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Better Things

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Season 2

2x10 "Graduation"

Aired 7 years ago - Nov 16, 2017

Sam and fam are tilted in the Season 2 finale.

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there was a hookah?

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Like, just take a breath and listen.

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let me have this.

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You guys planned this?

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It's whatever you want.

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PHYLLIS: So how are you going to do this?

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You got to start waking up.

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Now bite down into this.

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But you should rub it on your feet.

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where we're going for lunch, 'cause he's

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Wait. Oh, my God.

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Good to see you too.

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How are you, Marion? Buddy. What are you, grabbing my ass?

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Hey! (starts vocalizing "Another Op'nin', Another Show")

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Oh! Oh, we have to go. (gasps) Come on.

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Thank you. Thank you.

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It's very complicated.

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I'm... I'm not coming. (Marion continues coughing)

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(sighs) PHYLLIS: What happened? Why is she crying?

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(clears throat loudly)

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Can I say one thing to you?

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And, like, this is stupid.

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I really don't want...

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2x9 "White Rock"

Aired 7 years ago - Nov 09, 2017

Sam and the girls go on a trip.

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I would have. So good on you.

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I want to learn to do that. Well,

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I didn't tell her I was coming, Lester.

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there was a lady that went to that beach,

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Wow. That's crazy.

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and Marion. And we were taken...

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Uh... did I just shoot the Pope at supper?

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since they... put her there.

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They're poison.

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* Let me see it

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Families fall apart, Mom.

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Yeah, well, you guys didn't and we're all miserable.

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but it's kind of your fault that Harvey's sleeping with Paisley.

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and the number of the place.

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and she was shut out.

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Do you know about the thing?

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if my crazy auntie is dead or not, and then let me know.

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Which means this was a very

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* I stumbled onto heaven...

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And you're starting to catch a glimpse

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I'm nervous. Whew.

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What are you after?

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who's a full-time job just to listen to. (sighs)

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and he never stopped talking.

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It needs another 20 minutes at least.

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These are the last ones I ever saw.

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Well, you didn't, did you?

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Well, I thought

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Oh, my goodness, why am I laughing?

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I don't know if you're here right now

2x8 "Arnold Hall"

Aired 7 years ago - Nov 02, 2017

Sam gets confronted.

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The performance is tomorrow.

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they have other commitments.

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No, actually, I think they're just dating.

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would love to have a little lunch

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Hey. Why don't you two run off backstage,

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your fantasies here; it's just that they're growing up.

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I would like to talk about Xander.

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for the good of the children,

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I mean, what do you want me to say here?

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And if you think, now, that I'm gonna volunteer

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Write him a check; you're doing fine.

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when the strings are cut:

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This is like a bad dream.

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Yes! Yes, please!

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Thank you for bringing my girls.

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It's really cool.

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Oh, I know this story, believe me.

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for the rest of his life.

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You're gonna do it.

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a celebration of Push

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Actresses have a shelf life,

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You need an exit strategy. There's no way

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You're gonna have to start wearing a yarmulke, Sam.

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Mom, look at Mr. Cohen.

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Oh, thank you. Oh, my God, Frankie got so big.

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Like you could work at McDonald's as a vomit cleaner.

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a great job for an old bald lady.

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What a night for you-- you're a man now.

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and you probably will until you're about 23,

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were in kindergarten, and we used to cry and cry

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reading in Hebrew and Jewing it up

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Barb? And somehow,

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we come together

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Are you kidding me? It was amazing.

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There are children here, Sunny.

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Yeah. We need drinks.

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Did it? Yeah, it's fine.

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Good for you. Hmm, good for him.

2x7 "Blackout"

Aired 7 years ago - Oct 26, 2017

Sam does hard things.

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- Well, because... Oh.

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It's the lights. It's not in our phones.

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Landlines are bullshit now... They're...

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You don't need candles, Sam... It's still light out.

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Gran. I got to check on Gran.

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Hi, Mrs. Geronimus.

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- What-what if you're wrong? - What?

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- Should be back up in a minute. - Okay.

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- by other memorials to mankind?

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- What for? We're fine. - Yeah, I know,

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Okay, where do I get one of those?

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♪ 888-88... ♪ ♪ 888-88... ♪

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- You're Bob. - Yes. Bob.

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- or a Merlot skirt... - What?

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- If I see one, I'll get you one. - Thank you.

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♪ And I'm her ol' dad ♪

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- Yee-hee! - Yee-haw!

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You realize you do ten times more for her

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- right over here? - Sure, that'd be great.

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I'd really rather not, Jeff, thanks for asking.

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I do, actually.

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I'm fighting moment to moment just to feel normal.

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It's like if you took me to an alien store

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and then they put it in the trunk while you're checking out,

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Anyway, thanks for helping me out, buddy. I appreciate it.

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with the whole, uh,

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You know that I couldn't show up for my marriage.

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every mom, dad, teacher, they look at me like I'm shit,

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who sucks at one thing.

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you're just not a whole piece of shit.

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♪ We belong to you and me ♪

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No. No, no, no, no,

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No. No. No. No,

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2x6 "Eulogy"

Aired 7 years ago - Oct 19, 2017

Sam demands satisfaction.

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As steady as you can, anyway...

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I'm not paying for this.

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You guys, the problem is you're great performers.

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They want to see him fail.

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♪ Let 'em unload ♪

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That's all right. At least we're sitting down.

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Okay, everybody settle.

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Is there anything different

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- Think Macbeth, all right? - Okay.

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Really? I don't think...

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- Ha-ha. - Fired, or...

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No, no, no, no, no.

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Cut! Cut! Reset!

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- Wha... - I'm just kidding. I'm just kidding.

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- Okay. - We'll catch up soon.

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What about just being a little girl?

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I don't know... it just sucks that you didn't go back.

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about how they were always inspired by your career.

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I really could die, bitch; I'm giving you realness.

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Your mom is an actor,

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Mom, you're being dramatic.

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And it is my job to be proud of you.

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This is my funeral.

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without telling me, and we had to go way up the canyon,

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Let's hear any feelings about me at all.

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She's always the victim.

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Unless you want to hear what I have to say,

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- Really? - Yeah!

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I got this, babe.

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♪ In the stories, the lies that they wrote ♪

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♪ Where I put things ♪

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her surviving daughters, Frankie and Max,

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♪ I saw God ♪

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Quiet are the dead.

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she did, amazing things.

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2x5 "Phil"

Aired 7 years ago - Oct 12, 2017

Sam is forced to look at some stuff.

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It says that you're applying to re-mortgage this house.

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So I'm canceling...

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and ask you to never do this again.

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You'll notice the resemblance with the Impressionists,

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I get to the end of a day, and I'm...

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I'll leave here... never come back.

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Whoops? Too soon?

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Oh. Oh, so I'm too late?

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The ones where you're wearing the hat?

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- Okay. - Okay.

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I know that, kid, but did you hear what the doctor said?

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we need to talk.

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I just... don't... think

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And I need to make a move.

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Like, ambush her.

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Because I need you to be part of this.

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That's what I needed to hear.

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Which was hilarious, because he hadn't spoken to me in years.

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And there was just me. Mmm.

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- Wow! - It was awesome.

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You've... like, on a daily basis, we'd get along great.

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I just kept him... hydrated and clean until he died.

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You know that, don't you?

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2x4 "Sick"

Aired 7 years ago - Oct 05, 2017

Sam is sick.

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Don't you like him?

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He's quirky. I like it.

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You think with your vagina.

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Thank you. Max, you have a shot.

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Does it have to be my firstborn?

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Max, you have to drive.

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to spend the weekend with me in El Cevitas,

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Asking you to spend the weekend, so...

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and I don't want to wait until next weekend to see you again,

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No, I mean, you know, please go ahead.

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It was really good.

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I can't believe I'm old enough to drink.

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- Yay! - We love you.

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So, uh, just wanted to say that, okay?

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My God, Mom, that's so offensive.

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No, Mom, don't leave us with Susie. She sucks.

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There's nothing in this house that's worth anything to me,

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- on Saturday. - What are you doing at Chloe's?

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I'll cosign the lease right now to make that happen.

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If I have two minutes, I watch murder shows on cable.

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I, uh, fantasize about being murdered.

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and they find hairs on the guy's knife

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on earning and-and raising her.

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I swear, if... if her mom was dead,

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Well, a-anyway, that's, that's what I think is good

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That was a really lovely thing you did,

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2x3 "Robin"

Aired 7 years ago - Sep 28, 2017

Sam gets a new friend.

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He's not even your teacher, and he's hot.

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You would do that?

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Don't be stupid.

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Yeah, I have to drive?

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Your life needs to move forward.

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uh, have some great food,

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I know it's-it's early for me to be asking you

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and I don't want to wait until next weekend to see you again,

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Thank you for asking.

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It was really good.

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I'm, uh, hanging up now.

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She's going to the moon, bitch.

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except the art.

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We're like orphans now.

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I could jack off to real people being murdered for hours.

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and they find hairs on the guy's knife

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Yeah. Yeah, really, really bad.

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It would've been a whole lot easier if we had lost her.

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about having kids because,

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I'm not getting wet stone. Are you?

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about that is I hate surprises very, very much.

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Do you... do you... do you want to know

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Oh, no, no, no.

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Do you know what I'm saying, buddy?

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Now, I planned this trip very carefully, and...

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Well, I didn't mean to ice-pack your balls.

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sometimes my levels of...

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I love venison.

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I don't know why those are here.

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No, no, it's not okay.

2x2 "Rising"

Aired 7 years ago - Sep 21, 2017

Sam clears her head.

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Because, after, I just want to go home and...

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are lies and bad news.

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That's our thing, so kids... Yeah.

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But that's so cool. Is that your wedding ring?

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Why would I drive you home?

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"I didn't not like having sex with you."

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Like just common courtesy would be nice.

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That is so insulting.

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You're such pussies.

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I'm sorry if I'm not the Marlboro Man.

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You want to know how I feel about you?

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I mean, that's how nice I am.

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(chuckles) Well, that's true, honey,

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Because she talks about it all the time.

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Duke! (giggling)

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I'm sitting for my kid in Sunny's house,

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You know what would help?

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at her new rich boyfriend's house in Santa Barbara.

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But I understand what you mean.

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Bye, Mama! I love you!

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I just need you to stay with Bottle for two days.

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Oh, you're welcome.

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How's everything going today?

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You know, I could get used to this.

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I'm on the plane. I'll call you when we land.

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and figure your stuff out, okay? (chuckling)

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I really don't want to do it! Calm your tits. Mace, Mace!

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Don't hit your head. I'll see you there.

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My home is called "House Full of Tiny Assholes with Vaginas."

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(men singing in Spanish, women chattering quietly)

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SUNNY: You're hilarious. Yes.

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...make some introductions here quickly.

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Not here is good. Yeah.

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I love the beach. I always... Yeah.

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("Release Me" by Corrina Repp playing)

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♪ I die, I die ♪

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♪ Sing a lullaby ♪

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You're, like, such a G.

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2x1 "September"

Aired 7 years ago - Sep 14, 2017

Sam has people over.

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Mmm. I don't know, it depends. Did you make it?

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Not like her dad?

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Why don't you guys come in and grab some whatever.

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I never kissed a boy like that.

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That's the same

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No, it's really not, but it's what's going on.

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You were the director?

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Hey, Mark. How's it going?

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What are you doing?

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Ah! I'm gonna get another vodka.

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and a little bit of hash smoke in my lungs.

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Oh, my God. Okay.

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Duke, tone it down with them.

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♪ From night till dawn ♪

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- Now, go. - Oh.

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Oh, sure. That's where

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it's exhilarating.

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I still don't have enough information

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Are you asking me

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You're asking me

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Why don't you give me some specifics, Pedro?

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Hmm. Excuse me.

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So, what can I do for you?

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And it's all just fine.

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world-traveling, many-diseased man

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And I... I hate saying this to you.

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such a thrill to be with an older guy.

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to tell him once...

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Can I, uh, have a word with you two gentlemen

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I should say good night to her.