Man Seeking Woman

Josh finds a new girlfriend who's great for him.

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than a man in a committed relationship.

#2

Back off! Back! (hissing)

#3

JOSH: Wait, uh...

#4

You guys need to take your-your space bras

#5

(whispers): Oh, God.

#6

Well, then I look them in the eyes and I said...

#7

- Oh, I-I got to go. - What? I thought

#8

- Don't lie to me! - Okay, work-work clothes

#9

- My plant's broke. - Aw, he'll be okay.

#10

Oh, my God, you are so sweet.

#11

Uh...

#12

you continue to make the kinds of choices you've been making,

#13

I-I don't have time for this.

#14

Let's go. Now. Out.

#15

would be pretty good with quinoa.

#16

I'm 39 years old, and I'm serving a life sentence

#17

she caught me smoking a cigarette right there

#18

I got my Lululemons pulled up to here!

#19

Yeah.

#20

Oh, 'cause we got eight... eight guys here. I don't know

#21

then all of a sudden she's got almond milk

#22

I-I mean, maybe we can try, like, an open relationship.

#23

and also, what do you think about Portobello mushrooms

#24

Quinoa.

#25

I really need a friend right now.

#26

like I might be coming down with something.

#27

I don't think I can do this anymore."

#28

(thunder rumbling)

#29

- Yeah. Yeah. Is... - Yeah?

#30

(thunder rumbling)

#31

Does a boyfriend not have the right to...

#32

defines a lie thusly, as a falsehood, an untruth.

#33

You canceled because your ex-girlfriend showed up...

#34 #35

(laughs) So creepy. Yeah... yeah. So scary.

#36

- I am completely innocent. - Oh, please. She referenced sex

#37

Webster's Dictionary

#38

Shared a bottle of wine and touched each other's hands?

#39

Uh, but the-the fact remains,

#40

(yawning)

#41

or... we-we, uh...

#42

She was out the door, and you suggested something that would keep her there.

#43

Did we kiss? Maybe not. But, come on, you're on the couch,

#44

- You son of a bitch. Okay. - Trapped.

#45 #46

Thanks, man.

#47

or the dog boy's dog boy dance.

#48

(gavel continues banging)

#49 #50