Eastbound & Down

Kenny gets an offer from a professional team and is forced to say goodbye to his family and teaching job.

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Well, to tell you the truth, I've changed a lot since I left baseball.

#2

-So you ready to get down with this party? -I'm ready to butt-fuck this party.

#3 #4 #5

-But you already bought a car? -Bought?

#6

I made the mistake of leaving you behind before...

#7

Just let it soak in. You don't have to give me an answer right now. Just sleep on it.

#8

...please let a member of the faculty know.

#9

Now, my replacement comes very highly qualified.

#10

...because I don't wanna have to ask the same question 30 fucking times.

#11

It's all happening, Kenny.

#12

You know what I read online?

#13

...because I'm going to Tampa to suck some titties.

#14

How our journey here is basically coming to an end.

#15

...I could pay you back for what you've done for me here.

#16 #17

That's not the only trick Kenny Powers has up his sleeve this eve.

#18 #19

...but things are different now.

#20

Like I can roll the fucking dice.

#21

I get it.

#22 #23

I've been a little bit upset. I've mostly been out in the woods.

#24

You didn't say it. No. I just heard you kissed her.

#25

Kenny, I don't know how--

#26

-Right. -Getting drunk on the reg...

#27

Guess that's just the way this fucked-up world works.

#28 #29

You and me at Mons Venus, baby.

#30

No-- What? But you--

#31

What--? What did I do?

#32

Quite frankly, you're somebody I'm proud to know.

#33

I don't want you to perform this task as my assistant.

#34 #35 #36

Students and faculty of Jefferson Davis Middle School...

#37

She has instead chosen to stay here with her fiancé...

#38

There's a whole bunch of emotions and kind of questions.... Okay.

#39

...I would finally appreciate it.

#40

You can't see me, but you can feel me.

#41 #42

To be honest with you, sometimes I even forgot you even existed.

#43

In the computer room.

#44

I know that deep inside of you there's a humongous set of testicles...

#45 #46 #47

Thank you.

#48

I don't know, I think I'm fired. We'll see.

#49

Perfect. That sounds terrific.

#50