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Son of Zorn

S1 E9
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FOX
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Season 1  "The War On Grafelnik"  1x9

Aired 8 years ago - Dec 11, 2016

Torn between Edie’s Christmas and Zorn’s Grafelnik – the Zephyrian holiday of revenge – Alan realizes he can play his parents off each other to get better presents.

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Recap of Son of Zorn Season 1 Episode 9 (S01E09) - 1
- than that German exchange student. - Helmut?
 Recap of Son of Zorn Season 1 Episode 9 (S01E09) - 2
It's like Christmas, but not at all.
 Recap of Son of Zorn Season 1 Episode 9 (S01E09) - 3
- the traditional Grafelnik greeting. - Oh, Grafel...
 Recap of Son of Zorn Season 1 Episode 9 (S01E09) - 4
Oh, my God, I can't believe you fell for it.
 Recap of Son of Zorn Season 1 Episode 9 (S01E09) - 5
Recap of Son of Zorn Season 1 Episode 9 (S01E09) - 6
and then it would be too late for you to do anything about it.
 Recap of Son of Zorn Season 1 Episode 9 (S01E09) - 7
My dad came to our house dressed as you-know-who.
 Recap of Son of Zorn Season 1 Episode 9 (S01E09) - 8
It was like my Vietnam, without the hookers.
 Recap of Son of Zorn Season 1 Episode 9 (S01E09) - 9
Ever since that moment, whenever I see Santa,
 Recap of Son of Zorn Season 1 Episode 9 (S01E09) - 10
Like, it's that easy to be a therapist?
 Recap of Son of Zorn Season 1 Episode 9 (S01E09) - 11
Geez, I guess it really is that easy to become a therapist.
 Recap of Son of Zorn Season 1 Episode 9 (S01E09) - 12
Recap of Son of Zorn Season 1 Episode 9 (S01E09) - 13
Recap of Son of Zorn Season 1 Episode 9 (S01E09) - 14
asking for all the revenge you want.
 Recap of Son of Zorn Season 1 Episode 9 (S01E09) - 15
- who can't afford gifts. - Great.
 Recap of Son of Zorn Season 1 Episode 9 (S01E09) - 16
- Boom! And there. - Wow, you know,
 Recap of Son of Zorn Season 1 Episode 9 (S01E09) - 17
Why don't we ignore Grafelnik entirely, like everyone else on Earth.
 Recap of Son of Zorn Season 1 Episode 9 (S01E09) - 18
- I will take Alan from 7:00 to 9:30. - I'm not getting up at 7:00.
 Recap of Son of Zorn Season 1 Episode 9 (S01E09) - 19
So you take the afternoon.
 Recap of Son of Zorn Season 1 Episode 9 (S01E09) - 20
Hey, either way, I win. If he chooses me, I win.
 Recap of Son of Zorn Season 1 Episode 9 (S01E09) - 21
- how meaningful our... - ...holiday traditions will be.
 Recap of Son of Zorn Season 1 Episode 9 (S01E09) - 22
Then I'll just remind him about the high suicide rate
 Recap of Son of Zorn Season 1 Episode 9 (S01E09) - 23
Fine, I guess I'll just tell him I have cancer.
 Recap of Son of Zorn Season 1 Episode 9 (S01E09) - 24
In fact, right at this moment, she's probably spending
 Recap of Son of Zorn Season 1 Episode 9 (S01E09) - 25
Are you kidding me?
 Recap of Son of Zorn Season 1 Episode 9 (S01E09) - 26
"Craig, you have to come spend the holidays with us in Ohio."
 Recap of Son of Zorn Season 1 Episode 9 (S01E09) - 27
to spend the holidays with me to my own selfish ends.
 Recap of Son of Zorn Season 1 Episode 9 (S01E09) - 28
- What? - Oh, nothing. I like the glitter on this one.
 Recap of Son of Zorn Season 1 Episode 9 (S01E09) - 29
Yeah, um, she said she might get me a 4K projector.
 Recap of Son of Zorn Season 1 Episode 9 (S01E09) - 30
- it's gonna be magical jewelry, so... - He's bribing you with gifts?
 Recap of Son of Zorn Season 1 Episode 9 (S01E09) - 31
I guess I better get started on a list.
 Recap of Son of Zorn Season 1 Episode 9 (S01E09) - 32
on a Friday night ever again.
 Recap of Son of Zorn Season 1 Episode 9 (S01E09) - 33
I'm just nervous because once, I saw Santa beat up somebody
 Recap of Son of Zorn Season 1 Episode 9 (S01E09) - 34
I thank Jesus every day Jane told my mom
 Recap of Son of Zorn Season 1 Episode 9 (S01E09) - 35
I like that idea, but I'm-a do you one better.
 Recap of Son of Zorn Season 1 Episode 9 (S01E09) - 36
I got your big Grafelnik gift a little early.
 Recap of Son of Zorn Season 1 Episode 9 (S01E09) - 37
or dangerous than this, so I guess you win.
 Recap of Son of Zorn Season 1 Episode 9 (S01E09) - 38
- Ooh. - Happy Grafelnik!
 Recap of Son of Zorn Season 1 Episode 9 (S01E09) - 39
Ho-ho hold up. What is going on here?
 Recap of Son of Zorn Season 1 Episode 9 (S01E09) - 40
I prescribe for you...
 Recap of Son of Zorn Season 1 Episode 9 (S01E09) - 41
Dude! I got, like, the best gift ever. My plan worked
 Recap of Son of Zorn Season 1 Episode 9 (S01E09) - 42
- Zorn, we need to talk. - Oh, did you come here
 Recap of Son of Zorn Season 1 Episode 9 (S01E09) - 43
But I overheard him scheming on the phone.
 Recap of Son of Zorn Season 1 Episode 9 (S01E09) - 44
Christmas, Edie? No, thank you.
 Recap of Son of Zorn Season 1 Episode 9 (S01E09) - 45
I would have broken the hammer last,
 Recap of Son of Zorn Season 1 Episode 9 (S01E09) - 46
Ooh.
 Recap of Son of Zorn Season 1 Episode 9 (S01E09) - 47
God, that sounds great.
 Recap of Son of Zorn Season 1 Episode 9 (S01E09) - 48
Recap of Son of Zorn Season 1 Episode 9 (S01E09) - 49
I'm gonna destroy everything she loves!
 Recap of Son of Zorn Season 1 Episode 9 (S01E09) - 50
Craig!

Or scroll and see one by one:

Recap of Son of Zorn Season 1 Episode 9 (S01E09) - 2
It's like Christmas, but not at all.
#2 Recap of Son of Zorn Season 1 Episode 9 (S01E09) - 3
- the traditional Grafelnik greeting. - Oh, Grafel...
#3 Recap of Son of Zorn Season 1 Episode 9 (S01E09) - 4
Oh, my God, I can't believe you fell for it.
#4 Recap of Son of Zorn Season 1 Episode 9 (S01E09) - 5 #5 Recap of Son of Zorn Season 1 Episode 9 (S01E09) - 6
and then it would be too late for you to do anything about it.
#6 Recap of Son of Zorn Season 1 Episode 9 (S01E09) - 7
My dad came to our house dressed as you-know-who.
#7 Recap of Son of Zorn Season 1 Episode 9 (S01E09) - 8
It was like my Vietnam, without the hookers.
#8 Recap of Son of Zorn Season 1 Episode 9 (S01E09) - 9
Ever since that moment, whenever I see Santa,
#9 Recap of Son of Zorn Season 1 Episode 9 (S01E09) - 10
Like, it's that easy to be a therapist?
#10 Recap of Son of Zorn Season 1 Episode 9 (S01E09) - 11
Geez, I guess it really is that easy to become a therapist.
#11 Recap of Son of Zorn Season 1 Episode 9 (S01E09) - 12 #12 Recap of Son of Zorn Season 1 Episode 9 (S01E09) - 13 #13 Recap of Son of Zorn Season 1 Episode 9 (S01E09) - 14
asking for all the revenge you want.
#14 Recap of Son of Zorn Season 1 Episode 9 (S01E09) - 15
- who can't afford gifts. - Great.
#15 Recap of Son of Zorn Season 1 Episode 9 (S01E09) - 16
- Boom! And there. - Wow, you know,
#16 Recap of Son of Zorn Season 1 Episode 9 (S01E09) - 17
Why don't we ignore Grafelnik entirely, like everyone else on Earth.
#17 Recap of Son of Zorn Season 1 Episode 9 (S01E09) - 18
- I will take Alan from 7:00 to 9:30. - I'm not getting up at 7:00.
#18 Recap of Son of Zorn Season 1 Episode 9 (S01E09) - 19
So you take the afternoon.
#19 Recap of Son of Zorn Season 1 Episode 9 (S01E09) - 20
Hey, either way, I win. If he chooses me, I win.
#20 Recap of Son of Zorn Season 1 Episode 9 (S01E09) - 21
- how meaningful our... - ...holiday traditions will be.
#21 Recap of Son of Zorn Season 1 Episode 9 (S01E09) - 22
Then I'll just remind him about the high suicide rate
#22 Recap of Son of Zorn Season 1 Episode 9 (S01E09) - 23
Fine, I guess I'll just tell him I have cancer.
#23 Recap of Son of Zorn Season 1 Episode 9 (S01E09) - 24
In fact, right at this moment, she's probably spending
#24 Recap of Son of Zorn Season 1 Episode 9 (S01E09) - 25
Are you kidding me?
#25 Recap of Son of Zorn Season 1 Episode 9 (S01E09) - 26
"Craig, you have to come spend the holidays with us in Ohio."
#26 Recap of Son of Zorn Season 1 Episode 9 (S01E09) - 27
to spend the holidays with me to my own selfish ends.
#27 Recap of Son of Zorn Season 1 Episode 9 (S01E09) - 28
- What? - Oh, nothing. I like the glitter on this one.
#28 Recap of Son of Zorn Season 1 Episode 9 (S01E09) - 29
Yeah, um, she said she might get me a 4K projector.
#29 Recap of Son of Zorn Season 1 Episode 9 (S01E09) - 30
- it's gonna be magical jewelry, so... - He's bribing you with gifts?
#30 Recap of Son of Zorn Season 1 Episode 9 (S01E09) - 31
I guess I better get started on a list.
#31 Recap of Son of Zorn Season 1 Episode 9 (S01E09) - 32
on a Friday night ever again.
#32 Recap of Son of Zorn Season 1 Episode 9 (S01E09) - 33
I'm just nervous because once, I saw Santa beat up somebody
#33 Recap of Son of Zorn Season 1 Episode 9 (S01E09) - 34
I thank Jesus every day Jane told my mom
#34 Recap of Son of Zorn Season 1 Episode 9 (S01E09) - 35
I like that idea, but I'm-a do you one better.
#35 Recap of Son of Zorn Season 1 Episode 9 (S01E09) - 36
I got your big Grafelnik gift a little early.
#36 Recap of Son of Zorn Season 1 Episode 9 (S01E09) - 37
or dangerous than this, so I guess you win.
#37 Recap of Son of Zorn Season 1 Episode 9 (S01E09) - 38
- Ooh. - Happy Grafelnik!
#38 Recap of Son of Zorn Season 1 Episode 9 (S01E09) - 39
Ho-ho hold up. What is going on here?
#39 Recap of Son of Zorn Season 1 Episode 9 (S01E09) - 40
I prescribe for you...
#40 Recap of Son of Zorn Season 1 Episode 9 (S01E09) - 41
Dude! I got, like, the best gift ever. My plan worked
#41 Recap of Son of Zorn Season 1 Episode 9 (S01E09) - 42
- Zorn, we need to talk. - Oh, did you come here
#42 Recap of Son of Zorn Season 1 Episode 9 (S01E09) - 43
But I overheard him scheming on the phone.
#43 Recap of Son of Zorn Season 1 Episode 9 (S01E09) - 44
Christmas, Edie? No, thank you.
#44 Recap of Son of Zorn Season 1 Episode 9 (S01E09) - 45
I would have broken the hammer last,
#45 Recap of Son of Zorn Season 1 Episode 9 (S01E09) - 46
Ooh.
#46 Recap of Son of Zorn Season 1 Episode 9 (S01E09) - 47
God, that sounds great.
#47 Recap of Son of Zorn Season 1 Episode 9 (S01E09) - 48 #48 Recap of Son of Zorn Season 1 Episode 9 (S01E09) - 49
I'm gonna destroy everything she loves!
#49 Recap of Son of Zorn Season 1 Episode 9 (S01E09) - 50
Craig!
#50