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Archer (2009)

S4 E3
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Wednesdays 10:00 PM on FX
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Season 4  "Legs"  4x3

Aired 11 years ago - Jan 31, 2013

Archer's fear of cyborgs hits home when Krieger offers to make robotic legs for Gillette.

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Recap of Archer (2009) Season 4 Episode 3 (S04E03) - 1
I'm talking about bionics! From the Greek for... like... kickass!
 Recap of Archer (2009) Season 4 Episode 3 (S04E03) - 2
KRIEGER: No, you're not. For one thing, Katya wasn't completely dead.
 Recap of Archer (2009) Season 4 Episode 3 (S04E03) - 3
GILLETTE: So, it's gonna look like I'm leaving?
 Recap of Archer (2009) Season 4 Episode 3 (S04E03) - 4
GILLETTE: I'm assuming you mean "give me the ability to have an erection"?
 Recap of Archer (2009) Season 4 Episode 3 (S04E03) - 5
LANA: Pre-approved by whom?! ARCHER: Oh, now you're on my side.
 Recap of Archer (2009) Season 4 Episode 3 (S04E03) - 6
CYRIL: No?
 Recap of Archer (2009) Season 4 Episode 3 (S04E03) - 7
LANA: Asshole! ARCHER, CYRIL: Ew.
 Recap of Archer (2009) Season 4 Episode 3 (S04E03) - 8
KRIEGER: And so, a small power unit goes here, on your uh,
 Recap of Archer (2009) Season 4 Episode 3 (S04E03) - 9
KRIEGER: Who cares? Zrrp, they're in the dumpster.
 Recap of Archer (2009) Season 4 Episode 3 (S04E03) - 10
Plus when I'm taking out the old bones I take tons of pictures with my phone.
 Recap of Archer (2009) Season 4 Episode 3 (S04E03) - 11
KRIEGER: No, I mean if, God forbid, the worst happens...
 Recap of Archer (2009) Season 4 Episode 3 (S04E03) - 12
GILLETTE: Wait a minute! KRIEGER: Yeah, where's Carol?
 Recap of Archer (2009) Season 4 Episode 3 (S04E03) - 13
LANA: Cyril?! ARCHER: Is it Halloween already?
 Recap of Archer (2009) Season 4 Episode 3 (S04E03) - 14
ARCHER: In Krieger's lab?! CHERYL/CAROL: Anywhere, duh, it's portable.
 Recap of Archer (2009) Season 4 Episode 3 (S04E03) - 15
CHERYL/CAROL: [ Laughs ]
 Recap of Archer (2009) Season 4 Episode 3 (S04E03) - 16
GILLETTE: What could possibly, go, wrrngzzzzzz.
 Recap of Archer (2009) Season 4 Episode 3 (S04E03) - 17
Recap of Archer (2009) Season 4 Episode 3 (S04E03) - 18
But he won't be for long if you don't clamp that artery!
 Recap of Archer (2009) Season 4 Episode 3 (S04E03) - 19
RON: That's, yes, exactly, that's why you need a nice long relaxing cruise!
 Recap of Archer (2009) Season 4 Episode 3 (S04E03) - 20
ARCHER: Um, investigating a ballistic anomaly.
 Recap of Archer (2009) Season 4 Episode 3 (S04E03) - 21
ARCHER: Which reminds me, Grover Cleveland called, he wants his watch back.
 Recap of Archer (2009) Season 4 Episode 3 (S04E03) - 22
C'mon, this is awesome, it's like we're the Warren Commission.
 Recap of Archer (2009) Season 4 Episode 3 (S04E03) - 23
ARCHER: "Whom!" LANA: Archer!
 Recap of Archer (2009) Season 4 Episode 3 (S04E03) - 24
I don't think, so he must've meant... well, no, aren't terminators asexual?
 Recap of Archer (2009) Season 4 Episode 3 (S04E03) - 25
Get a hold of yourself! PAM: Sorry.
 Recap of Archer (2009) Season 4 Episode 3 (S04E03) - 26
MALORY: Since when?
 Recap of Archer (2009) Season 4 Episode 3 (S04E03) - 27
RON: Because I spent thirty years building the business so I don't have to be!
 Recap of Archer (2009) Season 4 Episode 3 (S04E03) - 28
MALORY: Ron this isn't a car dealership, it's... RON: The same principle!
 Recap of Archer (2009) Season 4 Episode 3 (S04E03) - 29
Recap of Archer (2009) Season 4 Episode 3 (S04E03) - 30
That'll hold way more Hispanics and lawnmowers.
 Recap of Archer (2009) Season 4 Episode 3 (S04E03) - 31
CYRIL: And Archer, obviously... LANA: Would rather see Ray dead!
 Recap of Archer (2009) Season 4 Episode 3 (S04E03) - 32
MALORY: But... what could have caused this?!
 Recap of Archer (2009) Season 4 Episode 3 (S04E03) - 33
MALORY: Oh! Well then I'll just get my coat.
 Recap of Archer (2009) Season 4 Episode 3 (S04E03) - 34
LANA: Yeah I know, are you cyborging Ray?
 Recap of Archer (2009) Season 4 Episode 3 (S04E03) - 35
RODNEY: One RPG-7 launcher and two grenades.
 Recap of Archer (2009) Season 4 Episode 3 (S04E03) - 36
LANA: We may have sort of a, uh, situation.
 Recap of Archer (2009) Season 4 Episode 3 (S04E03) - 37
RON: Reminds me of the head mechanic at my dealership in Yonkers.
 Recap of Archer (2009) Season 4 Episode 3 (S04E03) - 38
CYRIL: Well calling the airport's not gonna help.
 Recap of Archer (2009) Season 4 Episode 3 (S04E03) - 39
You were saying? ARCHER: I... shit.
 Recap of Archer (2009) Season 4 Episode 3 (S04E03) - 40
ARCHER: Oh my... I basically just lurch from one fireable offense to the next!
 Recap of Archer (2009) Season 4 Episode 3 (S04E03) - 41
Because I bet it would open the door.
 Recap of Archer (2009) Season 4 Episode 3 (S04E03) - 42
My God, what they did to that pig... BRETT: Heeelp...
 Recap of Archer (2009) Season 4 Episode 3 (S04E03) - 43
ARCHER: Mawp.
 Recap of Archer (2009) Season 4 Episode 3 (S04E03) - 44
CYRIL: Why is your instinctive response to run toward explosions?!
 Recap of Archer (2009) Season 4 Episode 3 (S04E03) - 45
CHERYL/CAROL:... permanent damage to my earballs because you're too
 Recap of Archer (2009) Season 4 Episode 3 (S04E03) - 46
ARCHER: I don't... CHERYL/CAROL: Tease.
 Recap of Archer (2009) Season 4 Episode 3 (S04E03) - 47
ARCHER: That's even creepier. So are you gonna open the damn door?
 Recap of Archer (2009) Season 4 Episode 3 (S04E03) - 48
So now if you'll excuse me... I have an entire human race to save.
 Recap of Archer (2009) Season 4 Episode 3 (S04E03) - 49
So Rodneeeeeey... Tease!
 Recap of Archer (2009) Season 4 Episode 3 (S04E03) - 50
CYRIL: Are you calling the airport again? LANA: Cyril shut your goddamn mouth!

Or scroll and see one by one:

Recap of Archer (2009) Season 4 Episode 3 (S04E03) - 2
KRIEGER: No, you're not. For one thing, Katya wasn't completely dead.
#2 Recap of Archer (2009) Season 4 Episode 3 (S04E03) - 3
GILLETTE: So, it's gonna look like I'm leaving?
#3 Recap of Archer (2009) Season 4 Episode 3 (S04E03) - 4
GILLETTE: I'm assuming you mean "give me the ability to have an erection"?
#4 Recap of Archer (2009) Season 4 Episode 3 (S04E03) - 5
LANA: Pre-approved by whom?! ARCHER: Oh, now you're on my side.
#5 Recap of Archer (2009) Season 4 Episode 3 (S04E03) - 6
CYRIL: No?
#6 Recap of Archer (2009) Season 4 Episode 3 (S04E03) - 7
LANA: Asshole! ARCHER, CYRIL: Ew.
#7 Recap of Archer (2009) Season 4 Episode 3 (S04E03) - 8
KRIEGER: And so, a small power unit goes here, on your uh,
#8 Recap of Archer (2009) Season 4 Episode 3 (S04E03) - 9
KRIEGER: Who cares? Zrrp, they're in the dumpster.
#9 Recap of Archer (2009) Season 4 Episode 3 (S04E03) - 10
Plus when I'm taking out the old bones I take tons of pictures with my phone.
#10 Recap of Archer (2009) Season 4 Episode 3 (S04E03) - 11
KRIEGER: No, I mean if, God forbid, the worst happens...
#11 Recap of Archer (2009) Season 4 Episode 3 (S04E03) - 12
GILLETTE: Wait a minute! KRIEGER: Yeah, where's Carol?
#12 Recap of Archer (2009) Season 4 Episode 3 (S04E03) - 13
LANA: Cyril?! ARCHER: Is it Halloween already?
#13 Recap of Archer (2009) Season 4 Episode 3 (S04E03) - 14
ARCHER: In Krieger's lab?! CHERYL/CAROL: Anywhere, duh, it's portable.
#14 Recap of Archer (2009) Season 4 Episode 3 (S04E03) - 15
CHERYL/CAROL: [ Laughs ]
#15 Recap of Archer (2009) Season 4 Episode 3 (S04E03) - 16
GILLETTE: What could possibly, go, wrrngzzzzzz.
#16 Recap of Archer (2009) Season 4 Episode 3 (S04E03) - 17 #17 Recap of Archer (2009) Season 4 Episode 3 (S04E03) - 18
But he won't be for long if you don't clamp that artery!
#18 Recap of Archer (2009) Season 4 Episode 3 (S04E03) - 19
RON: That's, yes, exactly, that's why you need a nice long relaxing cruise!
#19 Recap of Archer (2009) Season 4 Episode 3 (S04E03) - 20
ARCHER: Um, investigating a ballistic anomaly.
#20 Recap of Archer (2009) Season 4 Episode 3 (S04E03) - 21
ARCHER: Which reminds me, Grover Cleveland called, he wants his watch back.
#21 Recap of Archer (2009) Season 4 Episode 3 (S04E03) - 22
C'mon, this is awesome, it's like we're the Warren Commission.
#22 Recap of Archer (2009) Season 4 Episode 3 (S04E03) - 23
ARCHER: "Whom!" LANA: Archer!
#23 Recap of Archer (2009) Season 4 Episode 3 (S04E03) - 24
I don't think, so he must've meant... well, no, aren't terminators asexual?
#24 Recap of Archer (2009) Season 4 Episode 3 (S04E03) - 25
Get a hold of yourself! PAM: Sorry.
#25 Recap of Archer (2009) Season 4 Episode 3 (S04E03) - 26
MALORY: Since when?
#26 Recap of Archer (2009) Season 4 Episode 3 (S04E03) - 27
RON: Because I spent thirty years building the business so I don't have to be!
#27 Recap of Archer (2009) Season 4 Episode 3 (S04E03) - 28
MALORY: Ron this isn't a car dealership, it's... RON: The same principle!
#28 Recap of Archer (2009) Season 4 Episode 3 (S04E03) - 29 #29 Recap of Archer (2009) Season 4 Episode 3 (S04E03) - 30
That'll hold way more Hispanics and lawnmowers.
#30 Recap of Archer (2009) Season 4 Episode 3 (S04E03) - 31
CYRIL: And Archer, obviously... LANA: Would rather see Ray dead!
#31 Recap of Archer (2009) Season 4 Episode 3 (S04E03) - 32
MALORY: But... what could have caused this?!
#32 Recap of Archer (2009) Season 4 Episode 3 (S04E03) - 33
MALORY: Oh! Well then I'll just get my coat.
#33 Recap of Archer (2009) Season 4 Episode 3 (S04E03) - 34
LANA: Yeah I know, are you cyborging Ray?
#34 Recap of Archer (2009) Season 4 Episode 3 (S04E03) - 35
RODNEY: One RPG-7 launcher and two grenades.
#35 Recap of Archer (2009) Season 4 Episode 3 (S04E03) - 36
LANA: We may have sort of a, uh, situation.
#36 Recap of Archer (2009) Season 4 Episode 3 (S04E03) - 37
RON: Reminds me of the head mechanic at my dealership in Yonkers.
#37 Recap of Archer (2009) Season 4 Episode 3 (S04E03) - 38
CYRIL: Well calling the airport's not gonna help.
#38 Recap of Archer (2009) Season 4 Episode 3 (S04E03) - 39
You were saying? ARCHER: I... shit.
#39 Recap of Archer (2009) Season 4 Episode 3 (S04E03) - 40
ARCHER: Oh my... I basically just lurch from one fireable offense to the next!
#40 Recap of Archer (2009) Season 4 Episode 3 (S04E03) - 41
Because I bet it would open the door.
#41 Recap of Archer (2009) Season 4 Episode 3 (S04E03) - 42
My God, what they did to that pig... BRETT: Heeelp...
#42 Recap of Archer (2009) Season 4 Episode 3 (S04E03) - 43
ARCHER: Mawp.
#43 Recap of Archer (2009) Season 4 Episode 3 (S04E03) - 44
CYRIL: Why is your instinctive response to run toward explosions?!
#44 Recap of Archer (2009) Season 4 Episode 3 (S04E03) - 45
CHERYL/CAROL:... permanent damage to my earballs because you're too
#45 Recap of Archer (2009) Season 4 Episode 3 (S04E03) - 46
ARCHER: I don't... CHERYL/CAROL: Tease.
#46 Recap of Archer (2009) Season 4 Episode 3 (S04E03) - 47
ARCHER: That's even creepier. So are you gonna open the damn door?
#47 Recap of Archer (2009) Season 4 Episode 3 (S04E03) - 48
So now if you'll excuse me... I have an entire human race to save.
#48 Recap of Archer (2009) Season 4 Episode 3 (S04E03) - 49
So Rodneeeeeey... Tease!
#49 Recap of Archer (2009) Season 4 Episode 3 (S04E03) - 50
CYRIL: Are you calling the airport again? LANA: Cyril shut your goddamn mouth!
#50