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M*A*S*H

S9 E3
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CBS
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Season 9  "Cementing Relationships"  9x3

Aired 43 years ago - Dec 01, 1980

A jilted Italian soldier, Corpsman Ignazio De Simone, is smitten by Margaret; Klinger pours a cement floor in the operating room to fight the spread of germs.

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Recap of M*A*S*H Season 9 Episode 3 (S09E03) - 1
Oh, gee, I don't know. You mean, give up gristle?
 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 9 Episode 3 (S09E03) - 2
Dress right, dress!
 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 9 Episode 3 (S09E03) - 3
Oh, of course.
 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 9 Episode 3 (S09E03) - 4
Recap of M*A*S*H Season 9 Episode 3 (S09E03) - 5
Recap of M*A*S*H Season 9 Episode 3 (S09E03) - 6
Any father of Margaret's is a father of mine.
 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 9 Episode 3 (S09E03) - 7
- No, they're just draftees, but they're top-notch surgeons. - [Dog Barking]
 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 9 Episode 3 (S09E03) - 8
- I always told you it's better to lead than to follow, didn't I? - Yes, sir.
 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 9 Episode 3 (S09E03) - 9
Oh, of course, Daddy. I understand.
 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 9 Episode 3 (S09E03) - 10
Morgove? Oh, Morgove. He was that kid with the head wound.
 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 9 Episode 3 (S09E03) - 11
- Didn't I tell you? - Would you look at that?
 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 9 Episode 3 (S09E03) - 12
Recap of M*A*S*H Season 9 Episode 3 (S09E03) - 13
[B. J.] Will you hurry? My taste buds are dancing in the street.
 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 9 Episode 3 (S09E03) - 14
Close the lid. Listen.
 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 9 Episode 3 (S09E03) - 15
Don't worry about me, Margaret. Just go on with your work.
 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 9 Episode 3 (S09E03) - 16
It's like buying gloves for the Venus de Milo.
 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 9 Episode 3 (S09E03) - 17
Recap of M*A*S*H Season 9 Episode 3 (S09E03) - 18
Recap of M*A*S*H Season 9 Episode 3 (S09E03) - 19
How are you supposed to sleep on a hard, fat, pillow? I'll get you another pillow.
 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 9 Episode 3 (S09E03) - 20
Well, there's really not a lot to tell.
 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 9 Episode 3 (S09E03) - 21
I just don't know where to start.
 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 9 Episode 3 (S09E03) - 22
Please, Margaret, I'd just rather not talk about it.
 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 9 Episode 3 (S09E03) - 23
Well, I'm sure you won't let it happen again.
 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 9 Episode 3 (S09E03) - 24
Recap of M*A*S*H Season 9 Episode 3 (S09E03) - 25
Margaret tells me you're an old cavalry man too.
 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 9 Episode 3 (S09E03) - 26
When I ship out of here...
 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 9 Episode 3 (S09E03) - 27
You figure that retirement is like a full-time R & R...
 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 9 Episode 3 (S09E03) - 28
- [Potter Continues, Indistinct] - Uh-oh.
 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 9 Episode 3 (S09E03) - 29
Well, there's been no formal declaration of war.
 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 9 Episode 3 (S09E03) - 30
Why shouldn't we be clowns? We're living in a three-ring circus.
 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 9 Episode 3 (S09E03) - 31
- Hawkeye, wake up! - I'm not asleep. I'm dead.
 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 9 Episode 3 (S09E03) - 32
- That's our beef. - We stole it fair and square.
 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 9 Episode 3 (S09E03) - 33
mm-hmm, Max, aren't we the Four Musketeers...
 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 9 Episode 3 (S09E03) - 34
Pierce, if this is another practical joke, and there is no side of beef...
 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 9 Episode 3 (S09E03) - 35
After your little shenanigans last night, my father is packing to leave right now.
 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 9 Episode 3 (S09E03) - 36
You both are nothing but a pair of juvenile delinquents.
 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 9 Episode 3 (S09E03) - 37
- That's meat. - Just following doctors' orders.
 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 9 Episode 3 (S09E03) - 38
Well, he said that something came up, but I know what really happened.
 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 9 Episode 3 (S09E03) - 39
Now just listen, Margaret. Would I be telling you this if it wasn't true?
 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 9 Episode 3 (S09E03) - 40
And then the foul-up in O.R.
 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 9 Episode 3 (S09E03) - 41
[Knocking]
 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 9 Episode 3 (S09E03) - 42
Is that so? Well, you sure got a funny way of showing it.
 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 9 Episode 3 (S09E03) - 43
- That should say it all. - It doesn't say enough...
 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 9 Episode 3 (S09E03) - 44
Recap of M*A*S*H Season 9 Episode 3 (S09E03) - 45
You'd rather crush her feelings than let on you're human like the rest of us?
 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 9 Episode 3 (S09E03) - 46
who would have acted the way you did the other night...
 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 9 Episode 3 (S09E03) - 47
Recap of M*A*S*H Season 9 Episode 3 (S09E03) - 48
Oh, my, seems like quite a little wait for the showers.
 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 9 Episode 3 (S09E03) - 49
Oh, Dad, I wish you didn't have to go now.
 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 9 Episode 3 (S09E03) - 50

Or scroll and see one by one:

Recap of M*A*S*H Season 9 Episode 3 (S09E03) - 2
Dress right, dress!
#2 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 9 Episode 3 (S09E03) - 3
Oh, of course.
#3 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 9 Episode 3 (S09E03) - 4 #4 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 9 Episode 3 (S09E03) - 5 #5 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 9 Episode 3 (S09E03) - 6
Any father of Margaret's is a father of mine.
#6 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 9 Episode 3 (S09E03) - 7
- No, they're just draftees, but they're top-notch surgeons. - [Dog Barking]
#7 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 9 Episode 3 (S09E03) - 8
- I always told you it's better to lead than to follow, didn't I? - Yes, sir.
#8 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 9 Episode 3 (S09E03) - 9
Oh, of course, Daddy. I understand.
#9 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 9 Episode 3 (S09E03) - 10
Morgove? Oh, Morgove. He was that kid with the head wound.
#10 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 9 Episode 3 (S09E03) - 11
- Didn't I tell you? - Would you look at that?
#11 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 9 Episode 3 (S09E03) - 12 #12 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 9 Episode 3 (S09E03) - 13
[B. J.] Will you hurry? My taste buds are dancing in the street.
#13 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 9 Episode 3 (S09E03) - 14
Close the lid. Listen.
#14 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 9 Episode 3 (S09E03) - 15
Don't worry about me, Margaret. Just go on with your work.
#15 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 9 Episode 3 (S09E03) - 16
It's like buying gloves for the Venus de Milo.
#16 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 9 Episode 3 (S09E03) - 17 #17 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 9 Episode 3 (S09E03) - 18 #18 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 9 Episode 3 (S09E03) - 19
How are you supposed to sleep on a hard, fat, pillow? I'll get you another pillow.
#19 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 9 Episode 3 (S09E03) - 20
Well, there's really not a lot to tell.
#20 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 9 Episode 3 (S09E03) - 21
I just don't know where to start.
#21 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 9 Episode 3 (S09E03) - 22
Please, Margaret, I'd just rather not talk about it.
#22 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 9 Episode 3 (S09E03) - 23
Well, I'm sure you won't let it happen again.
#23 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 9 Episode 3 (S09E03) - 24 #24 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 9 Episode 3 (S09E03) - 25
Margaret tells me you're an old cavalry man too.
#25 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 9 Episode 3 (S09E03) - 26
When I ship out of here...
#26 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 9 Episode 3 (S09E03) - 27
You figure that retirement is like a full-time R & R...
#27 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 9 Episode 3 (S09E03) - 28
- [Potter Continues, Indistinct] - Uh-oh.
#28 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 9 Episode 3 (S09E03) - 29
Well, there's been no formal declaration of war.
#29 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 9 Episode 3 (S09E03) - 30
Why shouldn't we be clowns? We're living in a three-ring circus.
#30 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 9 Episode 3 (S09E03) - 31
- Hawkeye, wake up! - I'm not asleep. I'm dead.
#31 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 9 Episode 3 (S09E03) - 32
- That's our beef. - We stole it fair and square.
#32 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 9 Episode 3 (S09E03) - 33
mm-hmm, Max, aren't we the Four Musketeers...
#33 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 9 Episode 3 (S09E03) - 34
Pierce, if this is another practical joke, and there is no side of beef...
#34 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 9 Episode 3 (S09E03) - 35
After your little shenanigans last night, my father is packing to leave right now.
#35 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 9 Episode 3 (S09E03) - 36
You both are nothing but a pair of juvenile delinquents.
#36 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 9 Episode 3 (S09E03) - 37
- That's meat. - Just following doctors' orders.
#37 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 9 Episode 3 (S09E03) - 38
Well, he said that something came up, but I know what really happened.
#38 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 9 Episode 3 (S09E03) - 39
Now just listen, Margaret. Would I be telling you this if it wasn't true?
#39 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 9 Episode 3 (S09E03) - 40
And then the foul-up in O.R.
#40 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 9 Episode 3 (S09E03) - 41
[Knocking]
#41 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 9 Episode 3 (S09E03) - 42
Is that so? Well, you sure got a funny way of showing it.
#42 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 9 Episode 3 (S09E03) - 43
- That should say it all. - It doesn't say enough...
#43 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 9 Episode 3 (S09E03) - 44 #44 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 9 Episode 3 (S09E03) - 45
You'd rather crush her feelings than let on you're human like the rest of us?
#45 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 9 Episode 3 (S09E03) - 46
who would have acted the way you did the other night...
#46 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 9 Episode 3 (S09E03) - 47 #47 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 9 Episode 3 (S09E03) - 48
Oh, my, seems like quite a little wait for the showers.
#48 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 9 Episode 3 (S09E03) - 49
Oh, Dad, I wish you didn't have to go now.
#49 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 9 Episode 3 (S09E03) - 50 #50