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Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt

S3 E3
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Ended
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Netflix
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Season 3  "Kimmy Can't Help You!"  3x3

Aired 7 years ago - May 19, 2017

A surprise visitor delivers divorce papers to Kimmy. Jacqueline comes up with a plan to get Russ’s dad to rename the Redskins.

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Recap of Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt Season 3 Episode 3 (S03E03) - 1
[man] You're watching Sadsack TV, random stuff from the '70s...
 Recap of Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt Season 3 Episode 3 (S03E03) - 2
Did I take my medicine? What is this?
 Recap of Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt Season 3 Episode 3 (S03E03) - 3
Recap of Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt Season 3 Episode 3 (S03E03) - 4
-We really don't, but thanks. -Ugh. Where you from?
 Recap of Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt Season 3 Episode 3 (S03E03) - 5
Mystery bitch. [laughs] Ouch!
 Recap of Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt Season 3 Episode 3 (S03E03) - 6
we could actually get married on Fried Chicken Night.
 Recap of Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt Season 3 Episode 3 (S03E03) - 7
[gulps]
 Recap of Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt Season 3 Episode 3 (S03E03) - 8
[singers] ♪ Damn it ♪
 Recap of Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt Season 3 Episode 3 (S03E03) - 9
and Iktomi is a Lakota s--
 Recap of Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt Season 3 Episode 3 (S03E03) - 10
Let me just-- Let me just make a call.
 Recap of Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt Season 3 Episode 3 (S03E03) - 11
When she said kudos to you, what did that mean?
 Recap of Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt Season 3 Episode 3 (S03E03) - 12
"Don't marry a monster?"
 Recap of Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt Season 3 Episode 3 (S03E03) - 13
since I moved to Indiana five months ago.
 Recap of Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt Season 3 Episode 3 (S03E03) - 14
Recap of Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt Season 3 Episode 3 (S03E03) - 15
[printer clicks and buzzes]
 Recap of Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt Season 3 Episode 3 (S03E03) - 16
especially Stewart and Phoebe
 Recap of Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt Season 3 Episode 3 (S03E03) - 17
and I'm getting a little tired of the boardroom.
 Recap of Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt Season 3 Episode 3 (S03E03) - 18
Congratulations, Dukey-boy.
 Recap of Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt Season 3 Episode 3 (S03E03) - 19
[all murmuring and chuckling]
 Recap of Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt Season 3 Episode 3 (S03E03) - 20
It's still page one.
 Recap of Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt Season 3 Episode 3 (S03E03) - 21
So the guards Tased him, which, of course, Tased me.
 Recap of Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt Season 3 Episode 3 (S03E03) - 22
that he did all that stuff.
 Recap of Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt Season 3 Episode 3 (S03E03) - 23
Recap of Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt Season 3 Episode 3 (S03E03) - 24
His mother worked, you know.
 Recap of Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt Season 3 Episode 3 (S03E03) - 25
I almost forgot.
 Recap of Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt Season 3 Episode 3 (S03E03) - 26
A farmers market, dog park,
 Recap of Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt Season 3 Episode 3 (S03E03) - 27
Recap of Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt Season 3 Episode 3 (S03E03) - 28
Oh, God, stop! But thank you for driving electric.
 Recap of Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt Season 3 Episode 3 (S03E03) - 29
but today's been a gosh-dang, mother-fudging sugar-show!
 Recap of Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt Season 3 Episode 3 (S03E03) - 30
Recap of Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt Season 3 Episode 3 (S03E03) - 31
[applause]
 Recap of Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt Season 3 Episode 3 (S03E03) - 32
like your heart got pulled into the wheel well
 Recap of Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt Season 3 Episode 3 (S03E03) - 33
and measured our tumbleweed.
 Recap of Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt Season 3 Episode 3 (S03E03) - 34
just continue to lie there and not make any sounds at all.
 Recap of Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt Season 3 Episode 3 (S03E03) - 35
No, she's coming back.
 Recap of Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt Season 3 Episode 3 (S03E03) - 36
by guys who looked real good on paper.
 Recap of Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt Season 3 Episode 3 (S03E03) - 37
I'm not stupid, Titus.
 Recap of Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt Season 3 Episode 3 (S03E03) - 38
I found a ton of rare nom-noms on the way over and crushed it.
 Recap of Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt Season 3 Episode 3 (S03E03) - 39
Don't be ridiculous, Jacqueline.
 Recap of Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt Season 3 Episode 3 (S03E03) - 40
Let's get you and Russ married before God takes him.
 Recap of Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt Season 3 Episode 3 (S03E03) - 41
Kimberly, Wendy's like a beautiful, rare Barbie
 Recap of Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt Season 3 Episode 3 (S03E03) - 42
-I think only you can-- -Stop it!
 Recap of Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt Season 3 Episode 3 (S03E03) - 43
[laughter]
 Recap of Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt Season 3 Episode 3 (S03E03) - 44
So you gonna marry him or not?
 Recap of Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt Season 3 Episode 3 (S03E03) - 45
I know you need the money, but you'll find another way,
 Recap of Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt Season 3 Episode 3 (S03E03) - 46
[in Spanish] How long have you been here?
 Recap of Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt Season 3 Episode 3 (S03E03) - 47
Yeah, and I'd only be jealous if he married the cab driver from Wings.
 Recap of Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt Season 3 Episode 3 (S03E03) - 48
[in Spanish] Never mind.
 Recap of Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt Season 3 Episode 3 (S03E03) - 49
And you can't stop me from seeing him
 Recap of Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt Season 3 Episode 3 (S03E03) - 50
[sighs]

Or scroll and see one by one:

Recap of Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt Season 3 Episode 3 (S03E03) - 2
Did I take my medicine? What is this?
#2 Recap of Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt Season 3 Episode 3 (S03E03) - 3 #3 Recap of Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt Season 3 Episode 3 (S03E03) - 4
-We really don't, but thanks. -Ugh. Where you from?
#4 Recap of Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt Season 3 Episode 3 (S03E03) - 5
Mystery bitch. [laughs] Ouch!
#5 Recap of Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt Season 3 Episode 3 (S03E03) - 6
we could actually get married on Fried Chicken Night.
#6 Recap of Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt Season 3 Episode 3 (S03E03) - 7
[gulps]
#7 Recap of Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt Season 3 Episode 3 (S03E03) - 8
[singers] ♪ Damn it ♪
#8 Recap of Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt Season 3 Episode 3 (S03E03) - 9
and Iktomi is a Lakota s--
#9 Recap of Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt Season 3 Episode 3 (S03E03) - 10
Let me just-- Let me just make a call.
#10 Recap of Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt Season 3 Episode 3 (S03E03) - 11
When she said kudos to you, what did that mean?
#11 Recap of Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt Season 3 Episode 3 (S03E03) - 12
"Don't marry a monster?"
#12 Recap of Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt Season 3 Episode 3 (S03E03) - 13
since I moved to Indiana five months ago.
#13 Recap of Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt Season 3 Episode 3 (S03E03) - 14 #14 Recap of Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt Season 3 Episode 3 (S03E03) - 15
[printer clicks and buzzes]
#15 Recap of Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt Season 3 Episode 3 (S03E03) - 16
especially Stewart and Phoebe
#16 Recap of Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt Season 3 Episode 3 (S03E03) - 17
and I'm getting a little tired of the boardroom.
#17 Recap of Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt Season 3 Episode 3 (S03E03) - 18
Congratulations, Dukey-boy.
#18 Recap of Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt Season 3 Episode 3 (S03E03) - 19
[all murmuring and chuckling]
#19 Recap of Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt Season 3 Episode 3 (S03E03) - 20
It's still page one.
#20 Recap of Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt Season 3 Episode 3 (S03E03) - 21
So the guards Tased him, which, of course, Tased me.
#21 Recap of Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt Season 3 Episode 3 (S03E03) - 22
that he did all that stuff.
#22 Recap of Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt Season 3 Episode 3 (S03E03) - 23 #23 Recap of Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt Season 3 Episode 3 (S03E03) - 24
His mother worked, you know.
#24 Recap of Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt Season 3 Episode 3 (S03E03) - 25
I almost forgot.
#25 Recap of Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt Season 3 Episode 3 (S03E03) - 26
A farmers market, dog park,
#26 Recap of Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt Season 3 Episode 3 (S03E03) - 27 #27 Recap of Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt Season 3 Episode 3 (S03E03) - 28
Oh, God, stop! But thank you for driving electric.
#28 Recap of Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt Season 3 Episode 3 (S03E03) - 29
but today's been a gosh-dang, mother-fudging sugar-show!
#29 Recap of Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt Season 3 Episode 3 (S03E03) - 30 #30 Recap of Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt Season 3 Episode 3 (S03E03) - 31
[applause]
#31 Recap of Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt Season 3 Episode 3 (S03E03) - 32
like your heart got pulled into the wheel well
#32 Recap of Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt Season 3 Episode 3 (S03E03) - 33
and measured our tumbleweed.
#33 Recap of Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt Season 3 Episode 3 (S03E03) - 34
just continue to lie there and not make any sounds at all.
#34 Recap of Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt Season 3 Episode 3 (S03E03) - 35
No, she's coming back.
#35 Recap of Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt Season 3 Episode 3 (S03E03) - 36
by guys who looked real good on paper.
#36 Recap of Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt Season 3 Episode 3 (S03E03) - 37
I'm not stupid, Titus.
#37 Recap of Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt Season 3 Episode 3 (S03E03) - 38
I found a ton of rare nom-noms on the way over and crushed it.
#38 Recap of Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt Season 3 Episode 3 (S03E03) - 39
Don't be ridiculous, Jacqueline.
#39 Recap of Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt Season 3 Episode 3 (S03E03) - 40
Let's get you and Russ married before God takes him.
#40 Recap of Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt Season 3 Episode 3 (S03E03) - 41
Kimberly, Wendy's like a beautiful, rare Barbie
#41 Recap of Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt Season 3 Episode 3 (S03E03) - 42
-I think only you can-- -Stop it!
#42 Recap of Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt Season 3 Episode 3 (S03E03) - 43
[laughter]
#43 Recap of Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt Season 3 Episode 3 (S03E03) - 44
So you gonna marry him or not?
#44 Recap of Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt Season 3 Episode 3 (S03E03) - 45
I know you need the money, but you'll find another way,
#45 Recap of Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt Season 3 Episode 3 (S03E03) - 46
[in Spanish] How long have you been here?
#46 Recap of Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt Season 3 Episode 3 (S03E03) - 47
Yeah, and I'd only be jealous if he married the cab driver from Wings.
#47 Recap of Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt Season 3 Episode 3 (S03E03) - 48
[in Spanish] Never mind.
#48 Recap of Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt Season 3 Episode 3 (S03E03) - 49
And you can't stop me from seeing him
#49 Recap of Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt Season 3 Episode 3 (S03E03) - 50
[sighs]
#50