The League

The guys join Pete on what was supposed to be his 5th-anniversary spa trip. Meanwhile, Kevin enlists Taco to scare his daughter off of her new toy, which Kevin hates.

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Just because I like to eat doesn't mean I cook.

#2

PETE: Daddy, dance with Mr. McGibblets.

#3

- That's a Taco job. - That's a Taco job. You're right.

#4

- Okay. She's not home. We're good. - All right.

#5 #6

You mean the little guys in the white cars?

#7

- What did you think of the Man Mix? - Honestly...

#8

I already told Sofia that I had some lawyer bullshit this weekend.

#9

Starting with a romantic dinner for two in a private dining room...

#10

- I'm embarrassed. I apologize. - I can see how that's misleading.

#11

- Let's keep it. - Let's keep the couple massage.

#12

I'm gonna write my cell phone number on here, just so, you know, 24 hours a day.

#13

- I don't know which running back to play. - Whoa.

#14

That's why I had to bring this guy with me. My CPAP machine.

#15

- Why? Because she was hitting on you. - Yeah.

#16

...hospitality and flirting are somewhere in that gray area in between.

#17

...it is common courtesy to give a reach around.

#18

Where did you come from, Pierre Garcon?

#19

- Ugh. It smells like cat food in there. - What were you thinking?

#20

...or even be around the Mr. McGibblets ever again.

#21

Fuck.

#22 #23

Consensual my ass, okay?

#24

- You think? - I got a trade in mind.

#25 #26

Dance for me.

#27

This is the TV room.

#28

Hm.

#29

Here's some keys, so you can come back whenever you want.

#30

We got an upright birthday mascot. He's exiting a house carrying a satchel.

#31

Tickle me and rub my belly

#32 #33

Whose smoke shop did you get it at?

#34 #35

No, I ate the leftovers you left in the hallway.

#36

PETE & ANDRE: Whoa!

#37

Pete, look at me. Look at me.

#38

...because today is about you, finding you a woman, and losing your second virginity.

#39

PETE: She does have a sweet can. She also has a nice set of ears.

#40

She's got a nice pair of Sharapovas over there.

#41

- What's up? - Hey, brother. Wasn't expecting you.

#42

She wants to know when you're coming back.

#43

- I mean, who else is gonna show up? - Gentlemen. Mr. Eckhart.

#44

She wants you to put it in her Davenport.

#45 #46

There's also some really beautiful gardens and some nice hiking trails.

#47

Right this way.

#48

But in spite of that, I've been having a great time with my number-one friend, Pete.

#49

And he gave me Plaxico Burress.

#50