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M*A*S*H

S5 E5
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Ended
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CBS
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Season 5  "The Nurses"  5x5

Aired 48 years ago - Oct 19, 1976

When Hot Lips confines Nurse Baker to her quarters, little does she know that Baker's husband has arrived in the camp. Hawkeye and B.J. put them together in Hot Lips' tent, telling everyone that a quarantined patient has been placed there. When Hot Lips discovers what has happened, she breaks down and refuses to press charges.

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Recap of M*A*S*H Season 5 Episode 5 (S05E05) - 1
Recap of M*A*S*H Season 5 Episode 5 (S05E05) - 2
I'll wait.
 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 5 Episode 5 (S05E05) - 3
Why don't you guess, and we'll tell you if you're right.
 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 5 Episode 5 (S05E05) - 4
Recap of M*A*S*H Season 5 Episode 5 (S05E05) - 5
You're in enough trouble with that peroxide on your hair.
 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 5 Episode 5 (S05E05) - 6
Forget it, all right? All right?
 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 5 Episode 5 (S05E05) - 7
Recap of M*A*S*H Season 5 Episode 5 (S05E05) - 8
- Ooh. - Excuse me.
 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 5 Episode 5 (S05E05) - 9
- Right. I'm Tony Baker. - Uh, Corporal O'Reilly.
 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 5 Episode 5 (S05E05) - 10
- In the Swamp? - Yeah. Come on. I'll show you.
 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 5 Episode 5 (S05E05) - 11
- Right down there. - What's going on? I'm in enough trouble as it is.
 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 5 Episode 5 (S05E05) - 12
- where you were heard to say... - Oh. "When I grow up, I want to be in the Korean War."
 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 5 Episode 5 (S05E05) - 13
- Hi. Is this seat taken? - Tony. Tony, where are you?
 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 5 Episode 5 (S05E05) - 14
- I've got to be back tomorrow. - I'm due in post-op in 10 minutes.
 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 5 Episode 5 (S05E05) - 15
- compliments of the wonderful people who brought you this war. - Yea!
 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 5 Episode 5 (S05E05) - 16
- Quarantining your tent. - Quarantining my tent? What for?
 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 5 Episode 5 (S05E05) - 17
uh, if I were you, I wouldn't suck in any air, Major.
 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 5 Episode 5 (S05E05) - 18
We thought about that. But if the good father got the plague...
 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 5 Episode 5 (S05E05) - 19
Colonel Potter's gonna hear about this.
 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 5 Episode 5 (S05E05) - 20
My partner.
 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 5 Episode 5 (S05E05) - 21
Millions of people contract it by wading waist-high in the river Nile.
 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 5 Episode 5 (S05E05) - 22
Now, we-we-we can't be sure. We just have to quarantine him for a while to find out.
 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 5 Episode 5 (S05E05) - 23
No. Of course not, Colonel.
 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 5 Episode 5 (S05E05) - 24
- Oh. Richard and I had the bridal suite there. - Really?
 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 5 Episode 5 (S05E05) - 25
- Can you fit into a coffee cup? - Oh.
 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 5 Episode 5 (S05E05) - 26
Recap of M*A*S*H Season 5 Episode 5 (S05E05) - 27
- Try not to take it so hard. - I'm not. That's just it.
 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 5 Episode 5 (S05E05) - 28
Oh, uh, you children get out of here.
 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 5 Episode 5 (S05E05) - 29
Check all trays and inventory all supplies.
 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 5 Episode 5 (S05E05) - 30
- We'll rock her to sleep. - With a real rock.
 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 5 Episode 5 (S05E05) - 31
- Then how come he has a baby? - I'm playing hard to get. I'm making her suffer.
 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 5 Episode 5 (S05E05) - 32
Recap of M*A*S*H Season 5 Episode 5 (S05E05) - 33
He might like that.
 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 5 Episode 5 (S05E05) - 34
Well, what's this? Everybody in bed on time for a change?
 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 5 Episode 5 (S05E05) - 35
Recap of M*A*S*H Season 5 Episode 5 (S05E05) - 36
I was going to the latrine.
 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 5 Episode 5 (S05E05) - 37
my lavender peasant blouse is yours.
 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 5 Episode 5 (S05E05) - 38
Recap of M*A*S*H Season 5 Episode 5 (S05E05) - 39
Recap of M*A*S*H Season 5 Episode 5 (S05E05) - 40
Um, if you scrape the black off of it, it's toast under it.
 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 5 Episode 5 (S05E05) - 41
Would you tell Hawkeye and B.J. Thanks?
 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 5 Episode 5 (S05E05) - 42
Recap of M*A*S*H Season 5 Episode 5 (S05E05) - 43
Recap of M*A*S*H Season 5 Episode 5 (S05E05) - 44
- Chopper's on the pad. - Looks like a sellout.
 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 5 Episode 5 (S05E05) - 45
- We don't want to see her in any more trouble. - Then you should've stopped her.
 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 5 Episode 5 (S05E05) - 46
You're in the army, and the army means discipline.
 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 5 Episode 5 (S05E05) - 47
All right. If I had asked your permission last night, what would you have done?
 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 5 Episode 5 (S05E05) - 48
Include me in one of your little bull sessions?
 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 5 Episode 5 (S05E05) - 49
Recap of M*A*S*H Season 5 Episode 5 (S05E05) - 50
But, uh, I think he got better, because we released him.

Or scroll and see one by one:

Recap of M*A*S*H Season 5 Episode 5 (S05E05) - 2
I'll wait.
#2 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 5 Episode 5 (S05E05) - 3
Why don't you guess, and we'll tell you if you're right.
#3 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 5 Episode 5 (S05E05) - 4 #4 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 5 Episode 5 (S05E05) - 5
You're in enough trouble with that peroxide on your hair.
#5 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 5 Episode 5 (S05E05) - 6
Forget it, all right? All right?
#6 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 5 Episode 5 (S05E05) - 7 #7 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 5 Episode 5 (S05E05) - 8
- Ooh. - Excuse me.
#8 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 5 Episode 5 (S05E05) - 9
- Right. I'm Tony Baker. - Uh, Corporal O'Reilly.
#9 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 5 Episode 5 (S05E05) - 10
- In the Swamp? - Yeah. Come on. I'll show you.
#10 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 5 Episode 5 (S05E05) - 11
- Right down there. - What's going on? I'm in enough trouble as it is.
#11 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 5 Episode 5 (S05E05) - 12
- where you were heard to say... - Oh. "When I grow up, I want to be in the Korean War."
#12 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 5 Episode 5 (S05E05) - 13
- Hi. Is this seat taken? - Tony. Tony, where are you?
#13 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 5 Episode 5 (S05E05) - 14
- I've got to be back tomorrow. - I'm due in post-op in 10 minutes.
#14 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 5 Episode 5 (S05E05) - 15
- compliments of the wonderful people who brought you this war. - Yea!
#15 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 5 Episode 5 (S05E05) - 16
- Quarantining your tent. - Quarantining my tent? What for?
#16 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 5 Episode 5 (S05E05) - 17
uh, if I were you, I wouldn't suck in any air, Major.
#17 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 5 Episode 5 (S05E05) - 18
We thought about that. But if the good father got the plague...
#18 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 5 Episode 5 (S05E05) - 19
Colonel Potter's gonna hear about this.
#19 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 5 Episode 5 (S05E05) - 20
My partner.
#20 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 5 Episode 5 (S05E05) - 21
Millions of people contract it by wading waist-high in the river Nile.
#21 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 5 Episode 5 (S05E05) - 22
Now, we-we-we can't be sure. We just have to quarantine him for a while to find out.
#22 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 5 Episode 5 (S05E05) - 23
No. Of course not, Colonel.
#23 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 5 Episode 5 (S05E05) - 24
- Oh. Richard and I had the bridal suite there. - Really?
#24 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 5 Episode 5 (S05E05) - 25
- Can you fit into a coffee cup? - Oh.
#25 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 5 Episode 5 (S05E05) - 26 #26 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 5 Episode 5 (S05E05) - 27
- Try not to take it so hard. - I'm not. That's just it.
#27 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 5 Episode 5 (S05E05) - 28
Oh, uh, you children get out of here.
#28 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 5 Episode 5 (S05E05) - 29
Check all trays and inventory all supplies.
#29 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 5 Episode 5 (S05E05) - 30
- We'll rock her to sleep. - With a real rock.
#30 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 5 Episode 5 (S05E05) - 31
- Then how come he has a baby? - I'm playing hard to get. I'm making her suffer.
#31 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 5 Episode 5 (S05E05) - 32 #32 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 5 Episode 5 (S05E05) - 33
He might like that.
#33 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 5 Episode 5 (S05E05) - 34
Well, what's this? Everybody in bed on time for a change?
#34 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 5 Episode 5 (S05E05) - 35 #35 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 5 Episode 5 (S05E05) - 36
I was going to the latrine.
#36 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 5 Episode 5 (S05E05) - 37
my lavender peasant blouse is yours.
#37 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 5 Episode 5 (S05E05) - 38 #38 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 5 Episode 5 (S05E05) - 39 #39 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 5 Episode 5 (S05E05) - 40
Um, if you scrape the black off of it, it's toast under it.
#40 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 5 Episode 5 (S05E05) - 41
Would you tell Hawkeye and B.J. Thanks?
#41 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 5 Episode 5 (S05E05) - 42 #42 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 5 Episode 5 (S05E05) - 43 #43 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 5 Episode 5 (S05E05) - 44
- Chopper's on the pad. - Looks like a sellout.
#44 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 5 Episode 5 (S05E05) - 45
- We don't want to see her in any more trouble. - Then you should've stopped her.
#45 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 5 Episode 5 (S05E05) - 46
You're in the army, and the army means discipline.
#46 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 5 Episode 5 (S05E05) - 47
All right. If I had asked your permission last night, what would you have done?
#47 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 5 Episode 5 (S05E05) - 48
Include me in one of your little bull sessions?
#48 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 5 Episode 5 (S05E05) - 49 #49 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 5 Episode 5 (S05E05) - 50
But, uh, I think he got better, because we released him.
#50