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SEASON
EPISODE

Season 3

Aired 7 years ago - May 24, 2010

While Penny worries that dating Leonard has ruined her for normal guys, Wolowitz and Koothrappali search for Sheldon's perfect match online.

Aired 7 years ago - May 17, 2010

Leonard tells Penny about how he met Sheldon for the first time...and what happened to the elevator.

Aired 7 years ago - May 10, 2010

Leonard and Sheldon compete for the attention of a famous female physicist.

Aired 7 years ago - May 03, 2010

When Leonard and Penny aren't speaking, Sheldon goes to extremes to keep them both happy.

Aired 7 years ago - Apr 12, 2010

A fight between Leonard and Penny threatens their relationship, while Sheldon battles Wil Wheaton in bowling.

Recap of The Big Bang Theory Season 3 Episode 19 (S03E19) - 1
Interesting.
Recap of The Big Bang Theory Season 3 Episode 19 (S03E19) - 2
Big or small, I don't like rabbits.
Recap of The Big Bang Theory Season 3 Episode 19 (S03E19) - 3
Maybe that's what they want to talk about.
Recap of The Big Bang Theory Season 3 Episode 19 (S03E19) - 4
What do you want from me?
Recap of The Big Bang Theory Season 3 Episode 19 (S03E19) - 5
Why is Leonard being a giant douche?
Recap of The Big Bang Theory Season 3 Episode 19 (S03E19) - 6
I don't want to talk about it.
Recap of The Big Bang Theory Season 3 Episode 19 (S03E19) - 7
Did you think it would be funny to put on a pair of her panties
Recap of The Big Bang Theory Season 3 Episode 19 (S03E19) - 8
In fact, I've prepared some trash talk for the occasion.
Recap of The Big Bang Theory Season 3 Episode 19 (S03E19) - 9
Did you ask her to start waxing?
Recap of The Big Bang Theory Season 3 Episode 19 (S03E19) - 10
Recap of The Big Bang Theory Season 3 Episode 19 (S03E19) - 11
Oh, that would be a good way to go.
Recap of The Big Bang Theory Season 3 Episode 19 (S03E19) - 12
In this particular case,
Recap of The Big Bang Theory Season 3 Episode 19 (S03E19) - 13
Pacific Daylight time! Bite me!
Recap of The Big Bang Theory Season 3 Episode 19 (S03E19) - 14
These are my own bowling shoes.
Recap of The Big Bang Theory Season 3 Episode 19 (S03E19) - 15
I believe some of you know
Recap of The Big Bang Theory Season 3 Episode 19 (S03E19) - 16
the Internet Explorer to my Firefox.
Recap of The Big Bang Theory Season 3 Episode 19 (S03E19) - 17
Oh, I'm ready.
Recap of The Big Bang Theory Season 3 Episode 19 (S03E19) - 18
Recap of The Big Bang Theory Season 3 Episode 19 (S03E19) - 19
The Miss Congeniality of the bowling pageant.
Recap of The Big Bang Theory Season 3 Episode 19 (S03E19) - 20
Recap of The Big Bang Theory Season 3 Episode 19 (S03E19) - 21
I'm sure you're probably sick of Star Trek questions,
Recap of The Big Bang Theory Season 3 Episode 19 (S03E19) - 22
Recap of The Big Bang Theory Season 3 Episode 19 (S03E19) - 23
you're comfortable saying you love something.
Recap of The Big Bang Theory Season 3 Episode 19 (S03E19) - 24
Okay, well, now you've had some time to think about it.
Recap of The Big Bang Theory Season 3 Episode 19 (S03E19) - 25
You don't get to decide when I'm ready to say "I love you!"
Recap of The Big Bang Theory Season 3 Episode 19 (S03E19) - 26
Recap of The Big Bang Theory Season 3 Episode 19 (S03E19) - 27
I've been familiarizing myself with female emotional crises
Recap of The Big Bang Theory Season 3 Episode 19 (S03E19) - 28
Ack!
Recap of The Big Bang Theory Season 3 Episode 19 (S03E19) - 29
Yeah, I'm sorry about that.
Recap of The Big Bang Theory Season 3 Episode 19 (S03E19) - 30
No. Clearly another woman in dire need of ice cream.
Recap of The Big Bang Theory Season 3 Episode 19 (S03E19) - 31
No, no, that's okay.
Recap of The Big Bang Theory Season 3 Episode 19 (S03E19) - 32
Oh, I think we both know the answer to that question.
Recap of The Big Bang Theory Season 3 Episode 19 (S03E19) - 33
'cause I said somethingice to a bowl of chili fries?
Recap of The Big Bang Theory Season 3 Episode 19 (S03E19) - 34
I've been in this relationship two years longer than you.
Recap of The Big Bang Theory Season 3 Episode 19 (S03E19) - 35
Yeah, I do.
Recap of The Big Bang Theory Season 3 Episode 19 (S03E19) - 36
Recap of The Big Bang Theory Season 3 Episode 19 (S03E19) - 37
Wil Wheaton's character on Star Trek.
Recap of The Big Bang Theory Season 3 Episode 19 (S03E19) - 38
No! Again, it's not the Wesley Crushers.
Recap of The Big Bang Theory Season 3 Episode 19 (S03E19) - 39
It's The Wesley Crushers.
Recap of The Big Bang Theory Season 3 Episode 19 (S03E19) - 40
in a fashion to be chosen by the victor.
Recap of The Big Bang Theory Season 3 Episode 19 (S03E19) - 41
that I'm really looking forward to wiping the floor with you.
Recap of The Big Bang Theory Season 3 Episode 19 (S03E19) - 42
No, after you... as we are
Recap of The Big Bang Theory Season 3 Episode 19 (S03E19) - 43
Recap of The Big Bang Theory Season 3 Episode 19 (S03E19) - 44
That's not even from your franchise!
Recap of The Big Bang Theory Season 3 Episode 19 (S03E19) - 45
Tony and Maria from West Side Story,
Recap of The Big Bang Theory Season 3 Episode 19 (S03E19) - 46
Recap of The Big Bang Theory Season 3 Episode 19 (S03E19) - 47
It's good that we got out and did something physical.
Recap of The Big Bang Theory Season 3 Episode 19 (S03E19) - 48
Recap of The Big Bang Theory Season 3 Episode 19 (S03E19) - 49
The ball! The ball! The ball! The ball!
Recap of The Big Bang Theory Season 3 Episode 19 (S03E19) - 50
with your boyfriend.
Recap of The Big Bang Theory Season 3 Episode 19 (S03E19) - 51
And she strung me along for almost two years.
Aired 7 years ago - Mar 22, 2010

Sheldon's friends come to his aid when his fear of public speaking stands between him and a coveted award.

Recap of The Big Bang Theory Season 3 Episode 18 (S03E18) - 1
They expect me to give a speech at the banquet.
Recap of The Big Bang Theory Season 3 Episode 18 (S03E18) - 2
you did 20 minutes on why guacamole turns brown.
Recap of The Big Bang Theory Season 3 Episode 18 (S03E18) - 3
General rule of thumb is 36 adults or 70 children.
Recap of The Big Bang Theory Season 3 Episode 18 (S03E18) - 4
That's no reason to back out.
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Thank you.
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I was 14 and graduating summa cum laude from college.
Recap of The Big Bang Theory Season 3 Episode 18 (S03E18) - 7
There must have been thousands of people.
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Yes, I'll buy it on the iTunes, Mother.
Recap of The Big Bang Theory Season 3 Episode 18 (S03E18) - 10
LEONARD: We think we can help you with your stage fright.
Recap of The Big Bang Theory Season 3 Episode 18 (S03E18) - 11
you're trying to do this all by yourself.
Recap of The Big Bang Theory Season 3 Episode 18 (S03E18) - 12
Oh. I say a lot of things, sweetie.
Recap of The Big Bang Theory Season 3 Episode 18 (S03E18) - 13
into Xavier's School for Gifted Youngsters, but go on.
Recap of The Big Bang Theory Season 3 Episode 18 (S03E18) - 14
of breast-feeding codependently.
Recap of The Big Bang Theory Season 3 Episode 18 (S03E18) - 15
the most impressive contribution for last.
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And that's 24-seven, buddy.
Recap of The Big Bang Theory Season 3 Episode 18 (S03E18) - 17
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These methods come from the ancient gurus of India
Recap of The Big Bang Theory Season 3 Episode 18 (S03E18) - 19
Now... (clears throat) close your eyes.
Recap of The Big Bang Theory Season 3 Episode 18 (S03E18) - 20
Do you want to do this or not?
Recap of The Big Bang Theory Season 3 Episode 18 (S03E18) - 21
Sheldonopolis.
Recap of The Big Bang Theory Season 3 Episode 18 (S03E18) - 22
It's a bit nippy.
Recap of The Big Bang Theory Season 3 Episode 18 (S03E18) - 23
Just take a freaking sweater!
Recap of The Big Bang Theory Season 3 Episode 18 (S03E18) - 24
It's a cardigan. I have to button it.
Recap of The Big Bang Theory Season 3 Episode 18 (S03E18) - 25
If the children can't run, leave them behind.
Recap of The Big Bang Theory Season 3 Episode 18 (S03E18) - 26
Just as I suspected.
Recap of The Big Bang Theory Season 3 Episode 18 (S03E18) - 27
It'll give you confidence.
Recap of The Big Bang Theory Season 3 Episode 18 (S03E18) - 28
Now, let's see what we've got.
Recap of The Big Bang Theory Season 3 Episode 18 (S03E18) - 29
SHELDON: This is pretty sharp.
Recap of The Big Bang Theory Season 3 Episode 18 (S03E18) - 30
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Please just try this one on.
Recap of The Big Bang Theory Season 3 Episode 18 (S03E18) - 32
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Instead, I get the same question I hear
Recap of The Big Bang Theory Season 3 Episode 18 (S03E18) - 34
But everything around me was to scale,
Recap of The Big Bang Theory Season 3 Episode 18 (S03E18) - 35
Why don't we just talk?
Recap of The Big Bang Theory Season 3 Episode 18 (S03E18) - 36
with a hypodermic needle.
Recap of The Big Bang Theory Season 3 Episode 18 (S03E18) - 37
Really, Leonard?
Recap of The Big Bang Theory Season 3 Episode 18 (S03E18) - 38
I won a ribbon at the science fair
Recap of The Big Bang Theory Season 3 Episode 18 (S03E18) - 39
And how did that make you feel?
Recap of The Big Bang Theory Season 3 Episode 18 (S03E18) - 40
I had never seen my brother's project.
Recap of The Big Bang Theory Season 3 Episode 18 (S03E18) - 41
Recap of The Big Bang Theory Season 3 Episode 18 (S03E18) - 42
can find his way to crawl out of bed each morning,
Recap of The Big Bang Theory Season 3 Episode 18 (S03E18) - 43
of this year's Chancellor's award for Science
Recap of The Big Bang Theory Season 3 Episode 18 (S03E18) - 44
I wonder what that feels like.
Recap of The Big Bang Theory Season 3 Episode 18 (S03E18) - 45
But I digress.
Recap of The Big Bang Theory Season 3 Episode 18 (S03E18) - 46
Fine, faint.
Recap of The Big Bang Theory Season 3 Episode 18 (S03E18) - 47
the projects were totally different.
Recap of The Big Bang Theory Season 3 Episode 18 (S03E18) - 48
right.
Recap of The Big Bang Theory Season 3 Episode 18 (S03E18) - 49
and at least one year of algebraic topology?
Recap of The Big Bang Theory Season 3 Episode 18 (S03E18) - 50
Aired 7 years ago - Mar 08, 2010

When the guys find a ring from "The Lord of the Rings" at a garage sale, it threatens to tear them apart.

Aired 7 years ago - Mar 01, 2010

Sheldon winds up in traffic court when he gets a ticket because of Penny.

Aired 7 years ago - Feb 08, 2010

Leonard can only bring one guest on a trip to see CERN's Large Hadron Collider (the world's largest and highest energy particle accelerator) in Switzerland on Valentine's Day.

Aired 7 years ago - Feb 01, 2010

Sheldon's search for the answer to a physics problem leads him to work at the Cheesecake Factory with Penny.

Aired 7 years ago - Jan 18, 2010

When their apartment is robbed, Leonard and Sheldon turn to their friends to create a state-of-the-art security system.

Aired 7 years ago - Jan 11, 2010

Leonard is aghast to find out a secret of Penny's: she believes in psychics. Meanwhile, Sheldon tries to assist Koothrappali in picking up a girl at a university mixer.

Recap of The Big Bang Theory Season 3 Episode 12 (S03E12) - 1
Okay, well, how about this?
Recap of The Big Bang Theory Season 3 Episode 12 (S03E12) - 2
this is the place to be."
Recap of The Big Bang Theory Season 3 Episode 12 (S03E12) - 3
If outside is so good, why has mankind spent thousands of years
Recap of The Big Bang Theory Season 3 Episode 12 (S03E12) - 4
Sometimes when I feel stifled and want a change of scenery,
Recap of The Big Bang Theory Season 3 Episode 12 (S03E12) - 5
I don't want to go to Flatland.
Recap of The Big Bang Theory Season 3 Episode 12 (S03E12) - 6
Is that you, Raj?
Recap of The Big Bang Theory Season 3 Episode 12 (S03E12) - 7
Oh, look, there's a sexually attractive line segment.
Recap of The Big Bang Theory Season 3 Episode 12 (S03E12) - 8
Oh, yeah, I'm starved.
Recap of The Big Bang Theory Season 3 Episode 12 (S03E12) - 9
on the off-chance you'd get to second base?
Recap of The Big Bang Theory Season 3 Episode 12 (S03E12) - 10
of Diary of Anne Frank above a bowling alley.
Recap of The Big Bang Theory Season 3 Episode 12 (S03E12) - 11
Well, I went to this psychic who told me that if I cut my hair,
Recap of The Big Bang Theory Season 3 Episode 12 (S03E12) - 12
She wrote a book and has her own Web site.
Recap of The Big Bang Theory Season 3 Episode 12 (S03E12) - 13
Why don't you kids go ahead and chat?
Recap of The Big Bang Theory Season 3 Episode 12 (S03E12) - 14
your limited edition Green Lantern lantern.
Recap of The Big Bang Theory Season 3 Episode 12 (S03E12) - 15
And when my wingman is carrying a Green Lantern lantern,
Recap of The Big Bang Theory Season 3 Episode 12 (S03E12) - 16
Well, apparently, these people and I differ greatly
Recap of The Big Bang Theory Season 3 Episode 12 (S03E12) - 17
There's a female.
Recap of The Big Bang Theory Season 3 Episode 12 (S03E12) - 18
but ideally, yes.
Recap of The Big Bang Theory Season 3 Episode 12 (S03E12) - 19
When I lie through my teeth to a woman,
Recap of The Big Bang Theory Season 3 Episode 12 (S03E12) - 20
I'm Abby.
Recap of The Big Bang Theory Season 3 Episode 12 (S03E12) - 21
Recap of The Big Bang Theory Season 3 Episode 12 (S03E12) - 22
Is that the limited edition
Recap of The Big Bang Theory Season 3 Episode 12 (S03E12) - 23
Have you chosen one to copulate with?
Recap of The Big Bang Theory Season 3 Episode 12 (S03E12) - 24
So, what should we talk about?
Recap of The Big Bang Theory Season 3 Episode 12 (S03E12) - 25
I'm sorry, but facts are facts.
Recap of The Big Bang Theory Season 3 Episode 12 (S03E12) - 26
Amazing.
Recap of The Big Bang Theory Season 3 Episode 12 (S03E12) - 27
Maybe we should just stop talking about this.
Recap of The Big Bang Theory Season 3 Episode 12 (S03E12) - 28
monogamous, mutually supportive relationship
Recap of The Big Bang Theory Season 3 Episode 12 (S03E12) - 29
I knew you were going to do that.
Recap of The Big Bang Theory Season 3 Episode 12 (S03E12) - 30
What's going on?
Recap of The Big Bang Theory Season 3 Episode 12 (S03E12) - 31
Laser. Had a great night last night.
Recap of The Big Bang Theory Season 3 Episode 12 (S03E12) - 32
Well, my shirt.
Recap of The Big Bang Theory Season 3 Episode 12 (S03E12) - 33
It's not just Cylons.
Recap of The Big Bang Theory Season 3 Episode 12 (S03E12) - 34
Hey, I once dated a girl
Recap of The Big Bang Theory Season 3 Episode 12 (S03E12) - 35
Hey, I'm sure Penny fakes all kinds of things
Recap of The Big Bang Theory Season 3 Episode 12 (S03E12) - 36
you want to sleep with.
Recap of The Big Bang Theory Season 3 Episode 12 (S03E12) - 37
who lives in a government research facility in China.
Recap of The Big Bang Theory Season 3 Episode 12 (S03E12) - 38
I respect that.
Recap of The Big Bang Theory Season 3 Episode 12 (S03E12) - 39
koira.
Recap of The Big Bang Theory Season 3 Episode 12 (S03E12) - 40
One minute.
Recap of The Big Bang Theory Season 3 Episode 12 (S03E12) - 41
and now I thought I'd learn Finnish.
Recap of The Big Bang Theory Season 3 Episode 12 (S03E12) - 42
I merely offer you a facial expression
Recap of The Big Bang Theory Season 3 Episode 12 (S03E12) - 43
Please, Sheldon, I'm a lost Indian boy
Recap of The Big Bang Theory Season 3 Episode 12 (S03E12) - 44
supplication, or... vetoomus
Recap of The Big Bang Theory Season 3 Episode 12 (S03E12) - 45
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Recap of The Big Bang Theory Season 3 Episode 12 (S03E12) - 48
Hulk sad.
Recap of The Big Bang Theory Season 3 Episode 12 (S03E12) - 49
Every year, 15,000 fires are caused
Recap of The Big Bang Theory Season 3 Episode 12 (S03E12) - 50
after you were the most obnoxious person
Aired 7 years ago - Dec 14, 2009

A Christmas visit from his mother has Leonard discovering she's kept a lot of news from him that she shares with Sheldon and worrying if she'll approve of his romance with Penny.

Recap of The Big Bang Theory Season 3 Episode 11 (S03E11) - 1
sounds like more fun than 12 hours of church with my mother
Recap of The Big Bang Theory Season 3 Episode 11 (S03E11) - 2
No. Isaac goes at the top of the tree.
Recap of The Big Bang Theory Season 3 Episode 11 (S03E11) - 3
What?
Recap of The Big Bang Theory Season 3 Episode 11 (S03E11) - 4
that his mother won't approve of you as his mate.
Recap of The Big Bang Theory Season 3 Episode 11 (S03E11) - 5
that it's doubtful that his mother will be overly impressed
Recap of The Big Bang Theory Season 3 Episode 11 (S03E11) - 6
And those specials-- they change every day.
Recap of The Big Bang Theory Season 3 Episode 11 (S03E11) - 7
Why not?
Recap of The Big Bang Theory Season 3 Episode 11 (S03E11) - 8
I drove, Mother.
Recap of The Big Bang Theory Season 3 Episode 11 (S03E11) - 9
of how electric dipoles in the brain's water molecules
Recap of The Big Bang Theory Season 3 Episode 11 (S03E11) - 10
I don't really like flowers.
Recap of The Big Bang Theory Season 3 Episode 11 (S03E11) - 11
why he knows more about your life than I do.
Recap of The Big Bang Theory Season 3 Episode 11 (S03E11) - 12
We discussed it at length during our last video chat.
Recap of The Big Bang Theory Season 3 Episode 11 (S03E11) - 13
Now I'm less fine.
Recap of The Big Bang Theory Season 3 Episode 11 (S03E11) - 14
and a two-time Olympic bronze medalist.
Recap of The Big Bang Theory Season 3 Episode 11 (S03E11) - 15
to Isaac Newton v. Gottfried Leibniz?
Recap of The Big Bang Theory Season 3 Episode 11 (S03E11) - 16
that accompanied your learning to masturbate.
Recap of The Big Bang Theory Season 3 Episode 11 (S03E11) - 17
toward one another?
Recap of The Big Bang Theory Season 3 Episode 11 (S03E11) - 18
No, really.
Recap of The Big Bang Theory Season 3 Episode 11 (S03E11) - 19
Leonard, tell her I have a girlfriend.
Recap of The Big Bang Theory Season 3 Episode 11 (S03E11) - 20
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I'll get you a plate.
Recap of The Big Bang Theory Season 3 Episode 11 (S03E11) - 22
so I'm going to say no.
Recap of The Big Bang Theory Season 3 Episode 11 (S03E11) - 23
Yes. He was cheating on me.
Recap of The Big Bang Theory Season 3 Episode 11 (S03E11) - 24
Mmm, well, let's see.
Recap of The Big Bang Theory Season 3 Episode 11 (S03E11) - 25
Why am I the last to know?!
Recap of The Big Bang Theory Season 3 Episode 11 (S03E11) - 26
So, Penny, what's new in your life?
Recap of The Big Bang Theory Season 3 Episode 11 (S03E11) - 27
but he seemed a bit emotionally unstable
Recap of The Big Bang Theory Season 3 Episode 11 (S03E11) - 28
So, uh, you must be devastated about your divorce.
Recap of The Big Bang Theory Season 3 Episode 11 (S03E11) - 29
Well, initially I felt something akin to grief and perhaps anger,
Recap of The Big Bang Theory Season 3 Episode 11 (S03E11) - 30
Oh, that's nothing.
Recap of The Big Bang Theory Season 3 Episode 11 (S03E11) - 31
That's exactly what I say during orgasms: "Yikes."
Recap of The Big Bang Theory Season 3 Episode 11 (S03E11) - 32
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That's a lousy conversation starter.
Recap of The Big Bang Theory Season 3 Episode 11 (S03E11) - 34
I want that too.
Recap of The Big Bang Theory Season 3 Episode 11 (S03E11) - 35
Leonard, what you're experiencing
Recap of The Big Bang Theory Season 3 Episode 11 (S03E11) - 36
It's not?
Recap of The Big Bang Theory Season 3 Episode 11 (S03E11) - 37
to a hypothetical, idealized world.
Recap of The Big Bang Theory Season 3 Episode 11 (S03E11) - 38
has failed you, you always have me, your surrogate family.
Recap of The Big Bang Theory Season 3 Episode 11 (S03E11) - 39
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I've been responsible for my own buzz since 2003.
Recap of The Big Bang Theory Season 3 Episode 11 (S03E11) - 41
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I'm seriously considering asking that busboy
Recap of The Big Bang Theory Season 3 Episode 11 (S03E11) - 43
If a little is good, more must be better.
Recap of The Big Bang Theory Season 3 Episode 11 (S03E11) - 44
The one from whom I live across the hall... from.
Recap of The Big Bang Theory Season 3 Episode 11 (S03E11) - 45
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embarrassed about the relationship
Recap of The Big Bang Theory Season 3 Episode 11 (S03E11) - 47
into that busboy's back pocket,
Recap of The Big Bang Theory Season 3 Episode 11 (S03E11) - 48
What the hell is going on?
Recap of The Big Bang Theory Season 3 Episode 11 (S03E11) - 49
Yeah, not bad, not bad.
Recap of The Big Bang Theory Season 3 Episode 11 (S03E11) - 50
Oh, thank you. You're welcome.
Aired 7 years ago - Dec 07, 2009

Penny gets help from Sheldon in order to understand what Leonard's work is, while Wolowitz develops a jealousy when Leonard starts hanging out with his new girlfriend.

Aired 7 years ago - Nov 23, 2009

After he's humiliated on National Public Radio, Sheldon vows to destroy Kripke, while Wolowitz tries not to destroy his new relationship with Bernadette.

Aired 7 years ago - Nov 16, 2009

With Leonard, Howard and Raj away camping in the desert, an injured Penny has only Sheldon to rely on.

Aired 7 years ago - Nov 09, 2009

A squabble between Leonard and Penny sees Sheldon playing mediator, though out of his own incovenience from the sitiation rather than altruism.

Aired 7 years ago - Nov 02, 2009

Sheldon becomes Leonard's teacher in order to understand football, while an incident with flying a kite threatens Howard and Raj's friendship.

Aired 8 years ago - Oct 19, 2009

After overhearing that Wil Wheaton is entering a trading-card competition, Sheldon decides to enter it himself. Meanwhile, Penny sets up one of her friends on a date with Wolowitz.

Aired 8 years ago - Oct 12, 2009

Raj must find a new job or be sent back to India, but Sheldon has a solution, which leaves Leonard and Penny dealing with Howard as a third wheel.

Aired 8 years ago - Oct 05, 2009

Howard and Raj visit a Goth nightclub to pick up women while Sheldon attempts to build a better Penny using chocolate-based behavior modification.

Recap of The Big Bang Theory Season 3 Episode 3 (S03E03) - 1
Recap of The Big Bang Theory Season 3 Episode 3 (S03E03) - 2
Okay, Kim the night manager went on maternity leave,
Recap of The Big Bang Theory Season 3 Episode 3 (S03E03) - 3
Easily calculable. We begin by identifying a set of married couples with unisex names.
Recap of The Big Bang Theory Season 3 Episode 3 (S03E03) - 4
Ooh, Penny, it's just if The Cheese Cake Factory is run by witches.
Recap of The Big Bang Theory Season 3 Episode 3 (S03E03) - 5
Are you finished?
Recap of The Big Bang Theory Season 3 Episode 3 (S03E03) - 6
You said be nice to Penny.
Recap of The Big Bang Theory Season 3 Episode 3 (S03E03) - 7
Now that's you, obnoxious and insufferable.
Recap of The Big Bang Theory Season 3 Episode 3 (S03E03) - 8
No. Raj and I are going to a Goth club in Hollywood to hang with the night people.
Recap of The Big Bang Theory Season 3 Episode 3 (S03E03) - 9
Howard, what did you do?
Recap of The Big Bang Theory Season 3 Episode 3 (S03E03) - 10
take them off, and I can still be buried in a Jewish cemetery.
Recap of The Big Bang Theory Season 3 Episode 3 (S03E03) - 11
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I'm kind of on a John Grisham kick right now.
Recap of The Big Bang Theory Season 3 Episode 3 (S03E03) - 17
Just remember we are lost boys, children of the night.
Recap of The Big Bang Theory Season 3 Episode 3 (S03E03) - 18
Recap of The Big Bang Theory Season 3 Episode 3 (S03E03) - 19
Light beers. Well, Wiki-how about that.
Recap of The Big Bang Theory Season 3 Episode 3 (S03E03) - 20
Do either of you ladies enjoy the novels of John Grisham?
Recap of The Big Bang Theory Season 3 Episode 3 (S03E03) - 21
Demon samurai.
Recap of The Big Bang Theory Season 3 Episode 3 (S03E03) - 22
Then she had this bad nose job and basically wound up with three.
Recap of The Big Bang Theory Season 3 Episode 3 (S03E03) - 23
Thank you. Chocolate?
Recap of The Big Bang Theory Season 3 Episode 3 (S03E03) - 24
Recap of The Big Bang Theory Season 3 Episode 3 (S03E03) - 25
Yes, you're using chocolates as positive reinforcement for what you consider correct behaviour.
Recap of The Big Bang Theory Season 3 Episode 3 (S03E03) - 26
Sheldon, you can't train my girlfriend like a lab rat.
Recap of The Big Bang Theory Season 3 Episode 3 (S03E03) - 27
so I decided to employ operant conditioning techniques,
Recap of The Big Bang Theory Season 3 Episode 3 (S03E03) - 28
I thought the "bazinga" was implied.
Recap of The Big Bang Theory Season 3 Episode 3 (S03E03) - 29
scientifically valid protocol that will make our lives better?
Recap of The Big Bang Theory Season 3 Episode 3 (S03E03) - 30
So, what do you guys do?
Recap of The Big Bang Theory Season 3 Episode 3 (S03E03) - 31
- Oh, we're scientists. - Yeah, you know, the Dark Sciences.
Recap of The Big Bang Theory Season 3 Episode 3 (S03E03) - 32
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Not particularly.
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that requires a great deal of analysis and planning.
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If you let me use negative reinforcement, I can get it done before we go to bed.
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that you're not intrigued about the possibility of building a better girlfriend.
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Yes.
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Thank you.
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Yeah!
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this mean little skull, or Kermit the frog.
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With my luck, hepatitis.
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This.
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I'm sorry. I’m a fraud. He’s a fraud.
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And I wouldn't blame you if you walked out of here and never wanted to see us again.
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What are you thinking? Maybe a big musical number?
Aired 8 years ago - Sep 28, 2009

Leonard and Penny struggle to recover from an awkward first hookup while Sheldon and Howard stake their best comic books on a bet to determine the species of a cricket.

Recap of The Big Bang Theory Season 3 Episode 2 (S03E02) - 1
on "just fine." (snickering)
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If that’s Morse code, that’s terrible.
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Maybe an airplane headed for a mountainside.
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Let’s see if he can figure it out.
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Yeah, it’s a perfectly good word.
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Okay?
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No.
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Actually, ethyl alcohol inhibits electrical conduction
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No, you’re misunderstanding
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(cricket crping)
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a fixed relationship between the number
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Okay, you were right about wolverine and bone claws,
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childhood years capturing them with nets,
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(cricket chirping)
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I’ve always found that an inappropriate slur.
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I believe a chicken made you his bitch.
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the classicFlash of two worlds issue.
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(chirping continues)
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More wine? Hit me.
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My stomach.
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(chirping)
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Don’t push me, Sheldon.
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or the classic "Why are you hitting yourself?"
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Peppermint schnapps.
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Schnapps.
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Stairwell.
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(vomiting)
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His name isn’t Toby
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The common field cricket,
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That is not Toby,
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Shiksa. Shik-sa.
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what kind of cricket Toby is.
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Holy crap.
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Yeah, well, I don’t like bugs, okay?
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You’re welcome
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Who wants to know?
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Let me ask you one first.
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(sarcastic laugh)
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Of course I can.
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Young man, I’ve been studying insects
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That’s a Crawley’s dung beetle
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you that that’s a common field cricket,
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Congratulations.
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in an ill-considered cricket wager.
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I don’t know, empathy?
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ever since the sweaty night of ’06.
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but you’re wrong about the cricket.
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The science chirps for itself.
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(chuckling): Humorous word play.
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I spent many
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putting them in glass jars, sticking pins through them,
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underneath, identifying the genus and species.
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Oh, dude, you are never getting a shiksa goddess.
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Thatis a snowy tree cricket.
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I was done with Latin by fifth grade.
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I am willing to bet anything
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What’s the matter, you chicken?
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Chickens are not, by nature,
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my neighbor’s chicken got loose
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Fair enough.
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I will put up my Fantastic Four number 48,
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first appearance of Silver Surfer
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the classicFlash of two worlds issue.
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Hmm. Great.
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There is no way to determine the species
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(cricket chirping)
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(chirping continues)
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I wonder what the non-pathetic people are doing tonight.
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I don’t see anything.
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(cricket chirping)
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(groaning)
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My stomach.
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Ironic, isn’t it?
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Shh!
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Help me open it.
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Fine, if you don’t want to proceed,
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Are you bothered that I can so easily manipulate you?
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I may be small, but I took kung fu when I was 13,
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and I remember a good deal of it.
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and a very contentious twin sister.
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in any physical confrontation-- be it noogies, swirlies
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Ooh, big talk from a man who was once treed by a chicken.
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Peppermint schnapps.
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Why would you buy peppermint schnapps?
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and it’s fun to say schnapps.
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Hey, Leonard? What?
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Schnapps.
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SHELDON: If I were not being careful,
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Stairwell.
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I need some batteries.
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Oh, sweetie.
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and then I’m gonna rock your world.
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Are you okay?
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Ugh, Toby, what did you do in a past life
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to be so disgusting now?
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Toby is an absurd name for a cricket.
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For example, Jiminy.
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Kleingast’s Field Guide to North American Insects.
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Right here.
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AKA Gryllus assimilis,
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Hang on.
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AKA Oecanthus fultoni,
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because the Latin for that isnihil exsorbibo.
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That is not Toby,
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Oh, I really don’t care anymore
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God, I had the most horrible night.
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Obviously another carnal fiasco with the shiksi goddess.
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And if it was, it wasn’t spoken for long.
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The point is, you’re wrong again.
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Tell you what. Let’s go down
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what kind of cricket Toby is.
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I bet I could throw a rock in this room
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and come up with three better friends.
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Holy crap.
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Don’t do that!
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They’re just bugs.
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You’re afraid of insects and women.
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Ladybugs must render you catatonic.
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It was a joke.
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Just walk in.
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on the dung beetle?
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Who wants to know?
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I’m Dr. Cooper from the Physics Department.
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I haven’t even packed yet,
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for one of your godless laser machines.
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Let me ask you one first.
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and 20 years of experience to do with his life
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when the university cuts off the funding for his lab, huh?
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that make people uncomfortable?
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What’s your deal?
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Are they planning to outsource my job to Bangalore?
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Professor, can you identify our cricket?
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I can identify every insect and arachnid on the planet.
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to keep me from having to move in with my daughter in Oxnard.
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in the onion fields.
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Toby?
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Yes! No, no, wait.
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Young man, I’ve been studying insects
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in school?
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Cruel as that may be,
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Let me show you something.
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That’s a Crawley’s dung beetle
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through a Bornean rain forest,
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shacking up with a two-bit ornithologist
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and likes to wear boot-cut jeans!
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you that that’s a common field cricket,
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you can take that to the damn bank!
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Congratulations.
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Enjoy Oxnard.
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I’m sure your daughter’s looking forward to having you.
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Oh, hey, Sheldon.
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I just retrieved it from my safe deposit box.
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What do you have a safe deposit box for?
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I lost this to Wolowitz
Aired 8 years ago - Sep 21, 2009

When Sheldon learns the guys tampered with his expedition data he got from the arctic, he leaves to Texas in disgrace. This results in the guys following him, which threatens Leonard's hope for some romantic time with Penny and the guys' friendship with Sheldon.