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SEASON
EPISODE

Season 4

Aired 2 years ago - May 05, 2015

As Coach prepares to move out of the loft, Schmidt also decides to get rid of his non-essentials and in the process discovers what is truly important to him; Jess and Nick reminisce about their “sex mug” and wonder if they still have feelings for each other.

Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 22 (S04E22) - 1
Stop comparing your dogs to my kid.
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so all I have to do is store the rest of the cord you bought.
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The place looks absolutely wonderful, Lorelai. When does it open?
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Kirk's lucky to have found you, Lulu.
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- I got to show you this mincing. Seriously
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Well, maybe the test run will break a couple of them,
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- Oh! So is he coming? Luke's coming? - Is he not supposed to?
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Look at how he chopped these onions.
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Well, your timing is perfect, 'cause I went to the store yesterday.
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You've been here 20 minutes, and you drop this now?
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- What did he want? - He wanted me to come away with him.
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to have this guy show up out of the blue and want to take you away with him.
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- It's part of why he's cute. He's unpredictable. - I guess.
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I was safe, and he was so nice to me.
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Hey, she's a piratey soul, full of vinegar and glitter,
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We're talking Farrah on "Letterman."
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Of course about Luke. Did you notice anything different?
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What's your damage, Heather?
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- Danced? How? - We pop-locked.
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- Oh, stop. - What else happened?
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- That sounds like dating to me. - But maybe he didn't mean it as a date thing.
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- I know. - You can't just date Luke.
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Let's just go back in there and see if anything's weird, okay?
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- Two radish roses for a carrot curl? - Deal.
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- If it isn't rabbit, then what is it? - It's duck.
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Oh, well, Grandma, I don't really know what I'm doing this summer yet,
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That's right, Rory's mother was just marveling at the "hey, look over here" approach to the invitation.
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- Twenty years. - Twenty years, wow.
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Fantastic. Isn't that great, Rory?
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So, inviting them to stay in the inn is going to do what?
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Where are you going? Hey!
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- It's very cold but great for racquetball. - Kirk, what do you want?
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Anyhow, I'm a little concerned about this invitation, because...
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- Night terrors? - Basically, I freak out at beddy-bye.
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so I jumped out of bed and locked my pillow in the bathroom.
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on top of the roof completely naked or running down the street completely naked
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I called the Dragonfly and had them put me and Lulu in the room right next to yours.
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- Hey, Luke? - What, Kirk?
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and every single person I hired is fantastic. We're doomed.
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Tom, I'm loving you like a two dollar whore.
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- Oh, will you look at this place! - It's a paradise.
Aired 2 years ago - Apr 28, 2015

Schmidt takes the fall to help Fawn out of a political scandal. Meanwhile, Jess declares herself a “love doctor” and Coach faces a life-changing decision with May.

Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 21 (S04E21) - 1
You should see all the boisterous high-fiving going on all around me. It's sad.
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I was just wondering if you want me to tell you when I do.
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Sure.
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Don't do that! Don't do anything out of the ordinary.
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Jack LaLanne. I just googled him. Hi, Cletus.
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- This is my boyfriend, Chester Fleet. - Oh, hi, Chester. I've heard a lot about you.
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- Tastes gross, but does the trick. - I stashed one in the fridge for you.
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I hate that our little clique is breaking up. It's so the end of something.
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There's Janet with her boyfriend and Lana with hers.
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Oh, here's a bunch of couples from Valentine's Day. You're not in that one.
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- Are people talking? - Not that I've heard. You just don't get out enough.
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They're embarrassment-proof. Here.
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Please stop talking about my love life.
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Well, do you still have the big door knockers -- metal with the chipped red paint?
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It's a double entendre. I've been in this country 20 years. I get things.
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She's your only child. I know you miss her. She misses you.
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And it's not just guys -- girls are not supposed to be monogamous, either.
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Make that one, and the one thing they're not that good at.
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that going into that bar violated his parole. You can't reason with him.
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- Girls, this is Jess. - Hello, handsome.
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- Have fun with what? - This package is for Liz Danes.
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I don't believe this, you rats!
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Ladies Speed Stick -- $2.60. Good choice on that one.
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I'm so sorry you have a final tomorrow. I thought you'd be free as a bird tonight.
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- We just thought we'd try something new tonight. - We?
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Well, my roommates are all gone, and I'd say 95% of the class has vamoosed.
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Funny, you didn't mention that to me when we talked earlier. You just said he wouldn't be here.
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- So you'll be a free girl around noon? - Around then.
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- What is going on here? - I'm trying to get her to fess up to the separation.
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Well, stop attacking her so she'll stop attacking me.
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They're having some sort of marital difficulty, Mom,
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 21 (S04E21) - 36
Well, good, good. Gotta have that soufflé.
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Someone in this room called someone in Groton at 11:37 P.M. on the 16th, and it wasn't me.
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- Aunt Jun. - I'm here on your mother's behalf.
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- Would you like to come in? - No.
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No, I was just packing and having a little lemonade here.
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- Would you like to? - Sure.
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- Chemistry. - Philosophy.
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- And he thought you might like to go. - Yeah.
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Bye, grandma.
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 21 (S04E21) - 45
And lesson number two -- never, ever let anybody outside of your family see you in diapers.
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 21 (S04E21) - 46
So, the plans for tonight -- they're pretty casual.
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Ignore that.
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- Shoe polish goes bad? - It's all chunky.
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They lend support everywhere you need it, but they breathe.
Aired 2 years ago - Apr 07, 2015

Fawn takes Jess to a charity golf tournament, but the Vice Principal lands in the sand trap in her attempts to make a good impression. Meanwhile, Winston meets a beautiful woman and must lie about being a cop.

Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 20 (S04E20) - 1
Sookie, too much salt in gazpacho.
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- What are you doing? - I need coffee.
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It keeps running and thinking and making lists.
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If I could move, I would hug you. In fact, in my mind, I am hugging you,
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Do what? Go broke?
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Oh, hey. I want you to take a tour of the inn.
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Fine, I'll eat it. But I'm making a face the entire time.
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I wanted to get that table.
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a little control in a world where very little is controllable.
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Yes, that's my voice. I left myself a couple of messages last night.
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 20 (S04E20) - 11
I don't find the whole conducting-business-on-the-floor thing amusing anymore!
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- I'm not gonna kibitz. - Okay. And stop touching my banister.
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- Hi, Luke. - Hey, Sookie.
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He sells only free-range, hormone-free, and he's recently divorced.
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and you guys just talk till I get back.
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- Yeah, you too. - Luke is my... special friend.
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Well, it was nice meeting you both. I'm just gonna go say goodbye to Sookie.
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I don't know. Maybe.
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 20 (S04E20) - 21
- You're making me long for Shel. - You'd never want for chicken.
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- That's one way of looking at it, yes. - You can't do that.
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 20 (S04E20) - 23
and I don't quite have a full load of whites, so if you have some whites, toss them in.
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Asher asked me to go to Oxford with him this summer.
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You were gonna ask him after class, but Toby from "American Splendor" wouldn't stop yapping and you couldn't.
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I'll just tell you the prices. This one is $24.99.
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I don't know what you're doing. I just need to scan the books.
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It's going to take work. It's going to take introspection.
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 20 (S04E20) - 31
That is the key. If you crave love, then you deserve love.
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I just haven't been hit in the head with the Oprah stick lately.
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The zucchini have got to be there.
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We need money! God! You know that, Lindsay!
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Don't you care about that? I want to go out with my husband. Hello! We're married here!
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 20 (S04E20) - 38
Complete the following sentence -- I feel angry because...
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 20 (S04E20) - 39
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T.J. asked me, I said yes, we made a few phone calls,
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 20 (S04E20) - 42
You'd be like 800th on the list.
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He's got a nose for these things.
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Seriously, I love myself in this dress.
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We got the Scotch-egg guy to cater it and T.J.'s gonna write the vows.
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- He's young, he's busy. - Busy doing what?
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 20 (S04E20) - 47
You got any of that terrible peach pie you make? I'm starving.
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Poor Grandma. We should talk to them.
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 20 (S04E20) - 50
I stopped watching it and I saved it for when we could watch it together,
Aired 2 years ago - Mar 31, 2015

Jess crashes a funeral, hoping to delete a “sext” she recently sent to the deceased. Then, Schmidt’s mom, Louise, arrives in town for a visit to demand he write thank-you notes for his bar mitzvah gifts, and Winston is desperate to be off-duty friends with his police partner, Aly.

Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 19 (S04E19) - 1
- Hey, do you have any Lucille Balls left? - Yes, I have some Balls.
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 19 (S04E19) - 2
- And the miniskirts... - And the groovy, psychedelic music...
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It's okay. I have another one.
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 19 (S04E19) - 9
- Hello? - Who is this?
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 19 (S04E19) - 10
Okay -- ooh, hold on, hon.
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- Hey, who's that? - It's Jason.
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 19 (S04E19) - 12
I left a message for Dad. I talked to Mom, but she just had her morning Mr. Happy pill,
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- Call me later. - Me?
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Oh, you know, the first boys off the boat were mowed down,
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We were going to tell them when the time was right.
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I just couldn't find the right hook. It didn't feel focused enough.
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to add a little Matchbox Twenty to our sound, don't you?
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and she's staying with my parents, and that means she's going to bring my cousin, Turner.
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- 'Cause you're the most reliable. - How very rock 'n' roll.
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It's just a prototype. The real one won't have the sandwich on it.
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That's the meatball explosion.
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so maybe we can get back to work. Okay?
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that the owner, Mrs. Tinley, took pity on and nursed back to health.
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I think I know that little guy -- he was here for breakfast this morning.
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Okay, let's see -- they saw the deer, we released the doves,
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Why, I bet our amazing chef, Sookie St. James,
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- Oh, Sookie... - What about the cookies?
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finally, I went to the office, and he wasn't there.
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What? Jason...
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I...couldn't believe it.
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How could he do this? How could my father just take the business from you?
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and he's sitting pretty. Makes perfect sense.
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- Come in. - No, no. I can't. I'll call you later.
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like a map of a country I had once traveled with him.
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It is an absolutely electric book.
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He is so commanding. I mean, it's obviously not necessary for a brilliant novelist
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We won't be disturbing him. I'm his girlfriend.
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Hey, did I show you this? Look.
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And as long as I know that the wise, willful, wonderful woman is me,
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- including four of my reporters. - I'm not here on paper business.
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Last year it was Trey Myers. God, was she beautiful.
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My money's on the redhead.
Aired 2 years ago - Mar 03, 2015

After a night of partying at Bearclaw's, Jess and Cece make their way back to the loft and run into a familiar face. Meanwhile, Coach worries about bringing Nick and Winston around his sophisticated new girlfriend, May.

Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 18 (S04E18) - 1
Thank you, Kirk. I'm going to have to mobilize the community.
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- Your minute's up. Order. - We're not ready.
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- I need to practice more. - You'll get it there.
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Anywhere else you want to try it --
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I know, we ordered it before we hired you. We should have waited.
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- It's not me. It really is heavy. - You mean here?
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It's nothing funny. It is how you stand in these pants.
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The pretty little things just like the bookcase lifters.
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- It's three pieces of wood. - Well, I hate it -- hate it, hate it, hate it!
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- Are we still talking about anvils? - Yes, where did all the anvils go?
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He was always trying to drop an anvil on the Road Runner's head
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I know she sounds nuts, but it's a very common cartoon.
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Where are all the anvils?
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I don't hear anyone chiming in with rational theories.
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- It's a dog-eat-dog world, Grandpa. - Don't get the wrong idea.
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Is there gonna be a sad little going-away party where he brings in his own cake
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I'll have to bring my English-to-dumbbell dictionary.
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And forty-seven cents comes to $5. Thank you, Mrs. Cassini.
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Tracy, change out the scoop water. It's an unsightly color.
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Kirk, I just had a spat with my sourball distributor, and I'm not in the mood.
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and the kids had a blast hunting them down, except the Banyan boys.
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- Eggs smell when they decompose. - I just found that out.
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Oh, Richard, if I get that far on four shots,
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Oh, do give Trish our best. Emily and I were just talking about her -- terrific girl.
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And, Bob, didn't know you were a duffer.
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You couldn't drag those two apart at a function.
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That's a big "if," but that could happen.
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He wants to have dinner.
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Did he bring up Carol before or after he brought up the dinner?
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There'll be seven of us. That's an unbalanced table, but that's okay. Oh, this is wonderful!
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I have two papers due, so I'll be in Stars Hollow avoiding the fray.
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- Small. - Yes.
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- and this job with Tom has been perfect. - Extra money for what?
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 18 (S04E18) - 40
- It's just temporary. - Maybe.
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 18 (S04E18) - 41
- Can't the townhouse wait? - Jeez, lighten up.
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 18 (S04E18) - 42
You don't need to tell me again, okay?
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 18 (S04E18) - 43
Attention, please! Everybody, if I may!
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 18 (S04E18) - 44
made each year to avoid catastrophes such as this?
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 18 (S04E18) - 45
but as my way of thanking you, help yourself to lunch at Doose's market,
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 18 (S04E18) - 46
at this fine group of volunteers, my heart races with pride.
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 18 (S04E18) - 47
Well, that's swell.
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 18 (S04E18) - 48
It's infantile and a total clam.
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 18 (S04E18) - 49
and then thirty-five... and then forty... and then forty-five
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 18 (S04E18) - 50
Aired 2 years ago - Feb 24, 2015

It’s a lockdown in the loft when Schmidt’s arachnophobia forces the group go on a spider hunt. In the midst of this chaos, Winston inadvertently makes Jess think that Cece is in love with Nick.

Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 17 (S04E17) - 1
He wants me to live a long time and be healthy. That is romantic.
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I know, it's so exciting.
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 17 (S04E17) - 3
No problem, Glenn.
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 17 (S04E17) - 4
that he got turned down by that German cannibal?
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 17 (S04E17) - 5
Okay, but if you change your mind...
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 17 (S04E17) - 6
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 17 (S04E17) - 7
Coffee for now. Is everything okay?
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 17 (S04E17) - 8
- Nobody uses that stuff. - Oh, sure they do.
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 17 (S04E17) - 9
That is what investors do.
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 17 (S04E17) - 10
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 17 (S04E17) - 11
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 17 (S04E17) - 12
These are white with a gold stripe and some sort of fruity padding in the toe.
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 17 (S04E17) - 13
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 17 (S04E17) - 14
- I'm freezing. - Me too.
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 17 (S04E17) - 15
How was I supposed to know you were gonna jump out of your seat like a maniac?
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 17 (S04E17) - 16
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 17 (S04E17) - 17
Paris, you took up the whole thing with your "Hey, Gore,
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 17 (S04E17) - 18
It's supposed to be spring. Why is it still cold?
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 17 (S04E17) - 19
It's warm in Florida.
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that the thought of spending a week with a bunch of drunken bimbos
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Glenn's a very responsible guy. I'm sure it will be fine.
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 17 (S04E17) - 23
and I feel as if I have veto power, we're good.
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 17 (S04E17) - 24
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at Grandville Middle School.
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 17 (S04E17) - 28
If I die in a car crash, it's going to be at my own hand.
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 17 (S04E17) - 29
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Hey, I shaved three hours off the MapQuest estimate.
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Room 6, okay. And what is your name?
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 17 (S04E17) - 32
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 17 (S04E17) - 33
and it keeps them from going through your stuff and robbing you blind.
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 17 (S04E17) - 34
Okay... not bad.
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 17 (S04E17) - 35
Yes, and then we need to up your dosage.
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 17 (S04E17) - 36
And I was worried I would I feel stupid.
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 17 (S04E17) - 37
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 17 (S04E17) - 38
I was being polite.
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 17 (S04E17) - 39
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You had an entire day before I woke up.
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- Yeah, here. - Perfect.
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 17 (S04E17) - 42
Hey, Lorelai, hold on a second.
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 17 (S04E17) - 43
Or if you were carrying something,
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Here- it's over here.
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 17 (S04E17) - 46
Thanks, Glenn.
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 17 (S04E17) - 47
There's so many towels, there's basically no room for us.
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 17 (S04E17) - 48
Now, we're going to need a fruit plate in about an hour
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 17 (S04E17) - 49
And constant shoulder tension creates a hunchback.
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 17 (S04E17) - 50
I'm so excited to see you guys.
Aired 2 years ago - Feb 17, 2015

Jess takes a bumpy stroll down memory lane when she and the gang travel to her childhood home in Portland, Oregon, for her father's wedding.

Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 16 (S04E16) - 1
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- This doesn't smell right. - Smells fine, Kirk.
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I want him to make that breakfast quesadilla thing he made yesterday.
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 16 (S04E16) - 4
It's so we can have quiet time and keep the conversation going at the same time.
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 16 (S04E16) - 5
He just got up and said, "Feel your taters."
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- It's not plagiarism. - Hey!
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 16 (S04E16) - 7
Those are phrases used to talk about a small band of followers or,
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 16 (S04E16) - 8
I get that, but I don't think my "rain-soaked highway" looks shady.
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 16 (S04E16) - 9
This is the breeding ground for the next Jayson Blair!
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 16 (S04E16) - 10
Welcome to the dollhouse.
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 16 (S04E16) - 11
Charlie's Angels: Full Throttle 24 hours a day."
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It sounds like they're turning them.
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 16 (S04E16) - 13
But we just saw her.
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 16 (S04E16) - 14
Apparently something his mother used to have made for him
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- You could Google it. - Can I? Can I Google it?
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Nothing. If you can find the soup, that'll be enough.
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 16 (S04E16) - 17
No problem. One huge vat of mock turtle soup coming up.
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 16 (S04E16) - 18
I think I'll take that hug now.
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Well, isn't there any forwarding information?
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Hey, dad.
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Music was a little frivolous for her.
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was as strong as that woman.
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- regret. - What regret?
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 16 (S04E16) - 26
and hateful words.
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 16 (S04E16) - 27
And I spoke her as if I owed her nothing,
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 16 (S04E16) - 28
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and you really should eat something, Dad.
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 16 (S04E16) - 30
Oh, well, before he died, did Mr. Martelli pass his trade
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 16 (S04E16) - 31
I will speak slowly. Thank you.
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 16 (S04E16) - 32
I'm going to call the florist's idiot stepson.
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"Lorelai Gilmore died this week at age 86.
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 16 (S04E16) - 34
And not a word about the new maternity wing that she donated to St. Joseph's!
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 16 (S04E16) - 35
Don't worry, Dad.
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 16 (S04E16) - 36
Goodbye. Thank Sookie for me.
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 16 (S04E16) - 37
Lorelai, I have to go to Gran's house tomorrow to sort through her personal papers.
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 16 (S04E16) - 38
the fact that raisins make me gag became totally irrelevant.
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Shouldn't I be crying? I feel like I should be crying.
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Yes. You don't think I can work within the system,
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 16 (S04E16) - 44
- My keys are in the foyer. - All right.
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 16 (S04E16) - 45
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then is to be cremated and have her ashes divided in two --
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 16 (S04E16) - 47
From now on, it's going to be a 3-person household --
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 16 (S04E16) - 48
It was not at all uncommon for prominent families to keep the bloodlines closed.
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 16 (S04E16) - 49
I'm sorry, but I don't understand how everyone was so okay with this.
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 16 (S04E16) - 50
but I cannot stand by and let you make a terrible mistake.
Aired 2 years ago - Feb 10, 2015

When a new bar opens in the neighborhood, it completes the final piece of the puzzle for Nick's epic Valentine's Day pub crawl. Meanwhile, Jess and Ryan drunkenly contemplate their future, Coach meets a new woman - over and over again - and Schmidt tries to fit into the world of politics.

Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 15 (S04E15) - 1
Every day Rory and I write each other multiple times. It's great.
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 15 (S04E15) - 2
and his pipe and his fancy feathered pen, writing
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 15 (S04E15) - 3
Or you could just eat here and save e-mailing for when you're...
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 15 (S04E15) - 4
Well, it's coming out five. Buster is at home, asleep.
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 15 (S04E15) - 5
- It makes it easier to limbo under. - This is my place. I shouldn't have to limbo.
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As opposed to dematerializing, passing vapor-like through the wall,
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I have my own room, and they're gonna sleep in the living room.
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 15 (S04E15) - 13
- Frame it or something. - I will. I've gotta go, I'll call you later.
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 15 (S04E15) - 14
- Well, I only fell once. - And gracefully. Bye.
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I blubbered an amount to you, and we didn't get to talk about a repayment schedule.
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I don't want to read that.
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 15 (S04E15) - 18
- I need to know her role. - There is none.
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- We'll dot the Is and cross the Ts another day. - Yes, we'll cross and dot.
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Someone to take pity on the loinless.
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 15 (S04E15) - 23
You've done enough shopping for a lifetime. For Methuselah's lifetime.
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 15 (S04E15) - 24
I should hang up and let you both starve.
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 15 (S04E15) - 25
I think we have a shot at Bastide.
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 15 (S04E15) - 26
We're going to Bastide, but don't fret.
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 15 (S04E15) - 27
All right.
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 15 (S04E15) - 28
Yes. Yes, we'll be there. Thank you. Wait! They said they can take us
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 15 (S04E15) - 29
No, she's been sick all week. I told her to stay in her dorm and rest.
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 15 (S04E15) - 30
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in the "love is..." cartoons, has degenerated into e-mail correspondence.
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 15 (S04E15) - 32
but you did share these gems: "Hey, what up? Is it freezing there, too? Ice."
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 15 (S04E15) - 33
You're not even using verbs. That's not a relationship. Relationships need verbs.
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 15 (S04E15) - 34
- So, where'd they land? - John and Keith are dead.
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- Cool! What do we do? - I don't know.
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- That could be fun. - It'll be like we're in an old movie, y'know?
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- Tomorrow at 10:00, Roz darling? - Till tomorrow, Ava dearest.
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- What are you looking for? - Shh. Come on.
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 15 (S04E15) - 39
- You ever the one that gets cut loose? - I've gone twice. Shh. Snuggles.
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 15 (S04E15) - 40
- I'll have a beer tonight. - Beer? Oh, no!
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 15 (S04E15) - 41
- That makes it sound better than it is. - Kinda the point.
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- I'm kidding. I'm a kidder. - What are you doing here?
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 15 (S04E15) - 43
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I think I must have been a carpenter in another life,
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 15 (S04E15) - 45
- I'm really into the environment. - Oh, me too.
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 15 (S04E15) - 46
Lindsay's mom is teaching her how to cook.
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Oh, well, it's a hot lunch every day. Plus they always bring something for the group.
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 15 (S04E15) - 49
Just anybody holding free food.
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 15 (S04E15) - 50
There's always a bouncy xylophone playing when movie girls window-shop.
Aired 2 years ago - Feb 03, 2015

Jess helps Schmidt and Nick pitch their new business venture - the "Swuit," a suit made entirely of sweatshirt material - to entrepreneur Lori Greiner. Meanwhile, Winston and Coach decide they will invest in Cece's future.

Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 14 (S04E14) - 1
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And then the owner dragged him away by the back legs.
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I love the hot tip of my soldering iron as it liquefies metal and singes the wires...
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Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 14 (S04E14) - 7
You mean that unsightly girth is nature given?
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 14 (S04E14) - 8
- and get confused all over again. - Bitter little woman.
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 14 (S04E14) - 9
Yeah, why don't you go sit all alone in your room
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 14 (S04E14) - 10
I'm gonna grab Barbie's neck and squeeze until her expandable hair falls out
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 14 (S04E14) - 11
He smells. That fat tub of hers smells.
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 14 (S04E14) - 12
You know, maybe it's not Janet's boyfriend I can't be around.
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Wait, I'm here. Wait.
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It's certainly as big a moment as, oh, your first baby step and your first fall on your face,
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 14 (S04E14) - 16
Everyone is going to be sorry one day -- everyone.
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- Bad time? - No.
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He's offered me a job working on his crew. It's good pay. It's flexible hours.
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 14 (S04E14) - 19
Good, I just didn't know where we stood after my wedding and all.
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Part time, but everything's good. I've got a five-year plan.
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 14 (S04E14) - 21
Lindsay and her mom got a good deal on a family plan, so I signed up.
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 14 (S04E14) - 22
Something to look forward to.
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Eight weeks ago, ten weeks ago?
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- Can you just please keep reading? - Over 200 shades of white? I did not know that.
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 14 (S04E14) - 25
and you're over there arguing about William Safire.
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You, me, your father, and apparently she wants to meet Jason.
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If your hair looks a mess, it will be my fault, and I don't need that responsibility right now.
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 14 (S04E14) - 29
Yes, she can. She can hear sin and depravity and all sorts of lustful things.
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Hey! They put pipes in the kitchen. We're almost able to run water!
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Look, it won't take long. It's an easy cut. I'm very low maintenance.
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 14 (S04E14) - 32
Yeah, I thought maybe Rory would have told you.
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 14 (S04E14) - 33
Yeah, they're terrific pipes, and you got that fancy sink coming in tomorrow morning.
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 14 (S04E14) - 34
I gotta deal with a lot of jerks in my business, yelling at you when it's not your fault,
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- Oh, this is hard. - Are we not paying him?
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 14 (S04E14) - 36
Okay. Let me talk to Tom for a second, hon. We'll clear it up, really. Go, go.
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The thing is, if I don't get paid, I can't pay my guys, then they tend to stop showing up.
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 14 (S04E14) - 38
Hey. I should have talked to you sooner.
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If by fantastic, you mean are we as close as that one-armed surfer girl and the shark, then yes.
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 14 (S04E14) - 41
More embarrassing than Tom almost crying because we're not paying him?
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 14 (S04E14) - 42
- What's your problem? - I'll tell you my problem, Andre.
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 14 (S04E14) - 43
So every friend I bring here has to pass your anal standards?
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You told. Come here.
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 14 (S04E14) - 47
That's blabbing.
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and everyone else passing through there. She's gotta go.
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 14 (S04E14) - 49
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Yeah, I know, she said some stupid things.
Aired 2 years ago - Jan 13, 2015

Jess struggles not to show favoritism to Ryan, now that they are officially a couple, which leads to a disastrous class field trip. Meanwhile, Schmidt gets an ulcer and Winston becomes obsessed with wearing a crystal.

Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 13 (S04E13) - 1
Hey, did anyone ever think that maybe Sylvia Plath wasn't crazy,
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I repeat: we need more stars in the gazebo area.
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 13 (S04E13) - 7
If he says roger, what the hell am I supposed to say?
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 13 (S04E13) - 8
The Budweiser Clydesdales prancing along, Ann Jillian waving in the back.
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I find it ridiculous that Gypsy won't walk twenty feet to take a look at my car.
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 13 (S04E13) - 10
You're making a spectacle of yourself.
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 13 (S04E13) - 11
Just tell me what's wrong with the car.
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 13 (S04E13) - 12
And bring a lot of money because I'm going to overcharge you
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Come over here and help us.
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Maybe if we add a layer of tinfoil.
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Yes, it is.
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and we still haven't filled our table. I'm four people short.
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Once you do not fill your table, you do not get another table to fill.
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 13 (S04E13) - 20
All right, the Dartmores are trying to change Bitty's viewing.
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Oh, hey, Luke. You remember my friend Carrie, right?
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- No. - Why?
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 13 (S04E13) - 24
Liz, do you remember when you decided to make those ceramic pots?
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 13 (S04E13) - 25
Look around. Everybody here has a life.
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I can check.
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They're gonna make people's ears green and send them to the hospital.
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Hi, I'd like a large coffee and a cherry Danish, please.
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- A little farther back. Roger. - What?
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Then it's your own fault! Roger!
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I borrowed the truck.
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tell him Lorelai wanted to gently remind him about the window.
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Oh, sorry. You look like his type, so
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- He did not say that. - I think he did.
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He's pretty amazing though. No matter how much I screw up,
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- And the little white toga dresses. - I sound silly.
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I've discussed it with my boyfriend. I'm not sure how Luke would like it, but I sure would.
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 13 (S04E13) - 39
I have to tell you this is a real treat having you two girls over,
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 13 (S04E13) - 40
Ah, we don't deserve such treatment.
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Stupid little pisher, trying to sneak out of town without anyone knowing.
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- Jess? - Yes.
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He's the one who didn't call and now he just gets up and walks out like he's mad.
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I'm making dinner upstairs and you don't have anything.
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I'll buy a pie tomorrow. Tonight I'm making a feast for my guys.
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Hey, that is my singing "Be Happy" Bass
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- Thomas Jefferson? - No. Thomas Jefferson?
Aired 2 years ago - Jan 06, 2015

After Winston graduates from the Police Academy, Nick and Coach worry when they see his new training officer. Meanwhile, Jess uses Schmidt to try and influence a councilwoman to stop the night construction taking place outside the loft.

Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 12 (S04E12) - 1
Or maybe she's a friend of Nicole's or another attorney if it's not definitely off.
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So what do you think? An early morning tryst with the county dominatrix?
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Oh, maybe later, I don't think now is such a good time.
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Wow! I'm stunning.
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I am hoping that one boy notices. Chester Fleet.
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Thanks Lane. See ya later.
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Hey, I was just stepping out the door, what's up?
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Well, I'm - dead tired, I have tons of studying to do
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- Oh, sure. - And I'm seeing him tomorrow anyway.
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for on-site accidents at any of your plants.
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Kinky? I'm sorry, what is kinky?
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- For... - ... finding dead people.
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- Duke's. - Duke's. Sure.
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No, no Rietgaard, those documents were Fed-Ex'd to you on Wednesday.
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Hey, is he ice-skating under a windmill, that's the picture I have in my head.
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- Are they different people? - Same person.
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No, it's passed. My 5 a.m. coffee just kicked in again.
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The speed limit here is twelve!
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- Anywhere - else - for coffee, please. - Okay.
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Sorry to pounce on you like that.
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and she won't see me.
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Plus, I heard her telling you about my friend, Lane.
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Not that I know of.
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- You forget about me? - No, I'm just real, real busy, that's all.
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He's trippy.
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- What are you doing? - I'm putting it away.
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I do not look fine, I look good. I am good. I am really good, Luke.
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- You're going to your high school reunion? - I even sent in a picture for the program.
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- I dare say, that he might even be the one! - Well, yeah!
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your stuff missing, crying on the phone to me to bail you out,
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Yes. Let's talk about something else. You said you had a new job.
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I wear the long skirt, I have a hat and one of those corsets that squishes my boobs all up high.
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What come on, Liz? I mean, you're selling earrings in a booth
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No, I tried, you gave up.
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Because I think now he'll have to go to school, now he'll have to graduate, now -
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You should talk. You made out with her at the homecoming game.
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Okay, Dennis, it is time to get proactive on this.
Aired 2 years ago - Dec 09, 2014

As the gang prepares to depart for the holidays, they quickly find they may be home alone when they are all trapped at the airport.

Aired 2 years ago - Dec 02, 2014

Schmidt quickly regrets trying to understand the politics of a girl fight when one breaks out between Jess and Cece. Meanwhile, Nick goes on a date with Tran's granddaughter, whom Winston believes is hiding a secret.

Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 10 (S04E10) - 1
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Are you sure it was food every time?
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- And try this pizzelle. - I knew it.
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Hi, and I'm high around this little thing.
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Davey's nanny? Just until something permanent comes along.
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lots of job opportunities for industrious Mormons.
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Oh, I see you're trying the pizzelles.
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Yes. I turned Sookie onto a place that sells hard-to-find kitchenware.
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I think your voice hits a pitch that hurts his ears.
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But the fact is, wherever Sookie goes, the baby goes,
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and says, "Oh, look at all those culs-de-sac."
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Yes, and we have a special surprise for you for dessert.
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Marzipan?
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Marzipan is not candy.
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Don't force yourself.
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Oh, that's a huge help. Terrific.
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Mmm, delicious.
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Have you swallowed your marzipan yet?
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- For what? - Dinner, et cetera.
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Almost done with your radiator, young lady.
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I've been here 23 years come August and I've never been bored.
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Just thought I'd get a jump on things. How was your trip?
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Sure. The resort was beautiful.
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You're just learning that? Why are you here anyway?
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No, no, what did you mean when you said Paris was not with Jamie?
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Apparently, the big game was big for everyone.
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- 45? 46? 47? 47½? 48? - Sixty!
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And it's so annoying. I mean, she's hiding it from me,
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This is not the same as Dean. I did not cheat on Dean with an old guy.
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I just had a feeling the opportunity would present itself eventually.
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Okay! Okay, I'll be right there. Goodbye.
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You took so long! Why? You need to charter an airplane?
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- I offered to babysit. - I'm sorry, you did what?
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and the airplane, and then I even picked it up.
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and then you pull it back and forth and back and forth.
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the screaming would start again.
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See? I made him happy.
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under the bed. Now, Lift up here, and I'll get him out.
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He's just fine. He's just fine.
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And yet here you are wearing your super-low-cut jeans
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The one that came back the very next day.
Aired 2 years ago - Nov 25, 2014

With winter coming and everyone still single, Schmidt initiates a "Bangs-giving"-themed Thanksgiving dinner party, to which everyone must bring someone compatible for someone else.

Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 9 (S04E09) - 1
- Maybe you should just go out with him and see what happens. - No. Dad would flip and Mom hates him,
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He watched "The Breakfast Club" and decided to tape his own butt cheeks together.
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You don't remember. Biology - the frog?
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This roommate of mine in sophomore year - we absolutely hated him.
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This roommate of mine in sophomore year - we absolutely hated him.
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This roommate of mine in sophomore year - we absolutely hated him.
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He was, in addition to being a complete nincompoop, rather a chubby lad.
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We wound up throwing him out the window every night for a month, and then he transferred.
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Well, you're very welcome, Paris.
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It's the game, Rory. It's a memory - a college memory, and I intend on having as many college memories as possible.
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Asher! Oh, look at you!
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- Well, he's my grandfather. - You're stealing my interview.
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and managed to look remotely interested when Charlie babbled on pretentiously about nothing.
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Sure, you gotta pay the bills.
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- I could've opened with that, couldn't I have? - Then you wouldn't be you.
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Those men would get a clue, have some pride, grow a pair, and move on.
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- You're right, I apologize. So, how are you? - I'm fine, and you?
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- How did you do that? - Pulled a few strings, greased a few palms,
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- You find me repulsive. - No, I don't, and I wish I did.
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- That woman is working my last nerve. - So what?
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They can't light them up. The homeowners association has very strict rules about the amount of lights
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- May I have some more roast, please, Grandma? - Of course you may.
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- Lorelai. - Why does the question "Football?" get a "Lorelai"?
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You won't get bored?
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- Or Donlon. - Donlon just had his colon removed.
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Yeah, I know I hate football, but I couldn't get out of it. You could.
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Damn it. Emily, Cecil's the one who had his colon removed. I'm calling Donlon.
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- Did I put on underwear? - What?
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Yeah, chance ended when he dumped a chili-bean omelet on me the other day.
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Two bacons, two sausages, one pancake... I would really like you to write this down.
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and you can see my house from here. I totally need the money, and instead I get to return a box of doughnuts once a day.
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- We're going to the Harvard-Yale game. - You're going to the Harvard-Yale game?
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And I am here to tell you that it is hell watching you go through this, so I think for your own sake, you should fire Froggy.
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he never brings you food that's hot or yours, he can't distinguish bagels from doughnuts,
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- Did you give Kirk a napkin out of your back pocket? - Yeah.
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- Oh, my God. - Lorelai, Rory.
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- Oh, she can't go like that. - Crimson is Harvard's color.
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- I could just as easily have been the one dressed right. - You can wear my jacket.
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I'm sorry, Rory, we didn't mean to laugh at you. We love your Fig Newtons.
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There's much more to the big game day than the game, Lorelai.
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- The original Handsome Dan. - The very first Yale mascot.
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- And young woman. - We salute you, Dan.
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All right, give our boys the strength to do battle yet again for the honor of Yale,
Aired 2 years ago - Nov 18, 2014

Jess, Coach and Ryan attend a teachers' conference, led by education guru Brenda Brown. Back at the loft, Nick, Schmidt and Winston try to have a wild weekend while Jess is out of town.

Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 8 (S04E08) - 1
They were a big hit. Perfect for an executive's table. I got one for each of you.
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Please, let's discuss something other than New Jersey.
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These are just tryout articles to qualify.
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- You made it sing. - We're having all your articles laminated.
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It's a time-honored tradition. All our forebears had to do it.
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- Must be a mistake. - No, it's really not here.
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Oh, the review? Which was yours, the quartet?
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Well, you know, chamber-music recitals are very low-key, kind of yawny affairs.
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- The word yawn is insulting. - Yeah, but I was actually tired when I wrote it,
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- Five to four. - Five minutes to my call with Dave. I should get home.
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How did he take the news that you found a replacement for him in the band?
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- He sneezed. - Five days ago.
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There he is. Oh, widdle Davey, widdle Davey, peekaboo, peekaboo.
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Who? Michel?
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- I thought today was my chance. - I brought pastries.
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to the point where it looks worse than ever and you can't imagine it ever looking good ever again.
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Yikes.
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Every second Davey's brain is hard-wiring for life.
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- It's okay. - All right, this thing is getting ready to dive-bomb.
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Davey, come on, man, hard-wire those adult thoughts and try to remember what we're talking...
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Oh, I hate that. Whenever there's three of something, you always forget the third one. It's like a statistical thing.
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- You're crossing everything out. - Not everything.
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No, Rory, this is how it works. It's not personal. It's just not very good.
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- So I should try less hard? - Look, just write what you think.
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Yeah, I'm the happiest unpublished writer in the newspaper biz.
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- at the major news organizations. - You need chocolate.
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- Here we go. - Ah, I love these seats. They're so important.
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- Maybe she just has no friends in the ballet. - All ballet people do is ballet.
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- Thank you. Stan, get this to layout. - Yeah.
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- Okay. Thank you. - You're welcome.
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I'm going to make some tea.
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So, I looked up what Bruce said about baby talk and she was right.
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so I need an outlet. And you're my outwet - wittle Michel with the happy hair.
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- Well, I'll be. Look at you there. - It's nice to see you.
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- Very good. And you? - Very good, too.
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- Really? - I did, yes, because, well,
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I just remembered, I just ate.
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- that we've ever had ever, and it's all my mother's fault. - Your mother? Why?
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- The jug. The big jug. The monumental jug. - What jug?
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I'm guessing it means she's reserving a hall and ordering that "Stations of the Cross" ice sculpture.
Aired 2 years ago - Nov 11, 2014

Nick pretends to be gay to make his status as Jess' "ex" less of an issue to her new beau. To Coach's annoyance, Winston works his "Long Game" on their attractive neighbors, Michelle and Viv. Meanwhile, Schmidt panics when Cece considers having a breast reduction.

Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 7 (S04E07) - 1
So Beau's missing way more work than he thought he would, and he's letting me know it.
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I get time and a half on Saturdays.
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We're skipping the hospital and having the baby here.
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you guys have done a lot of research on this, right?
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zero chance of bringing home the wrong baby.
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Extra buckets - I gotta put it on the list.
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It was the same one that boy who couldn't hold it had to use in that after-school special.
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Get this. I just found the most amazing guitarist - a phenom.
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Oh, Mrs. Van-uppity? Well, maybe you're just her type.
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a show which presents onstage recreations of famous works of art,
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 7 (S04E07) - 12
The town of Woodbury was supposed to host it this year,
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- Your beard is so sexy. - How much time do we have?
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that we'd take it over successfully. It's a challenge, people, but doable.
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- Hey, it's your future wife. - Shut up.
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Miss Patty, you will be stage-managing.
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Hey, you're gonna be the girl in that Renoir painting again, right?
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No, mine was. And please don't point out the irony of my paying a lawyer to work for me.
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I just thought of the perfect painting for Luke to be in. "Cranky Guy in Baseball Cap."
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- What are they doing? - Well, I bet she's coming to...
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- Just what I thought. - This is a violation of my civil rights.
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Yes, that's what that means.
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- Watch the elbows, Kirk. - I just need to see the list.
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- James, son of Alpheus, give me five. - All right.
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We think Rory would be perfect for it. It's called "Portrait of a Young Girl Named Anthea."
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I played her seven years ago and received the proper accolades. This is a mistake.
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You are. Your look is perfect.
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- I did not flinch! - You almost knocked Terrence over.
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So, you'll ask Rory about the painting?
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- You seem calm. - Well, on the outside.
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Okay, now, don't take it out on poor Carol. It's not like she lobbied for it.
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 7 (S04E07) - 34
on Taylor's head and he suddenly likes me again. Oh, a brick.
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Bada-bing all over his nice ivy-league suit.
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I don't know about you, but I'm completely jazzed about this.
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- And the Renoir girl dress still fits you? - Like a glove.
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- Still haven't met them all. I'm Christ. - It's gonna be a lot of fun, huh?
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 7 (S04E07) - 41
Oh, okay. Maybe some other time.
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- Definitely. - It's got a feel that...
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 7 (S04E07) - 45
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He was alive before man walked on the moon.
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- He was our age when we were born. - He thinks we're great
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- Good. - Fine, we'll keep going,
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 7 (S04E07) - 49
Kids, man. In one ear and out the other.
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Fine. Bruce just suggested a little afternoon rest.
Aired 2 years ago - Nov 04, 2014

As part of Winston's police academy training, the loft must pass a home visit and background check, which shouldn't be a problem until Jess admits she might be hiding illegal substances in her closet.

Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 6 (S04E06) - 1
You're starting a new partnership. You need new photographs,
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And now we sign the real papers.
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I learned long ago, Jason, when it comes to things like this, Emily is always right.
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 6 (S04E06) - 5
"I think it's cute."
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- I love that it's okay to be Russian again. - It sounds lovely.
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A Russian theme. I like that.
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It is almost always imposed with the explicit purpose
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I apologize for this cruel little life experience, but what can I do?
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- Without a magic wand or some sort of fairy dust? - Preferably, yes.
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The roof's about to cave in so I can stay within our budget,
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She doing a launch party for your father's new business and she wants us to do the catering.
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- I swear she didn't sound mad. - Okay.
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Decorating, planning - it's gonna be a snap for you.
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- Excuse me, Lorelai. - Oh, my God, Kirk, I forgot you were here.
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Wow. They look very nice, Kirk.
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We haven't even settled on a color for the inn yet.
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So, I hear you're running a catering business now.
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 6 (S04E06) - 20
and I thought it would be nice to serve her a catered meal.
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I don't have high hopes for it, if that's what you're thinking.
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 6 (S04E06) - 22
Or you could take Lulu out to a restaurant.
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 6 (S04E06) - 23
Good. You'll see - it'll be great.
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You won't listen to me!
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- Paris, I have to study! - Go ahead.
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No, I haven't thought about what you said.
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Have him call you back on your cell phone. Then you can talk to him outside.
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- Yes, I am! - Yes, she is!
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You can, you know, because your grandma paid for the TV.
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Your mother is the pickiest woman I have ever catered for.
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We'll make a fish-cheese combo course just to be sure.
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- Hello, Mom. - Lorelai, hello. How nice to hear from you.
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You know, a few years ago, there was a company called Independent Catering.
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 6 (S04E06) - 39
You know, some people could mistake the Independence Catering Company
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 6 (S04E06) - 40
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No, it was your basic "Introducing the Independence Catering Company", flier.
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- Mom, the party? - All right.
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We'll need white and sterling roses, but not too high or formal.
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- Mom, I swear there's a flier. - Shame on you for swearing there's a flier.
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you are hiring a professional catering company. This is not a favor,
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How am I supposed to study when it smells like broccoli?
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- At least they don't smell like quiche. - Enough with the quiche, okay?
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 6 (S04E06) - 49
Have a seat, Kirk. I'll be right there.
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 6 (S04E06) - 50
Aired 2 years ago - Oct 14, 2014

When Coach's liaison with the school nurse gets messy, vice principal Jess must enforce a new, "no fraternization" policy among the teachers. But the tables soon get turned when she finds herself attracted to the hot new science teacher. Meanwhile, Nick is enjoying being Schmidt and Winston's secretary, after the loft gets a new home phone.

Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 5 (S04E05) - 1
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Never mind that some of us were up finishing a chem lab 'til 2:30 in the morning!
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Don't let your enemy sleep. Push him 'til he cracks.
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I always take enough for ten. I blame my brother.
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I mean, it's not like an official club or anything. There's no hats.
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- I'm sorry I haven't gotten it back to you yet. - Oh, it's okay.
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I just hid. But then when I saw you show up this morning like that,
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 5 (S04E05) - 10
Good. See ya, Rory.
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- What was that? - I was taking it outside.
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and prescreened three other designers for you. Here are their names.
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Normally, yes, that's true. However, every six months I give myself a crazy day
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though I know it was taught to you as a child,
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It's obvious Hemingway is just using Jake's impotence to indict a society
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 5 (S04E05) - 19
Please. That grossly ignores the social context.
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I can't this Saturday, but if it's good, maybe another time, okay?
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for even two minutes after it stops, some incredibly impatient person will come
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 5 (S04E05) - 23
Well, that's just wrong. I think you should quit school in protest.
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Between Seventh Day Adventist college and my mom's new fascination
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 5 (S04E05) - 25
Wait, have some pizza and tell Mama all about your day.
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- Wow, she went for the crafts. - This war is getting totally out of hand.
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and he takes my side in the debates, and he's decent to look at.
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- It could go to dinner, maybe a movie. - Mom...
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- You had me with dad - relationship. - Yes, but...
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Wait. Was that it?
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- That's anaglypta wallpaper. - What are you doing?
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I love horses. I've always loved horses ever since I was a little girl,
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About the same square footage as that box they threw McCain in.
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You know what else I like to do besides talk about a really good book?
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 5 (S04E05) - 40
Like right now, for example, starving, really.
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 5 (S04E05) - 41
Well, that fact has been pretty well established.
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 5 (S04E05) - 42
Oh, I can't believe you finally picked a name. It makes it real.
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 5 (S04E05) - 43
- Colgate? - His great-grandmother's name.
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and then he would know we were gonna have a boy,
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Is that okay? Because I know it's a little more expensive.
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 5 (S04E05) - 46
Yes, because she did her second-floor remodel like a year ago.
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my being, my ability to be this sparkling creature standing here before you --
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- Purple, purple, purple. - They were horrible.
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Hey, Luke. What's going on?
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 5 (S04E05) - 50
but it's going to be $4,000. Vicki from Vicki's Horse Supply called.
Aired 2 years ago - Oct 07, 2014

To prove that girls aren't shallow, Jess goes out on a date with a guy whose shortcomings fall way below the belt. Meanwhile, Winston and Cece pit Schmidt and Coach against each other, while convincing them they could be male models.

Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 4 (S04E04) - 1
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- I was gonna leave you out of it, but now... - Okay, you can stand up.
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and hear a contractor laugh at me every time I say,
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- Oh, what about next to the cake? - Yes, next to the cake.
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 4 (S04E04) - 11
What?
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I'm sorry, I meant to tell you. I just didn't know you were coming home this weekend.
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 4 (S04E04) - 13
The resemblance is uncanny.
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 4 (S04E04) - 14
We have come too far to let the band fall apart just because Dave...
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 4 (S04E04) - 15
Do you think a sound is so easy to find? Did you ever see that Glenn Miller movie?
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 4 (S04E04) - 16
Mick Jagger went to the London School of Economics.
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Lane, she's your friend.
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 4 (S04E04) - 18
Okay, well, I'll see you tomorrow.
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 4 (S04E04) - 19
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Yeah, I ran out of clean clothes and quarters, so...
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 4 (S04E04) - 21
So, I see you've taken over the town.
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 4 (S04E04) - 22
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- No, I know you didn't know. - I didn't want you to think...
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 4 (S04E04) - 24
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It's supposed to be... operatic.
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- What about now? - No, nothing.
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I swear, they told me it would be self-explanatory.
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 4 (S04E04) - 28
And Jimmy said he would install it for me because I do not have those skills yet.
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 4 (S04E04) - 29
and the neighbors are going, like, "Is that a fan? Did I leave the water running?"
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 4 (S04E04) - 30
- Yes, I do. - That is perfect.
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Oh, come on. Why would he think that?
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 4 (S04E04) - 33
Right. He's the best concierge in the world.
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 4 (S04E04) - 34
Picture life without him.
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 4 (S04E04) - 35
That must be one tired supermodel.
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 4 (S04E04) - 36
- Us? - Yes.
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 4 (S04E04) - 37
You have reservations at Tamtam at 7:00.
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 4 (S04E04) - 38
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- Oh, yes. Is that still happening? - It is still happening.
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the one where you told me that you called Lorelai and she didn't call back.
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 4 (S04E04) - 41
- well, we're sorry. - I'm not.
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 4 (S04E04) - 42
Especially when, for example, you're in the bathroom,
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Not much squirming, no backing away, but there was a little bit of darty-eye.
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 4 (S04E04) - 46
- It seems weird that we go. - Then we don't go.
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- Going where? - Dean's wedding. Fate's making us.
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Jim Morrison is not hanging out with Elvis, and the Kennedys did not kill Marilyn.
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- I know. - I just want him to be happy.
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Oh, there was something marked urgent in there,
Aired 2 years ago - Sep 30, 2014

Jess' dad arrives with his new girlfriend, who happened to be Jess and Cece's high-school rival. Meanwhile, Schmidt recruits the guys to be part of a focus group at work to help him land a big new account.

Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 3 (S04E03) - 1
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Yeah. Here. Oh, remember that?
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 3 (S04E03) - 7
Tom sent over the initial proposal for the work.
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 3 (S04E03) - 8
- I got the chimney report back. - Oh, shoot.
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- Yes, Jackson! - You're supposed to use the walkie-talkie.
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it's gonna take some time to get the inn up and running, right?
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- Yes, but... - Okay, here.
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 3 (S04E03) - 13
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So she offered us the job and I just took it. It's Thursday.
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Maybe.
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This - the furniture, the couch, the chairs, the rug.
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as well as watching television, and you would need a little bit of support.
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 3 (S04E03) - 19
Did you look in the entertainment center yet?
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 3 (S04E03) - 20
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Four of us who live here. There are four of us who live here together.
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You are in the real world now.
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 3 (S04E03) - 23
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Grandma broke into my dorm and redid the entire common room
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Tanna still doesn't know she's at Yale, Paris saw it and said nothing.
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- I know. - She didn't even ask.
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 3 (S04E03) - 28
You've seen her pull stunts like this on me for years.
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 3 (S04E03) - 29
and I cannot guarantee that the other people will love it as much as I do,
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 3 (S04E03) - 30
I am hurt on a level you will not be able to understand
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and my entire future, and at least with you, she threw in an ottoman.
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 3 (S04E03) - 33
Emily, you have excellent taste.
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What - that the turncoat company I used to work for is cutting my pension?
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 3 (S04E03) - 36
Yes, I liked Digger when he was fetching my coffee.
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You did what?
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 3 (S04E03) - 38
That's it - no drink, no handshake, nothing.
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 3 (S04E03) - 39
but I'm anticipating the themes quickly degenerating to "Hey, walking works -- let's drink."
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 3 (S04E03) - 40
to solidify our social standing at Yale.
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 3 (S04E03) - 41
Look, we can still go to the party.
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 3 (S04E03) - 42
After all, you have all this fancy furniture and a big TV to lord over people.
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 3 (S04E03) - 43
We've got fairy necklaces, we've got tree heads.
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Those colored popcorn balls. Rory used to go mental over those things.
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There's 4,000 people in that movie who wear capes - you can't pick one?
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Now I'm sure it's tempting to emotionally stunt your daughter
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- Well, you wouldn't listen to me. - Give me that phone!
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- So tell me about the party. - It's nothing,
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I'm not telling you anything. I just want to make sure that at the end of four years,
Aired 2 years ago - Sep 23, 2014

Schmidt tutors Jess in the not-so-fine-art of dating via mobile apps. Meanwhile, Winston is desperate to make a good impression on his fellow police cadets, which backfires when Nick, Coach and Cece show up at a party thrown by fellow officers.

Aired 2 years ago - Sep 16, 2014

At the last wedding of the summer, the gang makes a pact: Each of them will get lucky by night's end. Jess sets her sights on the best man, who also has caught the eye of a beautiful scientist. Meanwhile, Schmidt and Nick get an indecent proposal. Winston recovers from his police academy training, and Coach panics when he realizes he already has hooked up with every woman at the party. MORE -LESS

Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 1 (S04E01) - 1
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Listen, since we slept on the plane, we should go to sleep now,
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Gilmore, Lorelai, yes.
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 1 (S04E01) - 8
She got our arrival dates mixed up and she was just worried,
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 1 (S04E01) - 9
I still cannot believe Babette did this.
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Well, pray they match my blue suit?
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 1 (S04E01) - 11
Yes. In fact, I have here in my hand a schedule of all the activities
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 1 (S04E01) - 12
and we hit three of the crappier movies that are out.
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 1 (S04E01) - 13
Monday is mani/pedi, facial, haircut, go to the psychic,
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 1 (S04E01) - 14
Oh, good. Well, everything's in order,
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Excuse me, every woman who's ever purchased
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We'll start with Patty, work our way clockwise around the town, end with Andrew.
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Yeah, I know, but I wonder if he actually went.
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 1 (S04E01) - 18
- Oh, please, you are not. - I am, too. I'm gonna kill you.
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- So what? - A giant window! Right here!
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to bring back two of the worst hours of my childhood.
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Oh, we forgot to bring him back a gift. Oh no!
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Everything you buy here has a Hello, Kitty stamped on the bottom.
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- I missed you so much! - We missed you so much.
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Hey, I hear you touched the Pope! Are you hungry?
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Come on, Rory, rub my stomach.
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 1 (S04E01) - 27
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 1 (S04E01) - 28
until a pretty nurse in a nice white outfit would come out and say,
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 1 (S04E01) - 29
We can be in that waiting room together, pacing, waiting,
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 1 (S04E01) - 30
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 1 (S04E01) - 31
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 1 (S04E01) - 32
Oh, a little boy. I know nothing about little boys.
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 1 (S04E01) - 33
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 1 (S04E01) - 34
Nope. Luke just seemed kind of freaked out about something.
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 1 (S04E01) - 35
So... are you gonna name him Lorelai?
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 1 (S04E01) - 36
I don't know what you're talking about.
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 1 (S04E01) - 37
- As in Sochelle Crab. - Yes, exactly.
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 1 (S04E01) - 38
and now she's the most successful jamstress in Paris.
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 1 (S04E01) - 39
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 1 (S04E01) - 40
A couple things about you stick. You have a good time?
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 1 (S04E01) - 41
who were heading to Ireland to stake out the Clarence Hotel.
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 1 (S04E01) - 42
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 1 (S04E01) - 43
Here.
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 1 (S04E01) - 44
except this burning desire to be the world's greatest jamstress.
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 1 (S04E01) - 45
No, forget it. I didn't get you anything on my trip either. We're even.
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 1 (S04E01) - 46
What did you and Nicole do on the boat?
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 1 (S04E01) - 47
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 1 (S04E01) - 48
Scoop toward you, rolling smoothly.
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 1 (S04E01) - 49
Ah, there you are. Hello, your majesty.
Recap of New Girl Season 4 Episode 1 (S04E01) - 50
Taylor, you didn't ask me if I wanted to be the Ice Cream Queen.