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Two and a Half Men

S4 E4
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Ended
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CBS
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Season 4  "A Pot Smoking Monkey"  4x4

Aired 18 years ago - Oct 09, 2006

Alan tries to hire his ex-wife's lawyer to help him win custody over the dog he and Kandi shared.

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Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 4 Episode 4 (S04E04) - 1
Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 4 Episode 4 (S04E04) - 2
You know, you get one week, and I get one week.
 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 4 Episode 4 (S04E04) - 3
Speaking of fair, it doesn't seem fair that mom has to pay me and you don't.
 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 4 Episode 4 (S04E04) - 4
Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 4 Episode 4 (S04E04) - 5
Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 4 Episode 4 (S04E04) - 6
What are you, drunk?
 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 4 Episode 4 (S04E04) - 7
Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 4 Episode 4 (S04E04) - 8
What do you want, Alan?
 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 4 Episode 4 (S04E04) - 9
Anyhoo, I'm gonna need a good lawyer, and, huh... I thought, you know,
 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 4 Episode 4 (S04E04) - 10
You're joking, right?
 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 4 Episode 4 (S04E04) - 11
I resented you when we divorced, but I don't think I hated you
 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 4 Episode 4 (S04E04) - 12
I'm sure we can find some household chores for you to do.
 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 4 Episode 4 (S04E04) - 13
Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 4 Episode 4 (S04E04) - 14
Here, eat these instead.
 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 4 Episode 4 (S04E04) - 15
Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 4 Episode 4 (S04E04) - 16
Well maybe he doesn't want to see you.
 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 4 Episode 4 (S04E04) - 17
If you have anything to say, you can say it to my lawyer.
 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 4 Episode 4 (S04E04) - 18
the jackal!
 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 4 Episode 4 (S04E04) - 19
there's nothing legal billing on here.
 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 4 Episode 4 (S04E04) - 20
Serves me right, betting against a kid who can eat a happy meal, toys and all...
 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 4 Episode 4 (S04E04) - 21
Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 4 Episode 4 (S04E04) - 22
Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 4 Episode 4 (S04E04) - 23
-Well, yeah, but.. -So you're not exactly a good example.
 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 4 Episode 4 (S04E04) - 24
Will you drive me to the mall?
 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 4 Episode 4 (S04E04) - 25
Haha! A present for Wendy Chow!
 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 4 Episode 4 (S04E04) - 26
but you gotta admit, he's a good judge of character.
 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 4 Episode 4 (S04E04) - 27
-Positive. -Huh? Sure sounds like it.
 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 4 Episode 4 (S04E04) - 28
Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 4 Episode 4 (S04E04) - 29
Skull earrings?
 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 4 Episode 4 (S04E04) - 30
How do you know?
 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 4 Episode 4 (S04E04) - 31
Just out of curiosity, does this Wendy Chow hate her parents?
 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 4 Episode 4 (S04E04) - 32
Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 4 Episode 4 (S04E04) - 33
Nothing, that... that's terrific.
 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 4 Episode 4 (S04E04) - 34
A lot of them.
 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 4 Episode 4 (S04E04) - 35
Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 4 Episode 4 (S04E04) - 36
Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 4 Episode 4 (S04E04) - 37
if it means we can get out of here quicker, I'll front you the difference.
 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 4 Episode 4 (S04E04) - 38
Come on, Brainiac.
 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 4 Episode 4 (S04E04) - 39
How does it feel?
 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 4 Episode 4 (S04E04) - 40
Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 4 Episode 4 (S04E04) - 41
Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 4 Episode 4 (S04E04) - 42
Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 4 Episode 4 (S04E04) - 43
I practically crapped my pants, is what I did to him.
 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 4 Episode 4 (S04E04) - 44
Oh come on, look at him, how could you not love this face?
 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 4 Episode 4 (S04E04) - 45
Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 4 Episode 4 (S04E04) - 46
Especially stolen dogs who are big enough to make me their bitch!
 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 4 Episode 4 (S04E04) - 47
I was very careful. I left the door open, so when Kandi comes home,
 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 4 Episode 4 (S04E04) - 48
How am I supposed to hide him?
 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 4 Episode 4 (S04E04) - 49
Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 4 Episode 4 (S04E04) - 50

Or scroll and see one by one:

Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 4 Episode 4 (S04E04) - 2
You know, you get one week, and I get one week.
#2 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 4 Episode 4 (S04E04) - 3
Speaking of fair, it doesn't seem fair that mom has to pay me and you don't.
#3 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 4 Episode 4 (S04E04) - 4 #4 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 4 Episode 4 (S04E04) - 5 #5 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 4 Episode 4 (S04E04) - 6
What are you, drunk?
#6 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 4 Episode 4 (S04E04) - 7 #7 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 4 Episode 4 (S04E04) - 8
What do you want, Alan?
#8 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 4 Episode 4 (S04E04) - 9
Anyhoo, I'm gonna need a good lawyer, and, huh... I thought, you know,
#9 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 4 Episode 4 (S04E04) - 10
You're joking, right?
#10 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 4 Episode 4 (S04E04) - 11
I resented you when we divorced, but I don't think I hated you
#11 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 4 Episode 4 (S04E04) - 12
I'm sure we can find some household chores for you to do.
#12 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 4 Episode 4 (S04E04) - 13 #13 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 4 Episode 4 (S04E04) - 14
Here, eat these instead.
#14 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 4 Episode 4 (S04E04) - 15 #15 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 4 Episode 4 (S04E04) - 16
Well maybe he doesn't want to see you.
#16 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 4 Episode 4 (S04E04) - 17
If you have anything to say, you can say it to my lawyer.
#17 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 4 Episode 4 (S04E04) - 18
the jackal!
#18 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 4 Episode 4 (S04E04) - 19
there's nothing legal billing on here.
#19 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 4 Episode 4 (S04E04) - 20
Serves me right, betting against a kid who can eat a happy meal, toys and all...
#20 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 4 Episode 4 (S04E04) - 21 #21 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 4 Episode 4 (S04E04) - 22 #22 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 4 Episode 4 (S04E04) - 23
-Well, yeah, but.. -So you're not exactly a good example.
#23 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 4 Episode 4 (S04E04) - 24
Will you drive me to the mall?
#24 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 4 Episode 4 (S04E04) - 25
Haha! A present for Wendy Chow!
#25 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 4 Episode 4 (S04E04) - 26
but you gotta admit, he's a good judge of character.
#26 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 4 Episode 4 (S04E04) - 27
-Positive. -Huh? Sure sounds like it.
#27 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 4 Episode 4 (S04E04) - 28 #28 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 4 Episode 4 (S04E04) - 29
Skull earrings?
#29 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 4 Episode 4 (S04E04) - 30
How do you know?
#30 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 4 Episode 4 (S04E04) - 31
Just out of curiosity, does this Wendy Chow hate her parents?
#31 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 4 Episode 4 (S04E04) - 32 #32 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 4 Episode 4 (S04E04) - 33
Nothing, that... that's terrific.
#33 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 4 Episode 4 (S04E04) - 34
A lot of them.
#34 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 4 Episode 4 (S04E04) - 35 #35 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 4 Episode 4 (S04E04) - 36 #36 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 4 Episode 4 (S04E04) - 37
if it means we can get out of here quicker, I'll front you the difference.
#37 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 4 Episode 4 (S04E04) - 38
Come on, Brainiac.
#38 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 4 Episode 4 (S04E04) - 39
How does it feel?
#39 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 4 Episode 4 (S04E04) - 40 #40 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 4 Episode 4 (S04E04) - 41 #41 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 4 Episode 4 (S04E04) - 42 #42 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 4 Episode 4 (S04E04) - 43
I practically crapped my pants, is what I did to him.
#43 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 4 Episode 4 (S04E04) - 44
Oh come on, look at him, how could you not love this face?
#44 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 4 Episode 4 (S04E04) - 45 #45 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 4 Episode 4 (S04E04) - 46
Especially stolen dogs who are big enough to make me their bitch!
#46 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 4 Episode 4 (S04E04) - 47
I was very careful. I left the door open, so when Kandi comes home,
#47 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 4 Episode 4 (S04E04) - 48
How am I supposed to hide him?
#48 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 4 Episode 4 (S04E04) - 49 #49 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 4 Episode 4 (S04E04) - 50 #50