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Archer (2009)

S3 E7
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Season 3  "Crossing Over"  3x7

Aired 12 years ago - Mar 01, 2012

Archer's sex life compromises his effectiveness as an agent. But more seriously than the countless other times.

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Recap of Archer (2009) Season 3 Episode 7 (S03E07) - 1
Recap of Archer (2009) Season 3 Episode 7 (S03E07) - 2
Recap of Archer (2009) Season 3 Episode 7 (S03E07) - 3
exaggerating when I say... PAM: That I was the best sex you ever had?
 Recap of Archer (2009) Season 3 Episode 7 (S03E07) - 4
Of Pam's hot, dirty, ball-slappiney... ARCHER: Gaaghh!
 Recap of Archer (2009) Season 3 Episode 7 (S03E07) - 5
ARCHER: Yeah, how're you gonna... I mean, my God, you can't,
 Recap of Archer (2009) Season 3 Episode 7 (S03E07) - 6
MALORY: Hitting on your dead colleague's widow?!
 Recap of Archer (2009) Season 3 Episode 7 (S03E07) - 7
ARCHER: How can you not?
 Recap of Archer (2009) Season 3 Episode 7 (S03E07) - 8
ARCHER: Wh-?
 Recap of Archer (2009) Season 3 Episode 7 (S03E07) - 9
LANA: Uh, ISIS getting an inside look at every single
 Recap of Archer (2009) Season 3 Episode 7 (S03E07) - 10
I mean, are you like dating, or...?
 Recap of Archer (2009) Season 3 Episode 7 (S03E07) - 11
Only at your place, or maybe a hotel, or... PAM: Or on the dirty floor in
 Recap of Archer (2009) Season 3 Episode 7 (S03E07) - 12
Wait, could -- you don't think Burt's ashamed to be seen with me?
 Recap of Archer (2009) Season 3 Episode 7 (S03E07) - 13
PAM: Ugh, oh alright!
 Recap of Archer (2009) Season 3 Episode 7 (S03E07) - 14
Are seeting et my desk?!
 Recap of Archer (2009) Season 3 Episode 7 (S03E07) - 15
JAKOV: Et tu, Brute?!
 Recap of Archer (2009) Season 3 Episode 7 (S03E07) - 16
You'll be like, six hundred miles from a toilet.
 Recap of Archer (2009) Season 3 Episode 7 (S03E07) - 17
MALORY: Because if and when Nikolai shows up here,
 Recap of Archer (2009) Season 3 Episode 7 (S03E07) - 18
CHERYL/CAROL: Orientals, duh!
 Recap of Archer (2009) Season 3 Episode 7 (S03E07) - 19
And as you can -- well it's over there now, but the telex from the Siberia
 Recap of Archer (2009) Season 3 Episode 7 (S03E07) - 20
Promise broke.
 Recap of Archer (2009) Season 3 Episode 7 (S03E07) - 21
KGB operation on the globe in his fat, combed-over head!
 Recap of Archer (2009) Season 3 Episode 7 (S03E07) - 22
because I will also be in New York.
 Recap of Archer (2009) Season 3 Episode 7 (S03E07) - 23
MALORY: And this is actually, ahem, the ISIS safehouse, cheers!
 Recap of Archer (2009) Season 3 Episode 7 (S03E07) - 24
MALORY: Nikolai, it's not that I don't- am not very fond of you, I mean,
 Recap of Archer (2009) Season 3 Episode 7 (S03E07) - 25
CYRIL: And isn't.
 Recap of Archer (2009) Season 3 Episode 7 (S03E07) - 26
MALORY: I can't believe you all know about that... JAKOV: Wow, thet is big dog!
 Recap of Archer (2009) Season 3 Episode 7 (S03E07) - 27
ARCHER: I'm serious, you are literally draining the life out of me.
 Recap of Archer (2009) Season 3 Episode 7 (S03E07) - 28
WOODHOUSE: Ms. Kane... and your mother.
 Recap of Archer (2009) Season 3 Episode 7 (S03E07) - 29
ARCHER: Awkward?
 Recap of Archer (2009) Season 3 Episode 7 (S03E07) - 30
LANA: Since otherwise he'd kill you?
 Recap of Archer (2009) Season 3 Episode 7 (S03E07) - 31
ARCHER: Yeah, when was... oh! I guess when I was in the
 Recap of Archer (2009) Season 3 Episode 7 (S03E07) - 32
LANA: Any time now... Cyril. Cyril!
 Recap of Archer (2009) Season 3 Episode 7 (S03E07) - 33
GILLETTE: Yeah, if Old Yeller had a big stack of KGB codebooks and fif - forty
 Recap of Archer (2009) Season 3 Episode 7 (S03E07) - 34
KGB AGENT: Only if I can defect, too.
 Recap of Archer (2009) Season 3 Episode 7 (S03E07) - 35
Barry gave me up so you'd trust Jakov on the rest!
 Recap of Archer (2009) Season 3 Episode 7 (S03E07) - 36
Yes you are.
 Recap of Archer (2009) Season 3 Episode 7 (S03E07) - 37
ARCHER: You're not my dad!
 Recap of Archer (2009) Season 3 Episode 7 (S03E07) - 38
ARCHER: And don't take this the wrong way, but thank Christ!
 Recap of Archer (2009) Season 3 Episode 7 (S03E07) - 39
CHERYL/CAROL: You -- wait a minute, why am I thinking you live in like, Russia?
 Recap of Archer (2009) Season 3 Episode 7 (S03E07) - 40
your place, because mine reeks of ocelot piss.
 Recap of Archer (2009) Season 3 Episode 7 (S03E07) - 41
Wait, doesn't ISIS have a safehouse?
 Recap of Archer (2009) Season 3 Episode 7 (S03E07) - 42
MALORY: Hold the door!
 Recap of Archer (2009) Season 3 Episode 7 (S03E07) - 43
PAM: So it's a DVD, a box of wine and some Hot Pockets, and off to bed.
 Recap of Archer (2009) Season 3 Episode 7 (S03E07) - 44
So just debrief yourself with the camera, and when I get back we'll talk
 Recap of Archer (2009) Season 3 Episode 7 (S03E07) - 45
CHERYL/CAROL: Well, here it is!
 Recap of Archer (2009) Season 3 Episode 7 (S03E07) - 46
who cares if he wants to keep it on the DL?
 Recap of Archer (2009) Season 3 Episode 7 (S03E07) - 47
LANA: Archer don't talk, just listen!
 Recap of Archer (2009) Season 3 Episode 7 (S03E07) - 48
ARCHER: Ha ha haaaa!
 Recap of Archer (2009) Season 3 Episode 7 (S03E07) - 49
MALORY: I swear to God, if he put as much effort into
 Recap of Archer (2009) Season 3 Episode 7 (S03E07) - 50
BARRY: Obviously!

Or scroll and see one by one:

Recap of Archer (2009) Season 3 Episode 7 (S03E07) - 2 #2 Recap of Archer (2009) Season 3 Episode 7 (S03E07) - 3
exaggerating when I say... PAM: That I was the best sex you ever had?
#3 Recap of Archer (2009) Season 3 Episode 7 (S03E07) - 4
Of Pam's hot, dirty, ball-slappiney... ARCHER: Gaaghh!
#4 Recap of Archer (2009) Season 3 Episode 7 (S03E07) - 5
ARCHER: Yeah, how're you gonna... I mean, my God, you can't,
#5 Recap of Archer (2009) Season 3 Episode 7 (S03E07) - 6
MALORY: Hitting on your dead colleague's widow?!
#6 Recap of Archer (2009) Season 3 Episode 7 (S03E07) - 7
ARCHER: How can you not?
#7 Recap of Archer (2009) Season 3 Episode 7 (S03E07) - 8
ARCHER: Wh-?
#8 Recap of Archer (2009) Season 3 Episode 7 (S03E07) - 9
LANA: Uh, ISIS getting an inside look at every single
#9 Recap of Archer (2009) Season 3 Episode 7 (S03E07) - 10
I mean, are you like dating, or...?
#10 Recap of Archer (2009) Season 3 Episode 7 (S03E07) - 11
Only at your place, or maybe a hotel, or... PAM: Or on the dirty floor in
#11 Recap of Archer (2009) Season 3 Episode 7 (S03E07) - 12
Wait, could -- you don't think Burt's ashamed to be seen with me?
#12 Recap of Archer (2009) Season 3 Episode 7 (S03E07) - 13
PAM: Ugh, oh alright!
#13 Recap of Archer (2009) Season 3 Episode 7 (S03E07) - 14
Are seeting et my desk?!
#14 Recap of Archer (2009) Season 3 Episode 7 (S03E07) - 15
JAKOV: Et tu, Brute?!
#15 Recap of Archer (2009) Season 3 Episode 7 (S03E07) - 16
You'll be like, six hundred miles from a toilet.
#16 Recap of Archer (2009) Season 3 Episode 7 (S03E07) - 17
MALORY: Because if and when Nikolai shows up here,
#17 Recap of Archer (2009) Season 3 Episode 7 (S03E07) - 18
CHERYL/CAROL: Orientals, duh!
#18 Recap of Archer (2009) Season 3 Episode 7 (S03E07) - 19
And as you can -- well it's over there now, but the telex from the Siberia
#19 Recap of Archer (2009) Season 3 Episode 7 (S03E07) - 20
Promise broke.
#20 Recap of Archer (2009) Season 3 Episode 7 (S03E07) - 21
KGB operation on the globe in his fat, combed-over head!
#21 Recap of Archer (2009) Season 3 Episode 7 (S03E07) - 22
because I will also be in New York.
#22 Recap of Archer (2009) Season 3 Episode 7 (S03E07) - 23
MALORY: And this is actually, ahem, the ISIS safehouse, cheers!
#23 Recap of Archer (2009) Season 3 Episode 7 (S03E07) - 24
MALORY: Nikolai, it's not that I don't- am not very fond of you, I mean,
#24 Recap of Archer (2009) Season 3 Episode 7 (S03E07) - 25
CYRIL: And isn't.
#25 Recap of Archer (2009) Season 3 Episode 7 (S03E07) - 26
MALORY: I can't believe you all know about that... JAKOV: Wow, thet is big dog!
#26 Recap of Archer (2009) Season 3 Episode 7 (S03E07) - 27
ARCHER: I'm serious, you are literally draining the life out of me.
#27 Recap of Archer (2009) Season 3 Episode 7 (S03E07) - 28
WOODHOUSE: Ms. Kane... and your mother.
#28 Recap of Archer (2009) Season 3 Episode 7 (S03E07) - 29
ARCHER: Awkward?
#29 Recap of Archer (2009) Season 3 Episode 7 (S03E07) - 30
LANA: Since otherwise he'd kill you?
#30 Recap of Archer (2009) Season 3 Episode 7 (S03E07) - 31
ARCHER: Yeah, when was... oh! I guess when I was in the
#31 Recap of Archer (2009) Season 3 Episode 7 (S03E07) - 32
LANA: Any time now... Cyril. Cyril!
#32 Recap of Archer (2009) Season 3 Episode 7 (S03E07) - 33
GILLETTE: Yeah, if Old Yeller had a big stack of KGB codebooks and fif - forty
#33 Recap of Archer (2009) Season 3 Episode 7 (S03E07) - 34
KGB AGENT: Only if I can defect, too.
#34 Recap of Archer (2009) Season 3 Episode 7 (S03E07) - 35
Barry gave me up so you'd trust Jakov on the rest!
#35 Recap of Archer (2009) Season 3 Episode 7 (S03E07) - 36
Yes you are.
#36 Recap of Archer (2009) Season 3 Episode 7 (S03E07) - 37
ARCHER: You're not my dad!
#37 Recap of Archer (2009) Season 3 Episode 7 (S03E07) - 38
ARCHER: And don't take this the wrong way, but thank Christ!
#38 Recap of Archer (2009) Season 3 Episode 7 (S03E07) - 39
CHERYL/CAROL: You -- wait a minute, why am I thinking you live in like, Russia?
#39 Recap of Archer (2009) Season 3 Episode 7 (S03E07) - 40
your place, because mine reeks of ocelot piss.
#40 Recap of Archer (2009) Season 3 Episode 7 (S03E07) - 41
Wait, doesn't ISIS have a safehouse?
#41 Recap of Archer (2009) Season 3 Episode 7 (S03E07) - 42
MALORY: Hold the door!
#42 Recap of Archer (2009) Season 3 Episode 7 (S03E07) - 43
PAM: So it's a DVD, a box of wine and some Hot Pockets, and off to bed.
#43 Recap of Archer (2009) Season 3 Episode 7 (S03E07) - 44
So just debrief yourself with the camera, and when I get back we'll talk
#44 Recap of Archer (2009) Season 3 Episode 7 (S03E07) - 45
CHERYL/CAROL: Well, here it is!
#45 Recap of Archer (2009) Season 3 Episode 7 (S03E07) - 46
who cares if he wants to keep it on the DL?
#46 Recap of Archer (2009) Season 3 Episode 7 (S03E07) - 47
LANA: Archer don't talk, just listen!
#47 Recap of Archer (2009) Season 3 Episode 7 (S03E07) - 48
ARCHER: Ha ha haaaa!
#48 Recap of Archer (2009) Season 3 Episode 7 (S03E07) - 49
MALORY: I swear to God, if he put as much effort into
#49 Recap of Archer (2009) Season 3 Episode 7 (S03E07) - 50
BARRY: Obviously!
#50