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M*A*S*H

S11 E8
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Ended
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CBS
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Season 11  "The Moon is Not Blue"  11x8

Aired 42 years ago - Dec 13, 1982

With the camp facing prohibition, and a severe medical supply shortage, during another heat wave, Hawkeye resolves to lift morale by importing a racy new movie.

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Recap of M*A*S*H Season 11 Episode 8 (S11E08) - 1
Oh, the head dunderheads.
 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 11 Episode 8 (S11E08) - 2
- You people do good work. - Thanks, General.
 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 11 Episode 8 (S11E08) - 3
I'm not doubting it. But you do have your own speakeasy here, don't ya?
 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 11 Episode 8 (S11E08) - 4
I don't know that at all.
 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 11 Episode 8 (S11E08) - 5
Recap of M*A*S*H Season 11 Episode 8 (S11E08) - 6
Recap of M*A*S*H Season 11 Episode 8 (S11E08) - 7
Very funny. You'll be laughing at my funeral. I tell you, I'm gonna die.
 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 11 Episode 8 (S11E08) - 8
- You don't wanna get pneumonia. - Thank you.
 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 11 Episode 8 (S11E08) - 9
That's because it's also the last round.
 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 11 Episode 8 (S11E08) - 10
- What's the big deal? We'll all go to Rosie's. - [Chattering]
 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 11 Episode 8 (S11E08) - 11
is that we're able to drink and forget we're here.
 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 11 Episode 8 (S11E08) - 12
No, you won't. It's gone.
 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 11 Episode 8 (S11E08) - 13
Indeed, I did. But, alas, I had to leave when the film broke...
 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 11 Episode 8 (S11E08) - 14
"The Moon is Blue, starring David Niven, William Holden...
 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 11 Episode 8 (S11E08) - 15
when he refused to delete sexually explicit scenes and dialogue."
 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 11 Episode 8 (S11E08) - 16
Well, Bannister did everything he could, but it's no-go.
 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 11 Episode 8 (S11E08) - 17
- Coffee? - What are you, crazy?
 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 11 Episode 8 (S11E08) - 18
- You guys can't go in there. - Perfect. Can you say that again, louder?
 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 11 Episode 8 (S11E08) - 19
- What's goin' on? - We're returning your movie.
 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 11 Episode 8 (S11E08) - 20
'Cause I store film here. You gotta keep this stuff cool, babe.
 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 11 Episode 8 (S11E08) - 21
Recap of M*A*S*H Season 11 Episode 8 (S11E08) - 22
All right, all right. But you guys work the front lines.
 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 11 Episode 8 (S11E08) - 23
Will you guys beat it? You're startin' to bother me.
 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 11 Episode 8 (S11E08) - 24
nay, offended, that you would even make such an offer.
 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 11 Episode 8 (S11E08) - 25
The phony little creep won't take my calls.
 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 11 Episode 8 (S11E08) - 26
- Does this mean we're not having lunch, babe? - Out.
 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 11 Episode 8 (S11E08) - 27
- Yeah? - With a girl. Now I gotta call her.
 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 11 Episode 8 (S11E08) - 28
One of these can give you more confidence than all the deodorants ever produced.
 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 11 Episode 8 (S11E08) - 29
B-5. That's "B," as in blessed, 5.
 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 11 Episode 8 (S11E08) - 30
I even sang them a few choruses of the four-letter serenade.
 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 11 Episode 8 (S11E08) - 31
Not much I can do. It's a game of luck. Come on, B-4.
 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 11 Episode 8 (S11E08) - 32
No. No. Nevertheless, it came from my side of the pile.
 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 11 Episode 8 (S11E08) - 33
Looks to me, Major, like somewhere out there...
 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 11 Episode 8 (S11E08) - 34
Effective immediately, those are Major Winchester's beans.
 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 11 Episode 8 (S11E08) - 35
- [Crowd Murmuring] - I think we ought to take five.
 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 11 Episode 8 (S11E08) - 36
Recap of M*A*S*H Season 11 Episode 8 (S11E08) - 37
Recap of M*A*S*H Season 11 Episode 8 (S11E08) - 38
As of now, the pharmacy is closed!
 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 11 Episode 8 (S11E08) - 39
- That's why I wanted to see ya. I needed some more. - More. Look, Klinger...
 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 11 Episode 8 (S11E08) - 40
It didn't. He's just a middleman.
 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 11 Episode 8 (S11E08) - 41
Scratch away.
 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 11 Episode 8 (S11E08) - 42
- Uh, no. - No.
 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 11 Episode 8 (S11E08) - 43
[Laughs] And I'll be his first phone call.
 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 11 Episode 8 (S11E08) - 44
But to show you I'm a sweetheart, I'm gonna send ya a print of State Fair.
 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 11 Episode 8 (S11E08) - 45
Birds, bars and clusters mean nothing to this guy.
 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 11 Episode 8 (S11E08) - 46
Recap of M*A*S*H Season 11 Episode 8 (S11E08) - 47
Hey, that's great. I knew you could do it.
 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 11 Episode 8 (S11E08) - 48
They have no medicinal value whatsoever. It's all in your head.
 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 11 Episode 8 (S11E08) - 49
The ones with no medicinal value whatsoever?
 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 11 Episode 8 (S11E08) - 50
Won't they be thrilled?

Or scroll and see one by one:

Recap of M*A*S*H Season 11 Episode 8 (S11E08) - 2
- You people do good work. - Thanks, General.
#2 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 11 Episode 8 (S11E08) - 3
I'm not doubting it. But you do have your own speakeasy here, don't ya?
#3 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 11 Episode 8 (S11E08) - 4
I don't know that at all.
#4 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 11 Episode 8 (S11E08) - 5 #5 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 11 Episode 8 (S11E08) - 6 #6 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 11 Episode 8 (S11E08) - 7
Very funny. You'll be laughing at my funeral. I tell you, I'm gonna die.
#7 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 11 Episode 8 (S11E08) - 8
- You don't wanna get pneumonia. - Thank you.
#8 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 11 Episode 8 (S11E08) - 9
That's because it's also the last round.
#9 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 11 Episode 8 (S11E08) - 10
- What's the big deal? We'll all go to Rosie's. - [Chattering]
#10 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 11 Episode 8 (S11E08) - 11
is that we're able to drink and forget we're here.
#11 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 11 Episode 8 (S11E08) - 12
No, you won't. It's gone.
#12 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 11 Episode 8 (S11E08) - 13
Indeed, I did. But, alas, I had to leave when the film broke...
#13 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 11 Episode 8 (S11E08) - 14
"The Moon is Blue, starring David Niven, William Holden...
#14 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 11 Episode 8 (S11E08) - 15
when he refused to delete sexually explicit scenes and dialogue."
#15 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 11 Episode 8 (S11E08) - 16
Well, Bannister did everything he could, but it's no-go.
#16 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 11 Episode 8 (S11E08) - 17
- Coffee? - What are you, crazy?
#17 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 11 Episode 8 (S11E08) - 18
- You guys can't go in there. - Perfect. Can you say that again, louder?
#18 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 11 Episode 8 (S11E08) - 19
- What's goin' on? - We're returning your movie.
#19 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 11 Episode 8 (S11E08) - 20
'Cause I store film here. You gotta keep this stuff cool, babe.
#20 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 11 Episode 8 (S11E08) - 21 #21 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 11 Episode 8 (S11E08) - 22
All right, all right. But you guys work the front lines.
#22 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 11 Episode 8 (S11E08) - 23
Will you guys beat it? You're startin' to bother me.
#23 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 11 Episode 8 (S11E08) - 24
nay, offended, that you would even make such an offer.
#24 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 11 Episode 8 (S11E08) - 25
The phony little creep won't take my calls.
#25 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 11 Episode 8 (S11E08) - 26
- Does this mean we're not having lunch, babe? - Out.
#26 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 11 Episode 8 (S11E08) - 27
- Yeah? - With a girl. Now I gotta call her.
#27 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 11 Episode 8 (S11E08) - 28
One of these can give you more confidence than all the deodorants ever produced.
#28 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 11 Episode 8 (S11E08) - 29
B-5. That's "B," as in blessed, 5.
#29 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 11 Episode 8 (S11E08) - 30
I even sang them a few choruses of the four-letter serenade.
#30 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 11 Episode 8 (S11E08) - 31
Not much I can do. It's a game of luck. Come on, B-4.
#31 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 11 Episode 8 (S11E08) - 32
No. No. Nevertheless, it came from my side of the pile.
#32 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 11 Episode 8 (S11E08) - 33
Looks to me, Major, like somewhere out there...
#33 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 11 Episode 8 (S11E08) - 34
Effective immediately, those are Major Winchester's beans.
#34 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 11 Episode 8 (S11E08) - 35
- [Crowd Murmuring] - I think we ought to take five.
#35 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 11 Episode 8 (S11E08) - 36 #36 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 11 Episode 8 (S11E08) - 37 #37 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 11 Episode 8 (S11E08) - 38
As of now, the pharmacy is closed!
#38 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 11 Episode 8 (S11E08) - 39
- That's why I wanted to see ya. I needed some more. - More. Look, Klinger...
#39 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 11 Episode 8 (S11E08) - 40
It didn't. He's just a middleman.
#40 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 11 Episode 8 (S11E08) - 41
Scratch away.
#41 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 11 Episode 8 (S11E08) - 42
- Uh, no. - No.
#42 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 11 Episode 8 (S11E08) - 43
[Laughs] And I'll be his first phone call.
#43 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 11 Episode 8 (S11E08) - 44
But to show you I'm a sweetheart, I'm gonna send ya a print of State Fair.
#44 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 11 Episode 8 (S11E08) - 45
Birds, bars and clusters mean nothing to this guy.
#45 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 11 Episode 8 (S11E08) - 46 #46 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 11 Episode 8 (S11E08) - 47
Hey, that's great. I knew you could do it.
#47 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 11 Episode 8 (S11E08) - 48
They have no medicinal value whatsoever. It's all in your head.
#48 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 11 Episode 8 (S11E08) - 49
The ones with no medicinal value whatsoever?
#49 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 11 Episode 8 (S11E08) - 50
Won't they be thrilled?
#50