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Two and a Half Men

S11 E13
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Season 11  "Bite Me, Supreme Court"  11x13

Aired 10 years ago - Jan 30, 2014

Marty Pepper (Carl Reiner) proposes to Evelyn; Alan and Walden plan a bachelor party for Marty.

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Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 11 Episode 13 (S11E13) - 1
- Oh, my God, really? - Not you. Pretty boy over there.
 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 11 Episode 13 (S11E13) - 2
Of course. It's like I'm not even here.
 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 11 Episode 13 (S11E13) - 3
Maybe we should discuss this before we offer up our place.
 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 11 Episode 13 (S11E13) - 4
Oh, Berta, can I try something out on you?
 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 11 Episode 13 (S11E13) - 5
So, you're telling everyone you're a son of a bitch?
 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 11 Episode 13 (S11E13) - 6
Hey, where you thinking about having this thing anyway?
 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 11 Episode 13 (S11E13) - 7
But more importantly, we can't let the last naked woman
 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 11 Episode 13 (S11E13) - 8
Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 11 Episode 13 (S11E13) - 9
Thank you.
 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 11 Episode 13 (S11E13) - 10
Yeah, and, at the time, he was married to Cher.
 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 11 Episode 13 (S11E13) - 11
First to Walden
 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 11 Episode 13 (S11E13) - 12
My mother and I have had our ups and downs,
 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 11 Episode 13 (S11E13) - 13
and he had the charge reduced to following too closely.
 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 11 Episode 13 (S11E13) - 14
we were in a threesome with that cute little redhead.
 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 11 Episode 13 (S11E13) - 15
You can barely get through nine holes of golf.
 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 11 Episode 13 (S11E13) - 16
I might be in the minority here, but I still believe in love
 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 11 Episode 13 (S11E13) - 17
except a good opening weekend.
 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 11 Episode 13 (S11E13) - 18
Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 11 Episode 13 (S11E13) - 19
Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 11 Episode 13 (S11E13) - 20
I haven't been up for a lap dance since the Reagan Administration.
 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 11 Episode 13 (S11E13) - 21
so whether you're in the middle of a lap dance or CPR,
 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 11 Episode 13 (S11E13) - 22
- Hey, you'd look good in these. - No, dear.
 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 11 Episode 13 (S11E13) - 23
Oh, don't remind me.
 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 11 Episode 13 (S11E13) - 24
Yeah, there's just 400 million things about Marty.
 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 11 Episode 13 (S11E13) - 25
And having you with me is like having Charlie around.
 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 11 Episode 13 (S11E13) - 26
Oh, speaking of hogs, I once did a show with Miss Piggy.
 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 11 Episode 13 (S11E13) - 27
Oh, well, then you tell your mother the wedding is off.
 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 11 Episode 13 (S11E13) - 28
I had, "Died during the lap dance."
 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 11 Episode 13 (S11E13) - 29
Well, I have, "Alan will screw this up somehow."
 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 11 Episode 13 (S11E13) - 30
Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 11 Episode 13 (S11E13) - 31
Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 11 Episode 13 (S11E13) - 32
- You hired strippers. - That's why I said "us."
 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 11 Episode 13 (S11E13) - 33
Will you stop saying that. It's because of you.
 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 11 Episode 13 (S11E13) - 34
We're not gay.
 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 11 Episode 13 (S11E13) - 35
(NERVOUSLY) Hey, Mommy, did you have fun shopping?
 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 11 Episode 13 (S11E13) - 36
but maybe not.
 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 11 Episode 13 (S11E13) - 37
Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 11 Episode 13 (S11E13) - 38
and I think one of them has a nurse's outfit.
 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 11 Episode 13 (S11E13) - 39
I'm all right. You can't force someone to love you.
 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 11 Episode 13 (S11E13) - 40
- Wow. - Yeah.
 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 11 Episode 13 (S11E13) - 41
- I'm sorry, Mr. Pepper is busy. - Really?
 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 11 Episode 13 (S11E13) - 42
Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 11 Episode 13 (S11E13) - 43
Evelyn's gay son and his boyfriend.
 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 11 Episode 13 (S11E13) - 44
Maybe when I get a little older.
 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 11 Episode 13 (S11E13) - 45
I'm not saying she doesn't have her charms.
 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 11 Episode 13 (S11E13) - 46
you have to take a leap and hope for the best.
 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 11 Episode 13 (S11E13) - 47
So, why aren't you two married?
 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 11 Episode 13 (S11E13) - 48
I don't wanna end up alone
 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 11 Episode 13 (S11E13) - 49
When I wake up in the morning, when I go to bed at night,
 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 11 Episode 13 (S11E13) - 50

Or scroll and see one by one:

Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 11 Episode 13 (S11E13) - 2
Of course. It's like I'm not even here.
#2 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 11 Episode 13 (S11E13) - 3
Maybe we should discuss this before we offer up our place.
#3 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 11 Episode 13 (S11E13) - 4
Oh, Berta, can I try something out on you?
#4 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 11 Episode 13 (S11E13) - 5
So, you're telling everyone you're a son of a bitch?
#5 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 11 Episode 13 (S11E13) - 6
Hey, where you thinking about having this thing anyway?
#6 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 11 Episode 13 (S11E13) - 7
But more importantly, we can't let the last naked woman
#7 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 11 Episode 13 (S11E13) - 8 #8 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 11 Episode 13 (S11E13) - 9
Thank you.
#9 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 11 Episode 13 (S11E13) - 10
Yeah, and, at the time, he was married to Cher.
#10 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 11 Episode 13 (S11E13) - 11
First to Walden
#11 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 11 Episode 13 (S11E13) - 12
My mother and I have had our ups and downs,
#12 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 11 Episode 13 (S11E13) - 13
and he had the charge reduced to following too closely.
#13 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 11 Episode 13 (S11E13) - 14
we were in a threesome with that cute little redhead.
#14 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 11 Episode 13 (S11E13) - 15
You can barely get through nine holes of golf.
#15 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 11 Episode 13 (S11E13) - 16
I might be in the minority here, but I still believe in love
#16 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 11 Episode 13 (S11E13) - 17
except a good opening weekend.
#17 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 11 Episode 13 (S11E13) - 18 #18 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 11 Episode 13 (S11E13) - 19 #19 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 11 Episode 13 (S11E13) - 20
I haven't been up for a lap dance since the Reagan Administration.
#20 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 11 Episode 13 (S11E13) - 21
so whether you're in the middle of a lap dance or CPR,
#21 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 11 Episode 13 (S11E13) - 22
- Hey, you'd look good in these. - No, dear.
#22 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 11 Episode 13 (S11E13) - 23
Oh, don't remind me.
#23 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 11 Episode 13 (S11E13) - 24
Yeah, there's just 400 million things about Marty.
#24 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 11 Episode 13 (S11E13) - 25
And having you with me is like having Charlie around.
#25 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 11 Episode 13 (S11E13) - 26
Oh, speaking of hogs, I once did a show with Miss Piggy.
#26 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 11 Episode 13 (S11E13) - 27
Oh, well, then you tell your mother the wedding is off.
#27 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 11 Episode 13 (S11E13) - 28
I had, "Died during the lap dance."
#28 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 11 Episode 13 (S11E13) - 29
Well, I have, "Alan will screw this up somehow."
#29 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 11 Episode 13 (S11E13) - 30 #30 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 11 Episode 13 (S11E13) - 31 #31 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 11 Episode 13 (S11E13) - 32
- You hired strippers. - That's why I said "us."
#32 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 11 Episode 13 (S11E13) - 33
Will you stop saying that. It's because of you.
#33 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 11 Episode 13 (S11E13) - 34
We're not gay.
#34 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 11 Episode 13 (S11E13) - 35
(NERVOUSLY) Hey, Mommy, did you have fun shopping?
#35 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 11 Episode 13 (S11E13) - 36
but maybe not.
#36 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 11 Episode 13 (S11E13) - 37 #37 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 11 Episode 13 (S11E13) - 38
and I think one of them has a nurse's outfit.
#38 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 11 Episode 13 (S11E13) - 39
I'm all right. You can't force someone to love you.
#39 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 11 Episode 13 (S11E13) - 40
- Wow. - Yeah.
#40 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 11 Episode 13 (S11E13) - 41
- I'm sorry, Mr. Pepper is busy. - Really?
#41 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 11 Episode 13 (S11E13) - 42 #42 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 11 Episode 13 (S11E13) - 43
Evelyn's gay son and his boyfriend.
#43 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 11 Episode 13 (S11E13) - 44
Maybe when I get a little older.
#44 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 11 Episode 13 (S11E13) - 45
I'm not saying she doesn't have her charms.
#45 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 11 Episode 13 (S11E13) - 46
you have to take a leap and hope for the best.
#46 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 11 Episode 13 (S11E13) - 47
So, why aren't you two married?
#47 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 11 Episode 13 (S11E13) - 48
I don't wanna end up alone
#48 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 11 Episode 13 (S11E13) - 49
When I wake up in the morning, when I go to bed at night,
#49 Recap of Two and a Half Men Season 11 Episode 13 (S11E13) - 50 #50