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Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt

S3 E9
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Netflix
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Season 3  "Kimmy Goes to Church!"  3x9

Aired 7 years ago - May 19, 2017

Titus takes Kimmy to church on Good Friday, where they tangle with an elderly busybody. Jacqueline gives Lillian a makeover for Passover.

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Recap of Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt Season 3 Episode 9 (S03E09) - 1
♪ Oh, happy day ♪
 Recap of Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt Season 3 Episode 9 (S03E09) - 2
Wait, a lady reverend?
 Recap of Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt Season 3 Episode 9 (S03E09) - 3
Recap of Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt Season 3 Episode 9 (S03E09) - 4
So thank you for welcoming me on this Good Friday.
 Recap of Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt Season 3 Episode 9 (S03E09) - 5
[laughs] That was very funny, by the way.
 Recap of Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt Season 3 Episode 9 (S03E09) - 6
and I run the Easter clothing drive.
 Recap of Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt Season 3 Episode 9 (S03E09) - 7
They collect gossip like Tituses collect expired deli meats,
 Recap of Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt Season 3 Episode 9 (S03E09) - 8
[sighs]
 Recap of Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt Season 3 Episode 9 (S03E09) - 9
No one on the message boards told me his wife died.
 Recap of Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt Season 3 Episode 9 (S03E09) - 10
You could be spending a lot of time with them in court after he dies.
 Recap of Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt Season 3 Episode 9 (S03E09) - 11
[very flatly] ♪ Blood ♪
 Recap of Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt Season 3 Episode 9 (S03E09) - 12
If he's the lead, who else is in this choir?
 Recap of Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt Season 3 Episode 9 (S03E09) - 13
We're getting to the best part: shopping!
 Recap of Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt Season 3 Episode 9 (S03E09) - 14
Deirdre Robespierre. I'm Head Mom at St. Clotilde's.
 Recap of Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt Season 3 Episode 9 (S03E09) - 15
[both laughing exaggeratedly]
 Recap of Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt Season 3 Episode 9 (S03E09) - 16
Recap of Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt Season 3 Episode 9 (S03E09) - 17
Not if they follow the Bible.
 Recap of Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt Season 3 Episode 9 (S03E09) - 18
And it was your fault for getting kicked out.
 Recap of Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt Season 3 Episode 9 (S03E09) - 19
These are good people.
 Recap of Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt Season 3 Episode 9 (S03E09) - 20
All right!
 Recap of Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt Season 3 Episode 9 (S03E09) - 21
At school pickups, Easter egg hunts,
 Recap of Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt Season 3 Episode 9 (S03E09) - 22
Recap of Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt Season 3 Episode 9 (S03E09) - 23
He doesn't have any friends and can't afford anything in there.
 Recap of Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt Season 3 Episode 9 (S03E09) - 24
A woman crashed her car into the mayor's house this morning.
 Recap of Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt Season 3 Episode 9 (S03E09) - 25
But okay, I'll find you after service tomorrow.
 Recap of Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt Season 3 Episode 9 (S03E09) - 26
Recap of Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt Season 3 Episode 9 (S03E09) - 27
♪ Elijah Rock, shout, shout, shout Whoo! ♪
 Recap of Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt Season 3 Episode 9 (S03E09) - 28
Gosh dang it! I mean, is that what all religion is?
 Recap of Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt Season 3 Episode 9 (S03E09) - 29
I saw Clara steal a coat from the clothing drive.
 Recap of Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt Season 3 Episode 9 (S03E09) - 30
Listen, I'm not like you. I don't care what people think.
 Recap of Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt Season 3 Episode 9 (S03E09) - 31
[laughter]
 Recap of Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt Season 3 Episode 9 (S03E09) - 32
I'm just making an educated guess about you,
 Recap of Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt Season 3 Episode 9 (S03E09) - 33
My mind is so clear!
 Recap of Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt Season 3 Episode 9 (S03E09) - 34
You look like a black guy on Easter.
 Recap of Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt Season 3 Episode 9 (S03E09) - 35
Recap of Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt Season 3 Episode 9 (S03E09) - 36
The choir director's your nephew?
 Recap of Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt Season 3 Episode 9 (S03E09) - 37
That's why you were all over me like yellow on teeth.
 Recap of Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt Season 3 Episode 9 (S03E09) - 38
Oh, I gotta tell Kimmy her dumb plan is off.
 Recap of Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt Season 3 Episode 9 (S03E09) - 39
Well, my 18-hour bra busted out about four hours ago,
 Recap of Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt Season 3 Episode 9 (S03E09) - 40
[together] We suck!
 Recap of Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt Season 3 Episode 9 (S03E09) - 41
Now you know they suck just as much as you do.
 Recap of Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt Season 3 Episode 9 (S03E09) - 42
Buckley!
 Recap of Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt Season 3 Episode 9 (S03E09) - 43
And now it seems the poor thing is Grey Gardens-ing.
 Recap of Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt Season 3 Episode 9 (S03E09) - 44
I'm the one who decided we were over cake pops.
 Recap of Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt Season 3 Episode 9 (S03E09) - 45
[Deirdre] Fine.
 Recap of Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt Season 3 Episode 9 (S03E09) - 46
"Humble yourself, and God will give you grace.
 Recap of Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt Season 3 Episode 9 (S03E09) - 47
But guess what. Real religion's a sham.
 Recap of Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt Season 3 Episode 9 (S03E09) - 48
No. Not cute ducks.
 Recap of Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt Season 3 Episode 9 (S03E09) - 49
She didn't, baby girl.
 Recap of Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt Season 3 Episode 9 (S03E09) - 50
-M'diet's my wife's name. -[woman] Help him, Lord!

Or scroll and see one by one:

Recap of Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt Season 3 Episode 9 (S03E09) - 2
Wait, a lady reverend?
#2 Recap of Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt Season 3 Episode 9 (S03E09) - 3 #3 Recap of Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt Season 3 Episode 9 (S03E09) - 4
So thank you for welcoming me on this Good Friday.
#4 Recap of Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt Season 3 Episode 9 (S03E09) - 5
[laughs] That was very funny, by the way.
#5 Recap of Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt Season 3 Episode 9 (S03E09) - 6
and I run the Easter clothing drive.
#6 Recap of Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt Season 3 Episode 9 (S03E09) - 7
They collect gossip like Tituses collect expired deli meats,
#7 Recap of Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt Season 3 Episode 9 (S03E09) - 8
[sighs]
#8 Recap of Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt Season 3 Episode 9 (S03E09) - 9
No one on the message boards told me his wife died.
#9 Recap of Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt Season 3 Episode 9 (S03E09) - 10
You could be spending a lot of time with them in court after he dies.
#10 Recap of Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt Season 3 Episode 9 (S03E09) - 11
[very flatly] ♪ Blood ♪
#11 Recap of Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt Season 3 Episode 9 (S03E09) - 12
If he's the lead, who else is in this choir?
#12 Recap of Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt Season 3 Episode 9 (S03E09) - 13
We're getting to the best part: shopping!
#13 Recap of Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt Season 3 Episode 9 (S03E09) - 14
Deirdre Robespierre. I'm Head Mom at St. Clotilde's.
#14 Recap of Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt Season 3 Episode 9 (S03E09) - 15
[both laughing exaggeratedly]
#15 Recap of Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt Season 3 Episode 9 (S03E09) - 16 #16 Recap of Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt Season 3 Episode 9 (S03E09) - 17
Not if they follow the Bible.
#17 Recap of Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt Season 3 Episode 9 (S03E09) - 18
And it was your fault for getting kicked out.
#18 Recap of Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt Season 3 Episode 9 (S03E09) - 19
These are good people.
#19 Recap of Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt Season 3 Episode 9 (S03E09) - 20
All right!
#20 Recap of Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt Season 3 Episode 9 (S03E09) - 21
At school pickups, Easter egg hunts,
#21 Recap of Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt Season 3 Episode 9 (S03E09) - 22 #22 Recap of Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt Season 3 Episode 9 (S03E09) - 23
He doesn't have any friends and can't afford anything in there.
#23 Recap of Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt Season 3 Episode 9 (S03E09) - 24
A woman crashed her car into the mayor's house this morning.
#24 Recap of Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt Season 3 Episode 9 (S03E09) - 25
But okay, I'll find you after service tomorrow.
#25 Recap of Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt Season 3 Episode 9 (S03E09) - 26 #26 Recap of Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt Season 3 Episode 9 (S03E09) - 27
♪ Elijah Rock, shout, shout, shout Whoo! ♪
#27 Recap of Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt Season 3 Episode 9 (S03E09) - 28
Gosh dang it! I mean, is that what all religion is?
#28 Recap of Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt Season 3 Episode 9 (S03E09) - 29
I saw Clara steal a coat from the clothing drive.
#29 Recap of Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt Season 3 Episode 9 (S03E09) - 30
Listen, I'm not like you. I don't care what people think.
#30 Recap of Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt Season 3 Episode 9 (S03E09) - 31
[laughter]
#31 Recap of Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt Season 3 Episode 9 (S03E09) - 32
I'm just making an educated guess about you,
#32 Recap of Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt Season 3 Episode 9 (S03E09) - 33
My mind is so clear!
#33 Recap of Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt Season 3 Episode 9 (S03E09) - 34
You look like a black guy on Easter.
#34 Recap of Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt Season 3 Episode 9 (S03E09) - 35 #35 Recap of Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt Season 3 Episode 9 (S03E09) - 36
The choir director's your nephew?
#36 Recap of Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt Season 3 Episode 9 (S03E09) - 37
That's why you were all over me like yellow on teeth.
#37 Recap of Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt Season 3 Episode 9 (S03E09) - 38
Oh, I gotta tell Kimmy her dumb plan is off.
#38 Recap of Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt Season 3 Episode 9 (S03E09) - 39
Well, my 18-hour bra busted out about four hours ago,
#39 Recap of Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt Season 3 Episode 9 (S03E09) - 40
[together] We suck!
#40 Recap of Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt Season 3 Episode 9 (S03E09) - 41
Now you know they suck just as much as you do.
#41 Recap of Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt Season 3 Episode 9 (S03E09) - 42
Buckley!
#42 Recap of Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt Season 3 Episode 9 (S03E09) - 43
And now it seems the poor thing is Grey Gardens-ing.
#43 Recap of Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt Season 3 Episode 9 (S03E09) - 44
I'm the one who decided we were over cake pops.
#44 Recap of Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt Season 3 Episode 9 (S03E09) - 45
[Deirdre] Fine.
#45 Recap of Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt Season 3 Episode 9 (S03E09) - 46
"Humble yourself, and God will give you grace.
#46 Recap of Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt Season 3 Episode 9 (S03E09) - 47
But guess what. Real religion's a sham.
#47 Recap of Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt Season 3 Episode 9 (S03E09) - 48
No. Not cute ducks.
#48 Recap of Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt Season 3 Episode 9 (S03E09) - 49
She didn't, baby girl.
#49 Recap of Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt Season 3 Episode 9 (S03E09) - 50
-M'diet's my wife's name. -[woman] Help him, Lord!
#50