Status
Ended
Network
FOX
SEASON
EPISODE

Season 2

Aired 11 years ago - May 14, 2013

Cece's wedding day finds Jess and Nick making a decision about their relationship. Meanwhile, Schmidt schemes with a typically overenthusiastic Winston to sabotage the nuptials, although a shocking announcement may be bigger than anything he plans.

Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 25 (S02E25) - 1
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Cece told me with her eyes.
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Look, Jess, I'm telling you this as Cece's friend and nothing more.
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and you are not to have eye conversations with her.
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But we have to sabotage this wedding.
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You know, I'm 31 now, and it's time for me to cut the nonsense.
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so we are going to enjoy Cece's wedding like adults.
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Hello, Auntie.
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- This wedding means a lot to Jess. - What are you doing?
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Is "sabo" short for sabotage, Schmidt?
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- Thank you. - Now.
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Are you enjoying the wedding festivities, Schmidt?
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Cotton-Eyed...
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Of course!
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Why did you need me for this?
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- at your best friend's wedding? - Because it's exactly
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Phase three.
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Oh, my God.
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Winston is in the air ducts with a badger.
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Oh! He's mad.
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The ducts!
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I'm trying to! I'm trying to turn it off, you idiot!
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May he shower you with many, many children.
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I'm the kind of guy that likes to enjoy the AC, not see how the sausage is made.
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Jess, what are you doing here?
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With Winston and a badger.
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When you complete the seven circles,
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We got to leave it better than when we found it.
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...lovely ceremony with all your family and friends.
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Yes, there is a small part.
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- It's okay. - Jess?
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Do you know?
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I'm on it. Don't scare the badger!
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Or the badger.
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No...
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And I don't care what my family says.
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I want our children to be photographers and...
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I feel slightly rejected.
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Boobies.
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- what we talked about. - Yeah. Look, Jess, it's not...
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It's not like we're in love or anything.
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It's only romantic because it's a wedding.
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It was.
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But can... can we sleep on it, maybe? Maybe take the night?
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Aired 11 years ago - May 07, 2013

Jess' dad chooses the worst day to pay the loft an unexpected visit, forcing a nervous Nick to spend the day alone with him. Jess finds herself with huge opportunity for a new job on the day before Cece's wedding. Schmidt must take a look in the mirror and confront his real feelings about Elizabeth. Meanwhile, Winston psyches himself up for his huge surprise birthday celebration, which no one seemed to remember to throw for him. MORE -LESS

Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 24 (S02E24) - 1
Stop threatening to move, Bernie, and just move!
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Doctors-- no explanation.
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Guess what? I'm at a new school, and there's an opening for a new teacher,
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Amy! Put those back in your shirt, both of them.
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- Oh, no, no, that, uh, that doesn't work. - That's a bad idea.
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- Do not fall for it. - I am falling for it right this second. I'm feeling bad.
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Uncle Shishir!
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and then after you're done having your hands tattooed, take a nap.
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Peg, hi. Thank you so much for the interview.
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Ah, stop! You have to stop!
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with only the human voice.
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- This isn't something we should talk about, Bob, trust me! - Okay, gee whiz, I'm sorry.
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- There's a girl. Yes. - There is, see? I told you.
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Schmidt, do you have a moment?
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I feel like I'm trap... I'm being trapped, am I not?
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Y2 Kitty Kat?
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Without validation, the parking rates are absurd.
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Peg has gone on and on and on and on and on about you.
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So we'll have a
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Now, what if you weren't referring to children...
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So...
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Hey, where my cake at?!
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Lettuce, tomato, lettuce,
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Well, the first thing you got to figure out is what do you want.
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- What is going on over there, Nick?! - Hanging out with my boy Bobby D.
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Cece, hi.
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In a few minutes, we are gonna laugh about this. We will laugh.
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I don't want to make excuses,
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Yes, I do.
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I'll kill you!
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- It's not coming off. - Nope, it's not.
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I slept with Nick last night.
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We haven't had a chance to talk it out yet.
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But I went ahead and got married anyway.
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Yeah I got my own damn cake,
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I have to go back to school now.
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Everything started so good.
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life's messy.
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Look, I want to be with you.
Aired 11 years ago - Apr 30, 2013

In a series of flashbacks, Jess, Nick, Schmidt, Winston and Cece tell one another how they each lost their virginity. Not surprisingly, when they realize the stories directly affect their present day sex lives, one relationship will change forever.

Aired 11 years ago - Apr 09, 2013

Jess decides to throw Cece a surprise bachelorette party while Nick and Winston awkwardly take her fiancé, Shivrang, out for the night. Then, as Schmidt desperately tries to find a real girlfriend in time for the wedding in order to get a “plus one,” he is forced to seek out his old girlfriend from his “fat Schmidt” college days.

Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 22 (S02E22) - 1
Hello... Shivrang? What are you doing here?
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- Get in my room right now, Schmidt. Move. - I'm going to your room right now.
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So you just assume that I won't have a serious partner by then?
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- Not a challenge. - Time to go make some dreams come true.
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I can't stand for more than 60 seconds
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You can look. Don't touch.
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She's coming. Cece'soming.
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Winston! Oh, take the car. Take the car.
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Complete with your favorite game,
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Ankita-ji, this is Jess,
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- Pin the dong. - Pin it. - I can't.
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- Am I right, ladies? - No. - No.
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does that make this my surprise bachelor party?
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- Dead Dad Pass! New topic! - Cece's really freaking out.
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If you want to end this, we need to get a photo of Shivrang's penis.
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What is wrong with you?!
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- Yes! Time for porn cinema. - No!
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But then I offer it to them on a silver platter
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You dated Elizabeth for, like...
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This little... this little one went to market.
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That's what... my whole thing about the whole thing
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- bachelor party game right now. - Mm-hmm, all right.
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 22 (S02E22) - 28
No, it's not... Absolutely not.
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 22 (S02E22) - 29
No bottoms?
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I promise you, this is so not me.
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 22 (S02E22) - 31
and maybe you need to get to know Shivrang a little bit more,
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 22 (S02E22) - 32
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my pajamas, you make me question our entire friendship.
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♪ Keep going till you hit the spot. ♪
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Yeah.
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What is going on... is that, uh...
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All right, all right, enough!
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I have... I have to talk to her.
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 22 (S02E22) - 39
- Shivrang. - What, Shivrang? Shivrang, what?
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 22 (S02E22) - 40
Sorry. I'm so sorry. I immediately regret that.
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I would like to take you to a wedding, because I miss you
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so she gets very sad, and then, breaks off the wedding,
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You stopped listening to me.
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with all my heart.
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That is not his leg.
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- they made you do it. - Oh, it's okay.
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- Hello, you. - What's up, Nadia?
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 22 (S02E22) - 50
But not-not... not here.
Aired 11 years ago - Apr 04, 2013

Jess and Nick, who are caught between friendship and something more, try to break out of relationship-limbo by going on a First Date. Once Schmidt and Winston realize a full-on Jess/Nick romance might be happening, they swoop in to try to sabotage the date

Aired 11 years ago - Mar 26, 2013

When a death occurs in Nick's family, Jess, Schmidt and Winston travel with Nick to the Windy City to help him with the funeral preparations and meet his boisterous family members, including his mom, Bonnie; his younger brother, Jamie; and his Boston cousin, Bobby.

Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 20 (S02E20) - 1
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and there are 50 open tables.
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- 'cause you won't get any food here, loser. - That'll be quite a sign.
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- What would you do? - You're getting screwy.
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Get your daughter to help you with your evil plan.
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Never mind. Listen, we are very sleepy this morning...
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and could you leave the pot in the meantime?
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- Well, well, well. - What?
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This is where you have your breakfast?
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- Can I have a bite? - What?
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 20 (S02E20) - 12
- I'm beginning to like this place. - I'm glad.
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- Make things right with Dean. - I appreciate this.
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- Yes, it is. - Horrible strain.
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Your father is now the president and CEO of the Gilmore Group...
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He consults on matters related to international insurance.
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She's been your father's secretary since you were a child.
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This is simply unacceptable!
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- And she just turned you down? - She had the gall to counteroffer.
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that's keeping her from standing in line for government cheese.
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You should look into that immediately.
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- Until Margie. - Margie was a gem.
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The office is a disaster. Everything is in boxes.
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I hate to see you waste your time.
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It's all in the letter. Read.
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Go on. You have three more 'whats' ahead of you.
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- Didn't ask about the car? - Not once.
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Maybe he's even more terrific than we thought.
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These are résumés for your grandpa's new secretary.
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You're starting to look like you're starring in an independent film.
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- It's freezing in here. - Yes, it has been since I moved in.
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No, I turned it off. Let me show you.
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- How could that happen? - I don't know. Where's your manual?
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So in addition to being heavy and ugly, it's also insulting.
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Mr. Henson. Why, yes, he just walked out. May I take a message?
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- Where the hell are your pens? - Watch your language, young lady.
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- Where does one get these? - Where did you used to get them?
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It goes on until chair mats and floor mats, but if you're not careful...
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Now, what's the first thing you do when you get to the office in the morning?
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Is there no one here whose job it is to actually assist paying customers?
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I don't recognize half the whatsits and doodads in here.
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Then you'll be really happy to have the ones you have left.
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You have to spend money to make money. Tip from me to you.
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- Wise move. - And one for Emily.
Aired 11 years ago - Mar 19, 2013

Jess comes to a conclusion about her romantic feelings for Nick and she struggles to tell him - until she's hopped up on pain medication. But after admitting her feelings, she finds out he may have been keeping something from her. Meanwhile, Schmidt becomes obsessed with buying a fish, which Winston sees as a metaphor for Schmidt's unresolved feelings toward Cece and Nick plans a bar promotion to impress the bar owner. MORE -LESS

Aired 11 years ago - Feb 26, 2013

Jess catches the eye of a professional football player, with whom Winston landed an exclusive interview for his radio station. Meanwhile, Nick and Schmidt argue over the planning of their "TinFinity" party celebrating their tenth anniversary of living together, and Cece gets a surprise offer

Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 18 (S02E18) - 1
Winston, does he think you're Omar Epps?
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Hi, I'm Jess. I'm Winston's roommate.
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Nick... the theme is "masculine garden party."
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Oh, sweet, balloons are...
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I don't want the responsibility.
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Yes, Ma, yes, now, look, I-have to go.
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So that means...
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by how quick this all has been.
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Beautiful job, thank you so much, what a...
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I'm getting that mouth on my mouth, and don't you try to stop me, you...
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I got, like, three of those things.
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Hey, I'm presenting, I'm presenting it.
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For 60 bucks, and they threw in something called
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Yours and El Baño Presidente.
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Here's the good news-- now people have a backup to use...
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I want you to get rid of that.
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Jax, over here on the bench with me.
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You're down.
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What's going on, Sid?
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- Robby, don't dog me like this. - I'm gonna give you your space.
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Get in there, dude, or get out of this party.
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because he likes to talk about his feelings.
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- And just a tip... - Yeah?
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Can't wait to get inside!
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- Tippy go bye-bye. - Okay.
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I'm not crazy.
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Yes, a guy who can tell me exactly how he feels.
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"during that thing,
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- No. You? - Hell, yeah.
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- Oh, your life's together? - Yeah.
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one home!
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You know, he doesn't run.
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Hey, look, I'm sorry about...
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I can have 20 of you.
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it's like I've known you forever.
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Hello. I don't know,
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- This song is for Nick and I! -♪In your glory and your love ♪
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- Yeah. - Are you sure?
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they're going to be married forever.
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♪ To start again with somebody new... ♪
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I'm... I'm innocent. I didn't... I was framed.
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I'm gonna marry you!
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Schmidty? Hey.
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from being a total wiener fest.
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Don't think we need a trip or anything like that, pal.
Aired 11 years ago - Feb 19, 2013

When Schmidt discovers a previously unknown, yet highly-coveted parking spot, Jess and the roommates battle it out to see who will get to use it. Meanwhile, Winston has a hard time finding a condom when he gets an impromptu invitation from Daisy.

Aired 11 years ago - Feb 05, 2013

The gang attends a dating convention, where Cece hopes to find a prospective husband - even as Schmidt hopes to win her back. Meanwhile, Winston's mojo returns, and Jess and Nick get put in a compromising position in front of Dr. Sam.

Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 16 (S02E16) - 1
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just as my mother is finishing her Salt Glow...
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You really think you can avoid Grandma the entire weekend?
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I may even fall asleep on the couch with the TV on.
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- I'll see what I can do. - I'd greatly appreciate it.
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I just thought since this weekend is all about relaxing...
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- What are you guys doing tonight? - It's Friday night.
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She wants us to cancel our dates to study.
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- is of no interest to anyone? - What are you talking about?
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It's bad enough I wasted time crunching the numbers with him...
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All I had to do was move a decimal point, and none of this would have happened.
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If they have ranch dressing in the soap dispensers, this place is great.
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Hello. I'm Emily Gilmore. This is my daughter Lorelai.
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Yes, I'm going to be Ted Nugent.
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Thank you. We're sure we're going to have a wonderful time.
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On the way to your house, I called to confirm our schedule and found...
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- Have some cucumber water. - No, that's not gonna do it...
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Yet another reason to continue the fight to keep physical education in schools.
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J.D. Salinger seems to dig it.
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like 'Rock Star,' 'Evil,' or 'Kafka Was Here. '
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I mean it. From morning till night.
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- Thank you. - You're welcome.
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Having about 40 other people wear it first is part of the secret.
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and minimize the appearance of fine lines.
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like it's some badge of honor not to put on your robe like everyone else.
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Apparently, you didn't see the matching slippers.
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- Are your feet sweating? - Mom?
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Let's see what's next on our agenda, shall we?
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That might be nice.
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but I didn't really think they meant a real mud bath.
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probably while wearing their robes.
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- I haven't been sighing. ... rolling your eyes, mumbling.
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Do you want me to try to get myself another room?
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No, that's two orders of garlic nan, three samosas, and a Chicken vindaloo.
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Forty minutes. Great. Bye.
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Tell me you're trying to get along with her.
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- L... - You're doing laundry.
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- Fine, I'll study with you. - You will?
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 16 (S02E16) - 50
Aired 11 years ago - Jan 29, 2013

Nick and Schmidt go out on a "bro's night," but quickly become infatuated with, and highly competitive over, a beautiful woman attracted to sadness. Meanwhile, Winston falls for a girl with absolutely no interest in him, which only makes him more attracted to her. Then, Jess' decision to have a night alone in the loft doesn't go as planned and involves another round of the drinking game "True American," and a surprising development in her relationship with one of the loft mates. MORE -LESS

Aired 11 years ago - Jan 22, 2013

When Nick is convinced that one of Jess' students is hiding a nefarious secret, he goes undercover in her adult night school class. Meanwhile, Winston has an embarrassing encounter with Cece, causing an examination of all the loft-mate's peculiarities.

Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 14 (S02E14) - 1
Mom's done everything but slap a Dr. Dre ankle bracelet on me.
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That's not in keeping with what their name implies...
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Sadly, because one of the fat ladies met her maker.
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- Can I come in? - I guess.
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There's issues of presentation that need to be addressed.
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- I talk normally. - For the average Willie Nelson roadie...
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Okay. Let's just get going.
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I'm on a business trip here, and I thought I'd check in on Rory.
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A couple of days, or for as long as it takes for them to succumb to my infinite charm.
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- There might even be casualties. - Okay, tell Rory I'll be there.
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Girls, I'm sorry to interrupt The Vinegar Hour, but it's your dad.
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Do you want to hear how I used up my phone time today?
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I have to have this single and you have to get it to me.
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Just move these people out.
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If you don't know, why are you looking?
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- Oh, God. - All right.
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Mrs. O'Malley is impregnable...
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It's heads.
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from which to consider doctor-assisted suicide.
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...either information or the actual means, such as medication or other supplies...
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as a state that has neither a statute nor common law...
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And after all, the absence of prohibition against assisted suicide...
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and what you're doing is shouting, 'Notice me!'
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as the baby-boomer generation enters their graying years...
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to rebut their charge of the cruelty of the act...
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You put up a good fight. Better luck next time.
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She's got good hair. Plus, she's been sitting for an hour...
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- Nice to meet you. - I recognize you from your Christmas card.
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- The famous Sookie. - The famous Christopher.
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I am so beyond thrilled, I can't tell you. All he does is talk about you.
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- Do we hit the vending machines? - Invite them to Luke's?
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It's more of an expression than something I actually heard.
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- Why don't you come and see our place? - That would be great!
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The verbatim transcripts of the debate will be ready in a half-hour.
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They're gonna want something to eat and drink!
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- Hello? - Hi, Dad.
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You were very poised, very sure of yourself, just like your dad.
Aired 11 years ago - Jan 15, 2013

When Nick's con-man father suddenly reappears, Jess tries her best to fix the two men's relationship, despite Nick's fears that he's being used in another one of his dad's gambling schemes. Meanwhile, Schmidt teams up with Robby to try to win back Cece.

Aired 11 years ago - Jan 08, 2013

Jess and Sam go on a weekend getaway with Nick and Angie. But this might not be the trip they expected when Jess starts to party and trouble begins. Could jealousy get in the way of a good time?

Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 12 (S02E12) - 1
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Every time I've had something great, but didn't know what it was...
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Everyday things that I must have witnessed a hundred times before...
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Your mother changed her hair...
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See if you can find the new Chanel patent leather pirate boots...
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watching me and noticing when I move a vase, and...
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he'll go back to ignoring your hair. All will be well.
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The Oppenheimer Award for Excellence in school journalism is not a contest.
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 12 (S02E12) - 12
because of the people who won the Oppenheimer plaque.
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The New York Times, The Wall Street Journal, The Washington Post...
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When I left an hour ago, you were having coffee.
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- We're having roast. - Okay, if that is what you want.
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But I can go to the meeting with you.
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I get my hair done every Wednesday at 3:00.
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I'll see you tonight.
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Dances with Wolves, The Postman.
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- Sold. - I'll get the Hawk.
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These cards are agreements.
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and they were looking at this tape that's kind of mature.
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- Take him where? - I don't care.
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The man is driving me insane.
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And I will do anything to get it. Anything.
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Oh, my God. The most horrible thing happened.
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'to save her mom from spending the entire day with her father...
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So they called my dad, and he came to get me...
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Mom, I promise. Just make it till the afternoon...
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Just do whatever it is you normally would do.
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They were very angry.
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- Quite a place you've got here. - It pays the bills.
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- Get up at 5:45. - Go ahead and order, Lorelai.
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It's important to start the day off correctly.
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but their benefits far outweigh the temporary discomforts...
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Listen. I have my father with me all day.
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the three of us could meet for dinner. How does that sound?
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 12 (S02E12) - 50
- You've got to stop doing that. - I've been doing some research...
Aired 11 years ago - Dec 11, 2012

When the gang attempts to juggle multiple holiday parties in one night, Jess tries to avoid a remorseful Sam, Nick tries to keep up with a sexually adventurous Angie and Winston panics when he gets a cranberry stuck in his ear.

Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 11 (S02E11) - 1
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Do you think the porch is falling apart, or do you weigh a ton?
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Tens of thousands of them. Subterranean, drywood, the whole gamut.
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Kirk, that's crazy.
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- What do I do, tent the place? - To start with, yes.
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- All for the low price of... - I haven't done the exact estimate.
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You can just fix part of the house, the part you like.
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- Eleven, twelve, here. - Thanks.
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Boys. A Nancy Drew mystery.
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- Yeah. Yesterday. - And?
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This morning. I came downstairs, and there they were, sitting on the table.
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Could've knocked me over with a feather.
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- Thank you. - Those are great scores.
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- So, are you? - Am I what?
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Why won't you tell me your score?
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And as soon as you're asleep, you won't, either.
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their tail things and their pointy tentacles.
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You would have to be deaf in one ear not to hear the phone ring 20 or 30 times.
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Absolutely. We can raid the fridge, we can make a nice avocado-mango facemask.
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I'll put my stuff in the guest room.
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- $2,000. - That sucks.
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Well, wait, what's that?
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- Interesting. - What's interesting?
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You organized the 'Save the Historic Oak Tree' campaign.
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I bet there's a room at the inn you could stay in, part-time at least.
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Sometimes I don't stack them properly, and then they fall...
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- Sookie, Jackson's hiding in the closet. - Yes, he is.
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Will you be fine there all night? 'Cause we're staying all night.
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I have a cousin who owns a Xerox company that specializes...
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- Why? - Because you sound too eager.
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Honey, we're making milkshakes. You want to come in and help?
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- Mrs. Kim, hi. I was just... - Out!
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- They move on their own. - See all the furniture in there? Wood.
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What's that moving by your foot? I see something moving.
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We have to stop talking to people.
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I thought it would be interesting to compare...
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- Let me talk to her. - Paris isn't here.
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- Why won't you tell me? - Bye, Paris.
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I've got computer screens feeling sorry for me.
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Of course they'd say yes. And that yes would be followed by:
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- How? - I don't know yet.
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I'm not gonna deal with my parents on this one. No.
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When you resign, you have to put in certain time to get things in order.
Aired 11 years ago - Dec 04, 2012

Tired of taking showers, Jess and Winston scheme to get a bathtub in the loft. Then, at the bar, Nick meets a tough and beautiful customer with boyfriend troubles. Meanwhile, Schmidt is torn between his boss and trying to win back Cece.

Aired 11 years ago - Nov 27, 2012

When Jess learns that a friend is pregnant, both she and Cece panic that time is running out for them to have children. Meanwhile, Schmidt seeks advice on how to please Emma, and Nick and Winston visit the zoo to find inspiration for Nick's zombie-themed novel.

Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 9 (S02E09) - 1
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together with my third-period Shakespeare...
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and interpret the scene in your own individual manner.
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should highlight the themes you see in the scene.
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and I'm sure whatever you two are talking about here...
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It'll be a lot scarier once she gets a megaphone in her hands.
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and put it back together in the science building hallway.
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It's very On the Town.
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That's right. Wow, you don't hear the word 'wedlock' much anymore.
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She's still mulling over the screen tests. We'll find out tomorrow.
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Hello, Mrs. Kim. This is Rory. May I please speak with Lane?
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Tomorrow we look into private school.
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Okay, I'm gone.
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I told you, correct change. Go in for that dollar-bill nonsense...
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Okay. Are you trying to gross me out so I can't eat my burrito?
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- Such perception. - And in one so young and beautiful.
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Unless you're firmly into the coin thing. Then I know a good Automat.
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- Hi. I'm Rory. - Brad. From third-period Shakespeare.
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Besides, we have the death scene. It's classic. It's famous. Who are you?
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and if you plan on missing rehearsal, you'd better bring a coroner's note.
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Fine. You have four other acts to choose from. Take your pick.
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Yes, we have great need. You can be our Romeo.
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Someone's letting her personal feelings interfere with her leadership.
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Wrong. Juliet's supposed to be chaste.
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I did some location scouting this morning, and I think the courtyard...
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- Would you die? - Just hand me the plate.
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- whereas this little guy... - Fernando.
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- I guess I can put my change in him. - Thank you.
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- You just made that up. - I did not.
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Look at this skirt. I'm not hibernating.
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If it'll make you feel any better, I just got asked out the other night.
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- No, like a real burrito. - You've stolen his burrito.
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Honey, come on, every guy doesn't have to be 'the guy. '
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into a cautionary tale of what happens when children disobey their parents.
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- There's a miss-patty. Net? - Have you heard of it?
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Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 9 (S02E09) - 49
- Tristin is in our group. - Yeah, you told me.
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 9 (S02E09) - 50
Because if Tristin sees Dean, he'll tell him...
Aired 11 years ago - Nov 20, 2012

Jess invites her divorced Mom and Dad over for Thanksgiving dinner and enlists Nick and Cece to help her with a "Parent Trap" to reunite them. Meanwhile, Schmidt's cousin, Big Schmidt, visits, and Winston manipulates them into an escalating battle to prove their manhood.

Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 8 (S02E08) - 1
- Nice. - Coffee?
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 8 (S02E08) - 2
- Out! - Wow. So much love.
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 8 (S02E08) - 3
Now, out of respect for you, I'm gonna stop using her name...
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 8 (S02E08) - 4
Didn't have a bookkeeper, accountant, or anything.
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 8 (S02E08) - 5
Otherwise, it's identical.
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 8 (S02E08) - 6
- That could work. - What could work?
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 8 (S02E08) - 7
Or 'The Inn Heading for Bankruptcy'? Kind of long, but nice.
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 8 (S02E08) - 8
Therefore, delivering it was beyond my official obligations...
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 8 (S02E08) - 9
Not some cigar-chomping, dirty-dealing city slicker.
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 8 (S02E08) - 10
- I'm gonna go sit down. - Do that, sweetie.
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 8 (S02E08) - 11
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 8 (S02E08) - 12
even though it's a completely different berry.
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 8 (S02E08) - 13
Could Sookie and I talk to you for a couple minutes?
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 8 (S02E08) - 14
so tell me what's on your mind.
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 8 (S02E08) - 15
- We'd actually like to buy it. - Buy the Dragonfly?
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 8 (S02E08) - 16
You are going to be so successful.
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 8 (S02E08) - 17
I'm the last Westin left, so I plan to own it forever.
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 8 (S02E08) - 18
What happens to the place if you... If forever isn't quite forever?
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 8 (S02E08) - 19
- Well, if you... - Take a long vacation.
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 8 (S02E08) - 20
Okay. I mean a longer vacation than a trip to California.
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 8 (S02E08) - 21
And with that being the case...
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 8 (S02E08) - 22
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 8 (S02E08) - 23
- with a 1000-yard Asian stare thrown in. - That should do it.
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 8 (S02E08) - 24
A crime was committed right in front of my store!
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 8 (S02E08) - 25
- Meaning that there were two crimes. - What?
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 8 (S02E08) - 26
I don't know. I got here, and this is what I found.
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 8 (S02E08) - 27
Who'd be depraved enough to pull a stupid prank like this?
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 8 (S02E08) - 28
When an auditor wants to know why you need such large amounts of those?
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 8 (S02E08) - 29
You, me, Rory, Jackson, Michel, everyone, gray hair, walking around with canes...
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 8 (S02E08) - 30
Not necessarily. Did you look up angina? I forgot to.
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 8 (S02E08) - 31
- You're kidding. When? - I just spotted her walking in.
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 8 (S02E08) - 32
And you're both too beautiful.
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 8 (S02E08) - 33
I had a feeling that a lovely woman was going to be visiting today...
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 8 (S02E08) - 34
I didn't get that, either. Did you get the tapes I sent you?
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 8 (S02E08) - 35
It's a little slow now, so it's no problem.
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 8 (S02E08) - 36
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 8 (S02E08) - 37
- Mia, you know anything about toasters? - Not a damn thing.
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 8 (S02E08) - 38
- Drag. You know that blue coat? - You're not getting it.
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 8 (S02E08) - 39
You don't need me down here, do you?
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 8 (S02E08) - 40
How very John Birch Society of you.
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 8 (S02E08) - 41
- You were a Trekkie? - I was not a Trekkie.
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 8 (S02E08) - 42
- Luke, I need to talk to you right now. - What is it, Taylor?
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 8 (S02E08) - 43
- Are you gonna listen? - What's this got to do with me?
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 8 (S02E08) - 44
- What are you gonna do about it? - About what?
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 8 (S02E08) - 45
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 8 (S02E08) - 46
You are impossible!
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 8 (S02E08) - 47
Do you realize it was 15 years ago, almost to the day?
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 8 (S02E08) - 48
Well, IBM had turned me down for the CEO slot, so I was desperate.
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 8 (S02E08) - 49
- Well, they were so slow. - You were special.
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 8 (S02E08) - 50
Without you, I wouldn't know what to do. I'd be lost.
Aired 11 years ago - Nov 13, 2012

As Jess' job search kicks into high gear, the guys fear her time of the month is also affecting their physical and psychological well-being. Meanwhile, Schmidt begins a "50 Shades of Grey"-type of relationship with his corporate boss, and Nick gains wisdom from an unlikely, hands-on (and mute) source.

Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 7 (S02E07) - 1
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 7 (S02E07) - 2
Like... You know, but less feminine.
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 7 (S02E07) - 3
- Are you gonna walk? - I'm wearing heels.
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 7 (S02E07) - 4
- You don't need all these. - I think I do.
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 7 (S02E07) - 5
Still there, Michel?
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 7 (S02E07) - 6
- This is a sickness. Michel? - I am growing very old.
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 7 (S02E07) - 7
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 7 (S02E07) - 8
You're gonna tip over from the weight of that backpack.
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 7 (S02E07) - 9
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 7 (S02E07) - 10
- Your name's Rory, isn't it? Rory Gilmore? - Yes.
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 7 (S02E07) - 11
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 7 (S02E07) - 12
I am a stickler, yes. I only slipped one time last year.
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 7 (S02E07) - 13
It's a big story. I'm surprised I don't tell it better.
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 7 (S02E07) - 14
I do, sometimes. In class, all the time.
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 7 (S02E07) - 15
with the guy banging the cymbals, it drives me nuts.
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 7 (S02E07) - 16
- I assume you want to go to a university. - Absolutely.
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 7 (S02E07) - 17
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 7 (S02E07) - 18
- What does she expect? - She said, 'Mix it up. '
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 7 (S02E07) - 19
- Don't say that. - Maybe I am a loner.
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 7 (S02E07) - 20
I don't like this. Schools like Chilton try to stamp out...
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 7 (S02E07) - 21
I just want to you know that I overheard, and you're absolutely right.
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 7 (S02E07) - 22
I checked my records to remind myself why I asked you in...
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 7 (S02E07) - 23
Well, I wanted to talk to you about Rory, and this ridiculous accusation...
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 7 (S02E07) - 24
That doesn't surprise me, based on my research.
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 7 (S02E07) - 25
That's good. It means I haven't gotten into trouble.
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 7 (S02E07) - 26
Ms. Gilmore, active participation in Chilton activities for a parent...
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 7 (S02E07) - 27
I hope you're not too busy to do what's best for you...
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 7 (S02E07) - 28
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- What happened? Did you talk to him? - I did.
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 7 (S02E07) - 30
- He what? - He pulled out a file...
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 7 (S02E07) - 31
So we both got busted. Great.
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 7 (S02E07) - 32
saying things like, 'Hey, she's keen, look at her. '
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 7 (S02E07) - 33
- What do you say? Deal? - Deal.
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 7 (S02E07) - 34
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There's a bad draft where I usually sit, kind of like a big downward gust.
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 7 (S02E07) - 36
- Your name is Lori? - Rory.
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 7 (S02E07) - 37
That's Azure, Lily, Celine, Lana, Asia, Anna, and Lem.
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 7 (S02E07) - 38
- Rory, huh? Do they call you 'Ror'? - Not unless provoked.
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 7 (S02E07) - 39
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 7 (S02E07) - 40
Nobody just sits down with them. You have to be invited.
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 7 (S02E07) - 41
My cousin got her internship at the Supreme Court...
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 7 (S02E07) - 42
I didn't mention you.
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 7 (S02E07) - 43
I've done everything except a manicure.
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 7 (S02E07) - 44
My family's name and reputation, not to mention my entire future...
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 7 (S02E07) - 45
You know what? Never mind. Do what you want. I don't care.
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 7 (S02E07) - 46
It's like waking up one day and realizing everyone in your family...
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 7 (S02E07) - 47
- Wow. She really is barbecuing. - Cool.
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 7 (S02E07) - 48
Human beings eat inside with napkins and utensils.
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 7 (S02E07) - 49
- I'm extremely disappointed in you. - Hold on, Mom.
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 7 (S02E07) - 50
That's just incomprehensible.
Aired 12 years ago - Oct 30, 2012

Jess gets a job as a zombie at a haunted house, but is more frightened of her changing feelings towards Sam. Schmidt and Cece are perfectly matched in the costumes they're wearing, while Winston and Shelby are worlds apart in theirs. Nick gets a visit from a former college crush who shows her affection in a scary way.

Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 6 (S02E06) - 1
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 6 (S02E06) - 2
- Don't lie. - A-plus.
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 6 (S02E06) - 3
- Rory. - Yeah?
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 6 (S02E06) - 4
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 6 (S02E06) - 5
Part of the deal of you staying here is that you work here.
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 6 (S02E06) - 6
- Another new one, Emily? - Yes.
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 6 (S02E06) - 7
- What a shame. - It wasn't all dull.
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 6 (S02E06) - 8
He has another family in Salisbury.
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 6 (S02E06) - 9
I can't believe I missed that.
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 6 (S02E06) - 10
His back and knees, very bad knees.
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 6 (S02E06) - 11
- The nose. - Walk around, sweetie.
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 6 (S02E06) - 12
- Sixteen. - That's a nice age.
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 6 (S02E06) - 13
Please. For Emily Gilmore I'm sure they'll bend the rules.
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 6 (S02E06) - 14
It'll be your crowning moment.
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 6 (S02E06) - 15
Her DAR friends are all there, they're talking about...
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 6 (S02E06) - 16
for a person to be properly presented to society.
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 6 (S02E06) - 17
to something that in another universe they would never consider.
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 6 (S02E06) - 18
Do you know what a coming-out party says?
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 6 (S02E06) - 19
- except sheep don't wear hoop skirts. - I promised.
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 6 (S02E06) - 20
All right, then. If you're sure, where do we start?
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 6 (S02E06) - 21
It says your father is supposed to present you at the ceremony.
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 6 (S02E06) - 22
that should weird you out about coming out...
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 6 (S02E06) - 23
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 6 (S02E06) - 24
we headed across the Atlantic, now we're huge with the Nordic set.
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 6 (S02E06) - 25
- Moving on, then. - I have some shocking news.
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 6 (S02E06) - 26
Did you tell her about Barbara Hutton, Doris Duke?
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 6 (S02E06) - 27
but as you will remember, part of the coming-out process involves...
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 6 (S02E06) - 28
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 6 (S02E06) - 29
She has a mother who will hunt you down like a half-price Kate Spade purse...
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 6 (S02E06) - 30
- Christopher. - I'm kidding.
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 6 (S02E06) - 31
He's gonna walk you down the stairs, turn you in a circle, watch you curtsy...
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 6 (S02E06) - 32
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 6 (S02E06) - 33
It's the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame Induction.
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 6 (S02E06) - 34
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 6 (S02E06) - 35
'All escorts must be properly attired...
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 6 (S02E06) - 36
Remember that I'll be watching BattleBots with you for a month.
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 6 (S02E06) - 37
- Thank God I'm here now. - I missed you.
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 6 (S02E06) - 38
and seat belts, and my God, it smells like a forest.
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 6 (S02E06) - 39
Thank you. I love it. I'll look things up right now.
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 6 (S02E06) - 40
Yes, but I didn't think you had.
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 6 (S02E06) - 41
with Linda from marketing, and after two weeks, they give me a paycheck.
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 6 (S02E06) - 42
George Lucas wishes he had this sound system.
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 6 (S02E06) - 43
Next time, instead of a dictionary, just slip her a crisp $20.
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 6 (S02E06) - 44
Mom, there'd have to be a 12-kilometer run and a jujitsu demonstration...
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 6 (S02E06) - 45
- especially if she's sequestered. - You make me tired.
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 6 (S02E06) - 46
- But these have bulldogs on them. Look. - I'll look at them later.
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 6 (S02E06) - 47
You planned this ridiculous affair, you pick up my tuxedo.
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 6 (S02E06) - 48
He just seems a little less jolly than usual.
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 6 (S02E06) - 49
Look each other in the eye. Dean, are you leading?
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 6 (S02E06) - 50
Then when turning, whip your head around and find your spot again.
Aired 12 years ago - Oct 23, 2012

After spending a wild night out with Cece and her model friends, Jess jumps in the driver's seat when she must fill in for Cece at a car show. Meanwhile, the guys question what defines male friendship after Schmidt buys Nick a cookie.

Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 5 (S02E05) - 1
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 5 (S02E05) - 2
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 5 (S02E05) - 3
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 5 (S02E05) - 4
- No, just enough. - Thanks for the input. You can go now.
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 5 (S02E05) - 5
- Okay, now, what is going on? - Nothing.
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 5 (S02E05) - 6
- Your sister's moving here? - No.
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 5 (S02E05) - 7
So she's sending him here, just like that?
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 5 (S02E05) - 8
- You? - Yes.
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 5 (S02E05) - 9
- How old is he? - Seventeen.
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 5 (S02E05) - 10
- I don't know exactly. - You might want to find out.
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 5 (S02E05) - 11
My dad worked all the time and I worked in the store with my dad...
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 5 (S02E05) - 12
She just took off. Married the hot dog king, had a kid, he left.
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 5 (S02E05) - 13
I'm getting him a bed. This is just temporary.
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 5 (S02E05) - 14
I know.
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 5 (S02E05) - 15
I respect that. But what if he turns out to be Fredo?
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 5 (S02E05) - 16
- You do have an extra set of sheets, right? - Yes, I do.
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 5 (S02E05) - 17
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 5 (S02E05) - 18
We're going to sit in the same classroom, share the same oxygen.
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 5 (S02E05) - 19
- I'm well aware of that. - So I'm just suggesting that we coexist.
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 5 (S02E05) - 20
- The paper could be really great this year. - I know.
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 5 (S02E05) - 21
There's going to be a lot of long afternoons and weekends.
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 5 (S02E05) - 22
All of this gets done on weekends.
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 5 (S02E05) - 23
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 5 (S02E05) - 24
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 5 (S02E05) - 25
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 5 (S02E05) - 26
There's the bathroom, there's the closet, there's the dresser...
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 5 (S02E05) - 27
- You need some help? - Nope.
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 5 (S02E05) - 28
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- Rory. - Hey.
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 5 (S02E05) - 32
- Why, I'm shocked. - Wait, just let me check my list here.
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 5 (S02E05) - 33
Is it environmentally safe? What are the financial ramifications?
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 5 (S02E05) - 34
- I'll do it, okay? I'll cover the paving. - Okay, good.
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 5 (S02E05) - 35
I'll be thrilled with next week's scoop on the plumbing installation.
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 5 (S02E05) - 36
If you'll excuse me, I have some reading to do on the origins of concrete.
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 5 (S02E05) - 37
Sorry.
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 5 (S02E05) - 38
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 5 (S02E05) - 39
Way around what? This is Stars Hollow.
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 5 (S02E05) - 40
- Lf he's dumb. - He's fine. New topic.
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 5 (S02E05) - 41
Okay, it's nice to meet you.
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 5 (S02E05) - 42
He probably just realized there are 12 stores in this town...
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 5 (S02E05) - 43
It'll be a little, 'Hey, welcome to Stars Hollow.
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 5 (S02E05) - 44
- You've no idea who I'm talking about. - Solidarity, sister.
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 5 (S02E05) - 45
- Just the paper stuff. The rest was good. - I'm glad to hear it.
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 5 (S02E05) - 46
I saw him in the hallway and I walked the other way.
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 5 (S02E05) - 47
- Especially not on my account, okay? - All right.
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 5 (S02E05) - 48
for the new dodo on the Regis show anytime soon.
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 5 (S02E05) - 49
- Got enough space in the closet? - Plenty.
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 5 (S02E05) - 50
Aired 12 years ago - Oct 09, 2012

Jess and Schmidt are determined to befriend their new, young neighbors; Nick plays a series of pranks on Schmidt.

Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 4 (S02E04) - 1
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 4 (S02E04) - 2
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 4 (S02E04) - 3
Okay, so if we continue on the way we've been going...
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 4 (S02E04) - 4
Actually, I'm gonna be out of town for a couple of days.
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 4 (S02E04) - 5
but you should know we all still love Max. To figure out what happened...
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 4 (S02E04) - 6
Good. I know the kind of work you were gonna put into it.
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 4 (S02E04) - 7
Hopefully, they will all have chatted it out of their systems before we get home.
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 4 (S02E04) - 8
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 4 (S02E04) - 9
we're headed toward Portsmouth, New Hampshire.
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 4 (S02E04) - 10
I myself am not usually a fan of B & B, but Donald's place is different.
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 4 (S02E04) - 11
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 4 (S02E04) - 12
so people ring the bell, and they love to ring the bell.
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 4 (S02E04) - 13
No, I bought this place from Donald last year. It's my place now.
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 4 (S02E04) - 14
I don't care for eclectic. I don't think B & Bers do, either.
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 4 (S02E04) - 15
- A hollow tree, a riverbank, I don't care. - Mom, I'm tired and I'm starving.
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 4 (S02E04) - 16
I'll take you there myself. Let me just grab your bags.
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 4 (S02E04) - 17
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- Are they moving? - It looks like it, doesn't it?
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 4 (S02E04) - 20
If you need anything, you just ring down or come down...
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 4 (S02E04) - 21
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- What? - Dentists.
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 4 (S02E04) - 23
Mom, I'm starving. I'm going down there. You can stay here.
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 4 (S02E04) - 24
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 4 (S02E04) - 25
In three hours, they've participated in every inane B & B group activity known.
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 4 (S02E04) - 26
- I'm not really sleepy. - Me, neither.
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 4 (S02E04) - 27
Because I don't want to.
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 4 (S02E04) - 28
- Because I think you really love him... - Enough!
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 4 (S02E04) - 29
Says the woman with the Hello Kitty waffle iron.
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 4 (S02E04) - 30
- And then, all of a sudden, you're out. - I changed my mind.
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 4 (S02E04) - 31
with dentists singing in the background!
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You have no idea how much.
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 4 (S02E04) - 34
- What's with the face? - They're taller.
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 4 (S02E04) - 35
- 'Satanic forces are at work here. ' Mom. - What?
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 4 (S02E04) - 36
- Last night. - We're good.
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 4 (S02E04) - 37
We're in luck. Breakfast just ended.
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 4 (S02E04) - 38
Hello, strangers.
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 4 (S02E04) - 39
We don't put things like this on the freaking list...
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 4 (S02E04) - 40
So, Ladawn says you're in publishing.
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 4 (S02E04) - 41
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And then when I get home, I'll look them up.
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 4 (S02E04) - 43
The horse learns to bark, and then he...
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 4 (S02E04) - 44
Would you guys excuse me for just a second?
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 4 (S02E04) - 45
Honey, publishing waits for no man. Got to keep the presses pressing.
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 4 (S02E04) - 46
- You've been sitting there for two hours. - I want one more coffee.
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 4 (S02E04) - 47
It worked just like you wanted, with one notable exception.
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 4 (S02E04) - 48
He's coming over. Hang on.
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 4 (S02E04) - 49
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In fact, everyone's coffee is on the house today.
Aired 12 years ago - Oct 02, 2012

Jess and Nick discuss their relationship; Schmidt pretends to be one of Mitt Romney's sons in hope of landing a date with a beautiful Republican.

Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 3 (S02E03) - 1
'We have buried the putrid corpse of liberty. '
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I've got a Nikon, too.
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 3 (S02E03) - 7
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How about lunch and the cost of the film?
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 3 (S02E03) - 9
'cause it's here you'll be going to.
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- Do you have to be there while they work? - What do you mean?
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- You think you're ready for me? - I'm always ready for you.
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- So what are we doing tonight? - I'll do whatever.
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 3 (S02E03) - 13
We could watch Holy Grail on tape again.
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 3 (S02E03) - 14
- No, it's not. It's on the 24th. - That was our old anniversary.
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 3 (S02E03) - 15
- So a double date? With adults? - No, just with Mom and Max.
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They're well spread apart, the 6th and the 24th.
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 3 (S02E03) - 17
- I've got numerous scars. - I cut you that one, two times...
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- Grow our hair long and stop bathing. - Please don't.
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 3 (S02E03) - 20
- 'if it's the last thing I do. ' - He so jinxed himself with that one.
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 3 (S02E03) - 21
- Let's do some jumping jacks. - Spread out.
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 3 (S02E03) - 22
You're talking through parts we talked through last time.
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 3 (S02E03) - 23
- With longer legs. - Even if we all left for the phone...
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- Electra Woman? - I think it's time to turn in.
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This is weird.
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- You like Max. - No. Yes, I do, but it's weird.
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No. Wake up.
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 3 (S02E03) - 29
- nothing will ever be the same again. - I know.
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- could never possibly have conceived. - Like the giant ants in Them!?
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 3 (S02E03) - 31
I don't remember ever walking around in the buff.
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I'm gonna call you Funny Bottoms from now on.
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- Can you clear that one off? - Why?
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 3 (S02E03) - 36
Reading three papers all reporting the same news is a terrific use of trees.
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 3 (S02E03) - 37
- This isn't a very financially-oriented town. - Yes, it's more oriented to coffee.
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 3 (S02E03) - 38
- I'll just be a minute. - It's okay, we'll wait.
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Not when it's a matter of dire public safety...
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Well, it could always be taken out with your bare hands or your teeth.
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You know, I have to make some calls about this thing before it's too late.
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 3 (S02E03) - 45
- Am I exaggerating? - Nope.
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 3 (S02E03) - 46
I'm not confused. I'm just... What do you mean?
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 3 (S02E03) - 47
- And go with their bits. - Their bits?
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 3 (S02E03) - 48
That one I knew.
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- You have much knowledge. - You got that from Rory.
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Aired 12 years ago - Sep 25, 2012

Jess pretends she's someone else when a handsome stranger mistakes her for his blind date. Meanwhile, a patron at Nick's bar claims to be Nick from the future, and Winston's disapproving mother pays him a visit.

Aired 12 years ago - Sep 25, 2012

Jess is laid off from her teaching job and volunteers to be a shot girl at Schmidt's "rebranding" party.

Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 1 (S02E01) - 1
Okay, you can take another one.
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 1 (S02E01) - 2
- Goodness, the smell, man. - We have done nothing but love you, Schmidt.
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Nick, your brand is gypsy alcoholic handyman.
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Not a party; A rebranding event.
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my badminton partner, my financial planner,
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Jess, oh, my God.
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I'm overthinking it. The hat's fine.
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Is this making you feel better?
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- I get that, actually. - And only you
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but then I grew up.
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- I'm wearing a suit. - A suit? Please.
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I'm going to go to my room and process what just happened.
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So I just want you to go about your day and act normal.
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- Act normal, okay? - If that's what you want.
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My boobs are loving this unemployed thing.
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"I'm Nick. I hate sunshine.
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I don't have it today. I don't know what it is.
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- What are you...? - Hire me. I am a people person.
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 1 (S02E01) - 21
Tonight is about one man's functioning penis.
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- She doesn't have it. - Are you saying I'm not hot?
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 1 (S02E01) - 23
Add on top of that two years of light tap and jazz.
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Yeah, interesting choices.
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- You like someone? - Good stuff.
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I don't work with amateurs.
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Thank you for your honesty.
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they still call that "Schmidting the bed."
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Yes! My penis is working!
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I'm really glad that you came.
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- Flip it, man, flip it! - I'm flipping it!
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And here comes the weirdness.
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Oh, there's one right there. Didn't see that one before.
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This feels good. I'm gonna go.
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 1 (S02E01) - 38
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The only thing easier than this
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So stop feeling sorry for yourself, kid,
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♪ Sexy girl all around the world ♪
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♪ Just shake your hips and put that ass to work ♪
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Luckily, I've got something up my sleeve.
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 1 (S02E01) - 44
Shot girl!
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Hey, J-Jess, Jess.
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Fire...
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Um, this is definitely real fire.
Recap of New Girl Season 2 Episode 1 (S02E01) - 48
Cece, watch this one.
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You really scared him.
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We are far too alike.