey, hey, nobody likes a smartass.
#20 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 7 Episode 12 (S07E12) - 21
Shh... kabob.
#21 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 7 Episode 12 (S07E12) - 22
Oh, boy.
#22 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 7 Episode 12 (S07E12) - 23 #23 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 7 Episode 12 (S07E12) - 24
Shh, shh, shh.
#24 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 7 Episode 12 (S07E12) - 25
Can we talk about this when I get home?
#25 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 7 Episode 12 (S07E12) - 26
you know, with the economy and everything,
#26 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 7 Episode 12 (S07E12) - 27
♪ With you I was blessed, but I failed the test ♪
#27 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 7 Episode 12 (S07E12) - 28
♪ Out of my chest ♪
#28 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 7 Episode 12 (S07E12) - 29
I want to apologize for sending you down a bad road
#29 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 7 Episode 12 (S07E12) - 30
Ooh, pulling out the big guns.
#30 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 7 Episode 12 (S07E12) - 31
Uh, no, no.
#31 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 7 Episode 12 (S07E12) - 32
Listen, if you really want to get Celeste back, you man up,
#32 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 7 Episode 12 (S07E12) - 33
Do I really say "blah, blah, blah"?
#33 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 7 Episode 12 (S07E12) - 34
I'd like that.
#34 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 7 Episode 12 (S07E12) - 35
Well, you can tell her the truth.
#35 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 7 Episode 12 (S07E12) - 36 #36 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 7 Episode 12 (S07E12) - 37
♪ Oh, Celeste, I am congested ♪
#37 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 7 Episode 12 (S07E12) - 38
You sang that song, didn't you?
#38 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 7 Episode 12 (S07E12) - 39
Then I said if she never wants to see me again, I'd understand.
#39 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 7 Episode 12 (S07E12) - 40
Okay, well...
#40 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 7 Episode 12 (S07E12) - 41
No, you're not.
#41 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 7 Episode 12 (S07E12) - 42
in my day, and this is not unnatural.
#42 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 7 Episode 12 (S07E12) - 43
Hi.
#43 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 7 Episode 12 (S07E12) - 44 #44 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 7 Episode 12 (S07E12) - 45
What do you think?
#45 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 7 Episode 12 (S07E12) - 46
and less cereals that help you poop.
#46 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 7 Episode 12 (S07E12) - 47
but I'm kind of on a Froot Loops kick now. Terrific.
#47 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 7 Episode 12 (S07E12) - 48
I've been with a lot of women,
#48 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 7 Episode 12 (S07E12) - 49
Yeah, that's what my mom says.
#49 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 7 Episode 12 (S07E12) - 50
(hushed): Herb!
#50