S3 E14
Status
Ended
Network
CBS
SEASON
VIEW ALL EPISODE

Season 3  "Private Charles Lamb"  3x14

Aired 47 years ago - Dec 31, 1974

A Greek Colonel thanks the 4077th by giving them food and drink for an Easter celebration. Bu the feast is foiled when softhearted Radar saves the main course from the spit - a lamb, which Radar tricks Henry into giving a medical discharge and sends home to Ottumwa, Iowa. Thus, Hawkeye and Trapper invent the famed Spam Lamb! Meanwhile, a soldier who had shot himself to get out of the army confesses to Frank, thinking he is Father Mulcahy.

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Recap of M*A*S*H Season 3 Episode 14 (S03E14) - 1
[Hawkeye Narrating] Dear Dad: The wounded keep coming and coming.
Recap of M*A*S*H Season 3 Episode 14 (S03E14) - 2
to Plato, Plutarch, Aristotle, Socrates.
Recap of M*A*S*H Season 3 Episode 14 (S03E14) - 3
handed down concepts that are in use today.
Recap of M*A*S*H Season 3 Episode 14 (S03E14) - 4
Of course, they didn't make temple calls.
Recap of M*A*S*H Season 3 Episode 14 (S03E14) - 5
- I've seen worse. - Will it have to come off?
Recap of M*A*S*H Season 3 Episode 14 (S03E14) - 6
I guess it's the same as cows lying down on all fours just before it rains.
Recap of M*A*S*H Season 3 Episode 14 (S03E14) - 7
Oh, sir, there's a Colonel Andropolis to see you.
Recap of M*A*S*H Season 3 Episode 14 (S03E14) - 8
Recap of M*A*S*H Season 3 Episode 14 (S03E14) - 9
Oh, ah. [Chuckles]
Recap of M*A*S*H Season 3 Episode 14 (S03E14) - 10
Recap of M*A*S*H Season 3 Episode 14 (S03E14) - 11
Uh, grape leaves, lamb, moussaka.
Recap of M*A*S*H Season 3 Episode 14 (S03E14) - 12
A word about today's lunch: Don't.
Recap of M*A*S*H Season 3 Episode 14 (S03E14) - 13
For anyone to shoot him that close, they'd have to both be inside the same uniform.
Recap of M*A*S*H Season 3 Episode 14 (S03E14) - 14
Recap of M*A*S*H Season 3 Episode 14 (S03E14) - 15
Recap of M*A*S*H Season 3 Episode 14 (S03E14) - 16
Okay.
Recap of M*A*S*H Season 3 Episode 14 (S03E14) - 17
Oh, no, not again.
Recap of M*A*S*H Season 3 Episode 14 (S03E14) - 18
Okay, stop. Stop!
Recap of M*A*S*H Season 3 Episode 14 (S03E14) - 19
[Reciting Serial Number In Greek]
Recap of M*A*S*H Season 3 Episode 14 (S03E14) - 20
Recap of M*A*S*H Season 3 Episode 14 (S03E14) - 21
If you'd studied at all, Radar, you'd know that the Greeks invented the Edible complex.
Recap of M*A*S*H Season 3 Episode 14 (S03E14) - 22
- Aren't you gonna stop him? - Not until the skin is roasted a crispy brown...
Recap of M*A*S*H Season 3 Episode 14 (S03E14) - 23
Recap of M*A*S*H Season 3 Episode 14 (S03E14) - 24
because you asked for it.
Recap of M*A*S*H Season 3 Episode 14 (S03E14) - 25
Well, I'm certainly glad Major Houlihan's in Tokyo and not here to witness this.
Recap of M*A*S*H Season 3 Episode 14 (S03E14) - 26
You leave me no choice but to register a formal complaint with Father Mulcahy...
Recap of M*A*S*H Season 3 Episode 14 (S03E14) - 27
I'm your friend. Come here.
Recap of M*A*S*H Season 3 Episode 14 (S03E14) - 28
Now, listen. Now, you gotta trust me.
Recap of M*A*S*H Season 3 Episode 14 (S03E14) - 29
I gotta inject the, uh, rear of your behind.
Recap of M*A*S*H Season 3 Episode 14 (S03E14) - 30
Recap of M*A*S*H Season 3 Episode 14 (S03E14) - 31
Recap of M*A*S*H Season 3 Episode 14 (S03E14) - 32
Why, you little scum, you.
Recap of M*A*S*H Season 3 Episode 14 (S03E14) - 33
Let's have your name and serial number.
Recap of M*A*S*H Season 3 Episode 14 (S03E14) - 34
Uh, right, right. Okay. Thanks again, Colonel.
Recap of M*A*S*H Season 3 Episode 14 (S03E14) - 35
Uh, well, one paper was to complain that we haven't received...
Recap of M*A*S*H Season 3 Episode 14 (S03E14) - 36
Recap of M*A*S*H Season 3 Episode 14 (S03E14) - 37
Recap of M*A*S*H Season 3 Episode 14 (S03E14) - 38
- But he is out. - Can we help? Just fill this in.
Recap of M*A*S*H Season 3 Episode 14 (S03E14) - 39
Well, you are just as much to blame.
Recap of M*A*S*H Season 3 Episode 14 (S03E14) - 40
He told me. Chapman.
Recap of M*A*S*H Season 3 Episode 14 (S03E14) - 41
- And you tripped him. - Hold it. So?
Recap of M*A*S*H Season 3 Episode 14 (S03E14) - 42
- Probably get ten years. - Maybe 20.
Recap of M*A*S*H Season 3 Episode 14 (S03E14) - 43
One of these days. Boy!
Recap of M*A*S*H Season 3 Episode 14 (S03E14) - 44
Recap of M*A*S*H Season 3 Episode 14 (S03E14) - 45
- and now the damn lamb's flown the coop. - Now, that's a pretty neat trick.
Recap of M*A*S*H Season 3 Episode 14 (S03E14) - 46
Well, I don't want you to get in trouble, sir, but, uh, it's been set free.
Recap of M*A*S*H Season 3 Episode 14 (S03E14) - 47
I didn't want to see him killed, sir.
Recap of M*A*S*H Season 3 Episode 14 (S03E14) - 48
I may be losing my mind.
Recap of M*A*S*H Season 3 Episode 14 (S03E14) - 49
Recap of M*A*S*H Season 3 Episode 14 (S03E14) - 50

Or scroll and see one by one:

Recap of M*A*S*H Season 3 Episode 14 (S03E14) - 2
to Plato, Plutarch, Aristotle, Socrates.
#2
Recap of M*A*S*H Season 3 Episode 14 (S03E14) - 3
handed down concepts that are in use today.
#3
Recap of M*A*S*H Season 3 Episode 14 (S03E14) - 4
Of course, they didn't make temple calls.
#4
Recap of M*A*S*H Season 3 Episode 14 (S03E14) - 5
- I've seen worse. - Will it have to come off?
#5
Recap of M*A*S*H Season 3 Episode 14 (S03E14) - 6
I guess it's the same as cows lying down on all fours just before it rains.
#6
Recap of M*A*S*H Season 3 Episode 14 (S03E14) - 7
Oh, sir, there's a Colonel Andropolis to see you.
#7
Recap of M*A*S*H Season 3 Episode 14 (S03E14) - 8 #8 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 3 Episode 14 (S03E14) - 9
Oh, ah. [Chuckles]
#9
Recap of M*A*S*H Season 3 Episode 14 (S03E14) - 10 #10 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 3 Episode 14 (S03E14) - 11
Uh, grape leaves, lamb, moussaka.
#11
Recap of M*A*S*H Season 3 Episode 14 (S03E14) - 12
A word about today's lunch: Don't.
#12
Recap of M*A*S*H Season 3 Episode 14 (S03E14) - 13
For anyone to shoot him that close, they'd have to both be inside the same uniform.
#13
Recap of M*A*S*H Season 3 Episode 14 (S03E14) - 14 #14 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 3 Episode 14 (S03E14) - 15 #15 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 3 Episode 14 (S03E14) - 16
Okay.
#16
Recap of M*A*S*H Season 3 Episode 14 (S03E14) - 17
Oh, no, not again.
#17
Recap of M*A*S*H Season 3 Episode 14 (S03E14) - 18
Okay, stop. Stop!
#18
Recap of M*A*S*H Season 3 Episode 14 (S03E14) - 19
[Reciting Serial Number In Greek]
#19
Recap of M*A*S*H Season 3 Episode 14 (S03E14) - 20 #20 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 3 Episode 14 (S03E14) - 21
If you'd studied at all, Radar, you'd know that the Greeks invented the Edible complex.
#21
Recap of M*A*S*H Season 3 Episode 14 (S03E14) - 22
- Aren't you gonna stop him? - Not until the skin is roasted a crispy brown...
#22
Recap of M*A*S*H Season 3 Episode 14 (S03E14) - 23 #23 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 3 Episode 14 (S03E14) - 24
because you asked for it.
#24
Recap of M*A*S*H Season 3 Episode 14 (S03E14) - 25
Well, I'm certainly glad Major Houlihan's in Tokyo and not here to witness this.
#25
Recap of M*A*S*H Season 3 Episode 14 (S03E14) - 26
You leave me no choice but to register a formal complaint with Father Mulcahy...
#26
Recap of M*A*S*H Season 3 Episode 14 (S03E14) - 27
I'm your friend. Come here.
#27
Recap of M*A*S*H Season 3 Episode 14 (S03E14) - 28
Now, listen. Now, you gotta trust me.
#28
Recap of M*A*S*H Season 3 Episode 14 (S03E14) - 29
I gotta inject the, uh, rear of your behind.
#29
Recap of M*A*S*H Season 3 Episode 14 (S03E14) - 30 #30 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 3 Episode 14 (S03E14) - 31 #31 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 3 Episode 14 (S03E14) - 32
Why, you little scum, you.
#32
Recap of M*A*S*H Season 3 Episode 14 (S03E14) - 33
Let's have your name and serial number.
#33
Recap of M*A*S*H Season 3 Episode 14 (S03E14) - 34
Uh, right, right. Okay. Thanks again, Colonel.
#34
Recap of M*A*S*H Season 3 Episode 14 (S03E14) - 35
Uh, well, one paper was to complain that we haven't received...
#35
Recap of M*A*S*H Season 3 Episode 14 (S03E14) - 36 #36 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 3 Episode 14 (S03E14) - 37 #37 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 3 Episode 14 (S03E14) - 38
- But he is out. - Can we help? Just fill this in.
#38
Recap of M*A*S*H Season 3 Episode 14 (S03E14) - 39
Well, you are just as much to blame.
#39
Recap of M*A*S*H Season 3 Episode 14 (S03E14) - 40
He told me. Chapman.
#40
Recap of M*A*S*H Season 3 Episode 14 (S03E14) - 41
- And you tripped him. - Hold it. So?
#41
Recap of M*A*S*H Season 3 Episode 14 (S03E14) - 42
- Probably get ten years. - Maybe 20.
#42
Recap of M*A*S*H Season 3 Episode 14 (S03E14) - 43
One of these days. Boy!
#43
Recap of M*A*S*H Season 3 Episode 14 (S03E14) - 44 #44 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 3 Episode 14 (S03E14) - 45
- and now the damn lamb's flown the coop. - Now, that's a pretty neat trick.
#45
Recap of M*A*S*H Season 3 Episode 14 (S03E14) - 46
Well, I don't want you to get in trouble, sir, but, uh, it's been set free.
#46
Recap of M*A*S*H Season 3 Episode 14 (S03E14) - 47
I didn't want to see him killed, sir.
#47
Recap of M*A*S*H Season 3 Episode 14 (S03E14) - 48
I may be losing my mind.
#48
Recap of M*A*S*H Season 3 Episode 14 (S03E14) - 49 #49 Recap of M*A*S*H Season 3 Episode 14 (S03E14) - 50 #50