Status
Ended
Network
ABC (US)
SEASON
EPISODE

Season 5

Aired 13 years ago - May 16, 2006

J.D. plans a date with Kim on their night off but Elliot keeps getting in their way. Meanwhile, Elliot throws a baby shower for Carla.Perry and Jordan hand over all of Jack's stuff to Carla. And someone announces a very surprising pregnancy.

Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 24 (S05E24) - 1
Todd, you're touching your crotch. I know. And I'm loving it.
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Best thing about a date with J.D., if you're having Chinese and want Mexican,
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# Oh, honey if I get restless
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and ended with us going to the arcade to, and I quote,
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You had to soil the food court thing. It's veal piccata night at Sbarro's.
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# I want my baby back, baby back, baby back, baby back, baby back, baby back
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Ooooh! Oh.
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relationshipruining nightmare that is the baby phase.
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You guys, this is so much fun!
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Back in 'Nam, the choppers would hover eight feet above my head, I'd jump in.
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What do you think about a romantic horseback ride on the beach?
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I didn't need luck,
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Woo! No saddles? You going to be OK riding bareback?
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No. It's a baby cage.
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Oh!
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I got it at that new maternity lingerie store at the mall.
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How do you think they're going to react to an intruder?
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In which case, you could lose a testicle. Come on. Off with the pants.
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Your right or stage right? Let me test the retraction.
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My boobs are so big right now.
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The moment where pity was turning into genuine affection. Classic Dorian.
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I didn't even eat any of that crappy shower food and I still feel nauseous.
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nay, two vasectomies, I feel, I feel I just have to ask.
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What are you talking about?
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I know. Buck up!
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Elliot Reid. Moment Killer.
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Holy crap, Dr. Cox.
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# I want my baby back, baby back, baby back, baby back, baby back, baby back
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I heard ten minutes into it, he started eating his face.
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I can imagine what Jordan and Dr. Cox are feeling right now.
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When did they start drinking straight guy drinks?
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With a sports jacket? No.
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and shut my eyes so tight and then do you.
Aired 13 years ago - May 16, 2006

J.D. challenges an urologist's assessment on a consult for a patient in need of a risky surgical procedure. He also starts to fall for her. Meanwhile, Elliot considers breaking up with Keith, but Carla is showing extreme hormonal changes due to her pregnancy and tries to interfere. The Janitor and Dr. Kelso are having a little tiff of their own about fear. MORE -LESS

Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 23 (S05E23) - 1
Dr. Feinberg?
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# I know that I'm no Superman
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All the guys liked her.
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I just love that every woman knows how to do that.
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but the penis is just another excretory organ,
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You know what? I'm not talking to any of you guys.
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What?!
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- I'll have to come by sometime. - Do it, man.
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"Rotinaj" is just "Janitor" spelled backwards, Rotinaj.
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of Dr. John D. Dorian.
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I don't mind it a turtle's wink.
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[Record scratches and music stops]
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Dr. Acula, don't stop!
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I feel like I need a stronger man in my life.
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Well, he was a roadie for Jimi Hendrix, and when it rains,
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Here's the kicker: He fled to Toronto. The freaking Mounties are involved.
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You know the difference between you and me?
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I'm wearing red. Should I not be wearing red?
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freaking out and trying to poke holes in it.
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She wears the ring at the hospital so she doesn't get hit on.
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- And then, the ultimate Cox-block. - [Cox whistles]
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When is the last time you met a cutter who didn't want to cut?
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Oh, my God, Carla! Will you please just butt out of this one?
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Mmm, I don't think that's any business of yours.
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is he's older and has heart issues, which makes him high risk.
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What can I say? You got me.
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- What'd he say? - You are square.
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What!
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I know you took my money to buy that ridiculous coat.
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Surgery's competitive. We do what we must to get ahead.
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I'd liken them to rocks, but that would insult rocks
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Hit her, Per!
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Thank God he didn't see this.
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Well done, sir.
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It's Dorian's camera. This must be a scene from Dr. Acula.
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- Blacker. - Yes, please.
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you're nothing but a spoiled, selfish, neurotic girl from Connecticut
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- Are we clear? - [JD] Nobody speaks to Carla like that.
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- Thanks for standing up for me. - Yeah, totally.
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Aired 13 years ago - May 09, 2006

J.D. feels that the same things happen over and over again at the hospital. Dr. Cox returns to work, but Elliot believes that he has lost his usual confidence. Elliot calls Dr. Cox on his behavior. Carla gets fed up with Turk, because he still can do a lot of stuff, but she can't since she is now pregnant.

Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 22 (S05E22) - 1
[J.D.] With Sasha back in the scooter shop,
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In your end-o.
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Whether it's Turk's tepid response to the baby stuff Carla makes him do...
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Or the Janitor having menace in his eyes.
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Two coins add up to 30 cents, and one of them is not a nickel.
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Look who's back, Mrs. Goldstein. It's Dr. Cox.
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in the afterlife and they could rightly have their vengeance.
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We covered Mrs. Goldstein while you were gone, but she's your patient.
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Did you guys just see that?
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I'm not wearing a party hat, sitting bare-ass on the hospital copier machine.
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But I'm going to be.
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I thought you had to have lunch with Carla.
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- I get to eat all the good food. - Echhh.
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OK, two coins, equals 30 cents, no nickels.
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I think you'll find I'm being quite literal here at work today. Ask anyone.
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What would I do without you?
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he'll have a beer, and I'll have an appletini.
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- Right, baby? - Sure.
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than the first sip of an ice cold beer after a long day.
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Incidentally, dynamite nectarini.
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romantically, professionally, personally. How do you deal with it?
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I know so.
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He wants to push thrombolytics.
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This is why the headache didn't go away.
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As you know, I can't make a decision without your help, so here goes.
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FYI, that loft is Lohan-tastic. It's vintage Lindsay.
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[Mocking] "As it is a pet peeve."
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Careful, Turkelton. First, it's no coffee.
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Know this, 90 percent of all childbirths are accompanied by an accidental dookie.
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Where did you get this? Who taught you how to use this thing?
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Hey, we solved your stupid game.
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I hate it that you two aren't getting along.
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Fine, fine, fine. I will apologize to Elliot.
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- You can't ride the bike. - Why not?
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What's it?
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Well, that's not entirely true. Since the arrival of my son,
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Well, with me, you've never been anything but an unsupportive bastard,
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All you had was a little round ligament pain. It's common.
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maybe you can ask me about it?
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And I say that knowing full well you feel the same way about me.
Aired 13 years ago - May 02, 2006

Dr. Cox starts drinking after his decisions result in the death of three of his patients. The staff tries to cover for him at the hospital, while everyone tries to convince him how inspiring he is for them. Turk starts his new rotation with orthopedic surgery, but isn't so fond of his attending doctor's touchy-feely methods. Thus, J.D. and the Janitor attempt to help Turk find ways to bond with his new supervisor. MORE -LESS

Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 21 (S05E21) - 1
Were you able to? Nurse Espinosa, I...
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You don't know what this is about. Sure, I do, donkeyboy up in ICU.
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She's not that emotionally available. I'm dead inside.
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It's really very tastefully done.
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I don't know. I kinda feel for the guy.
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Hey, guys, I'm Dr. Stone. I'm your new attending.
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No. No words yet.
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Thanks for doing this.
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I should have been able to prevent it somehow.
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Come here.
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Todd, take the scalpel and carve this into your arm.
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What would you say if you could have that big knee reconstruction?
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how much he enjoyed Sunday morning tennis.
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I'm just not into all of that sensitive touchyfeely stuff.
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What a game! A grand slam!
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Great.
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Dr. Cox, I am not going to pretend to know what you're going through,
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Know what I do when I'm having a really tough time getting through things?
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You gonna go talk to Dr. Stone? It'll blow over.
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I couldn't really worry about bailing on Dr. Cox.
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I've never heard of that.
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Apparently J.D. Told Mr. Ketay I'm throwing a birthday party.
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# Gray skies are gonna clear up
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# A happy face #
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It's short for sensitive guy.
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I think you held my hair back while I vomited.
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Practical and safe.
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No cheek kiss necessary. Oh, good. I had pipe breath.
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You could say we balance each other out pretty well.
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Why is there an intern in my bathroom?
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Ow!
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A hug takes seven seconds?
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And... blacktion.
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I have seven of my own, and each one is just as compassionate as the next one.
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Congratulations. We're separated.
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So he has a mild concussion and they're going to let him rest for a while.
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What you need is someone who will always have your back.
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You're probably wondering why I didn't show up before, huh?
Aired 13 years ago - Apr 25, 2006

J.D. asks Dr. Cox out for lunch, but runs into annoying former patient Jill Tracy, who unexpectedly teaches him something about responsibility. Elliot and Carla discover that Todd has been lying about all his hospital "conquests" and suspect that he's been less than truthful about other issues. Turk warns them not to meddle in his affairs.

Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 20 (S05E20) - 1
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# No, I know I'm no Superman
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while we could locate donors.
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but whenever I go there I end up dancing on it.
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why I should put both my feet on the floor,
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and give him the present I've been holding for him.
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Barbie, check on Mrs. Sykes's ammonia level. She's encephalopathic.
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And now it's in my head forever.
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I have the day free. My shrink couldn't make our appointment.
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Hey. What did you do last night? Turk made me watch Anaconda.
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I never slept with the Todd.
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I can live with one kidney.
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Cafeteria stinks and I can't go to the grocery store
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My brother used to brag about girls dated right before he quit baseball
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Tell them that never happened! It happened. I was there.
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Mr. Dennison isn't looking so good. He's on max inotropes and in failure.
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She was admitted a short time ago and hasn't regained consciousness.
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She was definitely depressed.
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... he's probably gay.
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Thank you.
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A little loose, but I'll get used to it.
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I'm going to give kudos in whisper form.
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I can't hear a word he's saying. Be older, Bob.
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And why are you not giddy with praise like those people?
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Then he said the words I never expected to hear.
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This is incredible. An hour ago you guys hated him.
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You'll be fine. I've done this on four mop heads. All right?
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Know what I was thinking while having lunch with Jill?
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and I am physically the closest doctor to him,
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my friend, that's a slippery slope you can't come back from.
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I'm on my way to the gym. That's what it's about.
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At first he was a little emotional, but by the end of it,
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Hey, Mickhead.
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You hang tight, all right? OK.
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She died of rabies?
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Whoa!
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I cannot believe that I let you in that fitting room while I was trying on bras.
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Nothing wrong with that either. Or that.
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We did all we could over the days to keep the patients going,
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And then Mr. Dennison.
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that I needed him earlier.
Aired 13 years ago - Apr 18, 2006

Turk and Carla turn J.D.'s old bedroom into a nursery for the baby. The Janitor seizes an opportunity to shove J.D. out of the picture for a day. Elsewhere, Elliot uses her mother to learn information about Keith's peers and Turk & Dr. Cox accuse each other of not being hip.

Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 19 (S05E19) - 1
What the...? Ah!
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Where the hell is J.D.? He's off until six.
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Oh, no, it's black Kojak and Scary NurseWife.
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Hello?
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Bro? Dude, bros don't even use "bro." You're not as hip as you think you are.
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That stands for the National Association For The Advancement Of Colored People.
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but it actually leads me back to my original point:
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I'm a bit of an inventor. I'm gonna show you my latest one:
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I don't care if he is on the first floor, I need this cleaned up now!
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Dr. Reid, would you mind explaining to me
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Fine. I'll do them tonight.
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Dr. Cox was my attending. He kept track of the times he made me cry.
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Hey, Dr. Cox, if I wasn't a black man, could I do this?
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Let's go!
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I didn't see the demon leave the body.
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What?!
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Now I've got to go meet my husband at the bus station
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Know what? The hell with it. It feels good to get a little attention.
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Seriously, Carla, I need to know who's responsible for this.
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You're feeling insecure and suspicious that I think someone on television
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You're wasting your time. You know how interns stick together.
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Meet me in the caf in half an hour.
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Now, who are you really afraid of? The fatty.
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Let's take it back before somebody sees me. As a matter of fact, get down!
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You see, Dr. Cox, what I'm gonna do is we're gonna pimp this out.
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Mr. McNair, I didn't exactly fix your computer.
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I had Csections with all my kids, so everything is as it was down there.
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When she's depressed, she hits a bag of Doritos like there's diamonds.
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You know you're my black prince. That's not it.
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Hey, what's up, dawg?
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and does embarrassing dances at cookouts.
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So? ChingLau is a dude!
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I even considered taking a year off and cleaning my way across Europe.
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Carla covered for one of my interns and then lied to my face about it.
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These kids need to stand on their... Got that right, sister.
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It's OK. It's not a big deal.
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Having a baby changes things.
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For instance, we'll still have lots of sex.
Aired 13 years ago - Apr 11, 2006

J.D.'s brother Dan returns for a surprise visit and Elliot learns that J.D. has been telling Dan that she still likes him. A patient with weight-related problems needs an MRI, but he's too big for the machine. Carla and Turk freak out when they begin to discuss baby names. Meanwhile, Dr. Kelso assigns Dr. Cox to assist Ted with malpractice claim paperwork after Dr. Cox insults Dr. Kelso's son. MORE -LESS

Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 18 (S05E18) - 1
[J.D.] And just like that, I had the chance to comfort Claire.
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# No, I know I'm no Superman
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Well, Mom does what she has to do.
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do you ever have to pinch yourself to make sure it's all not some crazy dream?
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I'm not really a big kid person. Are you guys totally freaking out?
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And if it's a boy, say hello to Fu-Kwon. What's up!
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I'm begging you to stop telling people that. No one believes you.
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they'll ruin them for us, so don't tell anyone, OK?
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If we have a girl, we're gonna name her Angie.
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Oh, sweetie, he's...
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Dan train. Whoo-whoo!
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What? I mean, it tickles.
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Hey, man, where'd your brother go, anyway?
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[Ringing]
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Promise me you'll hold me like this when I push your baby out my bajingo.
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Hey, Dan. J.D. Told me you were coming.
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My son sent me a picture of himself
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- [Both laugh] - Tell me about it.
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Hey, Mr. Brooks. Let's get these bandages off you, huh?
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He was about 46. Actually older than my parents.
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But I don't blame him for it. I blame my mom for sleeping with him.
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I can't believe they're playing with that butt hamster.
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I guess I could help you name her. Let's see.
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- The name just popped into my head! - Shut up! You just shut up right now!
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I'm developing a begrudging indifference to you.
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[Ted] Call me.
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Turk was so proud of his handiwork that he signed it.
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A girl like Elliot could never really be into somebody like you.
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Oh!
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Your back pain may involve your spinal cord,
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This next patient claims their stent was implanted incorrectly.
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It's your last name, Ted.
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I got a good feeling about those two. Well, I'm off.
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They'd be all like, "I got on her. Did you get on her?"
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Angie's dead?
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I love you too, dumpling, but I have to work late.
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- You ready to get back in there? - Yeah. Gotta vomit first.
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but sometimes when hospitals have Herbert-sized patients,
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Spare me the tough love speech.
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I hope she doesn't have my ear infections.
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When I was in high school,
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If you killed Ted, I don't wanna know. Just make sure it's not traceable.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 18 (S05E18) - 50
Aired 13 years ago - Apr 04, 2006

When J.D. rearranges his schedule to allow himself more time to spend with Turk, Turk secretly resents hanging out with J.D. in that time because it interferes with his own "Turk Time." Meanwhile, Dr. Cox and Jordan go on a double date with Elliot and Keith, and Carla covers for Kelso at work, as he grieves for his dead dog. Later, a patient almost dies, after giving up part of his liver for his brother, and the hospital staff learns about making sacrifices for the people they really care about. MORE -LESS

Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 17 (S05E17) - 1
JellO? JellO? Is this thing on? JellO?
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If you ever donated a body part to me, you know which one I'd want?
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# It's mighty, mighty just lettin' it all hang out
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# I can't do this all on my own
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We'll be back to check on you later, all right?
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You'll be my wing man, even though you're horrible at it.
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That looks like Talia.
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Party time.
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I need you to run interference for me. Keep people from seeing me vulnerable.
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And I will see you, my friend, later.
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I have three nights off during the week. Two of those, Carla has off too,
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Then I take care of all my busy work,
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I can't even talk right now.
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I have no pants on. He spilled coffee on them.
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Hear me out, you old jackass. No adlibbing.
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and now that you have let a "yes" spread out into the world,
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Can I get some new work boots? No.
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You guys, let's tally it up. Gather around.
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I forgot to wear socks.
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For God's sake, Perry walked out of the house tonight in a hockey jersey.
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Detroit Red Wings. Oh.
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Your color's back. There's no sign of infection.
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Whether it's giving up Turk Night for a friend...
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... was it worth it?
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We're cool. They invited me to this alumni thing in January.
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They're with Dr. Cox. Apparently, he's mentoring and talking to them.
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He knows my name!
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Ew!
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Just know that I'm there for you always"?
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But now I walk in on this...
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 17 (S05E17) - 39
like you were trying to say to me, "J.D., you are the new me.
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You know what? Take it.
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Dig deep. Concentrate, and just...
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I just thought about flat boobies and it made me mad.
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How about she buys rounds for everyone at the bar?
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I know. I'm in my streets because I'm sneaking out,
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Thanks to Kelso, I gotta take the staff out for drinks so they don't hate me.
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Let's do it.
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I just wanted to thank you for the other night.
Aired 14 years ago - Mar 28, 2006

Turk finds out, that Carla is pregnant, before she does, so J.D. convinces Turk to tell the entire hospital staff to surprise Carla with the news. But Carla wants to personally share her baby news with everybody, so Turk and J.D. have to quickly contain the hospital gossip. Meanwhile, when Elliot puts Dr. Cox into an embarrassing situation, he decides to get even with Elliot through Keith and Carla. MORE -LESS

Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 16 (S05E16) - 1
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By the way, next time, buy a name brand pregnancy test,
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 16 (S05E16) - 3
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# I'm no Superman #
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 16 (S05E16) - 6
When I was 19, I was a world-class 110-meter hurdler.
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You went to Harvard. You have a wife who only has a pointer and thumb pinkie.
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I didn't sleep with Amy Carter. We did everything but.
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- J.D., guess what? - Not now, Turk, I'm glow-basking.
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Red states be damned. You're gonna make great fathers.
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Allow me to paint you a picture with my imagination brush. OK?
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Where do they land? I don't know. But one thing Carla knows
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The point is you, my friend, have a chance to be on the greatest surprise
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Really? Baby.
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and they can go to a kennel and pick out another one.
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He's great, but we really don't want to separate them.
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Come here. Yes. Good boy.
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Put the hide-and-seek sensor on him. That way you'll always know where he is.
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So I'm going to address the stapler.
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[High-pitched] Oh, my God, Carla.
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That's the guy. That's the guy who broke our friend's heart.
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I don't like it, but Jordan tells her friends intimate details about me.
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Oh, Keith, mind taking a walk with me?
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I want to thank you all for turning out. Especially you, Father Rosenberg.
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Now, apparently they don't have fetus balloons. Who knew?
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I don't understand why you're so embarrassed.
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Abort the plan! Abort the surprise!
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- I spilled it. - I'll get another one.
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[J.D.] I felt Turk was starting to blame me for all this.
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I'm gonna tell her the truth and hope she's so tired from being pregnant,
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- If you say so, son. - You can't blackmail us.
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It's true you didn't know anything,
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We need her to find out on her own before anyone congratulates her. OK?
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Hello, Janitor hiding around the corner waiting to grab me.
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- You're gonna pay. - We'll see.
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Baby, that sounds like a compliment to me. Maybe you're just a little hormonal.
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This morning I was nauseous,
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- What's she yelling? - I don't know.
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He's 100 meters away and it's gonna take ten seconds to change batteries.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 16 (S05E16) - 49
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of high-end fruit my way, I could take solace in one thing...
Aired 14 years ago - Mar 21, 2006

J.D. urges Cox and his fellow doctors to do special, unconventional things for their patients, but J.D. himself is not sure he can shave his head for a woman undergoing chemotherapy, after meeting a woman who loves his hair. Meanwhile,Turk and Carla attempt to eliminate all the stress in their lives, to better their chances of conceiving. Also, Elliot can't stop giving her new boyfriend Keith stupid gifts. MORE -LESS

Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 15 (S05E15) - 1
Sorry. It's been a little while since I drove stick.
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- It's something personal. - You can confide in me.
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Uh, Carol, we got the bone marrow biopsy back and, uh...
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 15 (S05E15) - 5
In four and a half years, I've watched your pal, Stephanie,
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 15 (S05E15) - 6
Why do you think I was out Sunday buying comics for my patient?
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I had to travel to five stores to find that.
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Not important enough to warrant face time with me,
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what's wrong with Mrs. Jones? Without looking at a chart.
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Or should I say you have a person stuck around you, little guy?
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I hope you learned something today.
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Carol! Look who I found.
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Hear that, Perry?
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Attention, surgical residents still hoping to have a job next year.
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We'll probably change the name.
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- to his brother's wedding. - Ricky Morgan?
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From now on, we will only be judged by our skill and abilities. Who's with me?
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- Together! - Let's go!
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- Which do you prefer? - What's the occasion?
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[J.D.] Carol's family welcomed me as one of their own.
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Obviously, the chemo is gonna be tough, but we're all here for you.
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I hope you're proud of yourselves.
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I mean, come on. You're all in this together, right?
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[J.D.] You can't let him know you don't want to do this.
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...we're gonna shave this thing. - Yeah!
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I did. You're wearing your garage door opener on your hip.
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Actually, I am sneaking trays out of the cafeteria. I'm building a shed.
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then I dropped a quarter, which rolled over here,
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I knew there had to be something wrong! She's too perfect.
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It might accentuate my spoon-chest.
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There is. Even if she won't admit it.
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Listen, Newbie,
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The only thing you owe Carol is to treat her the best you can.
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Baby, baby, it's me! But I do love that you go to that big and black stuff.
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Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 15 (S05E15) - 42
I found the latest issue
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 15 (S05E15) - 43
No. I'm married and trying to have a baby.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 15 (S05E15) - 44
If you are trying to "Kelly Ripa" me right now, I will freak out.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 15 (S05E15) - 45
I didn't have time to get to Lost and Found, forgot all about it.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 15 (S05E15) - 46
I'm done. I'm out of a job, right? Wrong.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 15 (S05E15) - 47
Yeah, it's over, Ricky.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 15 (S05E15) - 48
Wish you put some of that crazy-nurse memory to use on our missing dude.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 15 (S05E15) - 49
It was the nicotine patch. He was trying to quit smoking.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 15 (S05E15) - 50
get it to the dry cleaners and have it back to you after five.
Aired 14 years ago - Mar 14, 2006

J.D. is sick of perfect intern Keith and he's not the only one. Elliot's relationship with Keith is revealed, so the other interns think that he is getting special attention. In the meantime Dr. Cox boasts about being named "The Best Doctor in the City" by a local magazine, thus Dr. Kelso assigns him to the most difficult patient in the hospital to deflate his ego. Also, Turk and Carla continue to struggle in their quest for conception. MORE -LESS

Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 14 (S05E14) - 1
J.D. Has a Slip 'n Slide and I want to show off my new moves.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 14 (S05E14) - 2
# I can't do this all on my own
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 14 (S05E14) - 3
Don't worry. Later, I'm gonna find some aloe
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 14 (S05E14) - 4
Sweetie, you'll get it. You'll get it.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 14 (S05E14) - 5
Can you believe those two?
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 14 (S05E14) - 6
And I know she loves sweets, so take the pill, put it in some raspberry jam,
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 14 (S05E14) - 7
- I'll try. - Hmm.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 14 (S05E14) - 8
Yes, I am. I'm gonna go ahead and give you a second
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 14 (S05E14) - 9
- Hey. - When are you coming over tonight?
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 14 (S05E14) - 10
- Yes, sir. - Terrific.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 14 (S05E14) - 11
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 14 (S05E14) - 12
Remember when I told him his backpack looked like a purse?
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 14 (S05E14) - 13
If you can't ask him to get tested, what will you do?
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 14 (S05E14) - 14
- If you and I were sleeping together? - First, the only woman in this hospital
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 14 (S05E14) - 15
- Wow. - It's just so unfair!
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 14 (S05E14) - 16
It's not weird you know that at all.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 14 (S05E14) - 17
You can count on me, Bobbo!
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 14 (S05E14) - 18
I'm thinking six-inch heels, a leather mask, fishnet stockings.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 14 (S05E14) - 19
You're in very capable nine-fingered hands.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 14 (S05E14) - 20
Honey? How could you think I wouldn't notice this on my dangle?
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 14 (S05E14) - 21
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 14 (S05E14) - 22
While I'm in the shower you can read it and get revved up.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 14 (S05E14) - 23
Perry, when I told you to treat Mrs. Cooke, I meant it.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 14 (S05E14) - 24
- Enjoy your evening, ma'am. - Thank you.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 14 (S05E14) - 25
I'm gonna hang out back here.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 14 (S05E14) - 26
[J.D.] It's a strange feeling when everyone's stuck in hell and you're not.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 14 (S05E14) - 27
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 14 (S05E14) - 28
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 14 (S05E14) - 29
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 14 (S05E14) - 30
- How did you do that? - [Door slams]
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 14 (S05E14) - 31
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 14 (S05E14) - 32
I can handle this myself.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 14 (S05E14) - 33
Hey. You get the patient with gelastic seizures.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 14 (S05E14) - 34
- Has to? - Gets to... He gets to sleep with me.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 14 (S05E14) - 35
So it worked out great for me.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 14 (S05E14) - 36
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 14 (S05E14) - 37
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 14 (S05E14) - 38
But I've been doing some thinking and... I'm scared.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 14 (S05E14) - 39
sit on your arm until it falls asleep then pull it out and use that.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 14 (S05E14) - 40
J.D., we're talking about kids, not going home to a house full of old folks.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 14 (S05E14) - 41
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 14 (S05E14) - 42
[Janitor] J.D. This is that... black surgeon that you always hang out with.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 14 (S05E14) - 43
You know, as a doctor, I rarely root for the disease,
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 14 (S05E14) - 44
Dr. Reid, we think it is lame that you give Keith preferential treatment.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 14 (S05E14) - 45
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 14 (S05E14) - 46
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 14 (S05E14) - 47
I guess I was just scared that, if I got bad news, I'd be letting you down.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 14 (S05E14) - 48
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 14 (S05E14) - 49
and break them if you want to, Bob, but I am officially O-U-T out.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 14 (S05E14) - 50
Or are you just saying that to look good?
Aired 14 years ago - Mar 07, 2006

J.D. and Dr. Cox go through the five stages of grief with their favorite patient, who is declining in health. Carla forces Turk to go on a string of double dates, including Elliot and her booty call Keith. Elsewhere, Dr. Kelso hits Ted with his car, thus Ted finally has the upper hand with a potential lawsuit.

Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 13 (S05E13) - 1
- [J.D.] We did not like him. - I think he's funny.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 13 (S05E13) - 2
I assume that you two have already entered into a conversation
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 13 (S05E13) - 3
OK, death is like a journey.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 13 (S05E13) - 4
That was the ending to Cocoon.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 13 (S05E13) - 5
Didn't you learn your lesson last week with our neighbors?
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 13 (S05E13) - 6
They're not our neighbors. They live in the woods behind our apartment.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 13 (S05E13) - 7
Oh, good, the piles are getting smaller.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 13 (S05E13) - 8
Labor until you tire and then labor some more.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 13 (S05E13) - 9
- No. - Actually, it is.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 13 (S05E13) - 10
Just once, I... [spits]
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 13 (S05E13) - 11
I understand you spend most of your time fighting death,
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 13 (S05E13) - 12
After all these years, he's finally made us a team.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 13 (S05E13) - 13
much less the relocation to Jacksonville.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 13 (S05E13) - 14
who has been yanking pants off toy soldiers and leaving them
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 13 (S05E13) - 15
entitled Help! A Large Doctor is Beating My Ass: The Lester Hedrick Story.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 13 (S05E13) - 16
you call Keith and he comes over and gives you 20-something nasty?
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 13 (S05E13) - 17
except for that one of your dad in the Navy. It helps me.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 13 (S05E13) - 18
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 13 (S05E13) - 19
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 13 (S05E13) - 20
I wasn't gonna blow this opportunity.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 13 (S05E13) - 21
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 13 (S05E13) - 22
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 13 (S05E13) - 23
I just want to tell you how beautiful you look right now.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 13 (S05E13) - 24
Wet sand plus dehumidifier equals cave-in.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 13 (S05E13) - 25
I wouldn't be able to leave the family forever if it weren't for your bike.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 13 (S05E13) - 26
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 13 (S05E13) - 27
Oh, not great. I'm cold.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 13 (S05E13) - 28
- Oh. - Elliot, if he didn't get your message,
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 13 (S05E13) - 29
Why'd you leave me, Daddy?!
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 13 (S05E13) - 30
She's in multi-organ systems dysfunction.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 13 (S05E13) - 31
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 13 (S05E13) - 32
Pretty strong there, Newbie.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 13 (S05E13) - 33
She could totally turn it around.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 13 (S05E13) - 34
God help me, I don't care if it does give me cancer,
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 13 (S05E13) - 35
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 13 (S05E13) - 36
Baby, I know you hate my cool walking stick,
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 13 (S05E13) - 37
You should sue Kelso. You have a serious tort on your hands.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 13 (S05E13) - 38
So would two floor seats
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 13 (S05E13) - 39
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 13 (S05E13) - 40
What's this, some pansy "get in touch with my feelings
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 13 (S05E13) - 41
and about as effective as fairy dust.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 13 (S05E13) - 42
Group, can you tell me what stage of grief Dr. Cox here is going through?
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 13 (S05E13) - 43
You better hope you don't make any mistakes.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 13 (S05E13) - 44
Well, you know, this isn't about you, Keith.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 13 (S05E13) - 45
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 13 (S05E13) - 46
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 13 (S05E13) - 47
Oh, hang on.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 13 (S05E13) - 48
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 13 (S05E13) - 49
but I'm so sick and tired of being a cold, emotionless bastard.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 13 (S05E13) - 50
That's not what I'll remember.
Aired 14 years ago - Feb 28, 2006

Dr. Kelso is outraged, when he discovers, that a bird has been living in Sacred Heart. He orders the Janitor to dispose of it immediately. However, the Janitor likes the bird so much, he secretly keeps it as a pet. Meanwhile, J.D., annoyed with Keith, tries to get his intern fired, but things don't turn out as intended.

Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 12 (S05E12) - 1
so I got you a DVD of the NBA's Greatest Centers of All Time
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 12 (S05E12) - 2
That's not my signature.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 12 (S05E12) - 3
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 12 (S05E12) - 4
Dr. Kelso was having his daily staring contest
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 12 (S05E12) - 5
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 12 (S05E12) - 6
That disease-infested scavenger is a serious health risk.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 12 (S05E12) - 7
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 12 (S05E12) - 8
And just like that, you have a patient in trouble.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 12 (S05E12) - 9
You can't just take a day off whenever you feel like it.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 12 (S05E12) - 10
It's like I'm at the zoo.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 12 (S05E12) - 11
Don't even worry about it. It's OK.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 12 (S05E12) - 12
In a few minutes, they'll come to get you for aortobifem bypass surgery.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 12 (S05E12) - 13
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 12 (S05E12) - 14
Touché. What else can you do?
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 12 (S05E12) - 15
- All I have are hundreds. - What are you, a prostitute?
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 12 (S05E12) - 16
I want it back by tonight or I'm gonna beat it out of you.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 12 (S05E12) - 17
I would sooner leave my medical care in the hands of Dr. Acula.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 12 (S05E12) - 18
I wrote it on-call and the next morning,
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 12 (S05E12) - 19
This morning, one of 'em had trouble with an IV.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 12 (S05E12) - 20
Please exit the area. Please exit the area.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 12 (S05E12) - 21
That's Devin. I'm Eric.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 12 (S05E12) - 22
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 12 (S05E12) - 23
I think I know how to deal with people, Carla. Check this.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 12 (S05E12) - 24
The next person who screws up is gonna be suspended for two weeks.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 12 (S05E12) - 25
Allow me to demonstrate. May I borrow your pen?
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 12 (S05E12) - 26
If someone's trying to take your new friend away, you lie.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 12 (S05E12) - 27
You said our father left us a note?
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 12 (S05E12) - 28
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 12 (S05E12) - 29
[J.D.] Sometimes, there's nothing you can do.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 12 (S05E12) - 30
I, uh... I can't believe you're finally getting out of this deathtrap.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 12 (S05E12) - 31
I know how hard it is for you to say something nice, so you can go.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 12 (S05E12) - 32
Why? You got what you wanted. You drove Keith out of here.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 12 (S05E12) - 33
And when you do, I want it buffed, shined and de-nerdified.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 12 (S05E12) - 34
- Turk, I did not lose it. You did. - I don't lose things.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 12 (S05E12) - 35
Look, somebody left a baby here.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 12 (S05E12) - 36
What?! Come on! That was intentional!
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 12 (S05E12) - 37
Mom? Dad?
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 12 (S05E12) - 38
[J.D.] And now to take care of my boy.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 12 (S05E12) - 39
Let me explain something to you.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 12 (S05E12) - 40
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 12 (S05E12) - 41
and I certainly hope the next time you fall ill, you'll remember us.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 12 (S05E12) - 42
Damn it, Sanchez. I told you Dorian's in room 136. This is...
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 12 (S05E12) - 43
Watch out for the bedpan.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 12 (S05E12) - 44
And you're done.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 12 (S05E12) - 45
Hey, Dr. D, is the IV supposed to leak like this?
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 12 (S05E12) - 46
I don't remember who made those mistakes.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 12 (S05E12) - 47
It is my wish for you that you finally find a good woman..."
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 12 (S05E12) - 48
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 12 (S05E12) - 49
Well, it's done. I had him stuffed.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 12 (S05E12) - 50
Aired 14 years ago - Feb 28, 2006

J.D. is still dealing with his recent breakup and trying not to kill intern Keith, who has become annoyingly perfect. To make matters worse, a favorite patient is in a serious coma and each of the staff finds their own way to deal with it. Dr. Cox and the Janitor bond over drinks at the bar and Carla makes it her mission to make the hospital's gym female friendly. Meanwhile Turk suggests, that J.D. and Elliot find themselves 'booty calls'. MORE -LESS

Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 11 (S05E11) - 1
- OK. - [Revving]
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 11 (S05E11) - 2
Mm-hm.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 11 (S05E11) - 3
# No, I know I'm no Superman
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 11 (S05E11) - 4
[J.D.] We were edgy because our favorite patient, Mrs. Wilk,
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 11 (S05E11) - 5
Marge, the patient should not have to be braver than you.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 11 (S05E11) - 6
No matter how long you've been here.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 11 (S05E11) - 7
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 11 (S05E11) - 8
[J.D.] Everyone has their own way of getting stuff off their mind.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 11 (S05E11) - 9
Maybe later you could show me where else you're pierced.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 11 (S05E11) - 10
Why do I forget that I'm lactose intolerant?
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 11 (S05E11) - 11
Damn it, Todd. What did I tell you about talking like that around my wife?
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 11 (S05E11) - 12
No. You should fight him.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 11 (S05E11) - 13
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 11 (S05E11) - 14
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 11 (S05E11) - 15
I tell you, I am done trying to pick up the random ladies.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 11 (S05E11) - 16
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 11 (S05E11) - 17
Also, my sister was carried off by a giant bird
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 11 (S05E11) - 18
OK? So when I clear my own stuff up, I'd love to get back together with you.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 11 (S05E11) - 19
Carla, Mike Gorski wrote "keep in touch" in my yearbook and that's all I'm doing.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 11 (S05E11) - 20
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 11 (S05E11) - 21
[Turk] Oh!
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 11 (S05E11) - 22
And when you go home, where is she?
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 11 (S05E11) - 23
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 11 (S05E11) - 24
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 11 (S05E11) - 25
Dorian drives me crazy too. But what are you going to do about it?
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 11 (S05E11) - 26
You're in need of help, but darn it, I'm not gonna give it to ya.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 11 (S05E11) - 27
Naked. Excellent.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 11 (S05E11) - 28
so we could pick out our respective booty calls.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 11 (S05E11) - 29
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 11 (S05E11) - 30
Oh, Jim!
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 11 (S05E11) - 31
There is no way in hell that Jim is getting new equipment!
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 11 (S05E11) - 32
[J.D.] I guess in the back of my mind I was hoping for a pleasant surprise
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 11 (S05E11) - 33
This is a doctor no-fly zone, bubs. Speaking of flys, yours is down.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 11 (S05E11) - 34
Yeah. Well, you know, ladies, I do what I do when I do what I do.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 11 (S05E11) - 35
when I found out Elliot had broken our no booty call agreement.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 11 (S05E11) - 36
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 11 (S05E11) - 37
Keith, Dr. Dorian and I have to get to work now, OK?
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 11 (S05E11) - 38
"El Toro Grande"?
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 11 (S05E11) - 39
I didn't say no cream. It's like having a sex puppy.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 11 (S05E11) - 40
Heel! [clicking tongue]
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 11 (S05E11) - 41
If they catch me hobnobbing with a doctor-type,
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 11 (S05E11) - 42
At the bar we can hang out all we want.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 11 (S05E11) - 43
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 11 (S05E11) - 44
Oh! Yow!
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 11 (S05E11) - 45
Anybody got a stapler?
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 11 (S05E11) - 46
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 11 (S05E11) - 47
It is 1:45.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 11 (S05E11) - 48
you smothered him to death with one of your love handles.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 11 (S05E11) - 49
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 11 (S05E11) - 50
What did she say to do if I said that?
Aired 14 years ago - Feb 07, 2006

J.D. is annoyed that Julie doesn't laugh, so Elliot encourages him to tell her his feelings, as Turk tries to use psychology to fix the issue. Meanwhile, Carla is upset when the Janitor refers to a new nurse as a "hot young Carla," which intensifies her growing concern that she is too old to conceive.

Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 10 (S05E10) - 1
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 10 (S05E10) - 2
Wow. She looks like a young Carla.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 10 (S05E10) - 3
[Screaming]
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 10 (S05E10) - 4
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 10 (S05E10) - 5
so we didn't have time for our usual seven solid minutes of lovemaking.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 10 (S05E10) - 6
- What? - Turk and I got sex gongs in Chinatown.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 10 (S05E10) - 7
Yeah, buddy! [laughs] That's my dawg!
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 10 (S05E10) - 8
J.D., she likes you. Do yourself a favor and stay out of your head for once.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 10 (S05E10) - 9
Turn the other cheek and quietly spread the rumor that she's a guy.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 10 (S05E10) - 10
- Is it? - Like Taye Diggs.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 10 (S05E10) - 11
Do I want her to meet Turk this soon? What if he doesn't like her?
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 10 (S05E10) - 12
J.D.'s parents thought he was gonna be a girl.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 10 (S05E10) - 13
Sure. I guess I can hide this in my basement for you.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 10 (S05E10) - 14
J.D. Wanted me to introduce you to my godfather.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 10 (S05E10) - 15
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 10 (S05E10) - 16
We aren't too old to hang out here. Come on.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 10 (S05E10) - 17
You guys, for real, you're my best friends.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 10 (S05E10) - 18
A representation of how alcohol affects different ages.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 10 (S05E10) - 19
Jor-da-roo! Jor-da-licious! Jor-da-roni! Ha-ha!
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 10 (S05E10) - 20
When something's funny, she never laughs.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 10 (S05E10) - 21
you wind up ruining it over some trivial reason.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 10 (S05E10) - 22
[Carla] Oh, my God, Turk. If you forget Elliot she's gonna cry.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 10 (S05E10) - 23
J.D., there's somebody else here who wants to say something.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 10 (S05E10) - 24
for this sensitive crap.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 10 (S05E10) - 25
Now who put that fake arrow through her head?
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 10 (S05E10) - 26
Nah. You're not gonna be a jerk and do something like that, are you?
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 10 (S05E10) - 27
You never laugh when something's funny. You say, "That's so funny."
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 10 (S05E10) - 28
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 10 (S05E10) - 29
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 10 (S05E10) - 30
It's not like you're trying to get pregnant and you can't.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 10 (S05E10) - 31
Who knows? Could be anything.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 10 (S05E10) - 32
[Carla] I tried, but I just couldn't get babies off my mind.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 10 (S05E10) - 33
You're disgusting.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 10 (S05E10) - 34
- You're too picky with women. - You used to be the same way.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 10 (S05E10) - 35
And for dessert you're gonna get a little Whitney...
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 10 (S05E10) - 36
- Yes. - Dr. Matthews will see you now.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 10 (S05E10) - 37
[EIliot] Ask him!
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 10 (S05E10) - 38
"that's so funny" so many times that eventually it's not gonna bother you.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 10 (S05E10) - 39
That's so funny!
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 10 (S05E10) - 40
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 10 (S05E10) - 41
- Immersion therapy didn't work. - Dude, relax.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 10 (S05E10) - 42
This is the dumbest conversation.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 10 (S05E10) - 43
"I like to keep a clean shop." And then he asked to see my insurance card.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 10 (S05E10) - 44
Take Gandhi here. Your wife is the bossiest woman I've ever met.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 10 (S05E10) - 45
is her eleventh gynecological visit this month.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 10 (S05E10) - 46
and holding hands, then eventually all that other stuff won't matter.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 10 (S05E10) - 47
If I take that fertility test
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 10 (S05E10) - 48
You'll find out eventually, so why don't you just turn around and tell him?
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 10 (S05E10) - 49
Well, let's get you that fertility test. Follow me.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 10 (S05E10) - 50
Aired 14 years ago - Feb 07, 2006

J.D. meets the klutzy Julie, and when he becomes smitten, Elliot attempts to help out with romance advice. Meanwhile, Carla tries to find Dr. Cox's soft side, when he refuses to kiss his son. Turk and the Janitor put together an air band to win a contest, but Kelso gives them a tremendous obstacle.

Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 9 (S05E09) - 1
Twenty bucks, please.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 9 (S05E09) - 2
# No, I know I'm no Superman
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 9 (S05E09) - 3
I'm sure you said something that sucked all the romance out of the moment.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 9 (S05E09) - 4
- What are you talking about? - Well, J.D. Has this...
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 9 (S05E09) - 5
Jordan, he's starting to look like a guy
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 9 (S05E09) - 6
- No more kissing! - Wh...?
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 9 (S05E09) - 7
Ladies, hate to disappoint, but my quota for women
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 9 (S05E09) - 8
so you would tell him what an amazing doctor he is.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 9 (S05E09) - 9
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 9 (S05E09) - 10
Somethin' funny?
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 9 (S05E09) - 11
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 9 (S05E09) - 12
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 9 (S05E09) - 13
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[J.D.] I convinced Julie to meet me
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 9 (S05E09) - 15
[J.D.] Oh, Mommy.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 9 (S05E09) - 16
Bye.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 9 (S05E09) - 17
But most importantly,
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 9 (S05E09) - 18
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 9 (S05E09) - 19
And stay away from my J.D. Wigs!
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 9 (S05E09) - 20
Is he gone? No. Hello?
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 9 (S05E09) - 21
I'm a doctor. And we believe that without surgery,
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 9 (S05E09) - 22
- Seriously? - Nah, while you were in the bathroom,
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 9 (S05E09) - 23
[# Five for Fighting: 100 Years]
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 9 (S05E09) - 24
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 9 (S05E09) - 25
Tell her about the hit-and-run. No, she loves ponies.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 9 (S05E09) - 26
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 9 (S05E09) - 27
Turkelton, I need you to volunteer to speak at a critical care conference.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 9 (S05E09) - 28
Oh, really? 'Cause I just got your text that said "bone city."
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 9 (S05E09) - 29
From this moment on, there will be no air-banding allowed in the hospital.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 9 (S05E09) - 30
I would say she's probably going to die.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 9 (S05E09) - 31
- [Julie shouting] - [Crashing]
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 9 (S05E09) - 32
Sometimes she needs a little help.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 9 (S05E09) - 33
No, I am talking about how you go a million miles an hour
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 9 (S05E09) - 34
Let's bring it in. Cool cats on three.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 9 (S05E09) - 35
Wait, there's a young man behind you with a quick medical question.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 9 (S05E09) - 36
He's got my back, even if I don't technically believe in him.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 9 (S05E09) - 37
[# Fountains of Wayne: Hey Julie]
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 9 (S05E09) - 38
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Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 9 (S05E09) - 41
Dr. Kelso, I'll go to that conference.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 9 (S05E09) - 42
It was never about you saying no to the conference.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 9 (S05E09) - 43
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 9 (S05E09) - 44
All right, listen up and listen good. I will kill anyone who tells Carla.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 9 (S05E09) - 45
Are we crazy to be thinking about buying this?
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 9 (S05E09) - 46
Don't do this. You're going too fast.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 9 (S05E09) - 47
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 9 (S05E09) - 48
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 9 (S05E09) - 49
I mean, honestly, Carla, with Jehovah as my witness,
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 9 (S05E09) - 50
Aired 14 years ago - Jan 24, 2006

J.D., Turk, Elliot and Carla are interrogated about the mysterious death of a patient. Dr. Kelso learns, that J.D. and Turk were away tracking down a patient, Elliot was traumatized over finding out that her make-out buddy was married and Carla was busy recruiting hospital personnel for a group lottery purchase.

Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 8 (S05E08) - 1
He said, "She's not with us."
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Whatever you say, doc.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 8 (S05E08) - 3
And one, two, three!
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 8 (S05E08) - 4
In hospitals, this happens a lot,
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 8 (S05E08) - 5
And here's the exciting news: I'm pretty sure it was one of you.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 8 (S05E08) - 6
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 8 (S05E08) - 7
You think so? Mom, not now.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 8 (S05E08) - 8
is that correct?
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 8 (S05E08) - 9
Dorian. I'm ten feet away from you. Talk.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 8 (S05E08) - 10
So, Mr. Sutton, when you came in with heartburn,
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 8 (S05E08) - 11
And here comes the gratitude, the two words every doctor lives to hear.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 8 (S05E08) - 12
He keeps a hug schedule with his friends.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 8 (S05E08) - 13
The Super Lotto jackpot was up to a hundred million dollars.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 8 (S05E08) - 14
Wait for him... wait for him...
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 8 (S05E08) - 15
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 8 (S05E08) - 16
Oh, gosh, Carla, I would. I really would.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 8 (S05E08) - 17
Ted-ski, throw ten seconds on the clock for me, would you please?
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 8 (S05E08) - 18
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[Bugle plays Reveille]
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 8 (S05E08) - 21
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Shoe shopping.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 8 (S05E08) - 23
Mrs. Wilk, I just wanted to explain to you my behavior before.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 8 (S05E08) - 24
But this is different. Sure, it could get complicated. He has a son...
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 8 (S05E08) - 25
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- You're right. - Hell, yeah, I am.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 8 (S05E08) - 27
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 8 (S05E08) - 28
Hey, guys. What's up?
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 8 (S05E08) - 29
- Look, I need a ride. - Pass.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 8 (S05E08) - 30
J. D...
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 8 (S05E08) - 31
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[J.D.] And there it was. Hope.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 8 (S05E08) - 33
This is important. You sit back down and get on with it.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 8 (S05E08) - 34
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 8 (S05E08) - 35
There goes the sentry.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 8 (S05E08) - 36
Dude, don't sweat it!
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 8 (S05E08) - 37
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 8 (S05E08) - 38
but then I stopped in Mrs. Wilk's room and...
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 8 (S05E08) - 39
OK, just get out of here and do PFTs on Mr. Foster.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 8 (S05E08) - 40
- [Beeping] - [Man] You may kiss the bride.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 8 (S05E08) - 41
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 8 (S05E08) - 42
You OK? Did you try and escape?
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 8 (S05E08) - 43
How times a day do you think I get thanked?
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 8 (S05E08) - 44
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 8 (S05E08) - 45
Nurse Espinoza, Mr. Foster's cough is getting worse and Dr. Dorian's gone.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 8 (S05E08) - 46
Oh, come on. You gotta make that shot.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 8 (S05E08) - 47
Ohh. Ahh.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 8 (S05E08) - 48
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 8 (S05E08) - 49
walk away from each other with our dignity intact. Don't you agree?
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 8 (S05E08) - 50
Dude, are you really gonna sit here all day just to thank your garbage man?
Aired 14 years ago - Jan 24, 2006

In a "Wizard of Oz" homage, J.D. is trying to go home, Turk searches for a heart donor and Carla worries, that she doesn't have the courage to become a parent. Meanwhile, Elliot doesn't believe, that she has the brains to lead a question and answer session. Also, the Janitor is painting color coded lines throughout the hospital for easier navigation. MORE -LESS

Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 7 (S05E07) - 1
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 7 (S05E07) - 2
Me neither, son. I was one of the most promising young shortstops
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 7 (S05E07) - 3
That's gonna be us someday.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 7 (S05E07) - 4
What if the second our baby's born, I start screwing things up?
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 7 (S05E07) - 5
or I drifted off and fantasized about Rudy Giuliani again.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 7 (S05E07) - 6
Come on. See, Turk? I'm great with kids.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 7 (S05E07) - 7
Damn it!
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 7 (S05E07) - 8
OK, rocktors... That's my name for doctors who rock. Next patient.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 7 (S05E07) - 9
Hate to burst your bubble, Barbie,
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 7 (S05E07) - 10
but you seem to be an expert at that. Am I right?
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 7 (S05E07) - 11
I just heard that we're doing our first ever in-house heart transplant.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 7 (S05E07) - 12
[Repeating] Bobbily, bobbily.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 7 (S05E07) - 13
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 7 (S05E07) - 14
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 7 (S05E07) - 15
[J.D.] Though I was happy for Elliot the endocrinology expert,
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 7 (S05E07) - 16
# Locking rhythm with the beat of her heart
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 7 (S05E07) - 17
# On a wire between will and what will be!
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 7 (S05E07) - 18
to type I familial hyperlipoproteinemia as demonstrated
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 7 (S05E07) - 19
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 7 (S05E07) - 20
women wear tube tops even though every ten seconds it makes them to do this:
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 7 (S05E07) - 21
- [Jack crying] - Excuse me!
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 7 (S05E07) - 22
I have got to get out of here!
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 7 (S05E07) - 23
- Oh, they're in the doctors' lounge. - Oh, my God, Laverne, I love you.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 7 (S05E07) - 24
even a doctor can succumb to one of the basest human impulses.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 7 (S05E07) - 25
We're gonna check on our son.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 7 (S05E07) - 26
Dr. Reid, our hospital lecture series is tonight and our psychologist,
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 7 (S05E07) - 27
Anyhoo, we need a speaker and Dr. Cox suggested you'd be the perfect person
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 7 (S05E07) - 28
J.D., I have to admit this to somebody: I don't like kids!
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 7 (S05E07) - 29
But I want to have a child with Turk more than anything in the world.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 7 (S05E07) - 30
Whether they're looking for brains, a heart or courage.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 7 (S05E07) - 31
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 7 (S05E07) - 32
Now, if surgery goes bad and the guy dies,
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 7 (S05E07) - 33
Try and imagine what they're going through.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 7 (S05E07) - 34
Hell, watching The View.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 7 (S05E07) - 35
Doug! Why are you hitting me?
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 7 (S05E07) - 36
with a creepy, borderline psychotic who hates everyone.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 7 (S05E07) - 37
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 7 (S05E07) - 38
Pepe?
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 7 (S05E07) - 39
I just want to apologize about earlier.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 7 (S05E07) - 40
Those topical treatments... Let's just say I wasn't completely functional.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 7 (S05E07) - 41
You're talking about my son here.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 7 (S05E07) - 42
even if you request that I don't assist.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 7 (S05E07) - 43
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 7 (S05E07) - 44
You know how people become specialists?
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 7 (S05E07) - 45
suffering from amenorrhea and hirsutism?
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 7 (S05E07) - 46
Your kid's all green and slimy.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 7 (S05E07) - 47
Anyone! Help! I'm melting!
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 7 (S05E07) - 48
I didn't dump him on the Janitor because I was busy.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 7 (S05E07) - 49
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 7 (S05E07) - 50
Aired 14 years ago - Jan 17, 2006

J.D. mistakes an elderly woman's happiness as her wish to stop treatment for a fatal illness. Turk and Elliot struggle to find the cause of a patient's body pain and Carla tries to organize the annual group photo.

Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 6 (S05E06) - 1
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 6 (S05E06) - 2
We're not clear on the ground rules.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 6 (S05E06) - 3
and smells like an obese man's two-sie.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 6 (S05E06) - 4
Guys, if I give you a patient,
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 6 (S05E06) - 5
That's how you light a fire under their butts. Some inspiration!
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 6 (S05E06) - 6
- Dr. Dorian, why do I hate all...? - They're stealing all of our jobs.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 6 (S05E06) - 7
Or we could skip the day trip to Unnecessary-land,
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 6 (S05E06) - 8
I don't even believe it! I don't believe it-lieve it-lieve it!
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 6 (S05E06) - 9
[Whimpering]
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 6 (S05E06) - 10
Turkelton.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 6 (S05E06) - 11
I'm sure you all got the flier I made reminding everyone of the staff picture.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 6 (S05E06) - 12
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 6 (S05E06) - 13
So can't we just take 10 minutes from our day to take a real staff photo?
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 6 (S05E06) - 14
They say the same thing about me.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 6 (S05E06) - 15
I've predicted a couple things:
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 6 (S05E06) - 16
# Not gonna happen! No, not gonna happen!
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 6 (S05E06) - 17
it looks a little something like this.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 6 (S05E06) - 18
and I've combined them into something even better.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 6 (S05E06) - 19
I'm sure he has lots of hobbies, Perry. The man's a drink mogul. "Dear..."
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 6 (S05E06) - 20
Wrong one died.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 6 (S05E06) - 21
it'll just give you a little more time.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 6 (S05E06) - 22
OK. Elliot turfed this chronic pain patient to me.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 6 (S05E06) - 23
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 6 (S05E06) - 24
[Shouting]
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 6 (S05E06) - 25
Where's the donut truck?
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 6 (S05E06) - 26
Ladder!
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 6 (S05E06) - 27
OK, everybody. One, two...
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 6 (S05E06) - 28
Because I wanted to make sure that you're as comfortable as possible.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 6 (S05E06) - 29
The... You know, the "dying peacefully" place.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 6 (S05E06) - 30
This is just a misunderstanding. Sorry. Tell her it's a misunderstanding.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 6 (S05E06) - 31
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So you gave her the old death sentence, did ya?
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 6 (S05E06) - 33
could lift my depression about losing my patient.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 6 (S05E06) - 34
Now, I'm going to check on Mr. Jenkins, your war hero.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 6 (S05E06) - 35
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 6 (S05E06) - 36
I don't know why you did it, but I know it was you.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 6 (S05E06) - 37
Why would you ruin this for me? I didn't even ask you to be there!
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 6 (S05E06) - 38
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 6 (S05E06) - 39
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 6 (S05E06) - 40
I'm gonna put "Dr. Acula" across the screen,
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 6 (S05E06) - 41
Frick! It's Mrs. Peele! One of us has to talk to her.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 6 (S05E06) - 42
Turk, come on!
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 6 (S05E06) - 43
Don't you think that maybe the pain could all be in his head?
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 6 (S05E06) - 44
Probably not.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 6 (S05E06) - 45
Hey, sport!
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 6 (S05E06) - 46
There's no way to answer and not get in trouble. Change the subject.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 6 (S05E06) - 47
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 6 (S05E06) - 48
If that's what you call trolling for mall ass, then yeah.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 6 (S05E06) - 49
It's not like somebody poos their pants for no reason.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 6 (S05E06) - 50
Aired 14 years ago - Jan 17, 2006

Dr. Cox's religious sister Paige comes to visit for her nephew's baptism. Turk is finding out, just how unsexy baby making can be. Elliot helps him realize that Carla finds the whole process to be romantic. Elswhere, J.D. and the Janitor start a buddy friendship.

Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 5 (S05E05) - 1
your name still would not have come up.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 5 (S05E05) - 2
I wished something'd break the tension.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 5 (S05E05) - 3
[Groans] Sex time, people!
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 5 (S05E05) - 4
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 5 (S05E05) - 5
She hit him in the face with an iron.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 5 (S05E05) - 6
and found it to be just a darn good read.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 5 (S05E05) - 7
Dr. Cox, if it makes you feel any better,
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 5 (S05E05) - 8
and pillows will keep my vagina angled so the semen pools against my cervix.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 5 (S05E05) - 9
Tyra Banks.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 5 (S05E05) - 10
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You know what's weird? He also does my brother Barry's.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 5 (S05E05) - 13
I knew you would. You're very predictable.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 5 (S05E05) - 14
We're not seeing the improvement we'd hoped for with this medication.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 5 (S05E05) - 15
in the "stop filling my patient's head with false hope" ward?
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 5 (S05E05) - 16
Hey, do you guys like improv? 'Cause I'm kind of an expert.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 5 (S05E05) - 17
"You're a cobbler whore."
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 5 (S05E05) - 18
[Groans] Damn it, I gotta go have ovulation sex again.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 5 (S05E05) - 19
I can't talk to you about sex. I don't understand that crazy gibberish you use.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 5 (S05E05) - 20
From now on, cervical mucus will be referred to as "icky sticky."
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 5 (S05E05) - 21
on the corner of Maple and Pine right across from Temple Oheb Shalom at 4pm?
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 5 (S05E05) - 22
If you happen to be keeping score, that would be medicine one, God zero.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 5 (S05E05) - 23
- I don't like that. - Nobody seems to.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 5 (S05E05) - 24
Thanks. That's one of my favorite pieces.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 5 (S05E05) - 25
Just the regular stuff.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 5 (S05E05) - 26
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 5 (S05E05) - 27
- Get in there. - Wait, baby, I'm too full.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 5 (S05E05) - 28
We were thick as two thieves in a pod.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 5 (S05E05) - 29
I figured out why I'm so great at managing relationships.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 5 (S05E05) - 30
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 5 (S05E05) - 31
to a difficult co-worker...
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 5 (S05E05) - 32
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Can you two please just try to get along?
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- Thank God for creating medicine. - [Muttering] That's it!
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So angry sex is awesome. That's no reason to go down a bad road.
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Baby, all I'm saying is, in some European countries,
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Worth it.
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Seeing as he gave me the strength to outrun the sheriff's K-9 unit,
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Honey for my honey.
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Losing a baseball scholarship because a bear ate your arm
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There will be no whining or crying while we sit here.
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- You turned me into a felon! - You know what there, Newbie?
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I don't understand why we can't have fun.
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[J.D.] Sometimes I think it takes a child to make you see the light.
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Isn't he beautiful?
Aired 14 years ago - Jan 10, 2006

J.D. is asked to introduce Dr. Kelso at an awards dinner, so he wants to find out something good about him. Dr. Kelso and Dr. Cox each have a patient, whom they feel deserves the benefit of a new experimental treatment, but there is only one open slot. Elsewhere, Carla and Turk try to help Elliot get her old job at Sacred Heart back. And the Janitor taunts J.D. with the made up game of "Jiggly Ball." MORE -LESS

Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 4 (S05E04) - 1
Around the rosie.
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You gotta want it, Johnny D!
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- [others] # I don't know but I believe - [Cox] # Newbie...
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You don't understand the predicament you're in.
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On the other hand, if you don't pucker up,
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Everyone has a human side, Coxie. Even Kelso.
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[J.D.] You know, Laverne, I'm a doctor.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 4 (S05E04) - 8
Apparently the terror alert in your armpits has been elevated to orange.
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Mark Felt, the FBI guy. That's been all over the news.
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[J.D.] If I just follow Dr. Kelso around for a while, he'll do something decent.
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Enid, I'm not cheating on you. This earring is mine.
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- Turk, have you heard of Jiggly Ball? - It's a game the orderlies made up.
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The doctor there said surgery wasn't my only option.
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- You would make a pretty girl. - Yeah.
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- Who the hell is this? - [Man] Where are my shoelaces?
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I would make him apologize personally,
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on a medication that they're hoping will reduce the size of tumors.
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Dr. Cox made me give every AC unit in this hospital a Pap smear?
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if you'll do me a favor and put my patient, Mr. Morrison,
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the sooner we can get you back home.
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So this is where germs are born.
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Elliot, nobody but me can understand you.
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[J.D.] We're so emotionally connected.
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[J.D.] How do I not know about this game?
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Can you believe Elliot's working in a free clinic?
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Priscilla, I honestly, on my mother's grave, thought your real name was Carol.
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[Sighs, then whistles]
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Why?
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So anyways, we figured if I offered to do the nursing schedules,
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 4 (S05E04) - 33
I am not giving you my last Tater Tot!
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Just a beautiful film. Beautiful.
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Ah. Two and a half years away from chest hands.
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Hey, Bob, I need to talk to you about my drug trial patient.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 4 (S05E04) - 37
For God's sake, you're three-dimensional.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 4 (S05E04) - 38
Nice! Why aren't you mocking him?
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 4 (S05E04) - 39
Maybe he wants one of them to jump in and save him.
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- Why do you have to go there? - Oh, my God!
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You hearin' that?
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What really bothers me is that you can look in there at John Morrison,
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 4 (S05E04) - 45
- Can I talk to you for a second? - No. I'm busy cleaning.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 4 (S05E04) - 46
Get off.
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- [Carla] Good. - Guys, why?
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 4 (S05E04) - 50
so if you want to talk to him about Dr. Reid, do it now.
Aired 14 years ago - Jan 10, 2006

While planning his birthday, J.D. finds a list of things he wanted to accomplish, before he turned 30. He enters a triathlon to begin. Meanwhile, Elliot discovers a side of her boyfriend Jake, that freaks her out. And Turk is working hard to impress his bosses and takes on a patient, who wants to be hypnotized during surgery in effort to be promoted. MORE -LESS

Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 3 (S05E03) - 1
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- [Turk shouts a war cry] - [Surgeons yelling]
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 3 (S05E03) - 4
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- Thirty? - No one's 30.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 3 (S05E03) - 9
so I'd like to use hypnosis instead of traditional anesthesia.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 3 (S05E03) - 10
but that ain't gonna happen.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 3 (S05E03) - 11
Knock her out, start digging around inside
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 3 (S05E03) - 12
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though his friends are playing football?
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 3 (S05E03) - 14
instead of football with his friends?" Turk ran off singing Safety Dance.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 3 (S05E03) - 15
I'm gonna cram an entire evening's worth of drinking
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 3 (S05E03) - 16
He's this guy I've been going out with,
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Elliot, maybe you should be the one to open Jake up.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 3 (S05E03) - 18
You know, before the Ioneliness burns too much?
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 3 (S05E03) - 19
Neither one of us has made headway.
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Nobba with the ladie-bb-ys!
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 3 (S05E03) - 21
Did you see the sign?
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 3 (S05E03) - 22
Hell's bells, son, when I say the name Turkelton, people laugh.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 3 (S05E03) - 23
I just want you to open up, you know, emotionally, spiritually.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 3 (S05E03) - 24
- Yeah, it's not happening. - Come on!
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You're a Mexican apple thief, I run the cider house.
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And our passion is so loud that they can hear it all the way in the distillery.
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Doug, I told you to stop pre-tagging patients.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 3 (S05E03) - 28
Swing by our parts department and pick up a pair of testes.
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If your goal is to repel all women, it's definitely working.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 3 (S05E03) - 30
You're not serious about this, are you?
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 3 (S05E03) - 31
[J.D.] The harder you push yourself to do something,
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 3 (S05E03) - 32
... or you're trying to get your boyfriend to open.
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[J.D.] And sometimes, the only thing you can do is just dive in.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 3 (S05E03) - 34
All right, ease it in. Ease it in.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 3 (S05E03) - 35
Turkelton, this is quite the event here at Sacred Fart.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 3 (S05E03) - 36
We're getting a good bit of interest from the seismologists at Caltech,
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 3 (S05E03) - 37
I can't do this. I don't believe in this hypnotism crap.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 3 (S05E03) - 38
[J.D.] As I reached the biking stage and finally realized what chafing was,
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 3 (S05E03) - 39
Dangerous topic. Talk to Carla.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 3 (S05E03) - 40
One, keep discussion superficial.
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I think the bike part's finally over. Oh, no!
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 3 (S05E03) - 42
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You're real. Although the dolphin costume's a little odd.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 3 (S05E03) - 45
- This is working. - Not for me.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 3 (S05E03) - 46
Instead of running a triathlon,
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 3 (S05E03) - 47
You're pretty smart for a guy running in bike shoes.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 3 (S05E03) - 48
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Aired 14 years ago - Jan 03, 2006

J.D. wants to show Dr. Cox and Dr. Kelso how to treat interns, but instead he finds out that they laugh at his bad jokes out of fear and respect. Everyone at the hospital is avoiding Jordan to get rid of her except for Turk. An aborted attempt to bond with her results in Jordan being conned by Sam, the drug addict. Elsewhere, Elliot's fellowship goes sour and she finds herself confiding in loose-lipped Carla. MORE -LESS

Aired 14 years ago - Jan 03, 2006

Attending at Sacred Heart, J.D. now has to deal with his own interns. Turk has doubts having children, then tries to prevent Carla from getting pregnant. Meanwhile Elliot struggles to find her way at County Hospital and doesn't want to seem like the helpless person she was before.

Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 1 (S05E01) - 1
I found him.
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- [Gurgling sound] - [Keith laughs]
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who are quite adept at this. Did you find a vein, there, Reverend Mayhem?
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 1 (S05E01) - 4
We'll loosen up some fluid around his lungs.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 1 (S05E01) - 5
until he caught... how many fish? Anybody? That's right, 22.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 1 (S05E01) - 6
Booga-booga-booga! [Laughs]
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 1 (S05E01) - 7
Dorian, after four years, I hope you are no longer following in his footsteps.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 1 (S05E01) - 8
He said "half-sincere," I think it was full-sincere.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 1 (S05E01) - 9
you would still hear the sound of my voice screaming, "Nay, oh, dear God,
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 1 (S05E01) - 10
So I went ahead and took the liberty of making you five man cards.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 1 (S05E01) - 11
Although the lettering is darling. Have you ever done calligraphy?
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 1 (S05E01) - 12
so stay here until you find a place.
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[Gasps] Dude, you left your gym shorts in here!
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 1 (S05E01) - 14
[J.D. Groans] Turk! Turk!
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 1 (S05E01) - 15
Babe, I borrowed your backpack this morning and my change fell out.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 1 (S05E01) - 16
She hasn't talked to anybody at her new hospital.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 1 (S05E01) - 17
You should be excited about meeting people over there.
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This guy's unbelievable!
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 1 (S05E01) - 19
Oh, Jason, when you're filling out a female patient's exam report,
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Hey, everybody? Great work today.
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You've worked on your Turk impression since college.
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 1 (S05E01) - 24
All this baby stuff, I feel like she rushed me into it.
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[Coughs]
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Thanks. Could you also grab a number six needle?
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That screaming patient would have to wait. I had bigger problems.
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are you people trained killers? Say something, Keith!
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[Clattering]
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of returning to the scene of the crime. And all because I, too,
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 1 (S05E01) - 34
- Thank you! - Damn it!
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which I will if you don't get out of here. Go on, get.
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No! She knows I can't eat without my strawberry milk.
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What would you have done if you couldn't give Carla the pill?
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Know what I've been doing?
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This way, he moves up to the top. Come on!
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over the last couple of years because you knew
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Thank you for giving me the opportunity to prove myself.
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Elliot had dropped by to help not talk to Turk
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because he likes to call me his "honky Adonis." And that's what friends do.
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- J.D. Can do my voice. - Hey, it's getting good!
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Now, I really don't love being den mother to you three...
Recap of Scrubs Season 5 Episode 1 (S05E01) - 47
Well, come back and see us, OK?
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because I don't think it's fair to punish a man for making small talk,
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- I guess so. - Anything else?
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- I hate this place. - It hates you, Bob.