Corporate

Matt tries not to develop a crush on a new colleague, and Christian buys a news network.

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#2

I got married.

#3

"That's my guy forever."

#4

My wife baked a batch of her famous

#5

But don't worry, everyone,

#6

It was a $10 billion deal.

#7 #8

Married man, here.

#9

Laura left me to be with her kids.

#10

Guess I'll just go make up an excuse to...

#11 #12

What do you think you two are gonna name your kids?

#13

forced to eat eggs from a chicken

#14

The guys brought me these Cubans imported from Canada,

#15

Our wives all packed us lunch.

#16

He sits right outside my office,

#17

The best you can do is arbitrarily choose

#18

Oh, well, I'm calling the police.

#19

You all have made BNN the third-rated

#20

Well, the news is not a tube of toothpaste!

#21

You were on "Dancing with the Stars,"

#22 #23

Now take out the trash.

#24

Just get out there and sell more fucking toothpaste.

#25

You know, I don't believe we've ever met in person,

#26

I figured it'd be weird if we were working together

#27

I just broke out like crazy, 'cause I'm allergic...

#28

However, the Mormon Tabernacle Choir

#29

- Jessica. You don't love Jessica! - ♪ I love you ♪

#30

I guess I never really did love Laura.

#31

These are my wife's seven brothers.

#32

Kate, my wife knows all about our sexual history.

#33

I'm eating.

#34

John, how do I put this harshly?

#35

It's probably an emergency.

#36 #37

every single day and then wake up one morning

#38 #39

Matt, I'm sorry I made fun of your crush.

#40 #41

But I have a little surprise for everyone.

#42

and he met a woman, and they fell in love.

#43

She never tells me."

#44

And as marriages go, they had their ups and their downs.

#45

"...having sex with my secretary...

#46

and had three children of their own,

#47

"Honey, can you tell me, what have you learned

#48

having sex with your sisters and brothers."

#49 #50