Aired 17 years ago - May 20, 2007
When Homer buys the 1,000,000th ice-cream cone at a local shop, he ends up on Kent Brockman's news program. When Brockman swears on live TV after coffee is spilled in his lap, Ned Flanders leads a crusade to clean up Springfield's airwaves, starting with getting Brockman fired. Then Homer once again saves the day.
Marge Simpson, I just heard the
most delicious piece of gossip.
Hey, suckers,
check it out.
Absolutely.
All the time.
I know, but a breeze from the window
went in my mouth.
This is just a routine checkup!
The U.S. dental association
presents:
"Ongoing periodontal problems. "
Dirty, dirty mouth, y'all.
- I have a right to my views.
- No! I mean Chris "Ludacris" Bridges,
Just lie completely at ease
while I administer the nitrous.
I like that, but I'm on
a bit of a health kick.
All right, let's just get through this.
- What'd I miss?
- Kent Brockman said a horrible swear.
Where's the hammer?
to charities that fight teen cursing.
Good night.
Farewell, dinosaur.
"dingle-dangle,"
"Boston marriage,"
You mean there are losers who spend all day
watching TV looking for stuff to complain about?
60 Minutes... Morley Safer has
questionable pants fold.
Oh, that hurt like a...
to pressure a government with better
things to do to punish a man who meant
a full inquiry into garbage-tongued
anchorman Kent.... Brockman?!
It's a glorious day here in Springfield.
Light winds, low humidity.
for Kent Brockman's
shameful swear-nami.
I'm a cat walking down
the street, swinging my arms.
That's what you get for, uh, I don't know,
messing with my wife. And it goes on.
- Kent, can we talk?
- I'm not fired, am I?
as a member of the liberal media.
He wouldn't be in this mess
if you hadn't dumped coffee on his lap.
Ladies, check out what I can do
with the oxygen masks.
Liberals... I hate them so much.
Aired 17 years ago - May 20, 2007
When finding out Jimbo, Dolph, and Kearney plan on sabotaging Springfield Elementary School's annual bake sale by releasing the "ultimate stinkbomb" (a rotten yogurt cup from Springfield's Nuclear Power Plant), Bart and Lisa enlist the help of Jack
Bauer and Chloe O'Brian. Meanwhile, Marge attempts to make the perfect cake, so she can win the bake sale.
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Let's spit
in the coffee pots.
I already read it.
for all pranks past
and future,
the annual bake sale provides
90% of the school's funding.
Do you prefer Schwinn or Huffy?
Lisa, they're going to put
a stink bomb in the school.
A very special boy.
Disappeared into Afghanistan
in the late 90s.
1,200 degrees.
Still, I wouldn't describe
it as unpleasant.
We are projecting an
effective stink radius
and Superintendent Chalmers
won't be happy to hear...
Will do, and you chose
the perfect person.
o/~ Skip, skip,
skip to my Lou... o/~
I'm unclear on what you want!
Lisa, are you
on a secure line?
Okay, I kept my end of the deal.
Smell you later.
Don't worry, it's not too moist.
and I know he's not.
My God.
This is going on
your permanent record.
Aired 17 years ago - May 13, 2007
Homer unwittingly drags the family into a cornfield maze after attempting to leave a boring Harvest fest that Marge brought them to. When everyone except Homer escapes, Santa's Little Helper rescues him and becomes the town hero. So the Simpsons enroll him in Police Dog Academy where he's teamed with Lou.
Dad, we're in the maze.
Witch's coven.
I can make it on my own!
Now there must be a way out!
I'm so sick of being lost.
keep happening to me?
I'm lost and I'm starving!
Chief, I'm afraid Officer Jaws is guilty of littering...
Santa's Little Helper
would be an awesome police dog.
Now, transform.
Well, I guess Wednesday everybody's going to be thinking
Bring in the next group.
Keep your noses clean and your hearts free of worms.
Easy there, pal.
We just started our shift.
Oh, you know it.
I can make you huge.
No!
because of this improperly
filled-out police report,
Relax for a couple
days with your family.
then he can get a nonviolent
job like barking songs
Oh, I have a friend
who would love him.
I want my old dog.
The one who bit me.
I already love him
more than I love Lisa.
to Mussorgsky's immortal
Pictures at an Exhibition.
Hey, don't ask me to show
if you can't handle the tell.
The snake's getting away!
Lou, he's got to get over it.
so I can dump all over that?
Aired 17 years ago - May 06, 2007
Maggie goes on a path of destruction in the Simpsons home after Marge follows advice in a parenting magazine and throws away her pacifier. Marge finally gives in and sends Homer to get Maggie a new pacifier, but when he cant find the right brand,
Maggie comes up with her own substitute an especially squeaky dog toy. Homer cant sleep through the toys incessant squeaking and is driven to take sleeping pills, which turn him into a sleepwalker with a penchant for mischief. When one of Homers sleepwalking schemes leaves the entire Springfield Fire Department debilitated in the hospital, Homer and some of his fellow Springfieldians become volunteer firefighters. They extinguish several fires and are rewarded with gifts, but when the gifts stop coming, they seek other forms of compensation for their heroic acts.
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Thank you, methasorbizone tartrate,
And someone used our videotapes as dominoes.
I'd be wearing my special domino-setting-up kneepads.
Mood swings?!
So you're the one behind all these hijinks
like 80% of America
and perpetrate my nocturnal mischief.
Whoa! Your dad's a zombie?
What the...?! My car?!
Oh, my God, what have I done?!
Sir, how does it feel knowing
Just call me Fireman Skinner.
and this pamphlet that came with the fire extinguisher
Oh, I can't wait for my first fire.
Soggy, smoky hero.
Your jaws ofare superior
to my movie Jaws of Life.
I Shoot Your Face,
I Shoot Your Face Again,
- After all, we're volunteers.
- That's right, 'Pu.
Boola, boola, boola, boola...
Thank you, and good-bye.
Burns stiffed us !
And it's our duty to follow it.
a lot of your merchandise
was completely vaporized:
You better not be thinking
of ratting us out.
...exploitation...
Aired 17 years ago - Apr 29, 2007
Bart becomes a hometown hero when he makes the game-winning catch at his Little League game, sending the Springfield Isotots to the championship for the very first time. Meanwhile, Homer runs into some luck, when a customer misunderstands Homer's
excuses for a sales pitch after falling asleep in a department store's display bed. The impressed store owner hires Homer as a salesman.
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Wow, this is soft.
Are you sleeping in the middle of my department store?
I don't work here.
Just yesterday,in Crazytown!
Luigi's, they deliver on flavor,but not to your house!
A lazy pop fly to star shortstop Bart Simpson.
It's like watching a monkey
Hey, get off my case!
He's back!
Don't you have to get to your job as a mattress salesman ?
a simple mattress.
Homer, we have a friend--
The Snugulux by Matrimonium.
Oh-ho, and here comes another "Bash Bart Block,"
Tommy Heinrich of the Yankees
hit a ball in my direction.
I have 17 grandchildren and a big home in Idaho.
"Bart?!"
Are you Bart Simpson?
Oh, I think I know
what you're doing wrong.
Memo: Bite my ass."
On one condition:
you do the shlepping.
I traded it to the Lovejoys!
I'm gonna let it shine Oh, glory
Lousy Reverend, he's having my sex
while I'm at home with Marge
Damn it!
I always thought
that was just a slogan
Like I just said, we can't.
and feel better about himself.
Just get that death wiener
away from me!
Homer, stop that.
You put on the Michael Bolton CD.
I'll put on my edible vestments.
Our marriage needs it more!
Or a-a Reuben.
It's like our honeymoon
all over again.
They warned
me not to talk to you.
Aired 17 years ago - Apr 22, 2007
Marge becomes a spectacle during a PTA meeting for not having an e-mail address, and she decides to take a chance on using the Internet. Amazed and delighted by all the Internet has to offer, Marge decides to join a popular role-playing fantasy game
named "Earthland Realms." To Marge's dismay, the game has her interacting with practically the whole town of Springfield, including Bart, who happens to be the game's most feared and destructive player. Meanwhile, Homer saves Lisa's soccer game from cancellation after he volunteers to take the place of a referee who recently quit. However, Homer's refereeing skills only exasperate Lisa, and her competitive streak gets the best of her.
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But maybe now. Or now.
Earthland Realms
is a multiplayer
Body type: Olive Oyl.
First, you must find the Armandahl of Nuxinor.
Actually, it's Saturday.
I better check on my elf-self.
It's amazing how you can
be a turkey in every reality.
He's the most evil,destructive player in this game.
Hmm?
Brave sir knight?
don't you look pretty!
Uh, diet grog with lemon?
Goblin's Code,yes, sir!
You're making me look bad
in front of my minions!
In my day, girls were worried about their boobs.
I forbid you to bend
it like Beckham.
You already promised you would.
Being a ref is athankless job...
Kicks just keep getting
harder to find...
This cld be my new thing,
and you're turning it into a joke!
You've become
a much better referee.
I said foul on 23!
Your daughter's been
floppin' all day !
That's hill-William to you, sir.
Now, Ronaldo away !
Aren't you glad I made you
take that na thedle?
Son, I'll never understand
women if I live to be 40.
Lisa's mad at me,
and Marge is am.
Give me ! Give me !
Aired 17 years ago - Mar 25, 2007
When the fireproof safe (which was bought after one too many house fires) explodes, Homer and Marge try to recreate the photos, but when one of them uncovers a scandal in the background, Homer decides to join the world of paparazzi - forgetting what
happened the last time he had a job that dealt in revealing other people's flaws to the public (in "Guess Who's Coming to Criticize Dinner?")
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You know how many fires are started
by birthday candles?
to be more careful with our open flames.
Everyone gets to put one precious item
just one item worthy of the safe.
I wore on our first date.
Sounds like my last physical!
iPod... iTunes...
causing it to boil,and soon explode.
But we'll have to move on.
Okay, we're recreating our series finale party
Your mission ended too soon.
It sure was nice of NASA to send you up again.
We could sell that photo to a tabloid.
Like Lindsay Lohan looking drunk, high and bony.
That's quite an offer.
Your head dinged my door panel!
Okay, how about an autograph for my kids?
Imported beer?
but leave yourself room to build.
Tell me,how's Maggie?
Yes, how can I help you,
my handsome friend?
I wanted to remember my place
in the book I was reading.
Oh, it is not.
If you read one more thing,
it is a purchase.
Did I attach the harness ?!
Now to make a young woman's
wedding day all about me.
You promised me one day
Krusty, your response
was the least funny.
to defeat a Robo Knight.
How are you gonna
help us, Beefaroni ?
He's trying to make me
look like a bad father.
I have no friends.
Friends take time.
Sweetie, maybe it's time
you retired from paparazzying.
Aired 17 years ago - Mar 11, 2007
When Homer accidentally declares bankruptcy, Grandpa ends up leaving the Springfield Retirement Castle and falls in love with Selma; Bart and Lisa con a delivery man out of cardboard boxes.
Aired 17 years ago - Mar 04, 2007
Principal Skinner decides to allow Lisa to tutor Cletus's kids instead of them enrolling into Springfield Elementary, but they end up on Krusty's show as a Musical Act; Bart sees a psychiatrist after pretending that he's possessed by a ghost in an an attempt get free food from the cafeteria.
buried him in an unmarked grave.
Dark Stanley takes your skin
while they recarpet
my condo.
Well, you are going
to get some counseling
Ah, ya never let
Willie be Willie.
We home-school 'em.
I see...
Well, I wouldn't, uh...
How do we stop her
writing up what she saw?
Less uptight?
enjoy some delicious fondue.
Will become by tutees.
I'll be on the porch
I've looked at the ink blots.
Actually, I just got
"Death Kill City II:
You have destroyed
all human life on earth.
is to get you some exposure
to the wider world.
always sucky to visit
My dad never takes me
"I am gay."
Pretentious laughs
at Bunuel retrospectives
Freestyle rap artists
What a number!
but these kids have
field trip journals to write.
and that our success had
led to some crazy
but the school only
paid for five sessions.
Now, now, don't talk
through him; talk to him.
and I'll pay them the most anyone
on TV is entitled to get: scale!
Hey, hey, kids.
Have I got a treat for you.
this guy. What's your
name again, fuzz-face?
pithy observations on modern life.
No counterpoint!
Sir, your solid gold
hound dog is here.
I saw you yesterday
in the dining room,
but I think this is more important.
to make you happy for an hour.
they can't fight with each other.
Aired 17 years ago - Feb 18, 2007
Eccentric documentary filmmaker Declan Desmond returns with his new film "Growing up Springfield" in which various characters in The Simpsons are interviewed. Homer and family pretend to be rich on the documentary, until Mr. Burns catches them in his summer home.
had found the fast track to becoming chief.
Oh... oh...
I'm making fun of your pants.
eight pairs of peanut butter and jelly pajamas...
That's your hand.
Squeaky, squeaky, squeaky!
is just one of the things I got going.
Get out of here!
The light from your eyes
That would be a devastating edit.
Check with me in eight years, Dr. Who.
Homer Simpson... a bloody millionaire?!
Well, Marge, you must be proud of your "Homie."
in eight short years?
with a simple invention: the Condiment Pen!
Can I use it on fish and chips?
When I, um, grow up, I'm gonna be a rocket scientist!
one where I'll meet a female woman of the girl-u-lar variety.
Listen to me, little Frink.
because a woman can do anything.
I'm a little burnt-out.
Boy brings enough
for everyone
Coming right up.
Why is your medicine cabinet
full of old man ointments?
This is Eduardo, my pool boy.
your fabulous millionaire
lifestyle is all a lie.
You've desecrated my every possession.
"Using the suspension spring
above the pendulum leader,
It's 11:59:59.
Winston doesn't like the front.
Sorry, sir.
Traffic was a nightmare.
But he seemed less than eager to meet.
I realized that if this bunny
was going to be boiled,
We let you in 32 years ago
and it's brought us nothing but pain.
It's been another eight years
and what do I have?
But all I am is the guy who makes
everyone else look good.
And you made him look like a fool.
Aired 17 years ago - Feb 11, 2007
After saving Springfield from burning down in city-wide fire, Mayor Quimby awards Bart with a driver’s license. During Bart’s travels to a nearby town, he develops a serious relationship with a teenage girl. Meanwhile, during a presentation at
school, Lisa lies about her Native American heritage and when everyone believes her, the lies result in some escalating problems for her.
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Aired 17 years ago - Jan 28, 2007
In an effort to stop Homer from taking revenge on the Rich Texan for cutting him off on the highway, Marge, Lisa and Bart offer up three cautionary tales of revenge.The Count of Monte Fatso: A parody of the book and film The Count of Monte Cristo,
in which Homer is cast as the Count.Revenge of the Geeks: Using a futuristic device called the “Get-back-inator,” Milhouse takes revenge on the Springfield Elementary bullies.Bartman Begins: A parody of the Batman origin story, in which Bart is cast in the title role.
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Aired 17 years ago - Jan 07, 2007
Homer surprises Marge with a visit to her favorite childhood vacation spot: an island called Barnacle Bay. But when the family arrives, they are shocked to discover Barnacle Bay’s tourism and economy has been decimated by the disappearance of the
local delicacy, the “Yum-Yum” fish. After causing some major damage to the boardwalk, Homer is forced to join a fishing crew to work off his debt and a parody of The Perfect Storm ensues.
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This is our chance.
I never seen Marge want to go somewhere so badly.
I'm gonna make her dream come true
There's even a poem about it.
My childhood paradise
Oh, this was my favorite sea horse.
Oh, my God! Tourists.
I didn't say stop.
This island used to be a paradise.
Oh, yum-yum fish are all we used to eat here.
Maybe you killed them all.
I guess, in the end, nothing's as good as you remember.
- Can I go again?
- All night long, baby.
Blue pinwheel, red pinwheel...
I say let him fish it off.
Yeah, he just plays with that knife
all day and night.
Just a few slarg fish.
It's Opposite Day.
Or should I say...
Chief Fish Clubber Homer.
My love has come along
Three years is
a long ways away.
Are you sure, Captain?
The barometer don't lie.
Dear Marge, how are you?
Uh, sure we will, son.
Look into thy starfish heart
and protect our souls
Aired 17 years ago - Dec 17, 2006
At Christmas time, Marge opens up her home to the jobless Gil. But problems arise when Gil overstays his welcome and Marge can’t bring herself to kick Gil out of the house.
Wow, Krusty and Mel sure can skate.
The Grumple has stolen
Whoa, watch where you're going there, pally.
but one with a warm,loyal heart.
one of those video gamechairs that vibrate...
What I want can't be bought at any store.
Mr. Costington!
It was for my daughter!
Taking back that doll would break
Oh, you poor man.
That's swell.
But I haven't given you a present.
It's Christmas! It's Christmas!
You have a bigger problem out there.
Hey Hey, who wants some eggs a la Harold Stassen?
I'll tell you why:Christian charity.
He sure has a lot of markers that don't work.
You're gonna put me out on Christmas day, huh?
I guess you don't have to leave till the holiday's over.
playing "Rachel's Theme"
from Batman Begins.
'cause I'm expecting a call any minute
now from my old boss at Jackpot Realty,
I guess you can stay
a little longer.
We're not keeping that moocher
in this house another minute.
That's why you have three kids.
Aunt Larina?
Why would you think I did?
Well, you can't kick him out,
Happy holidays
Those legs go on forever.
A heart-shaped box of chocolates.
Yes.
Oh. Say, Homer, how about
closin' up that robe?
May the calendar keep bringing
happy holidays...
There's O'Brians, O'Ryans,
O'Sheehans and Meehans
Happy Holidays
May the calendar keep bringing
happy holidays to you.
happy holidays to you.
Isn't this your posse on this glossy?
I just found my gumption,
and I like it!
But I have a "no" inside met
hat has to come out.
I need this, or I'll never
be able to say "no."
Aired 17 years ago - Dec 10, 2006
After being forced to attend Nelson’s birthday party, Bart becomes best friends with the schoolyard bully. Meanwhile, Homer develops a big interest with one of Lisa’s fantasy books.
Well, if no one else jumped off
Lisa, you're never gonna get a husband
Oh, your elbow's like
an angel's kiss,
like some ancient pagan, just dancing around
Must be a lot of traffic today.
Tingling because it's a certain someone's birthday.
My party peeps are en route,
but I thought I had some friends.
Yah!
We had pizza, cake and then sang songs
Bart, where you going?
Um, Nelson,
it's nuts.
I forgot how cool Bart was.
and wail on toddlers.
Okay, tucked in tight, glass of water,
It's the ninth book in
as she looked up at the stern but wise whiskers
Preposterous-sss!
But she's in trouble now.
I mean, a shark can't stop
swimming or it'll blow up.
All of a sudden, I was a somebody
in a school full of nobodies.
He' rebel,
no, no, no, to me...
Apparently, her mom makes
good mac and cheese.
Ow! I can't read ahead.
I promised Lisa I wouldn't.
"Angelica was trapped in the
suffoclock of Sandy Doom..."
Thanks for spoiler the there, big mouth.
right here in front of everyone.
- Steal a loose grapeshe grocery store.
- Really?
Well ere's something in my eye, too.
You're a nut bar, a whack job!
Only till 2008.
Look into it!
you die!
I somehow escaped
from the hourglass!
What happened to
the Merlinical Council?
Come with me.
Aired 17 years ago - Nov 26, 2006
After Homer is fired from the power plant, he buys an ice-cream truck and sells ice-cream. His successful business yields an abundance of discarded popsicle sticks and Marge finds another calling in life, as she uses the leftover sticks to create popular life-size statues of various citizens from Springfield.
Noooo...!
Max loved to talk about his work.
Why, doesn't he need it?
* Get your freak on, get your freak on *
He was following my design
who didn't waste their lives being mommies.
I call it leaving your "lega-she."
Or how about Becky Tyson, who invented the pink VCR.
And all I have to show for it is a clean floor.
Punch away, Nelson.
God bless America.
Who'th your boyfriend?
Are you sure you know what "glad" means?
Look, Maggie, I made another you.
Like Lenny, or Carl
Why, here he is next to us.
Set this baby down
I'm here with local sculptoress Marge Simpson who works in,
that says, "I was here, I mattered.
This is the most fun I've
ever had giving you wood.
and no one knows art like
a Texan with too much money.
I'm excited you're excited.
Hey, I do more than TV.
I need you here for emotional support.
Our marriage is like soft-serve ice cream.
Attention, losers:
Well, Homer, you destroyed
my artwork and my dreams.
Well, excuse me for having enormous
flaws that I don't work on!
Why don't you come
downstairs and cook dinner?
Okay?
It was giving you those sticks,
and watching you smile
If you won't talk to me,
I'll send in Polaroids
Aired 17 years ago - Nov 19, 2006
Lisa aides Moe in discovering his inner-poet and he gains swift popularity and recognition from a group of successful American authors, when Lisa helps to get his poetry published. However, Lisa is crushed, when Moe enjoys his newfound success with literary giants and fails to credit Lisa for her assistance in his poetry.
He can barely make it
and Grampa hasn't won
a single medal.
I've never been happier.
I was supposed to take Moe fishing today.
Happy birthday to me
Then you offered to take me fishing,
What a deep, tormented soul.
I want to write a report about you.
eyeball screams
broken pige
Ooh, Moe's a poet!
an epic poem-- like T.S.Eliot's "The Wasteland."
It jumps out at you like a ratin your underwear drawer.
Philistines.
"That's right,I said 'rapping tomato'
...you can't bump me...
Wait, wait, wait. Then that guy wasn't squeezin' my 'roids
Homer, don't drink and drive!
Hey, guys, did ja hear?
- How ya doin' there ? Moe Szyslak.
- Ah, magnificent Moe.
hyperextend the champ's pterygoideus
before kissing the mat good night.
Moe, your debut poem is as refreshing
as a second pair of socks on a wet hike.
1876 was the price
I paid for gas once.
I have some on tape.
...that I, uh, I thought
it up all by myself.
But we were a team!
I thought his novel The
Corrections needed none.
- How do you like me now?
- Fran-zone... !
Mr. Szyslak, there must be some person,
possibly in this very room,
- But I deserve acknowledgement.
- I said dismissed.
Hey, thanks for the heads up.
Moe, you're a heartless jerk.
Hey, st... stupid geese,
you're eatin' my brilliance.
He ruined her first Wordloaf.
So please, if you would pass
them clockwise up to table one,
Aired 17 years ago - Nov 12, 2006
Bart pre-enlists in the Army and when Homer goes to the Recruitment Center to clear up the mess, he is tricked into enlisting in the Army himself. Upon completion of basic training, Homer is assigned to lead some troops against a disgruntled Army Colonel in a war games simulation.
What? Being gay?
Let's go, dudes.
Standardized tests, standardized tests,
standardized tests.
Do you guys know where we can find
some awesome kids to show it to?
You go down to those recruiters
Fur is murder!
And the monkey head mittens.
Sounds, uh, like you're kind of tired
of being bossed around at home.
Aw, oh, oh, don't, no.
Attention!
Unfortunately, the demand
for troops has never been higher,
Here's your nicknames: Brooklyn, Hollywood,
while the rest of the
unit does push-ups!
I like rubbing people's feet
Man, you've got an awesome voice!
Frontline infantry. Frontline infantry.
But I am gonna give you a
special assignment.
This avocado just gave
me a wedding ring.
Stay crunchy, men.
Stay crunchy.
Sir, you can't just invade an
American city without authorization.
Oh. Guess I'd better
do my part.
You've seen what the US
Army does to prisoners.
"H" means "hot"?!
or have ever been amused by
the antics of Homer Simpson.
This operation has cost
over $50 million since lunch.
Don't worry.
I have a secret weapon
Dorothy's daughter comes every Sunday
and brings all kinds of wonderful soups.
Aired 17 years ago - Nov 05, 2006
Three more scary tales are offered up in this 17th edition of the Treehouse of Horror.Married to the Blob: After eating mysterious green goo from a meteorite, Homer grows to massive proportions while he eats everything in sight.You Gotta Know When
to Golem: Bart takes control of Golem of Jewish folklore, and forces the ancient statue to do his bidding by writing instructions on scrolls and placing them into the Golem's mouth.The Day the Earth Looked Stupid: Taking place in 1938 Springfield, the townspeople react to Orson Welles’ famous War of the Worlds radio broadcast. However, they pay no attention when Kang and Kodos actually do invade the town.
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Aired 18 years ago - Sep 24, 2006
After buying Homer a collection of handyman's books, Marge becomes a handywoman, but uses Homer since no one in town is thrilled over the idea of a female carpenter. Meanwhile, Bart finds out that Principal Skinner has a peanut allergy and uses a
peanut on a stick to torture Skinner, but the joke is on Bart when Skinner discovers that Bart is allergic to shrimp.
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And I love the idea
of you reading.
The letter doesn't say.
Oh, the floorboard
broke my nightstand.
It's "of accomplishment"!
Aww, what a sweet blasphemy.
You sure are, sweetie.
Homer, your butt just
gave me a brilliant idea!
Why don't you go inside and stir
your flubber while I get to work?
You know that old saying:
Mm-mmm!
Uh, like all manly men, I
have a vivid imagination.
Oh, why should we have to
give up our salty snacks
and my optometrist.
A principal can be a manor
a woman these days.
Why don't you just
incinerate the contraband?
We should fix her up with Barney.
Look, I'm sorry you're upset,
What ever.
I've got some paper to mâché.
♪ Beat on the brat, at the brat ♪
♪ Beat on the brat with a baseball bat ♪
I like the cooties so much,
I have a cootie wife.
Oh, yeah, switch, switch, switch.
By the way, nice job installing
this wall-chart bracket.
Ah, let's go home.
Your cowering suggests that
Bart has found your kryptonite.
Sweetie, you don't understand.
Stick-on-stick.
Just like the knights of old.
If either of us falls in, we're doomed!
Welcome, ladies and gentlemen,
honored guests
Aired 18 years ago - Sep 17, 2006
When Bart has problems with acting out, Marge and Homer take him to a child psychiatrist, who suggests that Bart should taking up drumming. Bart turns out to be a natural with the drums and much to the chagrin of Lisa; Bart is approached by jazz
musicians, who want him in their band. Meanwhile, Lisa turns to rescuing animals as a way to deal with her jealousy and depression, over not being a member of a jazz band herself.
MORE
-LESS
so we bought him a toy...
where cod and halibut
frolic in...!
Sleep tight, my angel!
Is it in
a safe neighborhood?
I love you so much.
This is Marcus
"Marbles" Le Marquez.
Oh, I can't believe it.
Stupid brother...
Jazz!
That is the most unfair...
and Gil's your guy!
Oh, I'm a jazz daddy
I like you more, now that
other people like you.
chew you up and spit you out.
Yeah, you know
what's even cuter?
You suuuuuck! You suuuuuck!
Lookin' back on the track
for a little green bag
No one knows you're here,
so be quiet.
Carl sketched us from the bank.
No, Buttercup! No!
And what about my new job
as a Mexican wrestler?
Uh, yes, I would like a bird
because I'm often
These animals are all gonna die.
I don't know.
but it costs $78,000.
Groovay, groovay!
Aired 18 years ago - Sep 10, 2006
At school, Lisa befriends a boy named Michael, who happens to be the son of mob boss, Fat Tony. Fat Tony is put out of commission by a rival family, and Homer and Bart get involved with the mob, when Michael, who is nothing like his father, is not interested in the “family business.”
Hop in what?
Hey, loser, we got a ride
from a real fan.
This is for every bus driver,
lunch lady, gym coach, hall monitor...
Carpool!
Just a sec, I've got to finish
my science project.
That weird kid who
never says anything.
No problem, I'll just drive
up to your house and get it.
and never forget:
the divisor goes into the dividend.
Oh, fun is so fun.
My daddy had to potty in a bag.
- That's me.
- I p-- you didn't
let me finish!
- You're sitting with me?
- I'm not afraid of you.
There's a triple-A battery
in my macaroni and cheese!
Are you just saying that
'cause you're afraid of my dad?
My dad wants me to go
into the family business.
Because I broughtthis Finding Nemo bedspread.
Sadly, my Anna Maria was whacked
by natural causes.
Your words honor
my family.
Boss, the Calabresis are
here for the sit-down.
I thought you meant "hot-sync" it.
You know how it is with us--
we figured you'd gone soft,
and were therefore whackable.
You said you meant
to make brownies.
You're my everything,
over here!
My God, this is like
a lap dance for my taste buds!
A chef, huh?
Hey, Tony, catch you later.
Your kid's got a bright future--
Michael, you have made me appear weak
in the eyes of my enemies.
the Calabresis are gonna try
to put him down for a dirt nap.
What am I gonna do now?
Whoa!
Where did that come from? Whoa!
All right, tap jockey, you owe Fat
Tony 50 bucks. Cough it up!
Take it, take it!
Just don't hurt me!
for keeping McDonald's
and Burger King out of town.
Dad, you want I should
plug him in the ankle?