S1 E14
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Tuesdays 9:30 PM on ABC (US)
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Season 1  "Andre from Marseille"  1x14

Aired 5 years ago - Feb 18, 2015

When Zoey brings home her first "serious" boyfriend, a boy from school also named Andre, Dre takes an instant dislike to him for many reasons, including the fact that he's white, from France and rather worldly for a kid. He's thrilled when they break up...until he learns that Andre dumped Zoey because she's too shallow, something Dre takes as a personal affront.

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Recap of black-ish Season 1 Episode 14 (S01E14) - 1
How does a boob like you get more Valentines than me?
Recap of black-ish Season 1 Episode 14 (S01E14) - 2
"you catch more flies with honey"?
Recap of black-ish Season 1 Episode 14 (S01E14) - 3
Recap of black-ish Season 1 Episode 14 (S01E14) - 4
But long story short... no ressie, mad wife, marriage on the line.
Recap of black-ish Season 1 Episode 14 (S01E14) - 5
Oh, here's your reservation.
Recap of black-ish Season 1 Episode 14 (S01E14) - 6
Oh, you too.
Recap of black-ish Season 1 Episode 14 (S01E14) - 7
- Seeing anything we like? - Yeah. Actually,
Recap of black-ish Season 1 Episode 14 (S01E14) - 8
Oh, okay. Hold on.
Recap of black-ish Season 1 Episode 14 (S01E14) - 9
Excuse me, garçon! Walk me through this skate.
Recap of black-ish Season 1 Episode 14 (S01E14) - 10
I'm sorry.
Recap of black-ish Season 1 Episode 14 (S01E14) - 11
Just volunteering my time here.
Recap of black-ish Season 1 Episode 14 (S01E14) - 12
I see what I did there.
Recap of black-ish Season 1 Episode 14 (S01E14) - 13
Chicken. Yep. That's it. The chicken.
Recap of black-ish Season 1 Episode 14 (S01E14) - 14
Thank you so much.
Recap of black-ish Season 1 Episode 14 (S01E14) - 15
Uh, public land. Out of my control.
Recap of black-ish Season 1 Episode 14 (S01E14) - 16
You take special moments and you kill them dead.
Recap of black-ish Season 1 Episode 14 (S01E14) - 17
Okay. Uh, oh, boy.
Recap of black-ish Season 1 Episode 14 (S01E14) - 18
Is this the father? I mean, he's actually part of your life?
Recap of black-ish Season 1 Episode 14 (S01E14) - 19
I've got to go freshen up.
Recap of black-ish Season 1 Episode 14 (S01E14) - 20
Recap of black-ish Season 1 Episode 14 (S01E14) - 21
Hello. I'm Keith.
Recap of black-ish Season 1 Episode 14 (S01E14) - 22
Told my wife her naan is not as puffy as my mom's.
Recap of black-ish Season 1 Episode 14 (S01E14) - 23
Ours is not to reason why.
Recap of black-ish Season 1 Episode 14 (S01E14) - 24
Hi, Dre.
Recap of black-ish Season 1 Episode 14 (S01E14) - 25
How long have you two been married?
Recap of black-ish Season 1 Episode 14 (S01E14) - 26
It's not just a fight about him leaving the milk on the counter.
Recap of black-ish Season 1 Episode 14 (S01E14) - 27
when I said you could try my short rib,
Recap of black-ish Season 1 Episode 14 (S01E14) - 28
You dance well.
Recap of black-ish Season 1 Episode 14 (S01E14) - 29
I wrote down the rest of what I wanted to say.
Recap of black-ish Season 1 Episode 14 (S01E14) - 30
I-I mean, it's the kind of thing that just throws you,
Recap of black-ish Season 1 Episode 14 (S01E14) - 31
she lost the moral high ground.
Recap of black-ish Season 1 Episode 14 (S01E14) - 32
No one else in here is having sex tonight,
Recap of black-ish Season 1 Episode 14 (S01E14) - 33
- Come on! - Special sex! Special sex! Special sex!
Recap of black-ish Season 1 Episode 14 (S01E14) - 34
Quivering lip... go.
Recap of black-ish Season 1 Episode 14 (S01E14) - 35
the higher she hoists herself, and then you...
Recap of black-ish Season 1 Episode 14 (S01E14) - 36
Or I could take it to the next level and be a legend.
Recap of black-ish Season 1 Episode 14 (S01E14) - 37
And what else exactly would I apologize for?
Recap of black-ish Season 1 Episode 14 (S01E14) - 38
Six long years without the greatest mug of all time.
Recap of black-ish Season 1 Episode 14 (S01E14) - 39
Pizza's here!
Recap of black-ish Season 1 Episode 14 (S01E14) - 40
Oh, my God. What have we done?
Recap of black-ish Season 1 Episode 14 (S01E14) - 41
Recap of black-ish Season 1 Episode 14 (S01E14) - 42
every couple has their own set of nukes pointed at each other.
Recap of black-ish Season 1 Episode 14 (S01E14) - 43
sippin' chowder out of Shaquille O'neal's big head
Recap of black-ish Season 1 Episode 14 (S01E14) - 44
You think everyone is Gene Hackman!
Recap of black-ish Season 1 Episode 14 (S01E14) - 45
Well, I never read your hip-hop "Goodfellas" screenplay.
Recap of black-ish Season 1 Episode 14 (S01E14) - 46
I took the Liberty of adding a generous tip.
Recap of black-ish Season 1 Episode 14 (S01E14) - 47
Let go of it!
Recap of black-ish Season 1 Episode 14 (S01E14) - 48
They ate the rest without me.
Recap of black-ish Season 1 Episode 14 (S01E14) - 49
- But it's really... - Now!
Recap of black-ish Season 1 Episode 14 (S01E14) - 50
You know what the worst part is?

Or scroll and see one by one:

Recap of black-ish Season 1 Episode 14 (S01E14) - 2
"you catch more flies with honey"?
#2
Recap of black-ish Season 1 Episode 14 (S01E14) - 3 #3 Recap of black-ish Season 1 Episode 14 (S01E14) - 4
But long story short... no ressie, mad wife, marriage on the line.
#4
Recap of black-ish Season 1 Episode 14 (S01E14) - 5
Oh, here's your reservation.
#5
Recap of black-ish Season 1 Episode 14 (S01E14) - 6
Oh, you too.
#6
Recap of black-ish Season 1 Episode 14 (S01E14) - 7
- Seeing anything we like? - Yeah. Actually,
#7
Recap of black-ish Season 1 Episode 14 (S01E14) - 8
Oh, okay. Hold on.
#8
Recap of black-ish Season 1 Episode 14 (S01E14) - 9
Excuse me, garçon! Walk me through this skate.
#9
Recap of black-ish Season 1 Episode 14 (S01E14) - 10
I'm sorry.
#10
Recap of black-ish Season 1 Episode 14 (S01E14) - 11
Just volunteering my time here.
#11
Recap of black-ish Season 1 Episode 14 (S01E14) - 12
I see what I did there.
#12
Recap of black-ish Season 1 Episode 14 (S01E14) - 13
Chicken. Yep. That's it. The chicken.
#13
Recap of black-ish Season 1 Episode 14 (S01E14) - 14
Thank you so much.
#14
Recap of black-ish Season 1 Episode 14 (S01E14) - 15
Uh, public land. Out of my control.
#15
Recap of black-ish Season 1 Episode 14 (S01E14) - 16
You take special moments and you kill them dead.
#16
Recap of black-ish Season 1 Episode 14 (S01E14) - 17
Okay. Uh, oh, boy.
#17
Recap of black-ish Season 1 Episode 14 (S01E14) - 18
Is this the father? I mean, he's actually part of your life?
#18
Recap of black-ish Season 1 Episode 14 (S01E14) - 19
I've got to go freshen up.
#19
Recap of black-ish Season 1 Episode 14 (S01E14) - 20 #20 Recap of black-ish Season 1 Episode 14 (S01E14) - 21
Hello. I'm Keith.
#21
Recap of black-ish Season 1 Episode 14 (S01E14) - 22
Told my wife her naan is not as puffy as my mom's.
#22
Recap of black-ish Season 1 Episode 14 (S01E14) - 23
Ours is not to reason why.
#23
Recap of black-ish Season 1 Episode 14 (S01E14) - 24
Hi, Dre.
#24
Recap of black-ish Season 1 Episode 14 (S01E14) - 25
How long have you two been married?
#25
Recap of black-ish Season 1 Episode 14 (S01E14) - 26
It's not just a fight about him leaving the milk on the counter.
#26
Recap of black-ish Season 1 Episode 14 (S01E14) - 27
when I said you could try my short rib,
#27
Recap of black-ish Season 1 Episode 14 (S01E14) - 28
You dance well.
#28
Recap of black-ish Season 1 Episode 14 (S01E14) - 29
I wrote down the rest of what I wanted to say.
#29
Recap of black-ish Season 1 Episode 14 (S01E14) - 30
I-I mean, it's the kind of thing that just throws you,
#30
Recap of black-ish Season 1 Episode 14 (S01E14) - 31
she lost the moral high ground.
#31
Recap of black-ish Season 1 Episode 14 (S01E14) - 32
No one else in here is having sex tonight,
#32
Recap of black-ish Season 1 Episode 14 (S01E14) - 33
- Come on! - Special sex! Special sex! Special sex!
#33
Recap of black-ish Season 1 Episode 14 (S01E14) - 34
Quivering lip... go.
#34
Recap of black-ish Season 1 Episode 14 (S01E14) - 35
the higher she hoists herself, and then you...
#35
Recap of black-ish Season 1 Episode 14 (S01E14) - 36
Or I could take it to the next level and be a legend.
#36
Recap of black-ish Season 1 Episode 14 (S01E14) - 37
And what else exactly would I apologize for?
#37
Recap of black-ish Season 1 Episode 14 (S01E14) - 38
Six long years without the greatest mug of all time.
#38
Recap of black-ish Season 1 Episode 14 (S01E14) - 39
Pizza's here!
#39
Recap of black-ish Season 1 Episode 14 (S01E14) - 40
Oh, my God. What have we done?
#40
Recap of black-ish Season 1 Episode 14 (S01E14) - 41 #41 Recap of black-ish Season 1 Episode 14 (S01E14) - 42
every couple has their own set of nukes pointed at each other.
#42
Recap of black-ish Season 1 Episode 14 (S01E14) - 43
sippin' chowder out of Shaquille O'neal's big head
#43
Recap of black-ish Season 1 Episode 14 (S01E14) - 44
You think everyone is Gene Hackman!
#44
Recap of black-ish Season 1 Episode 14 (S01E14) - 45
Well, I never read your hip-hop "Goodfellas" screenplay.
#45
Recap of black-ish Season 1 Episode 14 (S01E14) - 46
I took the Liberty of adding a generous tip.
#46
Recap of black-ish Season 1 Episode 14 (S01E14) - 47
Let go of it!
#47
Recap of black-ish Season 1 Episode 14 (S01E14) - 48
They ate the rest without me.
#48
Recap of black-ish Season 1 Episode 14 (S01E14) - 49
- But it's really... - Now!
#49
Recap of black-ish Season 1 Episode 14 (S01E14) - 50
You know what the worst part is?
#50