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Two and a Half Men

S11 E4
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Ended
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CBS
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Season 11  "Clank, Clank, Drunken Skank"  11x4

Aired 10 years ago - Oct 17, 2013

Walden parties with Jenny and her attractive friends; Alan's illicit affair with Lyndsey is jeopardized.

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Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 11 Episode 4 (S11E04) - 1
I ended up playing strip poker with four incredibly beautiful women.
 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 11 Episode 4 (S11E04) - 2
She was the dealer. But she did flop a great pair.
 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 11 Episode 4 (S11E04) - 3
You were wearing a sock. And not on your foot.
 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 11 Episode 4 (S11E04) - 4
- Yeah, sure. - Cool, I'll see ya at 11:00.
 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 11 Episode 4 (S11E04) - 5
And you don't think that's a little sad?
 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 11 Episode 4 (S11E04) - 6
I was delivering pizza, going to junior college
 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 11 Episode 4 (S11E04) - 7
Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 11 Episode 4 (S11E04) - 8
I'll pass. What's with the bag?
 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 11 Episode 4 (S11E04) - 9
I know, it's great.
 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 11 Episode 4 (S11E04) - 10
Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 11 Episode 4 (S11E04) - 11
Well, the important thing is, I'm here now
 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 11 Episode 4 (S11E04) - 12
it's the going Dutch.
 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 11 Episode 4 (S11E04) - 13
and respectfully disrespect each other?
 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 11 Episode 4 (S11E04) - 14
Lyndsey, Alan!
 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 11 Episode 4 (S11E04) - 15
Are you guys back together? Did you split up with Larry?
 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 11 Episode 4 (S11E04) - 16
and this former fatty is looking for a sugar-daddy.
 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 11 Episode 4 (S11E04) - 17
Okay, I'm gonna leave you two "friends" alone.
 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 11 Episode 4 (S11E04) - 18
Yeah, she is horrible.
 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 11 Episode 4 (S11E04) - 19
Can't I just kill her? It'd be a much smaller grave to dig.
 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 11 Episode 4 (S11E04) - 20
Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 11 Episode 4 (S11E04) - 21
Whoa, this is a beautiful house!
 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 11 Episode 4 (S11E04) - 22
(DANCE MUSIC) Aah!
 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 11 Episode 4 (S11E04) - 23
Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 11 Episode 4 (S11E04) - 24
Alan, I'm high.
 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 11 Episode 4 (S11E04) - 25
Yeah, Alan's right.
 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 11 Episode 4 (S11E04) - 26
and my girlfriend's banging another dude.
 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 11 Episode 4 (S11E04) - 27
Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 11 Episode 4 (S11E04) - 28
Damn.
 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 11 Episode 4 (S11E04) - 29
Whoa!
 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 11 Episode 4 (S11E04) - 30
Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 11 Episode 4 (S11E04) - 31
Or ten being, "I'm going Subaru shopping with Ellen and Rosie."
 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 11 Episode 4 (S11E04) - 32
Okay, okay, so we didn't have sex. That is a load off.
 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 11 Episode 4 (S11E04) - 33
Oh, God, if Alan finds out, he's gonna freak out.
 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 11 Episode 4 (S11E04) - 34
So deny that we ever woke up in bed, naked, together?
 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 11 Episode 4 (S11E04) - 35
You're not the first one to say that!
 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 11 Episode 4 (S11E04) - 36
You should hear her wine bottles in her trash bins on Friday morning.
 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 11 Episode 4 (S11E04) - 37
Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 11 Episode 4 (S11E04) - 38
I can't eat a portion larger than my fist.
 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 11 Episode 4 (S11E04) - 39
(SOFT MUSIC PLAYING ON TV)
 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 11 Episode 4 (S11E04) - 40
I'm not peeing on any sticks.
 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 11 Episode 4 (S11E04) - 41
So, we could watch the video back and know for sure.
 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 11 Episode 4 (S11E04) - 42
Only the quarterback's a lesbian.
 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 11 Episode 4 (S11E04) - 43
So, both of my ex-husbands turned out to be gay.
 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 11 Episode 4 (S11E04) - 44
Come on in.
 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 11 Episode 4 (S11E04) - 45
And I am definitely gonna have to come to terms with that
 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 11 Episode 4 (S11E04) - 46
I just feel bad for her boyfriend.
 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 11 Episode 4 (S11E04) - 47
Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 11 Episode 4 (S11E04) - 48
Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 11 Episode 4 (S11E04) - 49
You know what? Let's just go back to denial.
 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 11 Episode 4 (S11E04) - 50
God, I love living at the beach.

Or scroll and see one by one:

Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 11 Episode 4 (S11E04) - 2
She was the dealer. But she did flop a great pair.
#2 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 11 Episode 4 (S11E04) - 3
You were wearing a sock. And not on your foot.
#3 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 11 Episode 4 (S11E04) - 4
- Yeah, sure. - Cool, I'll see ya at 11:00.
#4 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 11 Episode 4 (S11E04) - 5
And you don't think that's a little sad?
#5 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 11 Episode 4 (S11E04) - 6
I was delivering pizza, going to junior college
#6 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 11 Episode 4 (S11E04) - 7 #7 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 11 Episode 4 (S11E04) - 8
I'll pass. What's with the bag?
#8 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 11 Episode 4 (S11E04) - 9
I know, it's great.
#9 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 11 Episode 4 (S11E04) - 10 #10 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 11 Episode 4 (S11E04) - 11
Well, the important thing is, I'm here now
#11 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 11 Episode 4 (S11E04) - 12
it's the going Dutch.
#12 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 11 Episode 4 (S11E04) - 13
and respectfully disrespect each other?
#13 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 11 Episode 4 (S11E04) - 14
Lyndsey, Alan!
#14 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 11 Episode 4 (S11E04) - 15
Are you guys back together? Did you split up with Larry?
#15 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 11 Episode 4 (S11E04) - 16
and this former fatty is looking for a sugar-daddy.
#16 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 11 Episode 4 (S11E04) - 17
Okay, I'm gonna leave you two "friends" alone.
#17 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 11 Episode 4 (S11E04) - 18
Yeah, she is horrible.
#18 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 11 Episode 4 (S11E04) - 19
Can't I just kill her? It'd be a much smaller grave to dig.
#19 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 11 Episode 4 (S11E04) - 20 #20 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 11 Episode 4 (S11E04) - 21
Whoa, this is a beautiful house!
#21 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 11 Episode 4 (S11E04) - 22
(DANCE MUSIC) Aah!
#22 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 11 Episode 4 (S11E04) - 23 #23 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 11 Episode 4 (S11E04) - 24
Alan, I'm high.
#24 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 11 Episode 4 (S11E04) - 25
Yeah, Alan's right.
#25 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 11 Episode 4 (S11E04) - 26
and my girlfriend's banging another dude.
#26 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 11 Episode 4 (S11E04) - 27 #27 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 11 Episode 4 (S11E04) - 28
Damn.
#28 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 11 Episode 4 (S11E04) - 29
Whoa!
#29 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 11 Episode 4 (S11E04) - 30 #30 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 11 Episode 4 (S11E04) - 31
Or ten being, "I'm going Subaru shopping with Ellen and Rosie."
#31 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 11 Episode 4 (S11E04) - 32
Okay, okay, so we didn't have sex. That is a load off.
#32 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 11 Episode 4 (S11E04) - 33
Oh, God, if Alan finds out, he's gonna freak out.
#33 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 11 Episode 4 (S11E04) - 34
So deny that we ever woke up in bed, naked, together?
#34 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 11 Episode 4 (S11E04) - 35
You're not the first one to say that!
#35 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 11 Episode 4 (S11E04) - 36
You should hear her wine bottles in her trash bins on Friday morning.
#36 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 11 Episode 4 (S11E04) - 37 #37 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 11 Episode 4 (S11E04) - 38
I can't eat a portion larger than my fist.
#38 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 11 Episode 4 (S11E04) - 39
(SOFT MUSIC PLAYING ON TV)
#39 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 11 Episode 4 (S11E04) - 40
I'm not peeing on any sticks.
#40 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 11 Episode 4 (S11E04) - 41
So, we could watch the video back and know for sure.
#41 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 11 Episode 4 (S11E04) - 42
Only the quarterback's a lesbian.
#42 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 11 Episode 4 (S11E04) - 43
So, both of my ex-husbands turned out to be gay.
#43 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 11 Episode 4 (S11E04) - 44
Come on in.
#44 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 11 Episode 4 (S11E04) - 45
And I am definitely gonna have to come to terms with that
#45 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 11 Episode 4 (S11E04) - 46
I just feel bad for her boyfriend.
#46 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 11 Episode 4 (S11E04) - 47 #47 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 11 Episode 4 (S11E04) - 48 #48 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 11 Episode 4 (S11E04) - 49
You know what? Let's just go back to denial.
#49 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 11 Episode 4 (S11E04) - 50
God, I love living at the beach.
#50