S5 E13
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Wednesdays 9:00 PM on ABC (US)
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Season 5  "Three Dinners"  5x13

Aired 5 years ago - Jan 22, 2014

Haley turns the tables when Claire and Phil try to talk with her about her future; Jay receives news from his friend Shorty; Cam and Mitch go on a romantic date.

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Recap of Modern Family Season 5 Episode 13 (S05E13) - 1
Recap of Modern Family Season 5 Episode 13 (S05E13) - 2
I got all day. Hey, is that your wife?
Recap of Modern Family Season 5 Episode 13 (S05E13) - 3
Will you guys quiet down? I'm trying to concentrate on my cardio.
Recap of Modern Family Season 5 Episode 13 (S05E13) - 4
Recap of Modern Family Season 5 Episode 13 (S05E13) - 5
- How do you think it works? - I have no idea.
Recap of Modern Family Season 5 Episode 13 (S05E13) - 6
I wonder what this thing is for.
Recap of Modern Family Season 5 Episode 13 (S05E13) - 7
"Dear, my boyfriend,"
Recap of Modern Family Season 5 Episode 13 (S05E13) - 8
and publicly write on their laptops.
Recap of Modern Family Season 5 Episode 13 (S05E13) - 9
Peter, you've been to the gym once...
Recap of Modern Family Season 5 Episode 13 (S05E13) - 10
Recap of Modern Family Season 5 Episode 13 (S05E13) - 11
without the fruity accent and the Pirates of the Caribbean wife.
Recap of Modern Family Season 5 Episode 13 (S05E13) - 12
Recap of Modern Family Season 5 Episode 13 (S05E13) - 13
Take your legs totally out of the equation.
Recap of Modern Family Season 5 Episode 13 (S05E13) - 14
I thought I was just out of shape, but that ain't it at all.
Recap of Modern Family Season 5 Episode 13 (S05E13) - 15
Recap of Modern Family Season 5 Episode 13 (S05E13) - 16
You're only as young as you feel.
Recap of Modern Family Season 5 Episode 13 (S05E13) - 17
Recap of Modern Family Season 5 Episode 13 (S05E13) - 18
Recap of Modern Family Season 5 Episode 13 (S05E13) - 19
Since I couldn't help you learn to use the toilet, I found something that can.
Recap of Modern Family Season 5 Episode 13 (S05E13) - 20
Remember, it's all about relaxing
Recap of Modern Family Season 5 Episode 13 (S05E13) - 21
Shotgun!
Recap of Modern Family Season 5 Episode 13 (S05E13) - 22
Wrapped in plastic, it's fantastic
Recap of Modern Family Season 5 Episode 13 (S05E13) - 23
You shouldn't have talked, you stupid bitch! I hope you die!
Recap of Modern Family Season 5 Episode 13 (S05E13) - 24
See, I told you, Peter, age is just a state of mind.
Recap of Modern Family Season 5 Episode 13 (S05E13) - 25
There's a pig behind that fence.
Recap of Modern Family Season 5 Episode 13 (S05E13) - 26
Peter, that pig...
Recap of Modern Family Season 5 Episode 13 (S05E13) - 27
Aw, crap! Go! Go! Go! Go! Go!
Recap of Modern Family Season 5 Episode 13 (S05E13) - 28
Recap of Modern Family Season 5 Episode 13 (S05E13) - 29
- What the hell?! - No! No!
Recap of Modern Family Season 5 Episode 13 (S05E13) - 30
Oh, Brian, this is disgusting! Oh, my God! Get it out of here!
Recap of Modern Family Season 5 Episode 13 (S05E13) - 31
- He is? - No.
Recap of Modern Family Season 5 Episode 13 (S05E13) - 32
You know, at this point, I'd probably welcome that.
Recap of Modern Family Season 5 Episode 13 (S05E13) - 33
Really?! The fridge?!
Recap of Modern Family Season 5 Episode 13 (S05E13) - 34
What a dumbass! Hey, let's spit on it.
Recap of Modern Family Season 5 Episode 13 (S05E13) - 35
Oh, boy, a pig! Can we keep it? Ow! It bit me!
Recap of Modern Family Season 5 Episode 13 (S05E13) - 36
and your bag of Werther's Originals.
Recap of Modern Family Season 5 Episode 13 (S05E13) - 37
Hey, you want to give me that cigar. I'm ready to smoke it now.
Recap of Modern Family Season 5 Episode 13 (S05E13) - 38
Peter!
Recap of Modern Family Season 5 Episode 13 (S05E13) - 39
to its lowest level in 33 years.
Recap of Modern Family Season 5 Episode 13 (S05E13) - 40
Lois, I think maybe it's better if I stay at Quagmire's for a while.
Recap of Modern Family Season 5 Episode 13 (S05E13) - 41
Recap of Modern Family Season 5 Episode 13 (S05E13) - 42
Recap of Modern Family Season 5 Episode 13 (S05E13) - 43
the way I figure it, the only way to even things out between us
Recap of Modern Family Season 5 Episode 13 (S05E13) - 44
Well, we did it, Watson. What an afternoon.
Recap of Modern Family Season 5 Episode 13 (S05E13) - 45
Well, that's the thing. I mean, there's only two phones in the...
Recap of Modern Family Season 5 Episode 13 (S05E13) - 46
Recap of Modern Family Season 5 Episode 13 (S05E13) - 47
All right, Peter, who's it going to be? Who do you want to sleep with?
Recap of Modern Family Season 5 Episode 13 (S05E13) - 48
- Anybody I want? - Anybody.
Recap of Modern Family Season 5 Episode 13 (S05E13) - 49
I haven't been so struck by a woman's beauty
Recap of Modern Family Season 5 Episode 13 (S05E13) - 50

Or scroll and see one by one:

Recap of Modern Family Season 5 Episode 13 (S05E13) - 2
I got all day. Hey, is that your wife?
#2
Recap of Modern Family Season 5 Episode 13 (S05E13) - 3
Will you guys quiet down? I'm trying to concentrate on my cardio.
#3
Recap of Modern Family Season 5 Episode 13 (S05E13) - 4 #4 Recap of Modern Family Season 5 Episode 13 (S05E13) - 5
- How do you think it works? - I have no idea.
#5
Recap of Modern Family Season 5 Episode 13 (S05E13) - 6
I wonder what this thing is for.
#6
Recap of Modern Family Season 5 Episode 13 (S05E13) - 7
"Dear, my boyfriend,"
#7
Recap of Modern Family Season 5 Episode 13 (S05E13) - 8
and publicly write on their laptops.
#8
Recap of Modern Family Season 5 Episode 13 (S05E13) - 9
Peter, you've been to the gym once...
#9
Recap of Modern Family Season 5 Episode 13 (S05E13) - 10 #10 Recap of Modern Family Season 5 Episode 13 (S05E13) - 11
without the fruity accent and the Pirates of the Caribbean wife.
#11
Recap of Modern Family Season 5 Episode 13 (S05E13) - 12 #12 Recap of Modern Family Season 5 Episode 13 (S05E13) - 13
Take your legs totally out of the equation.
#13
Recap of Modern Family Season 5 Episode 13 (S05E13) - 14
I thought I was just out of shape, but that ain't it at all.
#14
Recap of Modern Family Season 5 Episode 13 (S05E13) - 15 #15 Recap of Modern Family Season 5 Episode 13 (S05E13) - 16
You're only as young as you feel.
#16
Recap of Modern Family Season 5 Episode 13 (S05E13) - 17 #17 Recap of Modern Family Season 5 Episode 13 (S05E13) - 18 #18 Recap of Modern Family Season 5 Episode 13 (S05E13) - 19
Since I couldn't help you learn to use the toilet, I found something that can.
#19
Recap of Modern Family Season 5 Episode 13 (S05E13) - 20
Remember, it's all about relaxing
#20
Recap of Modern Family Season 5 Episode 13 (S05E13) - 21
Shotgun!
#21
Recap of Modern Family Season 5 Episode 13 (S05E13) - 22
Wrapped in plastic, it's fantastic
#22
Recap of Modern Family Season 5 Episode 13 (S05E13) - 23
You shouldn't have talked, you stupid bitch! I hope you die!
#23
Recap of Modern Family Season 5 Episode 13 (S05E13) - 24
See, I told you, Peter, age is just a state of mind.
#24
Recap of Modern Family Season 5 Episode 13 (S05E13) - 25
There's a pig behind that fence.
#25
Recap of Modern Family Season 5 Episode 13 (S05E13) - 26
Peter, that pig...
#26
Recap of Modern Family Season 5 Episode 13 (S05E13) - 27
Aw, crap! Go! Go! Go! Go! Go!
#27
Recap of Modern Family Season 5 Episode 13 (S05E13) - 28 #28 Recap of Modern Family Season 5 Episode 13 (S05E13) - 29
- What the hell?! - No! No!
#29
Recap of Modern Family Season 5 Episode 13 (S05E13) - 30
Oh, Brian, this is disgusting! Oh, my God! Get it out of here!
#30
Recap of Modern Family Season 5 Episode 13 (S05E13) - 31
- He is? - No.
#31
Recap of Modern Family Season 5 Episode 13 (S05E13) - 32
You know, at this point, I'd probably welcome that.
#32
Recap of Modern Family Season 5 Episode 13 (S05E13) - 33
Really?! The fridge?!
#33
Recap of Modern Family Season 5 Episode 13 (S05E13) - 34
What a dumbass! Hey, let's spit on it.
#34
Recap of Modern Family Season 5 Episode 13 (S05E13) - 35
Oh, boy, a pig! Can we keep it? Ow! It bit me!
#35
Recap of Modern Family Season 5 Episode 13 (S05E13) - 36
and your bag of Werther's Originals.
#36
Recap of Modern Family Season 5 Episode 13 (S05E13) - 37
Hey, you want to give me that cigar. I'm ready to smoke it now.
#37
Recap of Modern Family Season 5 Episode 13 (S05E13) - 38
Peter!
#38
Recap of Modern Family Season 5 Episode 13 (S05E13) - 39
to its lowest level in 33 years.
#39
Recap of Modern Family Season 5 Episode 13 (S05E13) - 40
Lois, I think maybe it's better if I stay at Quagmire's for a while.
#40
Recap of Modern Family Season 5 Episode 13 (S05E13) - 41 #41 Recap of Modern Family Season 5 Episode 13 (S05E13) - 42 #42 Recap of Modern Family Season 5 Episode 13 (S05E13) - 43
the way I figure it, the only way to even things out between us
#43
Recap of Modern Family Season 5 Episode 13 (S05E13) - 44
Well, we did it, Watson. What an afternoon.
#44
Recap of Modern Family Season 5 Episode 13 (S05E13) - 45
Well, that's the thing. I mean, there's only two phones in the...
#45
Recap of Modern Family Season 5 Episode 13 (S05E13) - 46 #46 Recap of Modern Family Season 5 Episode 13 (S05E13) - 47
All right, Peter, who's it going to be? Who do you want to sleep with?
#47
Recap of Modern Family Season 5 Episode 13 (S05E13) - 48
- Anybody I want? - Anybody.
#48
Recap of Modern Family Season 5 Episode 13 (S05E13) - 49
I haven't been so struck by a woman's beauty
#49
Recap of Modern Family Season 5 Episode 13 (S05E13) - 50 #50