Status
Continuing
Next episode
2 years ago
Airs
Sundays 8:00 PM on Disney+
SEASON
EPISODE

Season 11

Aired 23 years ago - May 21, 2000

In this satire of VH1's "Behind The Music," we learn the secrets of the Simpsons' rise, fall, and ultimate success.

Recap of The Simpsons Season 11 Episode 22 (S11E22) - 1
just staring at that Hollywood Hogwash.
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Homer kept saying he could do a more realistic family show.
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- [Whirring ] - [ Both Gasp]
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But Homer and I had real chemistry on screen.
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[ Narrator] the Simpsons had their foot in the door.
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- ##[ Continues, Indistinct] - [ Laughing, Gurgling ]
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[ Narrator] The Simpsons was a smash.
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- Why, you little- [ Sputtering ] - [ Choking ]
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and Simpson Gin wetting whistles worldwide, the money was pouring in.
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Mmm. Ah.
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♪♪ [ Vocalizing ]
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Meanwhile, Krustophenia sits on the shelf.
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Right. And the award for Best Hard-core Thrash Metal goes to...
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- [ Buzzing ] - When we come back-
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fire hoses of respect- the Simpsons had it all.
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Oh, Homer was spending money like a... teenage Arab. [ Chuckles ]
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Hey, did we ever get that money?.
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- Yep. There I go. - [ Grunting ]
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[ Narrator] Somehow, Homer became addicted to painkillers.
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-[Whistling, Screaming ] -But what was even more like a drug was the drugs.
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And just a few stars down from the Cheerios honeybee.
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Marge lost much of the family fortune investing in birth control products.
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then hundreds.
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that the Simpsons were evading their income taxes.
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- Oh! - [ Snaps Fingers ]
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took its toll on their TV series.
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Who told you about those laws?. Was it Marge?.
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I 'm... an impostor.
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[ Narrator] But there were bigger problems off-screen.
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- ## [ Country] - [ Narrator] It was an evening none of them would ever forget.
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Yeah, forget the doughnuts. We're here to go nuts.
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- I'll kill you! - [ Grunts ] You don't have the guts, little man!
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- # Got a brother named Billy and my teeth look silly # - [ Cheering, Laughing]
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- [Narrator] the dream was over. - [ Busy Signal Beeping ]
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♪♪ [ Rock]
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After the state fair fiasco, none of the family were speaking to each other.
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As a young female artist...
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♪ I need them all right now ♪♪
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♪♪[Rock]
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- [ Laughing ] - Good night, Laughlin.
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That's ridiculous.
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- You don't have to answer that. - Shut up, all of you, or I'll sue.
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- [ Squawking ] - But then came help from an unexpected source.
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Not again. Time saver, my ass.
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Or would his olive branch be torn apart by woodpeckers of mistrust?
Aired 23 years ago - May 14, 2000

When Otto dumps his bride at the altar, she goes to live with the Simpsons - and the family comes to believe that Marge has lost her mind.

Recap of The Simpsons Season 11 Episode 21 (S11E21) - 1
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- Honey, could you turn it down?. - Okay. But this better be worth it.
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Huh?. Zig-Zag?
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I told Otto he could have the wedding here. Hope that's okay.
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But, Homer, you have to get rid of that elephant.
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♪♪[ Organ ]
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Dad! The bride and groom are supposed to cut the wedding cake.
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Oh, we'll be fine. Otto's got a clean police record and he doesn't do any needle drugs.
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Oh, you can fix little defects like that with gentle nagging.
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- What?. - You know, my emolument.
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Whoo!. [Laughing] #Ah,yeah#
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- [ Sobs ] our song. - Well, it doesn't have to be.
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In about 1 5 minutes, I'd take off that wedding dress...
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Ah, you know what?. Cram some shrimp in too.
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- Yea! - [ Groans ]
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[ Grunting, Moans ]
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May I?. Mmm, yummers!
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Thanks to our own spice girl, Becky.
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No! Oh, Becky, your potatoes are the best I've ever had.
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Well, no kicking. It's too dangerous.
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Hello? Hello!.
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Yes. I hate when things get worn out.
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but I think my family likes Becky more than me. [ Laughing ]
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- That was a movie. - Look, all we know...
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- Oh, and here's your brush. - [Whimpers ]
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Be right back.
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The "brakes cut"light! Hmm?
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[ Screaming ]
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Fine. Let me tell you what I tell everybody who comes in here.
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Come on, Becky. Tell us your big news.
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Anoint them with 62 sauces, whipped cream and nuts.
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We gotta save him!
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- [ Gasps ] - Shut up, Becky!
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Poor Maggie. How many insanity hearings...
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did you ever have an unhealthy fixation on Ringo Starr?.
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I see. And this "god," is he in this room right now?.
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[Whimpering ]
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Even here at Juggernauts where it's wet T-shirt month!
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Then we'll have Mommy back.
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Now, Ralphie, what are you gonna do if you see Mrs. Simpson?.
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And, boy, is she crazy. Crazy Marge Simpson!
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All right. Stop it! Oh, this bit's dying.
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[ Gasps ]
Aired 23 years ago - May 07, 2000

Lisa enters a tap dancing academy, where the teacher is a child star who never quite grew up. Meanwhile, Homer gets laser eye surgery.

Recap of The Simpsons Season 11 Episode 20 (S11E20) - 1
Ooh! My favorite Door.
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BlairWitch repellent, antler saw and deep-woods Scrabble.
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Wait. You gotta use these drops. They prevent your eyes from crusting over.
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I know that somewhere your father is looking down on you and smiling.
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- Hmm. - Oh, he'll never dance with her.
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Qué malo. Once again, I must sugar my own churro.
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She's not plain. She's beautiful.
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My twin brother, Freduardo.
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That's wonderful, honey.
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I'm just plain Vicki now.
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- You're not a leader, Seymour. Never have been, neverwill be. - Oh!
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But I want to learn a dance I can use in real life, like the tango de la muerte.
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- [ Grunts ] - Yes, sir.
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My grandma's sleeping in my bed, and she has skin like a basketball.
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For an evening or a week, there's no place like the mall.
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Teacher, my shoes are making noise.
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Whoa. [ Shouts ]
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♪ Ifyou're happy and you know it shop at Stan's ♪
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- Where are we goin'?. - Quiet.Just keep scurrying.
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There's candy chewed, wigs pulled from stands...
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Now shut this place down before the old folks come in for their morning walk.
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Why, backwhen I was your age, I had 43 movies under my belt...
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Hey, we got a postcard from Bart.
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- Hey, dig that crazy rhythm. - I'm just walking.
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before we kept interrupting with our loving proudness?.
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[ Together] Aww!
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- Dancin'. - Dancin'?.
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It is, silly. You've got the most important part of all.
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And I didn't tap all those Morse code messages to the Allies...
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,Scuse me, Lisa, but I couldn,t help but overhearyournerdlypredicament.
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with an exuberant shaking ofits groove thing, yeah, yeah.
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Well, I also found this at the gift shop. Isn't it cute?.
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- [ Roars ] - [ Screaming ]
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And that's the end ofthat tale.
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Little Vicki, I figured out how to dance. I can be in the show now.
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Whateverwill we do?. There's only one person who can get us out ofthis pickle.
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- Where's Lisa?. - Shh! This plot is hard enough to follow as it is.
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♪We just love to dance on Mars where everything- ♪♪
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Nobody upstages Little Vicki. [ Hisses ]
Aired 24 years ago - Apr 30, 2000

After a terrible bout with insomnia, Homer takes the family to Florida during spring break. There, they kill a beloved alligator and are sentenced to a chain gang.

Recap of The Simpsons Season 11 Episode 19 (S11E19) - 1
Okay, ''nonsmoker- add eight years.'' Hmm.
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I've only got three more years to live.
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No! [ Sobbing ]
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Was Paramount chomping at the bit to make it? [ Chuckles ]
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But you had problems with the sequel, The Two Jakes?
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Maybe you should see a doctor, Homie. A head doctor.
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So tell me, are all you government inspectors so handsome and strapping?
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- Is this man an employee? - Of course not.
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[ Nervous Laughing ]
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- Because it's made of plastic. - I see.
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- My pockets hurt. - Okay, honey. We're almost to Palm Corners.
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[ Gasps ] Take 'em off the glass! Take 'em off the glass!
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#Hey. boys it's the wild weekend #
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[ Yawns ] Well. enjoy your sightseeing.
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Party! Party!
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- And since it's my birthday, we'll party extra hard! - [ Beeping ]
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Whoo! I like music!
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- ## [ Rock ] - Yo, Rock. Tell spring break what your name is.
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you'll see another endless stretch of stagnant water.
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Captain Jack helped build Palm Corners by dragging sticks and stones from the swamps.
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Thank you!
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And we're gonna give props to the fallen by pouring a 40 on the curb.
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Beeyotch? Moi? [ Grunts ]
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- Let's do this thing. - All right now, boys, that's enough.
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as long as they play ''Fist of Rage.''
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- I hope he didn't cause too much trouble, Sheriff. - Ah, boys will be boys.
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And I owe it all to... spring break! Whoo!
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Fine. Be nerds.
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♪ Rock and roll ♪
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[ Gasps ] You killed Captain Jack.
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- Did you really have to handcuff the children? - No, ma'am, I did not.
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- Whoa! Looks like we got a teeny Houdini here. - [ All Laughing ]
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It worked! It's a miracle!
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There's lots of good places! What about over there?
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- [ All Screaming ] - [ Siren Stops ]
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[ Homer] Oh! Okay. Now am I the only one on fire?
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- How do you know I'm gonna hire you? - Sorry.
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Y'all can stay in this trailer.
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♪Jimmy crack corn and I'm not there ♪
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- And y'all hardly ever bicker anymore. - Too hot to bicker, I reckon.
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[ Snoring ]
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[ Grunting ]
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Afternoon, folks. I got a new assignment for you.
Recap of The Simpsons Season 11 Episode 19 (S11E19) - 50
Aired 24 years ago - Apr 09, 2000

After being embarrassed by a drunken video of himself, Barney vows to sober up. Newly clean, he gets work as a helicopter pilot.

Recap of The Simpsons Season 11 Episode 18 (S11E18) - 1
I am King Talkie Tiki!
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- Do you know how dangerous that is? - Do not anger Talkie Tiki!
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- [ Sighs ] - Hey, Barney, what's with the glum face?
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But we did have a shindig for you, Barn. We even videotaped it. Look.
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I wrote a poem for Barney on this special occasion.
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- Mr. Gumble, you're upsetting me. - No, I'm not.
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[ High-pitched Voice ] Well, I'm off to market. [ Burps ]
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Oh. How embarrassing.
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morning-after stationery.
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Wait a minute, Barney. You gotta be sober to fly. I mean, it's not like driving a car.
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Well, the handwriting's on the wall.
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Barney, didn't you say you were going to stop drinking?
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[ Mumbling ] Oh, man, that's sweet.
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[ Chattering ]
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Well, after I lost my third job in two days...
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Oh! You're doing this at the worst possible time. Oh, your finger's in my eye!
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They're on that table over there.
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- ## [ Instrumental ] - [ Giggles ] Hurt everyone.
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Did you get it? Here it is.
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And it's still got a roll of film in it.
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So he's so busy worrying about the front rotor, he walks right into the back one.
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Elvis played a chopper pilot one time. [ Chuckles ]
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One sec. Testing, black box. One, two.
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[ Grunting ]
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[ Bell Dings ]
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But that's Barney's seat.
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Get it away from the house!
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Can you believe I'm flyin' this helicopter?
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Those are all priceless memories, Homer...
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I don't wanna talk about it. [ Sobbing ]
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Cheer up, Homie. You don't need friends to be happy.
Recap of The Simpsons Season 11 Episode 18 (S11E18) - 35
Old friends stick together, like O.J. and A.C., or the Falcon and the Snowman.
Recap of The Simpsons Season 11 Episode 18 (S11E18) - 36
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- Then we agree. - You keep thinking that.
Recap of The Simpsons Season 11 Episode 18 (S11E18) - 39
- The Squidport, the old monorail- - [ Bart ] The Rlay-Doh factory.
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I said heads up.
Recap of The Simpsons Season 11 Episode 18 (S11E18) - 41
- Okay. ## [ Humming Off-key ] - Hiya, Moe.
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and made sweet love to your pool table, which I then befouled.
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as they're all being used to film the new Burt Reynolds movie, Fireball and Mudflap.
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It's garbage.
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- [ Grunting ] - [ Horn Honking ]
Recap of The Simpsons Season 11 Episode 18 (S11E18) - 47
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I love you.
Recap of The Simpsons Season 11 Episode 18 (S11E18) - 49
Recap of The Simpsons Season 11 Episode 18 (S11E18) - 50
Aired 24 years ago - Mar 19, 2000

We see a possible future in which Bart is a grown-up slacker, living with Ralph Wiggum, while Lisa is no less than President of the United States.

Recap of The Simpsons Season 11 Episode 17 (S11E17) - 1
- [ Laughing ] - [ Banging ]
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I foresee a life of bitterness and failure for you. Bart Simpson.
Recap of The Simpsons Season 11 Episode 17 (S11E17) - 4
If you want to see your future...
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Look ahead 30 years...
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- ## [ Out OfTune Chords ] - Check. Check. Hello. Capital City.
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You mean the spider bite at Disneyland?
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But I can only pay you in popcorn shrimp. Smell ya later!
Recap of The Simpsons Season 11 Episode 17 (S11E17) - 9
Recap of The Simpsons Season 11 Episode 17 (S11E17) - 10
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Why can't you be more like Lisa?
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- We're not giving you money. - Oh. but I want some.
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But you can't see it. Oh. you can.
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Oh. it was great at first. But. you know. at the 1 0-year mark. your eyes fall out.
Recap of The Simpsons Season 11 Episode 17 (S11E17) - 15
Oh. all right. But only because you haven't outed Rod and Todd.
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but he uncooly charges people to cover them.
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[ Chirping ]
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and it's all your fault!
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Tonight's winning lotto number- 446.
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1598.
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Now in conclusion. my administration will focus on the three R's:
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The country is broke? How can that be?
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Isn't there any money left for that?
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Co president? Are you crazy?
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##[ ''Hail to the Chief'']
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And look how big she's gotten!
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Hey! That's my helicopter.
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I am proud to honor the players of the Negro Leagues of Rollerball.
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Bart. get out of here!
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- Hey. maybe I could sue 'em! - [ Groans ]
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Gold bars discovered by Marge? Zero!
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But in my speech. I'd like to avoid calling it ''a painful emergency tax.''
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- Fiscal solvency. - Oh. Yeah. Me too.
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- Are you insane? - What? You told me I should do something with my life.
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Refund? Hey. sounds good to me.
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- I never trusted her. - Don't blame me. I voted for Chastity Bono!
Recap of The Simpsons Season 11 Episode 17 (S11E17) - 39
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the purple mountains majesty and the shores of Tripoli.
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- You want him eliminated? - No.Just keep him out of my hair.
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Of what? The United States of Dorksylvania?
Recap of The Simpsons Season 11 Episode 17 (S11E17) - 43
That's why I'm appointing you Secretary of Keeping It Real.
Recap of The Simpsons Season 11 Episode 17 (S11E17) - 44
Whew.
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I don't know any pancakes that were nuked by India! [ Laughing ]
Recap of The Simpsons Season 11 Episode 17 (S11E17) - 46
Recap of The Simpsons Season 11 Episode 17 (S11E17) - 47
he sent me to Belly Flop Academy.
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He got idea from Dances with Focus Groups.
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''My gold is in the heart of every freedom-loving American.''
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- We demand remittance. - Please. calm down! We can work something out.
Aired 24 years ago - Feb 27, 2000

Plastic surgery gives Moe the bartender a handsome new face and a whole new life as a soap opera star.

Recap of The Simpsons Season 11 Episode 16 (S11E16) - 1
[ Screaming ]
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[ Man ] All right, Springfield...
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Today, we're gonna find out which of these bartenders...
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And now, the local lug who fills your mug with the drug you chug-
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Okay, our first event qualifies for course credit...
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I think we know who wins this round.
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See what happens when you skip rehearsal.
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Duff Man says a lot of things. Oh, yeah!
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And the winner, Moe Szyslak!
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Duff's vice president in charge of calendars and fake I.D.'s...
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Those balloons won't biodegrade for 1 0,000 years.
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[ Moans ]
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Yeah, yeah, I've been meaning to get that updated...
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Ah, for the love of Jeff.
Recap of The Simpsons Season 11 Episode 16 (S11E16) - 17
See, this is why I don't talk much.
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what, with the cauliflower ear there and the lizard lips-
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Hey, Moe, if you're tired of being an eyesore, why not get some plastic surgery?
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- Yeah, but you'd feel bad inside. - Plastic surgery it is!
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dancing and twirling, dancing and twirling.
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[ Imitates Bomb Falling, Exploding ]
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Can the medical mumbo jumbo. Can you fix me or not?
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[ Bart Grunting ] Oh, we've gotta get closer.
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I'm awake here.
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A little on the nose, don't you think?
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Hurry! Hurry up! I have to pee!
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Bye-bye.
Recap of The Simpsons Season 11 Episode 16 (S11E16) - 32
You're one of us beautiful people now.
Recap of The Simpsons Season 11 Episode 16 (S11E16) - 33
Duff Man... can't breathe.
Recap of The Simpsons Season 11 Episode 16 (S11E16) - 34
Well, I just wanted to show you the face that you could have been kissing.
Recap of The Simpsons Season 11 Episode 16 (S11E16) - 35
Okay, last stop, Channel 6.
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- Angela, I'm afraid I- - [ Woman ] Thank you. Next.
Recap of The Simpsons Season 11 Episode 16 (S11E16) - 37
I've been called ugly, pug ugly, fugly, pug fugly...
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Oh, shut up, you windy old hack.
Recap of The Simpsons Season 11 Episode 16 (S11E16) - 39
That's going to- Oh.
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[ Male Announcer] Like the cleaning of a house, It Never Ends.
Recap of The Simpsons Season 11 Episode 16 (S11E16) - 41
Well, I'm gonna keep watching...
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It's against hospital regulations, damn it!
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- Okay, now harder. - [ Women Sigh ]
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[ Chuckles ]
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That was amazing, Moe. I'm actually a little turned on.
Recap of The Simpsons Season 11 Episode 16 (S11E16) - 46
Top secret story lines? Uh, I'll sign for it.
Recap of The Simpsons Season 11 Episode 16 (S11E16) - 47
Then I get in a skydiving accident and have to be rushed to the graveyard!
Recap of The Simpsons Season 11 Episode 16 (S11E16) - 48
Well, if they're gonna stomp on my dreams...
Recap of The Simpsons Season 11 Episode 16 (S11E16) - 49
Well, how can I say no to such a captivating-
Recap of The Simpsons Season 11 Episode 16 (S11E16) - 50
And what do you have to tell us, O angel of the future?
Aired 24 years ago - Feb 20, 2000

When Homer fails to give money he promised over the phone, he is forced by PBS stars to flee the country. He becomes a missionary on a small tropical island, where he introduces the natives to casino gambling.

Recap of The Simpsons Season 11 Episode 15 (S11E15) - 1
[ Footsteps Echoing ]
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Please- Please! We're only $10,000 away from returning to our show.
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- Dad, you don't have $10,000. - Aw, how they gonna find me?
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[ Screams ] Why did I register with Insta-Trace?
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Hmm? They don't show police chases, do they?
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Well said, Homer. And now for the moment of generosity.
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Okay, fine. We'll go down there, but they're not going to be open.
Recap of The Simpsons Season 11 Episode 15 (S11E15) - 9
Recap of The Simpsons Season 11 Episode 15 (S11E15) - 10
And you thought you could stab your problems away?
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- You die now! - [ Shouts ]
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Sanctuary! Sanctuary!
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Please, help me. I'll do anything. I'll light a candle.
Recap of The Simpsons Season 11 Episode 15 (S11E15) - 14
Just headed down to the dump with these children's letters to God.
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South Pacific? I didn't agree to-
Recap of The Simpsons Season 11 Episode 15 (S11E15) - 16
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So, you said on the phone you had something to tell me?
Recap of The Simpsons Season 11 Episode 15 (S11E15) - 18
No, no. You can even keep in touch with him on this ham radio.
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Ah. Hi there, little fella.
Recap of The Simpsons Season 11 Episode 15 (S11E15) - 20
First of all, forget everything you learned in missionary school.
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I am Q'Toktok, and this is Ak.
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you see in all the geographical magazines?
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I'm gonna call you Lisa Jr.
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- T... V? - You don't have TV?
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[ Echoing ] Hello!
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I just don't think it's funny.
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that you're showing an interest in your fellow man.
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on the English muffin that is these people...
Recap of The Simpsons Season 11 Episode 15 (S11E15) - 32
- [ Croaks ] - [ Giggles ]
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Amy said there are lots of religions. Which is the right one?
Recap of The Simpsons Season 11 Episode 15 (S11E15) - 35
like Barbra Streisand beforeJames Brolin.
Recap of The Simpsons Season 11 Episode 15 (S11E15) - 36
But you don't need a well or a chapel or an immunization center.
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Come on, little friend. Make a wisecrack.
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Well, time to get to work. Mmm.
Recap of The Simpsons Season 11 Episode 15 (S11E15) - 39
- But- - And worst of all...
Recap of The Simpsons Season 11 Episode 15 (S11E15) - 40
this seemed like a strange and frightening place.
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The magic medicine of...
Recap of The Simpsons Season 11 Episode 15 (S11E15) - 42
But if, like me, you're mesmerized by pretty colors and spinning things...
Recap of The Simpsons Season 11 Episode 15 (S11E15) - 43
Now over here I've brewed up my favorite beverage.
Recap of The Simpsons Season 11 Episode 15 (S11E15) - 44
- [ Chattering ] - Okay!
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♪♪ [ Whistling ]
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Huh? What kind of god would allow that?
Recap of The Simpsons Season 11 Episode 15 (S11E15) - 47
Your alcohol and inexpensive buffets have corrupted us.
Recap of The Simpsons Season 11 Episode 15 (S11E15) - 48
[ Groans ]
Recap of The Simpsons Season 11 Episode 15 (S11E15) - 49
Hmm. A night out is a night out.
Recap of The Simpsons Season 11 Episode 15 (S11E15) - 50
Since I got here.
Aired 24 years ago - Feb 13, 2000

Ned's wife Maude is inadvertently killed by a T-shirt accident at an auto race. Homer and his family try to help Ned cope.

Recap of The Simpsons Season 11 Episode 14 (S11E14) - 1
Yeah, I have won a lot of races. It's all thanks to my crew, really.
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Oh, sure, if you want to drive the ''traditional'' way.
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That's very sweet, but we have a full day of hiking planned.
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Helmets, roll bars, caution flags.
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- [ Announcer] Gentlemen, start your engines. - [ Engines Roar]
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The dice! The dice! The dice!
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- [ Cheering ] - Me! Me!
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- Come on! Right here! [ Screams ] - [ Gasping ]
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Well, I guess no one else wants a T-shirt.
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It's hard to believe we're never going to see Maude again.
Recap of The Simpsons Season 11 Episode 14 (S11E14) - 14
Now, Homie, you know, Ned and the boys need us. And you know what that means.
Recap of The Simpsons Season 11 Episode 14 (S11E14) - 15
In many ways, Maude Flanders was a supporting player in our lives.
Recap of The Simpsons Season 11 Episode 14 (S11E14) - 16
And we thought she always would be.
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- Shut up, Kirk! - [ Quickly ] Sorry.
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but I'm getting pretty sick of them and their Bombay attitude!
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- What are you saying? - What? Nothing. She was hot.
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Keep firing! Convert the heathens!
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[ Man ] Second Coming! Reload! Reload!
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[ Chuckles ] That's nice of you, Homer, but I think I'll just go to bed.
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I know. I know. It's never easy.
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Now, now, now. Don't beat yourself up.
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Easy answer, eh?
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I think it's pretty obvious that I don't!
Recap of The Simpsons Season 11 Episode 14 (S11E14) - 31
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-your prayers have been ''Flanswered''. - ## [ Fanfare ]
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- So that's why you maced me. - [ Chuckles ] Yeah.
Recap of The Simpsons Season 11 Episode 14 (S11E14) - 34
He looks like a cuddler, that Ned. I-I like that.
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[ Panting, Grunting ]
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- Did you get that, Bart? - Got it.
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Homer, I'm having second thoughts. This feels so disloyal to Maude.
Recap of The Simpsons Season 11 Episode 14 (S11E14) - 40
If you select me
Recap of The Simpsons Season 11 Episode 14 (S11E14) - 41
- Well, I- - Mine's terrible. Let's talk in August.
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- [ Skinner] Edna, this is childish. - Fine, then hang up.
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Ooh. Foofie doesn't like the sound of that ''maybe.''
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Ah, it's probably me. I'm about as exciting as a baked potato.
Recap of The Simpsons Season 11 Episode 14 (S11E14) - 45
but I've been wondering if your decision to take Maude was, well, wrong.
Recap of The Simpsons Season 11 Episode 14 (S11E14) - 46
which, by the way, was gritty and had that white stuff on it!
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[ Whimpering, Screaming ]
Recap of The Simpsons Season 11 Episode 14 (S11E14) - 48
So get down and put your knees together for the Christian rock stylings of...
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Oh, my gosh. Some dropouts must have overpowered the reverend.
Recap of The Simpsons Season 11 Episode 14 (S11E14) - 50
-#And thinking 'bout the wrong turns that I took # -[ Snoring ]
Aired 24 years ago - Feb 06, 2000

Homer and Bart befriend a diving horse at a county fair. They turn it into a racehorse with an attitude, whose success runs them afoul of mysterious, tree-dwelling jockeys.

Recap of The Simpsons Season 11 Episode 13 (S11E13) - 1
I can't wait to do some shopping.
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- [ Cheering ] - A little late for Lenny.
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- Hello. Springfield! - [ Crowd Cheering ]
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♪Take the 8:1 5 into the city ♪
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- Whoo! - ## [ Ends ]
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- ## [ Ends ] - [ Applause ]
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Well. unless there's another band. I think we have a winner.
Recap of The Simpsons Season 11 Episode 13 (S11E13) - 10
- ## [ Ends ] - [ Applause]
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red. white and blew us all away!
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but now I'm just going to be sick.
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- State unfair. - Zing!
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- [ Shrieking Continues ] - [ Cheering Continues ]
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[ Tires Screech ]
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Look. I just want the horse to have a good home or be food.
Recap of The Simpsons Season 11 Episode 13 (S11E13) - 18
and the expense forced Homer to work at the Kwik-E-Mart with hilarious consequences.
Recap of The Simpsons Season 11 Episode 13 (S11E13) - 19
It's going to cost us $500 a week to keep Duncan.
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Marge. your pro-mop/anti-horse agenda has been clear for some time.
Recap of The Simpsons Season 11 Episode 13 (S11E13) - 21
Pearls. eh?
Recap of The Simpsons Season 11 Episode 13 (S11E13) - 22
[ Laughing Continues ]
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As a fellow sax player. I'm sure he'll be outraged.
Recap of The Simpsons Season 11 Episode 13 (S11E13) - 24
I wonder what would happen if they had a baby.
Recap of The Simpsons Season 11 Episode 13 (S11E13) - 25
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- [ Air Horn Blares ] - [ Horses Whinny ]
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He ran all the way here.
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[ Blusters ]
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It's Chock Full O' Drugs. followed closely by Stalker. with Old Levis fading fast.
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Would you look at this? The straggler. Duncan...
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Cheer up. Son.
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Well. he's not gonna be intimidated anymore.
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Lisa. you've got to learn that life isn't always fair.
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- [ Whinnies ] - so show him some latitude. and you'll win his gratitude.
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- Get bent. - [ Both Gasp ]
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Ooh. he looks scary.
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Okay. Lisa. I've got Furious D across the board...
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- 'cause Furious D is closing like a horse possessed. - [ Grunts ]
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- Guff? - I mean sh-
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#He's going the distance #
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I've been waitin' all my life to hear that.
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[ High-pitched Laughter]
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[ All ] Freaks. Freaks. Freaks.
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♪Just lose the stinkin' race ♪
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Did that really happen. or was it just a wonderful dream?
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Maybe. But if Duncan wins the derby. he can spend the rest of his days as a stud.
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the fifth and penultimate duel of racing's Triple Crown.
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likeJames Madison or Oscar winner Linda Hunt.
Aired 24 years ago - Jan 23, 2000

Worried about his health, Mr. Burns visits the Mayo Clinic. He lets Homer housesit his mansion, which leads of course to an offshore knife fight and an attack by Chinese pirates.

Recap of The Simpsons Season 11 Episode 12 (S11E12) - 1
And that's why our final award honors a man...
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[ Scattered Murmuring ] Hey! Not bad!
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Off a tall building- That's a great way to do it!
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- [ Groaning ] - [Audience Exclaiming]
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Ninety.
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[ Straining ] Boy, he didn't want to let go of that!
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to the-"
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Nothing you can say will diminish this honor. [ Groaning ]
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I 'm taking you to the Mayo Clinic in Minnesota.
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Now, if the house catches fire...
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Aa-aahh-ohh! Oof!.
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- Heh-heh! [ Gasps ] - Hmm. Seems a little wasteful.
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Wow. He's got every Nancy Drew...
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I 'm drunk! [ Slurred Groan ]
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Naught-naught-naught, naught-naught, naught-naught-naught-two.
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This all seems a little elaborate for sloppy joes. Hmm.
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Man, this is livin'.
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Homer, did you jimmy open Mr. Burns' liquor cabinet?.
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Not you, not its rightful owner, not anybody.
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- Homer, who are you calling?. - Everybody! I found Burnsie's address book.
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That's some language you got there. And you talk like that 24-7, huh?.
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Party?. No! No parties!
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every disease on this chart.
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- Come on. Keep blowing. - [ Panicked Yelping ]
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Now, you know I can't sell you no beer till 2:00 p.m. on account of it's Sunday.
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- What's that, a theme park?. - No, the ocean.
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Oh, Homie. I don't care if you're a billionaire. I love you just because you're-
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[ Passengers Cheering ]
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Homer, have we hit international waters yet?. Because, uh, things are gettin' real ugly.
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Wow! You can do anything out here.
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[ Mooing ]
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Well, Doc, I think I did pretty well on my tests.
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You also have several diseases that have just been discovered- in you.
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Here is the door to your body. You see?. And these are oversized novelty germs.
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Oh, no, no. In fact, even a slight breeze could-
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They'll never know the simple joys of a monkey knife fight.
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[ Man, Amplified Voice ] We can't hear you! Come 300 feet closer!
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Come on, Bart! The Coast Guard's covering the "Doo"!
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Looks like another homosexual party boat.
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- # Oh, China Grove ## - Huh?. [ Laughing ]
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So far, the nook is relatively- [ Yelling ] Oh, no! No, it isn't!
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Navy SEALs are on the way.
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- Enough! Get in the net. - I don't want to!
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Aa-aah! Aah! My mouth! I, eh-
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Eh, you didn't miss much. Honeydew is the money melon.
Aired 24 years ago - Jan 16, 2000

Homer gets a bucket stuck on his head, and when it is removed the town is convinced that Bart has the powers of a faith healer. Then mobster Fat Tony tries to turn the boy's spiritual abilities into more sinister directions.

Recap of The Simpsons Season 11 Episode 11 (S11E11) - 1
- [ Applauding ] - Yes. Thank you, Anton.
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You should do it with bold red letters.
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I think I know that guy. He ran over the dean five years ago. Punch up that picture.
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this bucket of super glue is gonna drop right on his head.
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[ Shouts, Grunts ]
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[ Sobbing ] Oh, there's no such thing.
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[ Growling ]
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Easy. Easy. Too far.
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- Mmm. Can you feel the power? - [ All ] Yes!
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♪ Now let's hear it for the Holy Spirit ♪
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- What ails you, my son? - I done ''spraint'' my elbow bone...
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- [ Mumbling ] - Come again?
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Hey, I got my comedy K's back.
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Oh. My, Satan really jammed that thing on good.
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Now proclaim, ''I have the power.''
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[ All Shouting ]
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Excuse me, Brother Faith.
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My slingshot was my cross. But I saw the light and changed my wicked ways.
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Then I said, ''I have the power.'' And the bucket came off.
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- You did it, Bart. - He really does have the power.
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The bucket came off Dad's head because the bright lights heated it...
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In his letter to the Corinthians...
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Hey, I'm doing the best with the material I have.
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- ## [ Beatboxing ] - [ All Cheering ]
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That exterminator tent will be perfect for your revival meeting.
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But, uh, did you have to salt the earth so nothing would ever grow again?
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Then put your souls together for Brother... Bart.
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♪ He took a whiz Oh, yes, he did ♪
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- #Testify # - #Testify #
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- # Michael, row- row- Row the boat # - [ Feedback ]
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♪ So raise your voice and don't be shy ♪
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♪ Now I see with total precision ♪
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- And I think there was some food on the fork. - Ew.
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Could you tell my mom I'm here?
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Springfield Stadium has caught additional seating capacity fever. [ Grunts ]
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Whoa, Nellie. We have ourselves a barn burner here today.
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Do we have any food that wasn't brutally slaughtered?
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Oh, you just know what everyone should do, don't you, Marge?
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- If they don't have tabbouleh, what's your second choice? - They'll have tabbouleh.
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♪ I've had ♪
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- And what's this? - [ Vehicle Backfiring ]
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- [ Screams ] - [ Gasps ] He hit the star player.
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No, wait. I got a kid who's a miracle worker. He'll heal him up real good.
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[ Clears Throat ]
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But you can always fall back on your degree in... Communications?
Aired 24 years ago - Jan 09, 2000

When Marge leaves the house to recuperate from a skating injury, everything goes to hell - until Lisa convinces Homer and Bart they have leprosy.

Recap of The Simpsons Season 11 Episode 10 (S11E10) - 1
[Tires Squealing]
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Oh, that was scary.
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You guys never use any of this stuff. Look at these.
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Okay, here it comes. Keep your eyes on the chair.
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This chair lift sure goes high
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Whoo!. Colostomizer!.
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Must wash eyes!
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- [ Bone Cracks ] - Ow! My leg! This is the worst pain ever!
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[ Chuckles ] Those deer?.
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Excellent. Your lingo is progressing nicely.
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- Is this seat taken?. - Uh, I think that's an armrest.
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Back away, not today Disco lady
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- [ Both Panting ] - Oh, man. Another clock accident.
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Uh, better than that. Perfect.
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Well, as you can see, it's a compound fracture.
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And don't worry. All the laundry and dirty dishes will be there when you get back.
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I want you to get married on that someday.
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Good Lord Your are wasting thousands of dollar worth of interferon
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Don't tell me Mom dresses you.
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Practice. Practice. Okay, here we go.
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See, there it is. But that was a practice. The system worked.
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- It unraveled on a nail. - That's not true. He left it on the bus.
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- [ Growls ] - Here you go.
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Maple soda?. A cell phone full of candy?.
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There's a little girl here who had too many sour balls.
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Leg?. Oh! Oh, that. It's pretty great.
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- I really thought I could handle this, but- - I think so too. Bye.
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Will you guys turn that thing down?.
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- Lucy?. - Lucy McGillicuddy Ricardo Carmichael.
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You mean like when you hid inside the conga drum to scare Ricky?.
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[ Snoring ]
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- [ Homer] Lisa, help! - [ Both Screaming ]
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Welcome to Virtual Doctor.
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You've got leprosy.
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Leprosy! I can't believe it! That fortune cookie was right!
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At Sunday school, they said the lepers were cured by some bearded dude.
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Oh, those poor souls. What's the Christian thing to do?.
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Todd, no!
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Code blue! A thousand c.c.'s of leg wax! Stat!
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Anyway, you don't think he could be at another bar, do you?.
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Hansen's disease. You know, like that horrible cream soda.
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Cost us a bundle too. I guess we'll have an imagination Christmas this year.
Aired 24 years ago - Dec 19, 1999

In this Christmas-themed episode, the students of Springfield Elementary are unwittingly used as a focus group to test new toys. The product of their labors, a cuddly doll named Funzo, is a lot more sinister than he appears.

Recap of The Simpsons Season 11 Episode 9 (S11E09) - 1
[ All Laughing ]
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which is why I equipped the seat of your cast with a viewing window.
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How did those trucks get here so fast?
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Thank you. To inaugurate our ramp system...
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[ Grumbles ]
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Oh, you're cheering now. But someday you'll-
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[ Groans ] People, these are all good ideas-
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Uh, well, maybe we can pry open his wallet with a slick, professional pitch.
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Too bad I'm an idiot 'cause my school closed. Oh, well.
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[ Imitating Siren Wailing ]
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[ Man Announcing ] We now return to Dónde Está Justice.
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Hey, our school's on TV.
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Will you be replacing the current teachers and administrators?
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That's why it failed, right? Well, we're not gonna make you memorize facts and dates.
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Hey, I'm here to make sure that you get a kick out of education.
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Bart broke all my books.
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Vroom, vroom, vroom!
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[ ''Pop Goes The Weasel'' Intro Repeating ]
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- It should never stop dancing. - [ Martin ] It should need accessories.
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- Fun? - Ralph, there are no right or wrong answers...
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- Lisa, are you doing math? - Uh,just a few Venn diagrams.
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Alls I know is I'm gettin' straight A's, and that ain't not bad.
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where we open the door and everything's normal...
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I don't understand. I could swear it was right here.
Recap of The Simpsons Season 11 Episode 9 (S11E09) - 32
- Beck- - ?? [ Hip-hop Drumbeat ]
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- Funzo's soft and cuddly. - With lots of firepower.
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- Aren't you outraged? - No.
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Three prawns are hardly a galaxy.
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That is so adorable. You're rehired.
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And thanks to you, Funzo is the first doll designed by children...
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Funzo's Lower Back Pain Chair...
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I admit it's kind of cute. But it'll never take the place of Malibu Stacy.
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They must have programmed it to eliminate the competition.
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I have a flower for 'ou.
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I'd still sleep a little easier if I saw some trampling.
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You're just gonna break into everyone's house and steal their favorite toy.
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Joy to the world The Lord is come ?
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- [ Loud Crash ] - [ Singing Louder] ? Holy night ?
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Writhing Funzos in my sack
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I'm very mad at 'ou. [ Groans ]
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Aired 24 years ago - Nov 28, 1999

After winning a motorcycle at a dance contest, Homer becomes part of a motorcycle gang. But when he puts Marge's photo in a biker magazine, a much tougher gang takes her, and he must win her back.

Recap of The Simpsons Season 11 Episode 8 (S11E08) - 1
Hmm. Hmm?. Wow! Look at this old-timey gizmo.
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Oh, my throat doctor says I'm not supposed to do that anymore.
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Harley-Davidson motorcycle,
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You gotta be crazy if you want to get in
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Whoa!
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- Whoo-whoo! - [ Cheering ]
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Well, that dream is over. At least we still have each other. Right, honey?.
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Man, you're bending the hell out of that kickstand, Dad.
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You gave me the courage to spread my newborn wings
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And my father too
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- [ Groans ] It's like a chainsaw in my head! - [ Motorcycle Engine Revving]
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- [ Grunts ] - Thankyou, Nelson.
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[Motorcycle Engine Idling]
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Look what you've done to beautiful display!
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- Yeah, we know. - Hey, Homer! Can I join?.
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The first meeting of Hell's Satans is called to order.
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I'm the president, and the decision is mine.
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You can lock us away, but you'll never defeat the Cobras.
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Oh, how can I be down a thousand bucks?.
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I know this is not your way. But we're in America now.
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Well, if you'd been awake, you would've said no! You can see the bind I was in.
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Whoo!
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According to our bylaws, we gotta stompyou.
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Hey, hey! Chew with your mouth closed, please.
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You keep it.
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[ Groans ]
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Well, uh, be that as it may...
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If you want some food, I'll be happy to make you some breakfast.
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Hey, this is a lot better than that rancid filth we find in the Dumpsters.
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- I tried spitting at it, you know, but- -Just put it on my sewing pile.
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No, we're not!
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and they ran away like schoolgirls with their tails between their legs.
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- Really?. Read it. - Hmm.
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Oh, don't worry. You're completely safe.
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Yeah, come on
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[ Groaning ] What the- Mmm.
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[ Together] Huh?.
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Oh, man. To get all that, you'd have to kill, like, 50 people.
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Said they were gonna spend the night at Crystal Lake Campground...
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Uh, Miss Simpson, I killed my pencil.
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Civilized people solve their disputes with words.
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- Homer. Homer, stop it. - [ Grunting ]
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You and me in the circle of death.
Aired 24 years ago - Nov 21, 1999

Due to overuse of fertility medication, Apu and wife Manjula give birth to octuplets. Desperate for money, Apu loans the babies to an unscrupulous carny promoter, then needs Homer's help to get them back.

Recap of The Simpsons Season 11 Episode 7 (S11E07) - 1
- [ Laughing, Blowing ] - [ Laughs ]
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You know, I do. I mean, there comes a time in a man's life...
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By chilling my loins, I increase the chances of impregnating my wife.
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Um, how 'bout one not touching your ass?
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- [ Gasps ] - [ Both ] Baby. Baby.
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So, how's the tribe coming along? Any papooses?
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Oh! Homer, we have tried everything-
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Now, this situation is guaranteed to end in pregnancy.
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And you have that scholarship to Ivy League State.''
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And that's my cue to exit.
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[ Both ] Baby.
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Man, the last nine months sure were crazy.
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Of course I do, sweetheart.
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Cleanup in aisle three.
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Oh, my sweet husband.
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It rolls off your tongue and into your heart- ''octuplets.''
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Apu, say hello to Punam, Sashi, Pria...
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I slipped fertility drugs into your breakfast Squishy.
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Would you say you and your babies have a ''love eight'' relationship?
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is more suited to, say, a possum than a human being?
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Free baby cola!
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How do you feel about this avalanche of free merchandise?
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where a local woman has just given birth to nine-
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Nonuplets? Now that's something you don't see every day.
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We don't need corporate handouts.
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Apu, it's 4:00 a.m. You're late for work!
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- [ Door Sensor Rings ] - Well, morning, Apu. How are the little blessings?
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I can't believe you don't shut up.
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- You were saying? - Apu told me all eight babies have colic.
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Hmm.
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Oh, hallelujah. Our problems are solved. We have banana bread.
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Apu, they're doing it again.
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- As a token of forgiveness, please take this baby. - Mmm.
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What if your babies could live in a place...
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I dare you to look at a kangaroo and not laugh.
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And being in the public eye didn't mess me up one bit.
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But what does make sense is putting your children in the hands of Mr. Kidkill here.
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Hmm.
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[ Cooing ]
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Yeah. Nothing's too good for my little angels.
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Yeah, but now their umbilical cords have fallen off.
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Say hello to the baddest baby in the whole damn town-Animal.
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[ Sighs ]
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- And the rest. R-O-C-Kin the U.S.A.
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Work with Dazzle. She's a lox out there.
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Well, they might give Dazzle back.
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Aired 24 years ago - Nov 14, 1999

Homer bowls a perfect 300 game, then concludes that the greatest accomplishment of his life is behind him. He reconnects with the world by bonding with baby Maggie.

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[Whimpering, Panting ]
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- [ Grunts, Gags ] - [ Grunting ]
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Yeah. And even a teaspoon could cause a fatal tumor.
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The cooling tank just blew, and they're taking Lenny to the hospital.
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[ Both ] Not Lenny!
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Hey, guys. Is it normal to see Burns's face on a bowling ball?.
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[ Machinery Rattling ]
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Miss! Miss! Sorry. I Was callin' the Waitress.
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We knew it contained spider eggs...
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where local pinhead, Homer Simpson, is on the verge of a perfect game!
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[ Disgusted Sigh ] Morons.
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so we'll just stay here and not disturb him.
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- Yea! Yea! - [ Chuckling ] What's wrong, Abe?.
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- Homer! Homer! - Thankyou. Thankyou.
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[ All ] Yea!
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and until last week they were dead right.
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Do you think I could grow up to be a doctor?.
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[ Man Announcing] Live frrom Shelbbyville, it's The Springfield Squares...
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Disco Stu's gonna groove up some dough playing tic-tac-toe.
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Uh, do I read from the sheet labeled "jokes" or "answers"?.
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Now, before my partner Teller hits the shark-infested water...
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You idiot! You'll ruin everything!
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No, it isn't. Don't leave me alone with him!
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You're special.
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Burt Reynolds apologized to the pope and promised to replace the windshield.
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- Homer! - But she said I-
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Sweet Bowling alley Balloon
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Well, the one sure cure for the blues is to talk it over with your life partner.
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Save 'em in a shot glass for someone who still has a shred of hope.
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[ Bell Dings ]
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- Yeah, less chat, more splat, pal! - [ Gasps ]
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I guess you had some higher purpose in mind.
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That's great. Even big stars take their kids to the zoo.
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Oh, well, look. Here's some money.
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No need, Dad. Over the years, I've learned to find father figures wherever I can.
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[ Babbling ]
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Let's see what's on tummy-vision.
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- D'oh! - [ Whistle Blows ]
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it has barracudas and moray eels.
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I know. If l sink to the bottom, I can run to the shore.
Aired 24 years ago - Nov 07, 1999

Fleeing from a duel, Homer takes his family to live on a farm. There he discovers that by mixing tomatoes, tobacco and radioactivity from the nuclear plant, he can create a dangerously delicious new substance.

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Sir, I demand satisfaction.
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I, King Arthur, declare Zorro the new king of England!
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- [ Chattering ] - Oh, move it, Q-tip! Ha!
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Bye!
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- Mother, please! You're embarrassing me. - No, I'm not.
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And I owe it all to a little glove slap.
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[ Man Singing ] # A glove slap, baby #
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[ Man ] ''Suh, ''your challenge is accepted.
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The National Weather Service says dawn is still scheduled for 6:20 tomorrow...
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[ Yelping, Gasping ]
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Why don't you have the colonel's wife save you?
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No, no, no, no. You'll get sap on your dueling blouse.
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And somebody wanted to get rid of it in April.
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Aw, screw it.
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I'm sorry. These are for the truly needy.
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'Cause I'm trying to think!
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fresh country air, apples for the picking, sing-along hay rides.
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[ Laughing ] Whoo!
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Oh, yeah, you little scamp!
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All right. Let's see what the old girl can do.
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Well, well. Look at the city slicker pulling up in his fancy German car.
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You're not gonna grow nothin' on the old Simpson place.
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- I'm down. - Pa!
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- Time to harvest, boys! - [ All ] Whoo!
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Here, have an ear on me.
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Oh, you're right! [ Sobbing ] I'm a coward!
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Yeah, I guess you're right. It's not.
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[ Homer] Well, Marge, have you ever seen a field glow like that?
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- Where'd you get that? - From the producers of Waiting to Exhale.
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- [ Groans ] But it's only been one night. - That's all it takes.
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Brace yourselves, everybody. You're about to see the hugest,juiciest...
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Something is growing.
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Maybe the tomato seeds crossbred with the tobacco seeds.
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Addictive, eh?
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Excuse me, Mr. Farmer Man.
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- [ Groans ] Holy Moses! It does taste like Grandma! - I want more!
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- I was here first. - Come on, come on, people!
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Meet the Laramie Cigarette team. This is Mindy,J.P. and Emil.
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- How much? - Well, let's say a hundred-
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They make billions off the suffering and deaths of others.
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They'll be back. We control the world's supply of tomacco...
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- Look! A flying saucer! - Hmm?
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- I wouldn't know where to begin. -Just burn that plant right now and end this madness!
Aired 24 years ago - Oct 31, 1999

In "I Know What You Diddily-Iddly-Did" the SImpsons fear they have killed Ned Flanders. "Desperately Xeeking Xena" satirizes superheroes of yore with "Stretch Dude" Bart and "Clobber Girl" Lisa. And "Life's A Glitch, Then You Die" depicts the upcoming horror of Y2K.

Recap of The Simpsons Season 11 Episode 4 (S11E04) - 1
[ Bell Ringing]
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When I think about Ned, I can't help but remember the look on his face when Marge drove over-
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We'll miss you, buddy.
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[ Marge ] Someone saw us!
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And I'll go skinny-dipping in that lake...
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Oh, I wish! You see, that night when you hit me with your car-
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♪ Guess I forgot to put the fog lights in ♪
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- [ Roars ] - Hey, foamy. I want the news, not the weather.
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[ Gasps ]
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Safe. Safe.
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Get in there, you stupid pillowcase!
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She's been crushed. And so have the hopes of our Mathletics team.
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Look at me! Ow! Hot, hot, hot.
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Bart, with these powers, we can become superheroes.
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Yes. Over here. [ Stammering ]
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I see. All right. Yes. But in Episode AG4-
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[ Grunting ] Must remove my breastplate.
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Oh, dear God!
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Remember. You're vulnerable to Kryptonite!
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near-mint condition between Doctor Who and, of course, Yasmine Bleeth.
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It was fired only once.. to keep William Shatner from making another album.
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- [ Groans ] - Nah, nah!
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While we're waiting, here are some names you may call me on our wedding night.
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Well, I mean, maybe we are meant for each other.
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- [ Shouting ] - Oh! Ow. Ow. That hurts.
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from Star Wars Episode I: The Phantom Menace.
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Must end life in classic Lorne Greene pose...
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- I told you. I'm not Xena. I'm Lucy Lawless. - Oh.
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♪♪[ TV.: Funk]
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Weren't you the plant's Y2K compliance officer?.
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We want to thank Dixie brand mayonnaise. Whoo, Lordy, what a mayonnaise!
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[ Electricity Crackling ]
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Well, those ivory-tower eggheads have screwed us again. [ Chuckles ]
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- [ Whimpering ] - [ Man Whimpering ]
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But it's not too late to repent your sins and be embraced by the Almighty.
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[ All Shouting ]
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- Oh, no. Krusty! - [ Groaning ]
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They're evacuating the Earth. [ Gasps ] We're saved!
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[ Homer] Just like the dead clown promised!
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the, uh, piano genius from the movie Shine.
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- You're only allowed to take one parent with you. - Mom.
Aired 24 years ago - Oct 24, 1999

With Lisa's help, Homer uses his vast knowledge of food to become the town's leading restaurant critic. But when he gets petty and vindictive in his criticisms, all the other chefs in town try to kill him.

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established in 1883.
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to become Springfield's number-one newspaper.
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[ Chuckling ] All right. I'm dancin'!
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My advice is to free us or let us die!
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each copy contains a certain percentage of recycled paper.
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Oh, that's nothing. He can hear pudding.
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I like pizza, I like bagels
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We're looking for a new food critic...
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Thanks for the chance. You won't never regret this, Mr. Editing Guy.
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Earl- No! Bill Simpson!
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Well, you keep using words like ''pasghetti'' and ''momatoes.''
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No, no! You're right! It's a joke! [ Chuckles ]
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I'll help you write a new review if you'll just let me use the bathroom!
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- The food is delicious. - [ Gasps ] That's brilliant.
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- Uh, I don't think so. - We make a good team.
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We're gonna run this on page one...
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- Where is Uter? - We just want closure.
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Welcome to Planet Springfield...
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- Hey, Homer, come here. - [ Gasps ]
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Homer! This is our theater critic, Daphne Beaumont.
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Listen, we've been meaning to have a talk with you about your reviews.
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[ Clears Throat ] We see ''John Deere has come out with this year's line of rototillers.
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Hmm. This pea soup is as weak as the acting and nowhere near as hammy.
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Oh, I got one! How do you make a King Lear? Put the queen in a bikini!
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Hmm. I seem to be missing a piece of my ear. Touché.
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special time in a boy's life when-
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Not anymore. I don't wanna be partners with a man who thinks like that.
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The food at the Gilded Truffle really, uh-What's a good word?
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Next week is the Taste of Springfield Festival.
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articles about Chronic Fatigue Syndrome- you know, chick crap.
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Then why did you put yours in the window?
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I've seen this man eat a bowl of change.
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But Homer Simpson will find the real thing...
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Homie, my woman's intuition's acting up.
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Oh.
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Homer's unfastened the top button on his pants.
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The giant éclair will knock Homer off the food page...
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Aired 24 years ago - Oct 03, 1999

When Bart commits an extremely destructive prank, he is given Focusyn, a pill to help him concentrate in school. At first the results are impressive, and then Bart starts believing in a conspiracy involving spy satellites and major league baseball.

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[ Chuckling ] That's for Clydes, baby.
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It's not workin'! It just spreads the flame!
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[ Grunting ]
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[ Groans ] My sport goggles!
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And turning to the 3-D map, we see an unmistakable cone of ignorance.
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- I'm afraid I'll have to expel your son- - [ Gasps ]
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I'd say he's coming out of the pep closet. [ Chuckles ]
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- [ All Squealing ] - Now I'll give them some Focusyn.
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But it's not about slavery. It's about helping kids concentrate.
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[ Groans ] How will we get Bart to take these?
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Why don't you just come down and have some taffy?
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Does Mr. Simpson have a demon, Daddy?
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- Oh, grow up. - Yeah.
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- Ooh! - That's rough.
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- I wanna see 'em! I wanna see 'em! - [ Voices Overlapping ]
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I am feeling an urge to straighten up and fly right.
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- [ Laughter] - Hey, what's goin' on?
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Bart! Bart! Krusty just fired his associate producer.
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Before, my energy was all over the place.
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- ''Memo to self: Shut up, Lisa.'' - [ Shouts ]
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No, but here's a book called Chicken Soup for the Loser...
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He organized all the lawsuits against me into one class action.
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- [ Computerized Voice Speaking Foreign Language ] - And look at this!
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Can you believe it? And he's even tutoring a little Navajo boy.
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Bart's so well-behaved now.
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I think you misheard me.
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I thought you'd like it. And I'm enjoying the friendship...
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Well, sure, if it's true.
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Gotta finish. [ Grunting ]
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Who else? Major League Baseball.
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I understand the electrodes, but why does he have to be on a treadmill?
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- I think we should take him off the drug. - Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa!
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I need every brain cell blazing to outwit my invisible enemies.
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Uh-oh! Somebody's gonna have a tummy ache.
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Oh, my little guy's out there in the hot sun without his sombrero.
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I can't believe that Sarge said we're the worst bunch he's ever seen
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Don't stop thinking about tomorrow
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Egad! A maniac cutting a swath of destruction!
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Lobsweat, Hoohah,Jitters, Sir Wide Bottom!
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- Wow. Praise from Caesar. - Huh?
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What a day! First, the drinking fountain squirts me, and now this.
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Oh, thank you for stopping the tank.
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Aired 24 years ago - Sep 26, 1999

Homer befriends Mel Gibson just as Mel is completing a remake of Mr. Smith Goes To Washington. Homer convinces Mel to make the film more violent, with disastrous results.

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That hardly seems worth destroying a car,
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Besides, it's not just his chiseled good looks,
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I will now!
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[ Cheering ]
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[ Continues Laughing ]
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- We then take your cards to Hollywood, California! - [ All Gasping ]
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No, Sorry, but like all celebrities, he's in Hollywood,,,
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He deliberately waited till we were in the air to ask me,
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[ Chuckles ] Oh, Robin, you've got to see the director's cut of Booty Call. It's fabulous!
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It's not boring, He's passionate about government,
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instead of bullets and chasing,
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Look! It's Mel Gibson! Hey, everybody, rush over there!
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Honesty is the foundation of the movie business,
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- Hey, Gibson! -Yes, sir?,
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Bumblebee Man says "Muybueno. " And we were worried about the Latino market, huh?,
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Maybe, Maybe he's the only person with the guts to tell me the truth,
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- [ Doorbell Rings ] - Door, Marge,
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Listen, Gibson, I'm tired of Hollywood pretty boys like you,,,
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Marge, did you hear that?, Mel Gibson wants my help! Mel Gibson!
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The problem I have is people love me so much they never criticize me,
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I didn't say "hello,"
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A minivan! Oh, boy, you celebrities sure know how to live,
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I hear all the stars eat at a place called Planet Hollywood,
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If he doesn't play ball, we'll teach him a thing or two, See ya,
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All you have to do is show him doing this-
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And it was fine for the 1 930s,
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Hmm, I guess it is a little flat, Okay, Let's reshoot the ending,
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- [ Both ] We're lesbians! - [ Dog Howls ]
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- Roll it, Louie! - [Projector Whirring]
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- [ Murmuring ] - I believe the senator has yielded the floor,
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I second that motion, with a vengeance!
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Mr., Smith, this is highly unorthodox,
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- Pretty cool, huh?, - You, uh-
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Ew! Those movies sucked, I only saw them to get Marge into the sack,
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Do the words "executive producer" mean anything to you?,
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- There's no- - Oink!
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- Give us the film! - Never!
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- [ Shouting ] - Watch out! Coming through!
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- How old are you anyway?, -Well, I've been told I can play anywhere from 28 to-
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Wow! These dummies look pretty good,
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Before Lethal Weapon 2, I never thought there could be a bomb in my toilet,
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