Aired 6 years ago - Nov 20, 2018
Jim profiles the journey of immigrants preparing to become U.S. citizens, takes the oath with them and offers a sneak peek at his new, more Americanized show.
Aired 6 years ago - Nov 13, 2018
Jim weighs the challenges of living on Mars, sits down with CNN political analyst April Ryan and questions why Americans use so much paper.
Aired 6 years ago - Nov 06, 2018
Jim explains why you probably didn't vote in the midterms, sends a team of correspondents to change minds at Politicon and hosts a debate for third-party longshots.
Aired 6 years ago - Oct 30, 2018
Jim looks at the connection between President Trump's rhetoric and recent violent attacks, scrutinizes smart home technology and delves into the effects of spanking kids.
Aired 6 years ago - Oct 23, 2018
Jim looks at society's obsession with beauty, explains why having a completely healthy lifestyle is impossible and proposes constitutional amendment amendments.
Aired 6 years ago - Oct 16, 2018
Jim explains why Americans struggle to address climate change, looks at the decline of the recycling industry and talks to Kareem Abdul-Jabbar about athlete activism.
{\an1}THIS ONE WAS DRAWN BY JARED
{\an1}AND IT WILL CHANGE BACK AGAIN.
CHANGES BACK!
{\an1}THEY'RE JUST MAKING SO MUCH
YOU CAN'T EAT MONEY.
THAT JOKE'S AMAZING.
{\an1}OUR INSTITUTIONS MAKE DECISIONS,
IF YOU TOLD ME THAT I AND
{\an1}THE PROBLEM OF CLIMATE CHANGE IS
{\an1}IF MY KIDS' KIDS' KIDS WANT TO
FISH GREAT GRANDSON.
{\an1}TO STAY AT TRUMP HOTELS WITH
PROSTITUTES WILL BE TOO
{\an1}I RECYCLE ALL MY CANS, AND IN
RECYCLED MATERIAL THEY'RE
{\an1}LIKE, WE HAVEN'T BEEN DOING IT
{\an1}OF U.S. RECYCLING, BUT NOW OUR
{\an1} CHINA'S ACTUALLY BEEN WARNING
{\an1}WE LET YOU BUILD OUR iPHONES AND
BLUE BINS, THEY'RE OFTEN
{\an1}INTERESTED IN IMPROVING THE WAY
{\an1}HEY, HEY, LOOK, KID, KID, KID,
THE ONES DOING IT BEST?
REUSABLE.
{\an1}VERSION OF THAT JOKE ON EVERY
{\an1}THINKING, WHERE DOES THE CONDOM
{\an1}A BAD IDEA FROM THE GET-GO.
{\an1}STEP-BY-STEP INSTRUCTIONS.
{\an1}THOSE FROM DETERGENT AND FOOD
{\an1}I'M NOT DOING ALL THAT SHIT!
{\an1}AT LEAST WHEN I SEE "WESTWORLD,"
[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ]
{\an1}AND "FORGET PARIS," BUT DID YOU
{\an1} AND TODAY'S BIGGEST SPORTS
{\an1}MOVEMENT, BOYCOTTING THE 1968
LEADING SCORER.
{\an1}OTHER PEOPLE, AND WE'RE STARTING
I CAN DO IT FOR "THE
REBUKE IN THE FORM OF A
AGAIN.
YEAH, YEAH.
SPORTING HEROES.
AUSTRALIA, SO.
{\an1}BIT COMPLAINT -- COMPLACENT.
YEAH, YEAH, YEAH.
{\an1} FOR A WHILE, M.J. HAD THE HIP
{\an1}HE'S PUNCHING YOU IN THE HEAD
OF "VERONICA MARS"?
YOU DO IT LIKE THAT.
Aired 6 years ago - Oct 09, 2018
Jim looks at Brett Kavanaugh's self-proclaimed victimhood, British knowledge of American politics and the idiocy of gender reveal parties.
INNOCENT.
{\an1}THIS IS A VERY, VERY -- THIS IS
{\an1}BETWEEN MY FINGERS JUST IN CASE.
{\an1}MAKES IT EVEN MORE PAINFUL.
{\an1}SURE, A HATE GATHERING LED TO
{\an1}WERE THE VICTIM OF A PLANE
{\an1}THEY'RE THE VICTIMS WHENEVER GAY
JIM.
{\an1} NO, MEANS YES HERE AT WHO'S
HERE.
YEAH, NICE WORK NOT
{\an1}SHE REPLIED HAPPY HOLIDAYS.
{\an1}AND GET THIS WOMAN A BRAND NEW
DOLLAR MEDIA OUTLET.
{\an1}MUSICIAN AND SLAVERY APOLOGIST,
{\an1}CAST, THE CREW, THE AUDIENCE AND
{\an1}I FEEL LIKE I'M BEING -- I'M THE
{\an1} DON'T WORRY ABOUT IT, THAT
{\an1}TEACHING A TEXAS IMMIGRANT CHILD
[ PHONE RINGING ]
{\an1}PICK UP YOUR [ BLEEP ] PHONE.
{\an1}I'M SORRY, I DIDN'T MEAN TO --
{\an1}EVERY TIME THERE'S A BIG VOTE
BADLY TRAINED DOGS.
{\an1}WHY ARE WE SPENDING SO MUCH
MESSAGES.
{\an1}THAT WAY, ALL THE GOOD SENATORS
{\an1}CHUCK GRASSLEY, CAN I HAVE SOME
{\an1}I DECIDED TO PUT THEM TO A TEST,
OKAY, FIRST QUESTION.
I THINK HE WAS A CLOTHING
{\an1}AND LET'S SEE IF ENGLAND CAN DO
{\an1}ONE OF MY WRITERS HAD TO TELL ME
{\an1}REMEMBER HIS FACE, I DON'T
IT'S "HORRIBLE BOSSES."
{\an1}KNOW, I USED TO LIVE INSIDE MY
THE BIG DOG, JOE BIDEN.
{\an1}IN ENGLAND, BOTTOM SNOGGER.
{\an1}SECOND QUARTER, THIRD QUARTER?
{\an1}BUT SADLY MY SHOWER IS FILLED
{\an1} WHY DO THE BRITS KNOW SO MUCH
POSH TO KNOW AN AMERICAN
STARTING TO COME OUT.
{\an1}SO AMERICANS DEFINITELY DO KNOW
{\an1} THEY FAVOR CORPORATIONS MORE.
{\an1}AMERICA MIGHT NOT KNOW WHO
AMERICANS ARE PRETTY --
Aired 6 years ago - Oct 02, 2018
Jim breaks down California's attempt to reform the cash bail system, looks at the racial disparities in criminal sentencing and gets insight into the 2018 midterm elections.
WAIT, WAIT, WAIT A MINUTE.
I CAN'T BURN EVERYTHING.
STATE TO ELIMINATE CASH BAIL.
AND WHITES WERE TWICE AS LIKELY
SWIRL CHOCOLATE AND VANILLA.
THE CONES.
>> BAD GUYS BACK ON THE STREETS?
I LOVE BEER!
CALIFORNIA, THIS WILL COST YOU
NO.
AND WHEN YOU DO WHAT YOU LOVE
THE EXTREME RACIAL BIAS OF
♪
TO THREE TO TEN YEARS IN PRISON
COSBY IS THE JACKIE ROBINSON OF
LITTLE PRISON HAPPY, ESPECIALLY
THING.
OF COURSE THERE'S RACIAL BIAS!
SHOOTS YOU, AND THEN THERE'S NO
STRUGGLING FINANCIALLY.
AND CALCULATED ACCORDINGLY.
SPEEDING TICKETS!
HEY.
JUDGE ISSUES A LIGHTER SENTENCE.
I'M NOT SAYING THAT I'M NOT
SENTENCE, BUT NOT EVERY CRIMINAL
TO DO THAT.
HEY, HE'S STILL GOT TO FIND HIS
THESE VIDEOS ARE MEANT TO BE
HE ONLY TARGETED BOYS, LIKE
HE'S LIKE SHOULD BE APPLAUDED
TWO-THIRDS OF A THING IS MOST.
♪
GAMES, TURN ON YOUR CABLE NEWS
IT MAY AFFECT WHETHER THE RUSSIA
I HIT THE BAR AND FOUND THESE
>> >> I THINK THE DEMOCRATS ARE
THERE IS A HIGH NUMBER OF
THE ELECTION YEAR, MUCH LESS IN
JAPAN'S TINY ELECTION IS BY LAW
STILL HAVE SOME UNDECIDED
MAKES PEOPLE HATE THE
ENCORE, DO ANOTHER ONE.
THEN HE GOES, "NEWS TO ME."
CLINTON PLAYED THE SAXOPHONE A
PRIVATE, BUT WHEN SHE DID THE,
DO YOU BRING IN JOKE WRITERS,
CONDITIONS?
Aired 6 years ago - Sep 25, 2018
Jim questions the GOP's unwavering support for Supreme Court nominee Brett Kavanaugh, dissects America's obsession with work and meets a nudist fighting for religious freedom.
OF US, I THINK.
VEGAS CURED CANCER IS LIKE, I'VE
SENATE CALENDARS HE KEPT FROM
THE DNA MATCHES AND THE
MAYBE YOUR SISTER WILL TALK TO
PRESIDENT MAY NOT BE INDICTED
IMAGINE IF YOU COULD GET RID OF
WITHDRAWN FOR WAY LESS.
FORGET ALLEGATIONS OF SEXUAL
AT HIS CALENDAR WE'D -- OH, NO.
THE GOP MAY BE ABLE TO OVERLOOK
WAS A GIRAFFE KEEPER AT THE ZOO.
LET'S FOUND OUT IN OUR SEGMENT,
WHY IS IT CALLED A WORK ETHIC?
HE ALWAYS MAKES THEM FIT.
INDUSTRIALIZED NATIONS.
THE 40 HOUR WORKWEEK IS MAKING
OF OUR INSANELY INTENSE WORK
QUARTER.
COMPANIES AROUND THE WORLD ARE
ARE REDUCED BY 7%, 78% OF
HOW MUCH WORK DO THEY REALLY
WHAT IS FOUR PEBBLES PLUS FOUR
THE WAY AMERICANS OVERWORK
THOUGH I'M OKAY WITH THAT, TO BE
YOURSELF AT WORK, YOU'RE DOING
WE HAVE TO KEEP OCTOBER AND
AN 8 DAY WEEK, WE'LL MAKE ONE
SHIFT WORKERS, BUT YOU CHOSE TO
WE'LL BE RIGHT BACK.
SOMEONE ELSE'S PERSONAL
ON JUDEO-CHRISTIAN VALUES.
EXPECT AN ATTACK, HAWAII.
>> NOT A CHRISTIAN, A
>> IT'S MY RELIGION, AND IT'S
RUSHED TO AMY'S DEFENSE.
>> I HEAR YOU INVENTED THE WORD
THANKS FOR THE COMPLIMENT HONEY,
CHASED OUT OF THE PUBLIC SQUARE.
>> THE PROBLEM IS, IS SHE USING
THERE WAS PROBABLY .
WE DO TOPLESS TACO TUESDAYS.
COULD BE.
>> THEY'RE ING EACH
WITH.
FUN OF MUSLIMS.
VALID THAN NATURALISM.
AND ISN'T JEFF SESSIONS
Aired 6 years ago - Sep 18, 2018
Jim breaks down Nike's controversial ad campaign featuring Colin Kaepernick, describes Hollywood's diversity problem and takes a ride with Amsterdam police officers.
Aired 6 years ago - Aug 28, 2018
Jim unpacks the Trump administration's religious liberty task force, gets insight from religious followers worldwide and chats with a diverse group of religious leaders.
to the persons
they have to do it for.
but now the Department
of Justice is embracing them.
{\an1}And I know what you're thinking.
{\an1}who believe in using prayer for
healing instead of medical care.
Even the guys
who wrote the Bible
{\an1}they could make even churchier.
that by sending away
all the religious zealots,
America needs to be a
religiously segregated country.
with no medicines
like whatever they sprinkle
on doughnut kebabs.
and having awkward sex,
I imagine.
[ Cheers and applause ]
{\an1}Unless you change the channel
{\an1}It seems to be the one thing
it's the new home
of the American Embassy.
...and a very good boy
named Jared.
but I'm open
to suggestions here.
that step one
to solving religious strife
So we're on the same page,
here, mostly. Okay.
Are you just, like, a guy
we picked up off the street?
has recognized
that Jerusalem
This is where God created
the world from.
-Or it could be made up.
-No. No.
and he said there was
good people on both sides.
gay-hating, uterus-controlling
family values.
Well, uh,
am I a good man?
I'll take his virgins.
He gets virgins in his religion.
-Yeah. I'm going to hell?
-Of course.
You haven't got a tree
and decorations
Day two, half a shoe.
I don't believe
in any of that shit,
-Yes.
-That one's stupid, yeah.
to tell me why religion
even exists at all.
if there was no God.
I don't believe you
should murder people.
Why not be one?
countries with the highest
murder rates in the world
When they can't reach adults,
they aim younger.
My son, at 4, has to pledge
to the flag under one God.
Noah put two of each animal
onto a great, big boat.
because you're not ready.
Australia, where Christianity
is substantially less.
and they believe
in vice versa.
and the truth of it and they
believe it, they're converted.
Well, it's one of the biggest
questions there is.
And their children are
parentless down here, crying,
Nah!
Still not buying it.
I'd even consider going
to heaven and hanging out
Aired 6 years ago - Aug 21, 2018
Jim questions the logic behind modern marriage, breaks down America's tradition of tipping in the service industry and chats with QAnon experts.
Aired 6 years ago - Aug 14, 2018
Jim recaps the alt-right's Unite the Right 2 rally, unpacks Donald Trump's chaotic presidency and responds to suggestions that he should stop talking about politics.
THAT WAS ACTUALLY FROM HIS
WAS JUST A BIT MORE ENCOURAGING.
I ALMOST PITY JASON KESSLER JUST
NATIONALIST WEDDING TO GO TO
DARREN IS A SKINHEAD!
PEOPLE IN OUR OWN SIDE, WITHIN
THE ALT-RIGHT WOULD WANT TO
THAT WENT HORRIBLY WRONG FOR
I KNOW IT'S DRAMATIC TO REFER TO
YOU COULDN'T BUILD AN AUTOBAHN.
AND YOU GUYS HAVE THIS.
NAZI WOULD EV DO, THAT'S LIKE
BY ANY METRIC THE ALT-RIGHT IS A
OH, YEAH, WE POKE FUN AT BOTH
MOST DAYS MY BODY IS A PILE OF
A LEARN -- LIGHTNESS.
TRUMP.
THE RUSSIAN LAWYER THAT HE
DONE ALL THE TIME IN POLITICS,
AGAIN, TAKE TRUMP'S CABINET.
>> A PATTERN OF GRIFTING.
$120 MILLION?
IT'S A SENSATION THAT I CALL
HERE'S ANOTHER EXAMPLE.
PROPERLY UTILIZED, IS BEING
HE CAN'T YOU!
SUPPLIED FROM A KITCHEN SINK 20
>> ASBESTOS IS BANNED IN DOZENS
ASBESTOS!
VERSUS A PRO-ASBESTOS CANDIDATE!
WTC HAD ASBESTOS, IT WOULDN'T
MAYBE THE BEST WAY TO DESCRIBE
POINTS AND YOU SAY, WHAT, YOU
IN A WAY, WE'RE ALL TRAPPED IN A
♪
THE SHOW PEOPLE HAVE BEEN
WHO CAN GET MARRIED AND WHO
♪
HANDS IN AUSTRALIA.
>> I'M A DIGGER OPERATOR.
>> IT MIGHT BE A FEMALE MINER.
>> WHAT DOES THAT MEAN?
>> OH, YEAH.
RIGHT?
>> NO, NO, NO, I BROUGHT
IT'S ALL POLITICS!
HE'S BEEN A REPUBLICAN DO OR
♪
Aired 6 years ago - Aug 07, 2018
Jim explores the debate over 3D-printed guns, breaks down the TSA's plans to relax airport security and sits down with Representative Barbara Lee.
CONSTANTLY SHAKE?
PEOPLE ARE AFRAID OF WERE
DRIVE DRUNKER!
A GROUP IS SUING TO TAKE THE
AVAILABLE FOR A LONG TIME.
ON DVD, BUT GEORGE LUCAS ADDED
BAR OF SOAP AT THE FARMERS'
I CAN'T FUNCTION.
ALREADY?
PRINTABLE GUNS.
WEREN'T WE SUPPOSED TO BE LIVING
ROSEANNE, YOU SHOULD TWEET THAT!
ANYWAY.
ABOUT THESE PLASTIC GUNS, RATHER
*
ON THEM AT ANY TIME.
SCREENINGS AT MORE THAN 150 OF
60 SEATS OR FEWER.
KILLING 60 PEOPLE IN A PLANE
COME HERE.
CLASSIFIED, BUT SOURCES SAY IN
ALL MEANS GET RID OF THE TSA, NO
ALWAYS THINK, OH MY GOD, THAT IS
IT ALL FIGURES.
WE FACE SECURITY THEATER AT
GOING THROUGH THE SECURITY LINE
SO ONCE YOU TAKE UP SKYDIVING OR
DROWNING IN THE BATH THAN A
HE COULD GIVE ME A PAT DOWN.
TO AT LEAST FEEL SECURE.
WE DO HAVE A STRICT, NO
SO HERE'S THE JIM JEFFERIES
AS THE MIDTERMS APPROACH, A
HONESTLY, I WANT TO SAY WHAT'S
BEEN TURNING HEADS.
EXCELLENCE.
FIRST OF ALL, YOUR BUTTON.
ABOUT DONALD TRUMP, AND SHE'S ON
OUT OF OUR BUSINESS.
>> LET'S HOPE --
MAYBE TO HELP HER SNIFF OUT GOP
>> THE I.C.E. RAIDERS, THEY
THING?
>> OH MY GOD.
>> I TELL YOU, THAT'S FEISTY.
SHE'S PULLED IT DOWN LIKE THIS,
>> YOUR KIDS WATCHING RIGHT NOW
Aired 6 years ago - Jul 31, 2018
Jim breaks down the consequences of controversial tweets from the past, questions why Americans are so unhappy and explores the growing movement to end circumcision.
THE RACIST AND HOMOPHOBIC TWEETS
YOU'VE NEVER MADE A MISTAKE AS A
IN A LOT OF CASES WE DON'T
YOU SEE ACTIVATION IN THE
BUT APPARENTLY WHEN OTHER PEOPLE
BUT THOSE EXAMPLES AREN'T THE
YOU DIDN'T HEAR TOO MANY PEOPLE
IF OUR ENTIRE PAST IS FAIR GAME
>> SCAPEGOATING IS ANOTHER THING
I DON'T THINK ANYONE HAS DONE
EVERYTHING ON SCAPEY HERE.
AND THAT'S WHY WE'RE SETTING HIM
DOING MUSIC ANYMORE.
IT WAS SUPPOSED TO BE LIFE,
>> THE DATA SHOW THAT CHASING
SADDER.
POSSIBLE CONVENIENCE, WE'RE
SOCIAL MEDIA IS BUILT ON A LIE.
SHE DIED TRYING TO TAKE A SELFIE
>> TEENS WHO USE ELECTRONIC
>> FACE-TO-FACE INTERACTION IS
SADNESS AND DEPRESSION AT TIMES.
HASH TAG AWW.
THE TRUTH IS, IF YOU'RE NOT
UNHAPPY AS BEFORE THEY WENT TO
WANT TO TELL YOU THAT YOU'RE NOT
CARE SYSTEM, HIGH GUN VIOLENCE,
THE ONLY WAY TO BE TRULY
IT CAN BE GREAT, IT GIFT YOU
I'M NOT INTERESTED IN YOU
CAN YOU PLEASE TEXT ME SOMETIME?
>>> WELCOME BACK, BITCH -- STOR
MOVEMENT IS GAINING GROUND.
GUILTY OF CHILD ABUSE.
MUCH, THEY PUT IT IN A HANDBOOK.
>> CUT THE DICK OFF AT 99?
NOT TO MENTION YOU LOWER THE
INTACTIVENESS.
JUST SO WE PUT IT OUT THERE.
>> THEY'RE MADE IN AMERICA,
CONVINCED THAT CALLING PEOPLE
>> THE REACTION OF CIRCUMCISED
CUSTOMER SIZED.
DONE, YOU'VE RUINED MY DICK FOR
>> THE SKIN WILL STRETCH AND
>> NOW I'M DEPRESSED ABOUT MY
SHIT IF YOU LIKE.
EVERYONE.
>> IT'S NOT SO MUCH I'M AGAINST
Aired 6 years ago - Jul 24, 2018
Jim explores reports of Amazon's questionable workplace conditions, breaks down America's love of billionaires and unravels the backlash against comic diversity at Comic-Con.
RECENTLY LIKE THIS LYNCHING DECAL, BECAUSE
LET BE HONEST, IT WILL BE ON A TRACK.
MAYBE THEY'RE PUTTING IN TWO
CONTACTS SIMULTANEOUSLY.
THIS MAKES ME NEVER WANT TO SHOP
AT AMAZON AGAIN!
IF YOU CAN TELL ME ANOTHER WAY TO
GET SOCKS, I'D LIKE TO HEAR IT.
FACEBOOK IS BRIMMING WITH HATE
SPEECH.
THESE COMPANIES ARE PART OF OUR
DAILY LIVES.
RIGHTS IN ORDER TO ADVOCATE FOR
HUMAN RIGHTS.
A SERIAL KILLER.
BUT I LOVE CHICK-FIL-A.
I DON'T KNOW WHAT IT IS ABOUT
PLUS ANY TIME I EAT THERE, I
WELL.
DONATE TO WILDLIFE CONSERVATION.
OR IT WON'T, YOU DON'T CARE.
WHATEVER YOU THINK ABOUT TETHIC
>> KYLIE JENNER, THE 20-YEAR-OLD
IMMEDIATELY KNOW THE NAMES OF
ALTHOUGH I DID ADD A LITTLE
SO I'LL SAY THIS TO KYLIE
FRANCHISE FOR DOGS OR WHATEVER
BILLIONAIRE IS TO DO ONE OF TWO
NO, EVERY BILLIONAIRE
DEEP DOWN WE KNOW BILLIONAIRES
CAN BE SUCCESSFUL.
>> SINCE 1979, A 200% RISE OF
THAT'S WHY HOLDING UP KYLIE
"FORBES" CAN OFF WITH
HER HOW TO COOK SO SHE WOULDN'T
MAKE UP FOR 50% OF HER INSTAGRAM
NOW MARVEL AND D.C. ARE BRINGING
>> WHY USED TO BE?
DON'T GO AROUND AND PARADE WHAT
BROADCASTS FROM A SECRET
>> WHO IS THIS EVIL MASTERMIND
>> COMICS ARE KIND OF WEIRDLY
>> MS. MARVEL WAS INTRODUCED AS
>> MYER SAYS ANYONE WHO SUPPORTS
THE CONVERSATION.
"THE KING OF QUEENS" I ASSUME?
YOU LIKE A LOT, IT CREATES THIS
OBJECTIFY JUST TO SATISFY
>> THE THING WITH COMICS IS
>> I MIGHT BE SUPERMAN.
ONLY PROTECTS GATED COMMUNITIES.
>> BLACK PANTHER'S VILLAIN,
>> PERMITMONGER.
LOOK, WE HIRED THIS OVERWEIGHT
WAY INTO THE COMIC INDUSTRY.
THAT YOU'RE A RACIST OR
Aired 6 years ago - Jul 17, 2018
Jim questions America's obsession with greatness, tackles toxic masculinity, chats with the king of curmudgeon comedians, Bill Burr, and gives his thoughts on FIFA's protest over TV cameras ogling the female spectators.
Aired 6 years ago - Jul 10, 2018
Jim questions the wisdom of having a Supreme Court, examines Scott Pruitt’s environmentally destructive last act as EPA chief and investigates the state of Irish drinking.
{\an1}UNIVERSITY OF CHICAGO LOOKED AT
THE 20 MOST SIGNIFICANT SUPREME
MY GRANDFATHER HAS BEEN GOING TO
THE SAME MEXICAN RESTAURANT
SO BY THE TIME THEY DIE OR
RETIRE, THEY REALLY ARE
A BUNCH OF GEEZERS WHO ARE SO
READY TO DIE, THEY DON'T GIVE A
I WANT THESE FETUSES TO KNOW THE
TORTURE OF OLD AGE!
{\an1}BECAUSE HE'S NOT A GOOD PERSON.
{\an1}HE WAS IN TOUCH WITH THE YOUTH.
HAVE.
IN FACT, LET'S GET RID OF THE
SUPREME COURT JUSTICES
{\an1}YOU GET A LETTER IN THE MAIL,
BOOM, YOU'RE A SUPREME COURT
CHANGING.
{\an1}AND I IMMEDIATELY WISHED AMERICA
WOULD START A NEW WAR SO ALL THE
{\an1} SCOTT PRUITT IS OUT AS
OF THE ENVIRONMENTAL PROTE AGENCY.
{\an1}CHAMBER, LEFT THE KEYS UNDE
FORMER COAL AND CHEMICAL
ACTUALLY GET S HHT DONE.
{\an1}BUT ON HIS WAY OUT THE DOO
{\an1}IT'S NOT LIKE THERE'S AN I
{\an1}CONTAINS 1.8 TRILLION PIEC
IT WAS FINE.
{\an1} THE FULL VIDEO IS ACTUA
{\an1}THE COFFEE CHAIN ANNOUNCIN
{\an1}SIDE TO THE DESTRUCTION OF
INTO THE OCEAN.
THEIR SHELL.
{\an1}EVEN SMALL CONCENTRATIONS
{\an1}YOU A QUESTION, DO YOU FIN
{\an1}BUT IF WE'RE KILLING ALL OA
{\an1}ESTABLISHED TO DELIVER ADDE
AND WE HERE AT "THE JIM
NO -- A GREAT CAUSE.
AND PEOPLE LIVE LONGER WHEN THEY
DRINK.
IRELAND.
{\an1}WILLING TO GIVE UP SO EASILY.
OF A LAUGH, A BIT OF SLAGGING.
TO THE AMERICANS WATCHING,
DIFFERENT EVERY DAY.
YOU MANAGE A PUB?
THE AVERAGE DRINKER IS
CONSUMING ABOUT A BOTTLE OF
{\an1} I SAT DOWN WITH ALEX WRIGHT,
THE MAN WHO WROTE THE BILL, FOR
WE WANT TO CURTAIL ALCOHOL
ADVERTISEMENT AND SPONSORSHIPS
WATER --
INSTEAD OF PAIRING ALCOHOL
AH, HERE WE GO, THE PERFECT
IRISH BEER AD.
[ BLEEP ] WANT TO DO, SIMPLE AS
THAT.
WHEN I WASN'T EATING AND
DRINKING I WAS MISERABLE.
REALLY FUN.
YEAH, REALLY.
YOU'RE THE ONLY ONE THAT'S
SHOT IT.
{\an1} YOU POPULATED MY COUNTRY?
I CAN'T SMELL PITT YOU WILL
IN A SECOND.
WHEN I WALKED INTO THE BAR, I
DIDN'T SEE HOW BEAUTIFUL YOU
Aired 6 years ago - Jun 26, 2018
Jim slams President Trump's immigration policies, talks with a former social worker who's seen their effects and explains why Russia is an inhospitable World Cup host.
You were actually saying
you're taking them to bathe.
[ Laughter ]
I was wrong to compare the Trump
administration to Nazis.
They know Mom and Dad.
{\an8}And yo make his point,
he held an event
Look --
here's a press conference
trying to have sex
with a vacuum.
{\an8}Man: So much of the exodus
across the U.S. border
Their choices are possible
family separation or death.
Then, by all means,
detain children.
That's why Tiffany Trump
is a Crip now.
is Obama's policy was harsh,
but Trump's is cruel.
This has to be
the dumbest group of racists
Answer me this.
[ Cheers and applause ]
But it's something else entirely
to be there in person
{\an8} It depends who you ask.
{\an8} She doesn't know any
African-Americans.
{\an8} But two weeks ago,
Davidson resigned,
{\an1}The official term is "tender
age." That means under 12.
Now you got to imagine
you're hearing that
in every other room,
on these what are called
CPI holds --
{\an1}and you hold both of their arms,
physically grabbing them.
and sell televisions
and stuff like that.
even through the night
for another shift.
{\an1}Basically, these three
Brazilian siblings came.
{\an1}So I had to first calm him down
and say, "Your mom is alive."
{\an1}So when they found out that
they were gonna be separated,
He's -- "How?
How can I be strong?
What do you say to people
who say that these people
at children being torn away
from their parents --
And I remember thinking, "Oh,
those were the good old days."
"As a matter of policy,
we do not comment
Moving on to something a little
lighter -- the World Cup!
It's full of great travel tips
like where to eat.
[ Cheers and applause ]
In fact,
their version of "Queer Eye"
So during halftime,
make sure you enjoy the new
There's also its
infectious spirit of racism.
And Russian bananas
are even more insulting
A racism inspector!
I saw black man
walking down street,
Okay, yes,
Russia is not a great place
{\an1}most notorious soccer hooligans.
All right.
You're not gonna tell me
and rolling around,
at least kiss each other.
Russia, you should embrace
having gay people.
Aired 6 years ago - Jun 19, 2018
Jim examines the president's penchant for picking fights with U.S. allies, sits down with controversial lecturer Jordan Peterson and talks free speech with Sarah Silverman.
{\an8}He ran it --
Very few people at that age.
and continuing to
starve your own people...
{\an8}Woman: The so-called
Trump Doctrine. What's that?
Why can't Trump just pick
an inconsequential country
instead of [bleep] up
relationships with
the rest of the world.
{\an1}a super-handsome Trudeau-esque
prime minister to piss him off.
I wish I was that guy.
because they swell up
whenever I walk around."
his net worth is exactly 10 more
dollars than Donald Trump's.
Trump would hate this
fictional country so much!
{\an8}calling him weak on trade,
weak on military, and "stupid."
{\an1}I hear Skarsgaard's doctrine
is "You're a bitch, America."
{\an8}Tweet at Trump with
"#IAmSharapovia"
But the battleground
may surprise you.
Two years ago, he was
an unknown psychology professor
{\an8}I proposed a bill in Canada
that made use of people's
{\an8} So they protested his classes,
called him a Nazi,
Do you think, with
what people call you,
{\an7}1.5 million hits later,
this has become a huge issue.
{\an1} Hate groups like the alt-right
The alt-right,
neo-Nazis, KKK.
And he also seems to enjoy
being a bit provocative.
is she will say anything
if she thinks it's funny.
for language that I detest.
{\an1} Especially on college campuses.
They set up P.A. systems
with white noise.
is stifling free speech
in any way?
Making people bake a cake
for a gay wedding.
{\an1}where they said, black people,
you have to serve them
Maybe it's not.
Maybe it's not different.
{\an1}The line betwee--
and it's affecting
lots of comedians.
{\an7} So, coming up, we talk with
{\an8} So, does hating
political correctness
{\an7}Oh, yeah. Good. Oh, yay. It's
called "I Love You, America."
{\an3}by the pronoun
of their choice.
The college kids sit at the back
of the room with air horns,
Yeah, have some questions
and then maybe a little bit
And those pussies
are easy to get upset.
I just want to
get out of jury duty."
{\an1}Well, none of my jokes
were from a racist place.
{\an1}.And then I go, "I can't
say 'dirty Jew' or 'kike'
and things are always
progressing.
{\an3}a lot of terrible
rape gags.
{\an1}Well, that's what they call
"mouthful of blood" laughs.
It's not like,
"Well, now I'm older
Docking.
So, you need two dicks.
-Oh, it sticks?! The suction.
-Yeah, it sticks.
Aired 6 years ago - May 29, 2018
Jim questions the public demand for insincere apologies, meets a scientist at the forefront of sex robot technology, and weights the pros and cons of gene editing.
not "white apologizing
like a little bitch."
Announcer:
We know the value of trust.
"Not where the story ends.
It's where it starts again."
It would be a shame if one of
them was to fall down a well...
And we got to know the friends
of our friends.
Facebook can't even do the
It doesn't matter
what Facebook says.
{\an8}to undermine democracy
that we live in.
No. He doesn't.
If you're powerful,
there are no consequences.
send them a card saying...
See, there's no problem
that can't be fixed
Welcome back.
Jefferies: Around the world,
automation and robots
Factory workers.
You know the answer.
{\an8} But for one industry,
the future is now.
Dr. Sergi Santos.
{\an1}How close are you
to this project?
{\an8} More and more men want
full-time companions,
She's not telling me
I'm not perfect.
They're taking jobs.
But if it is, sorry.
Thank you for
being on my show.
-Fokken.
-The Fokkens.
Circumcised
or uncircumcised?
Nay!
so I could see what modern
companionship means to him.
{\an8} I see everything,
even our future.
{\an8}-really took the mood away.
-I don't think so.
{\an8} I'll be your slave,
for tonight.
it's that you don't give up
until they give in.
[ Laughter ]
there's just no substitute
[ Cheers and applause ]
They're hoping that someday
doctors might be able
In other news, North Korea
might stop testing bang-bangs
{\an1}to create virus-free piglets.
[ Laughter ]
medical advancement,
it's going to cost you.
if the child is in remission
at one month.
and we'll give you
a full refund.
for the BioHack the Planet
conference.
because you shouldn't
"play God."
being eaten by
a sabertooth tiger.
Woman: The code for how
smallpox can be made,
Aired 6 years ago - May 22, 2018
Jim breaks down a recent wave of racial profiling incidents, chats with comedian W. Kamau Bell about being profiled and looks at how bogus support animals undermine real ones.
We don't know
what she's been through.
"We'll be back for ya!"
Yeah. See?
That one's on you, black people.
{\an1}or moving into a new apartment
the complaint
would have had merit.
to solve racism
in a six-minute segment.
Still...
{\an1}then you get a one-star rating.
Maybe you can't enjoy
any part of black culture,
[ Laughter ]
{\an1}that you're a registered racist.
But, uhh, it gets worse.
the Emmy Award-winning CNN show
"United Shades of America."
{\an3}I'm making sure
to smile and wave.
{\an1}Yeah. It's like you're
waving with two hands.
{\an8}Basically, on my birthday,
I was kicked out of a café
{\an3}which legally
you're able to do.
are tossing the racism
back at people quickly.
To fix racism for real,
it takes a structural --
{\an1}See how comfortable I was
when you touched me?
{\an1}You've seen that woman.
She wasn't hard to chase down.
If you publicly shame somebody,
it really means something.
That's a common thing?
[ Applause ]
{\an1}And these are things that
apply for swimming-pool rules.
{\an3}are black and brown
people.
{\an1}but you're not born racist.
Ladies and gentlemen,
W. Kamau Bell.
Welcome back.
her emotional support peacock
on an airplane.
the heavy lifting
for your shit personality.
a vagina in yoga pants
is called a camel toe?"
that only dogs
can be service animals.
However, almost any animal
They make us feel good.
Passing a pet off as a service
animal can actually threaten
{\an1}and now he has to go to extremes
Well, guess what!
That's all of us!
{\an1}Isn't that right, cameraman 2?
Woman: This woman
pretends to be blind
Like, what's the dog
supposed to do? Bark orders?
There's no certification
required
a person can bring
on any one flight.
NO! NO, IT WON'T!
There isn't even a central
registry to...these animals.
It's horrible that people
can take advantage
featuring a photo
that we uploaded
He is doubly
emotionally supportive.
Aired 6 years ago - May 15, 2018
Jim explains why torture is simply wrong, seeks answers about the British Royal family and looks for a middle ground between helicopter parenting and neglect.
and are able to hate them
for who they are on the inside.
I support
the higher moral standard
D-Did you see that?!
I support the drug laws
of this country."
Trump told us he's
all about torturing people.
{\an1}so that we can better compete.
First of all, I couldn't
have done it without rope.
They're about what kind of moral
standard we hold ourselves to.
came from nonabusive
interrogation tactics.
So I learned the quickest way
to make him stop
Sure, they drowned
a lot of innocent people,
then it's worth it.
Would it be worth
killing all those babies
We'll be right back.
from the kids
that she loves the most --
I was made to do the same thing
when John Denver came.
is obsessed with
the British royal family.
{\an8} Next up, Thomas J.
Mace-Archer-Mills, Esq.
when he's not at his day job,
teaching magicians manners.
That was spinach and feta
in, like, a roll.
We all agree -- No one
wants Charles, do they?
I've been watching him.
I don't think he's gonna
make a good king.
The Royal Train?
Is it true that the Queen
drinks four cocktails a day?
That means that she's
a complete alcoholic.
{\an1} Just because they're a product
Because it is
old-fashioned.
Can you hold my medal?
Because...
Yeah. I really want to shove
one of those in my mouth.
they actually boost
annual tourism revenue
{\an1}and she's marrying the world's
most eligible royal bachelor.
That was the thing that
you couldn't fault Diana on,
-Now?
-Yeah, now.
having something that
brings them a little joy.
{\an1}Pip pip! We'll be right back.
Woman:
One state is standing by the
concept of free-range parenting.
Utah needed a law to stop people
from calling Child Services
They didn't even notice
if I came home
[ Laughter ]
in strollers unattended
while Mum and Dad run errands.
They'll say, "No,
you can't do it."
I'd let my kid play there
with his friends.
and soon-to-be parents.
But not so much that
they totally ruin their lives.
ages 11, 8, 5, 2 --
Of course he stumbled!
Uh, I'm gonna go with
the PlayStation.
like a [bleep] hobo.
For example...
Aired 6 years ago - May 08, 2018
Jim looks at all the ways the NFL mistreats its cheerleaders, chats with Carol Burnett about the state of comedy and refutes conservative hysteria over asylum-seekers.
How bad did one girl
screw up eating soup
filed a lawsuit
and attempted to unionize.
Of course, they don't change
their tampons often enough.
That airtime is worth
$8.25 million per season.
Look. I think
football is stupid.
They shouldn't be exploited
by their teams.
professional cheerleading squad
in the country.
And they're allowed to date
anyone on the staff, even me!
Thank you, the Jim Jefferettes.
We'll be right back.
{\an1}It took someone very special
No one can escape the
sunken place of Donald Trump.
of Vietnam, Watergate,
and the Civil Rights Movement,
Thank you, Carol Burnett,
for being on my show.
And a lot of comedy that
was happening at that time
And I think that
might be the reason
Then he tweets something
stupid. I'm like,
-They probably text it.
-[ Laughs ] Yeah.
would not pass the
political-correctness test now?
The fat people would
be offended by that?
Yeah.
{\an3}Yeah, and you were
a pioneer.
{\an1}But what I would do back then,
if the sketch wasn't working,
[ Laughs ]
{\an1}After lunch, put a couple
of sketches on their feet.
I didn't think I was
gonna get one out of ya!
I think it's being able to
deliver something absurd
Maybe I don't have to
talk about the news.
Check out Carol Burnett's
hilarious new show,
Welcome back.
The migrant caravan --
mostly women and children,
to make such
an impossible journey --
But things in this country
have become
Imagine a group of 300
angry stampeding, um,
Although, their nappies
are filled with cocaine.
These families, often women
and small children, are victims.
might be exposed to clean water,
employment, and education?
women are raped at levels
that nobody's ever seen before.
"They're not good,
Mr. President."
so they can apply for
refugee status. That's legal.
{\an1}And to them, I say, well said.
I remember it well.
and made that harrowing journey
here with Qantas.
[ Normal voice ] Yes, obviously
my accent has softened.
And despite what the right says
about immigrants bringing crime,
but I have killed onstage.
These migrants are survivors
seeking a better life.
Aired 6 years ago - May 01, 2018
Jim has questions about the seemingly positive developments out of North Korea and South Korea, examines the toxic culture of "incels" and checks in with his weatherman.
{\an1}ARE YOU SURE ABOUT THAT?
{\an1}YOU GO INTO ALL THIS TROUBLE,
{\an1}PEACE.
{\an1}THE TABLE WITH THE WORLD'S
{\an1}THEY CALL THEIR NUCLEAR ARSENAL
{\an1}WE HAVE A SENSIBLE NAME FOR IT.
{\an1}PRIVATELY SKEPTICAL ABOUT THAT
{\an1}THAT'S REALLY A VAT OF SOUP AND
{\an1}THEY'RE HEMORRHOIDS THAT HAVE
{\an1} IF THE MEETING WHEN I'M THERE
{\an1} WAIT, WAIT.
{\an1}UNDERCOATING AND FLOOR MATS.
{\an1} THE REASON WHY OBAMA, BUSH,
{\an1}BUT TRUMP HAS ONE SECRET WEAPON
{\an1}IT'S VERY POSSIBLE THAT TRUMP
{\an1}BUT TRUMP COULD ACTUALLY MAKE
{\an1}SOUNDS GOOD.
{\an1} WELCOME BACK.
{\an1} INVESTIGATORS SHARED THIS
{\an1}DEPTHS OF THE INTERNET ARE THE
{\an1}THAT'S HIM AT 4.
{\an1}BOARDS LIKE 4 CHAN AND 8 CHAN TO
{\an1}WAIT, ALL HER FRIENDS ARE
{\an1}IT'S NOT A MOVIE I WOULD WATCH.
{\an1}MISOGYNISTIC ASSHOLES WHO
{\an1}ONLINE HISTORY WITHIN THE INCEL
{\an1}OR USING ALL THAT PENT-UP
{\an1}THEY HAVE THEIR OWN TERMINOLOGY
{\an1}I CALL IT NADS AR TO.
{\an1}AFRICA CALLED CHAD.
{\an1}LAW CENTER ADDED INCELS TO THEIR
{\an1}MOTHER'S BRA, I WAS HOLDING IT
{\an1}YOU'RE NOT OWED ANYTHING.
{\an1}AND RUN OVER PEOPLE.
{\an1}IT'S AMAZING WHAT A SKILL SET
{\an1}THE WHOLE PROBLEM.
{\an1} THAT'S RIGHT, JIM.
{\an1}I HAVE, JIM.
{\an1}GET A HAIRCUT, JUST BE NICE YOU
{\an1} WELCOME BACK.
{\an1}OR KILLED IN MYSTERIOUS WAYS.
{\an1}FELL FROM A BALCONY.
{\an1}"UNLIKELY TO REMAIN BREATHING."
{\an1}TO DIE RIGHT BEFORE THAT, I
{\an1}TEA POISONED?
{\an1} YOU'VE MET VLADIMIR PUTIN?
{\an1}OR WHO WAVE HELLO TO HIM WITH
{\an1} NO, NO, I -- NO.
{\an1}DROPPING POISON INTO TEA, AND NO
{\an1}SENSE.
Aired 6 years ago - Apr 24, 2018
Jim proposes a test for curbing overpopulation, heads across the pond to challenge Ireland's draconian abortion laws and meets a teacher with controversial views on slavery.
{\an1}HERE.
{\an1}HAVE ATTEMPTED TO LIMIT OF
{\an1}RETIREMENT COSTS AND SOCIAL
{\an1} A NONGOVERNMENTAL
{\an1}YOU EVEN NEED A LICENSE TO BREED
{\an1}SO I PROPOSE A BRIEF QUIZ FOR
{\an1}BE, ARE YOU A PEDOPHILE?
{\an1}ON A HIGH SHELF?
{\an1}WHO KNOWS IF YOU'RE A SLYTHERIN
{\an1}POPULATION PROBLEM, SO -- WE CAN
{\an1} EUGENICS.
{\an1}NEED TO CATEGORIZE AND KILL
{\an1}LAWS INTO ACTION TO SEE
{\an1}I GOT THIS.
{\an1}IT'S PLACES LIKE -- IRELAND?
{\an1}SHE'S A GREAT STANDUP COMEDIAN.
{\an1} 14 YEARS.
{\an1} AND FETUS, YEAH.
{\an1}ABORTION IN IRELAND IS "GOING TO
{\an1}DIFFERENT STATES, IRISH WOMEN GO
{\an1}DRINKING BLEACH OR -- JESUS,
{\an1}RAISING AWARENESS BY TELLING HER
{\an1} DO I KNOW HIM?
{\an1}WAY BECAUSE IT WAS A HORRIBLE
{\an1}YOU'VE EVER TRIED TO ADDRESS
{\an1}IT COMEDICALLY?
{\an1}THERE'S TALK NOW OF BRINGING IN
{\an1}PERFORM ON THE ABORTION CRUISE?
{\an1}AND THE LAWS THAT FORCED
{\an1}RIGHTS ISSUE IS BEYOND MY
{\an1}I'M IN DUBLIN, HOME OF THE
{\an1}WHY DO SOMETHING IN YOUR OWN
{\an1}WANT TO TRY THEM ON?
{\an1}JUSTIN BARRETT, AN IRISH
{\an1} YOU'RE IN GOOD HANDS, SEE YOU
{\an1}I'LL EAT THIS MYSELF.
{\an1}I DON'T HAVE THE KEYS.
{\an1}OKAY, I'LL BE RIGHT BACK,
{\an1} LIKE MUSICALS?
{\an1}OKAY, LISTEN, CALM DOWN.
{\an1}ANYMORE OR SOMETHING.
{\an1} WE'RE NOT WALKING.
{\an1} NO, I DON'T HAVE A PROBLEM
{\an1} DO YOU BELIEVE WOMEN WHO GET
{\an1} DEATH PENALTY.
{\an1}GET ME OUT OF HERE.
{\an1}FUNDAMENTAL HUMAN RIGHTS.
{\an1}IRELAND WHO HAVE BEEN IGNORED.
{\an1}THE EIGHTH AMENDMENT.
Aired 6 years ago - Apr 17, 2018
Jim questions President Trump's motives for bombing Syria, breaks down former FBI Chief James Comey's gossipy memoir and sits down with "Rampage" star Malin Akerman.
{\an1}DO THEY COME OR DO THEY GO?
{\an1}SO WHEN TRUMP ORDERED THE
{\an1}THE RULE OF LAW.
{\an1}WHY CAN'T YOU JUST KILL YOUR
{\an1}TRUMP DOESN'T REALLY CARE ABOUT
{\an1}AND START BLOWING STUFF UP IF WE
{\an1}DID.
{\an1}THE BACK OF A FOOD TRUCK, AND
{\an1}AND THE UK DECIDE TO STRIKE
{\an1}DIRECTOR JAMES COMEY, AMERICA'S
{\an1}FORTUNE COOKIES.
{\an1}BUT THIS IS A COMEDY SHOW.
{\an1} THE OCEAN WAS HE WAS INVOLVED
{\an1}OF COURSE YOU DO!
{\an1}THE GOLDEN SHOWER THING WASN'T
{\an1}DWRET GET JEFF SESSIONS BACK IN
{\an1}LIKE PIECES OF MEAT, WHO LIES
{\an1}THAT'S PART OF THE JOB.
{\an1}NOW IN HER CURRENT STATE.
{\an1}TO CONGRESS, THAT THE CRIMINAL
{\an1}BABY AND GO, OH, GOD THIS THING
{\an1}DIRECTOR HAS NO CREDIBILITY.
{\an1}THROUGHOUT THE NIGHT.
{\an1}THROUGH THE BLATANT LIES OF A
{\an1}GOOD GUY OR A BAD GUY?
{\an1}IS TRYING TO DESTROY HIM FOR
{\an1}PLEASE WELCOME MALIN AKERMAN.
{\an1} IT'S SO FREEING.
{\an1} IT REALLY WAS SOMETHING THAT
{\an1}A DIFFERENT CHILD, NOT THE SAME
{\an1}SEND IT TO MY BROTHER.
{\an1}ARTISTIC IN THE WAY THAT HE DOES
{\an1} WAS IT PROPORTIONAL?
{\an1}I WAS IN THE BATH.
{\an1}BUT I GRABBED HIS HAIR AND DREW
{\an1}INTERNATIONAL."
{\an1} THE CYCLE OF POVERTY.
{\an1}THESE -- YOU HAVE TO BE FOR
{\an1}IT IS A FOOLPROOF WAY TO DO IT.
{\an1}I'VE NEVER HEARD OF A SWEDISH
{\an1}[ BLEEP ] MENTAL.
{\an1} I FEEL LIKE NOT SAYING IT,
{\an1}CARD TO BECOME A CITIZEN.
{\an1} I HEARD THAT.
{\an1}AUDIENCE.
{\an1}WHEN IN DOUBT, "THE PRESIDENT."
{\an1} YEAH, GET OUT OF YOUR
{\an1}CANADA?
Aired 6 years ago - Apr 10, 2018
Jim breaks down the Oklahoma teachers' strike, tries desperately to get Noel Gallagher to like him and examines EPA chief Scott Pruitt's religious worldview.
{\an1}I'M -- I'M SORRY FOR YOUR LOSS.
{\an1}BUT -- NO, CAN'T SAY THAT.
{\an1}I DO AGREE WITH THAT.
{\an1}THE TEACHER WHOSE LIFE IS IN
{\an1}THE CORRECT ANSWER IS, VODKA.
{\an1}AND SOME SCHOOLS ARE SIMPLY
{\an1}ABOUT 9/11?
{\an1}VARIOUS AREAS.
{\an1}AREN'T YOURS ARE [ BLEEP ]
{\an1}I'M A REPUBLICAN.
{\an1}RIGHT FOR YOUR STUDENTS AND THE
{\an1}GETTING DUMBER AND DUMBER.
{\an1}SAY W -- P -- OKLAHOMA ♪
{\an1}TO DO THIS.
{\an1}THEY WERE LIKE THE BEATLES BUT
{\an1}I LIKE TO PARTY.
{\an1} WHY ARE YOU ON MY SHOW?
{\an1} YOU TALK ABOUT YOUR
{\an1} YOU DON'T GET MICHAEL JACKSON
{\an1}I SOMETIMES MISS THAT.
{\an1}PEOPLE LIKE US, WE HAVE TO DO
{\an1}CAN YOU JUST COME, MY FRIEND'S A
{\an1}SO WE ALL PILE IN THESE
{\an1}GREAT HOUSE.
{\an1}TWO SONS AND YOUR DAUGHTER, HEY,
{\an1}ME.
{\an1} I LOVE HIM FOR THE COMEDY
{\an1}LANDED UPON THE HUMAN RACE.
{\an1}TAKEN OF HIM IN A DAY THAN I HAD
{\an1}BUT I'D KICK MYSELF IF I DIDN'T
{\an1}[ BLEEP ].
{\an1} NO.
{\an1} WELCOME BACK.
{\an1}FRONT OF CRUMBLING SCHOOLS.
{\an1}AS EPA CHIEF HE'S SPENT MILLIONS
{\an1} CNN HAS EARNED EPA IS IN THE
{\an1}THE PRESIDENT HAS LOADS OF
{\an1}HIM SPENDING MONEY ON APARTMENTS
{\an1}PESTICIDE BANS, SCRUBBED ANY
{\an1}DIRECTOR TO BE EVIL AND A
{\an1}THE ENVIRONMENT TO SOMEONE WHO
{\an1}OH, THANKS FOR LETTING ME KNOW,
{\an1}OH, I'M SORRY FOR YOUR LOSS.
{\an1}BAPTIST FAITH AS HIS GUIDING
{\an1}POPULAR RELIGIOUS AFFAIRS
{\an1}GREAT.
{\an1}HE COZIES UP TO LOBBYISTS TO GET
{\an1}PENTHOUSE NEAR THE CAPITOL, JUST
{\an1}AND THAT PLAN INVOLVES GETTING
{\an1}AND MORE FUN MEANS GOOD TIMES.
Aired 6 years ago - Apr 03, 2018
Jim makes the case for decriminalizing sex work, discusses press freedom with White House reporters and looks at the Trump administration's efforts to modify the census.
{\an1}WAS JUST A LIST OF WOMEN THAT A
GUY NAMED CRAIG PLANNED TO
{\an1}I HATE ALL KINDS OF TRAFFIC.
{\an1}BUT IT DOES AFFECT YOU.
{\an1}WITHOUT YOUR CONSENT.
{\an1}CAMERA, THE CAMERA BUTTON'S IN
THE TOP CORNER, YES, YOU DO HAVE
{\an1}NOW I'M LOOKING AT THE DOG, THIS
IS THE WORST WANK I'VE EVER HAD.
{\an1}THE RESEARCH SHOWS THAT A
HEALTH-BASED AND RIGHT-SPACED
{\an1}SO WHAT SHOULD WE DO?
{\an1}THIS IS A SUBJECT I'M PASSIONATE
ABOUT.
{\an1}KEEP SEX WORKERS SAFE AND DON'T
FORCE THEM UNDERGROUND.
{\an1} WELCOME BACK.
{\an1}STATES HAS REPEATEDLY SINGLED
OUT ONE GROUP AS THE ENEMY OF
{\an1}DRUGMAKERS AND THE OPIOID
CRISIS?
{\an1}NAH.
{\an1} SINCE THEIR JOB IS FACT
CHECKING THE TRUMP
{\an1}WHEN YOU'RE REALLY IN IT, IN IT,
YOU TRAVEL SO MUCH TOGETHER WITH
{\an1} I HAVE NOT HAD SEX WITH
ANYBODY AT THIS STABLE.
{\an1}GONE.
THERE IS A CONSTANT
{\an1}YOU KIND OF KNOW WHAT THE MOST
POWERFUL PERSON IN THE COUNTRY
{\an1}AND THE THING HE LIKES TO SKROOE
SCREAM THE MOST --
{\an1}IN THE ELECTION.
{\an1} BUT THE PEOPLE DOING THAT
GIVING YOU A BAD NAME, WHAT
{\an1}JUST LIKE A CHEAP CONDO
DEVELOPMENT, TRUMP'S FAKE NEWS
{\an1} AT LEAST 200 CIVILIANS HAVE
BEEN KILLED IN GOVERNMENT
{\an1}THEY'RE LIKE ELBOWING THE
CHINESE PRESS WITH YOU.
{\an1}ABOUT INSTITUTIONS.
{\an1}SO THE CONVERSATION WILL
CONTINUE.
{\an1}HOLDING THE PEOPLE YOU ELECTED
ACCOUNTABLE.
{\an1}WE'LL BE RIGHT BACK.
{\an1}A HOT AND JUICY STORY ABOUT THE
U.S. SEN.
{\an1}ADMINISTRATION!
{\an1}♪
AT THIS POINT, THE WHITE
{\an1}WHEN IT WAS REMOVED.
{\an1}LIKE WHAT HAPPENED TO YOU,
SARAH?
{\an1}NO, NO, WELL, FIRST OF ALL I
ALWAYS PARK HERE.
{\an1}SCHOOLS!
{\an1}USUALLY IT TAKES YEARS OF
RESEARCH BEFORE THE GOVERNMENT
{\an1}OBAMA WAS ALREADY IN HIS SECOND
TERM BY THEN.
{\an1}THE SECOND THING I WOULD HAVE
DONE IS [ BLEEP ] A WHITE WOMAN
{\an1}AND CHANGE THE WORD "CAUCASIAN"
TO "TINY-DICKED CRACKER."
{\an1}UNFORTUNATELY I'LL NEVER GET THE
CHANCE.
{\an1}BEING UNDOCUMENTED IS THEIR
WHOLE THING.
{\an1}MORE RECENTLY THE DEPARTMENT OF
HOMELAND SECURITY USED CENSUS
{\an1}EVEN BACK IN OLDEN TIMES PEOPLE
WERE SKEPTICAL OF CENSUS
{\an1} MAN, THOSE KIDS ARE WHITE AND
THEY'RE STILL TERRIFIED OF THE
{\an1}PROPERLY REPRESENT WHICH HAD
MEANS THE COUNTRY WILL LOOK
{\an1}NOW HAVE.
{\an1}SECOND ZERO INTO A ONE WITH A
PEN.
Aired 6 years ago - Mar 27, 2018
Jim looks at GOP attempts to ignore the gun debate, attends a March For Our Lives rally and explains why teens are so successful at advocating for gun control.