Brooklyn Nine-Nine

The men's room was occupied, and I had to dump out.

They're my fish.

- against your will. - Nucci?

but she's clearly in over her head.

In high school, I broke into a bunch of houses

No, it was a good thing.

we're gonna catch him in the act.

I'm breaking you out. I work for Silvio Nucci.

- She's getting us out of here. - Oh.

I'm pretty tough.

I can imagine. He is pretty funny.

- How did he turn you? - Well, I've been dirty

so those idiots don't think we broke you out.

Hey, you know that was Undercover Jake

There are other ways to get money.

Trust me, we are not gonna have any problems with Debbie.

Oh, my God. Do not worry about it.

This one is labeled August 21st.

such childish competitions,

Okay, what about this one? It's hamburgers,

He wants to know if I can do the handoff in two hours.

Oh, Mr. Bean. What a stud.

Hey, well, this is full of ice, but yeah.

Okay, Debbie, what are you doing?

Cool. Cool, cool, cool, cool, cool, cool, cool, cool.

Ah, hey, why don't you let me hold your gun for you,

I thought you said she stinks like [bleep].

Hey, should I drive? You know, that way,

and therefore has to wear this hat I made

I'm taking my time and reading deliberately,

than that dump of a hotel, right?

but I found out this morning that my stupid brother Derek

♪ She's a mansion girl ♪

I would never hurt dogs.

Deborah Lyn, why are you holding a gun?

Ow.

- put some ointment on that. - Right. And when I come back,

you'd probably go run and find your phone

Wait. Yeah, I see it. That's gonna work.

All those psychics were wrong.

- Ooh, like Epcot. - Uhh, yes, Epcot is great.

What the hell, babe?

Oh. Nucci's on his way.

and it all is going according to my plans.

a bunch in one of the ones I read.

- And then James Fogle. - She goes grocery shopping

Debbie, if you just untie us,

- Hmm? - It's when neither hand

and I did it by challenging myself

and I'm destined to win.

No, I'm not a teacher.

until a champion is crowned.

Ah, it's actually the baguette of destiny

my ten minute opening performance.

- What'd you have in mind? - If you win,

But I don't mind.

I don't know. Yes! Yes, you are.

A voluntary administration workshop is fun.

It's a meat throwing challenge.

- If it doesn't, then you're a... - Cold cut?

Take it, and stick this meat.

which mean it is time for another song.

Scully, show 'em what we're working with.

Which is pretty inconvenient,

Yeah, but this is different.

Okay, we're both great at insults. Let's move on.

That's a load of dung.

and you will have an empty tank of private...

Hide from the society that shunned you!

that stink like rotten salmon?

so I'm guessing he's up there.

So if you're not staying here, The Hellevator.

You have to fight for your spot.

- You're pretty hurt, huh? - Yeah.

- That's illegal, and... - Ack-ack-ack-ack!

Secondly, what you did today was incredible.

Charles, flame me.

- You are the bearded lady. - We are all the bearded lady.

Welcome to show business. It waits for no one.

Odd, unless you need it for a unique,

- Jocelyn broke up with me. - What?

Welcome to my most sadistic creation.

I have a chance.

I'm not talking to you.

And Hitchcock's gonna lose!

I would have more time to help with the baby.

to put in your Big Mouth Billy Bass.

This is gonna be rough.

- HR said they're sending a funny guy.

Sara Gilbert.

You're at the nine-nine, and you know what a table is.

she keeps forgetting where she's swimming?

- What's up, squad?

All we have to do is study the crap out of it,

Get busy, ya flope. - Flope?

It's usually big blockbusters like "Finding Dory."

- Okay, this is immediately unhelpful,

to see if he's cheating with a spin instructor named Kendra.

- It says, "Take pill, right jacket po"...

- So what do you think caused Pimento's memory loss?

- Actually, I got a hammer in my car.

but the medication he's on may be making him paranoid.

- Great, so it sounds like he might be getting better.

Thank you.

- Don't have any.

- Oh, Adrian, the back of your gown's open.

that you're leaving for yourself.

- A group of people with a common characteristic

in a truly gigantic font.

- Are you sure that's what the D stands for?

- Ah, I'll go get it. You stay here.

How's it going with Charles?

No, wait a minute, you're the only person

- Oh, perfect.

- Okay, great.

that I have nothing to correct you on.

so I guess we'll spend the next two hours

Now, it could be something small, like a pet peeve, or...

Also, one time, I ate a dog biscuit

I'm so glad you and Amy are taking that step.

- Stop saying that!

Look, you're being unfair.

- Sometimes you can be a little much.

Pimento is gone. - Just like our friendship!

- I dogsat for Scully, and he never thanked me.

Nom, nom.

I'm really proud of you guys,

- Seriously? - Aw.

- We have to find him before his doctor does.

Do you guys only watch kids' movies?

- Oh, please, you're making this way too easy.

- You must have tried to escape out the window

Should I go over here?

separate incidents.

I'm really scared. - Yeah, I know,

but I could really use your help.

From who? Madeline Wuntch, per chance?

What a gigantic turd.

But she seems like a liar.

Step-daddy issues. This is a new thing.

Why would she choose this lame temporary posting here?

And I'm gonna find that "but and drill down on it.

I have a wife and three kids at home.

How do you get such straight margins

Ollies. And the roast beef one that you said.

- I'm not firing you. - I'm impressed by your talent

In my mouth I said I would think about it

Maybe she's just a nice person.

Just because Wuntch signed an order

Bitch?

Their mock trial team gets hired to work real cases.

You only wear sneakers for their literal purpose:

Oh, okay. Well, good luck trying to stop us.

And tonight we're going all the way.

- Oh good, the food. - I'm starving.

if I ever saw you again.

- Yes, John. - Thanks for reminding me, John.

and it's not gonna work for you.

Now you understand? You officiated our wedding.

Come with me, I want to make an introduction.

She's serving my favorite dessert: carrots.

to someone, though.

So Cap tells me you're in "Major Crimes."

It's mostly Broadway stars and celebrity chefs,

Oh, nah. I work out in my garage,

Okay, we've got her meeting the mayor,

In here.

But it came out so smooth I barely even felt it.

Has a new captain moved into my precinct,

That's it, you and me outside.

You seem to working this one spot a lot.

Lieutenant Jeffords has a passion for compassion.

I feel it is quite warm.

Oh, I'll have one of those.

Someone call a doctor.

- Here. - This is all you need.

- Welcome back, Charles. - Oh, right away?

Now let's see if you do know Madeline Wuntch.

What happened? Am I okay?

What? No. That's not true.

Well, you said it so creepy.

Is this Amy-hates-dogs-Amy or Amy-extra-stressed-Amy?

Jake and I agreed to wait at least a year until we tried.

- Santiago! - Ah!

Yeah, I'm gonna get you a pregnancy test.

They're mostly about the dangers of standing.

You're gonna love it. It has robust social features.

♪ Ooh, here he comes

from either the second or third floor

but I'll just go back

on the ground, save it for later.

so you can place it on the ground?

so our shooter must've left here on foot.

Hot dog man, tell them what you told me.

between St. Charles Place and Connecticut Avenue.

Right, we'll do the burn book later.

I haven't seen you since your big news conference

we have a job to do.

the Manhunter.

It's a New York bodega, you can't be too cautious.

I wasn't going to.

Our favorite...

- I can't. - What? Why?

really closely for a noise clue,

Don't have to say it.

You know what, you earned it.

- Hunks! - I have a headline.

I'm just always being given meaningless tasks

Oh, no, I don't want to be a part of this.

How dare you.

that you don't know how to give an order!

No!

I just need, like, some calming noises.

Why is the tent so quiet?

I put a recording device in my girls' room.

I know we got kicked off the case,

Please don't make me help you with this.

and make no impact on the world, or stand up!

- What would that entail? - I'll just show you.

Holt is a great cop,

although he can serve it Razorback-style.

- Okay, cop. - Turn it off.

was just some random bystander on whom you tried to pin it!

Debbie, there's no way you told me that.

Why would any of us have that footage?

Wait, this is about you having to pee?

to care about Debbie.