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Season 6

Aired 8 years ago - May 04, 2008

When Peter gets a pet parrot, he begins acting like a pirate. Peter accidentally kills the bird after raising hell through all of Quahog. Meanwhile, when Brian is visiting the vet, Chris falls in love with the intern, Anna.

Aired 9 years ago - Apr 27, 2008

Brian, afraid that he may have lost his last chance at love, searches for a former flame, Tracy. To his surprise, he discovers that he is the father to her son, Dylan. Tracy decides that Brian should raise the boy, and she drops him off at the Griffin's house. When Dylan runs rough-shot in the house, Brian's attitude towards parenting doesn't settle too well with Lois and Peter. MORE -LESS

Aired 9 years ago - Mar 02, 2008

Peter and Lois's marriage hits a bit of a snag. When Brian wins the New England Rising Writer's award, the three of them head to Martha's Vineyard for a nice relaxing vacation. Peter's usual drinking habits take over, and he soon spirals out of control, as does Brian's self restraint, as he soon professes his love for Lois. Peter and Brian test their friendship over the woman of their dreams. MORE -LESS

Recap of Family Guy Season 6 Episode 10 (S06E10) - 1
Should we just ask her how old she is?
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So, Meg, your birthday's coming up, huh?
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- Not enough? - You stupid son of a bitch!
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Meg's gonna open her presents in a little bit.
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he notices a grasshopper on the ground.
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Meg, your father worked very hard to put this party together.
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Well, then how about... a dozen scarves?!
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Are my long john stied to the end of those?
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The first season of Sister, Sister on DVD?
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I was thinking maybe one of those old-timey...
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In the meantime, I leave you with the musical stylings of Chris Griffin.
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come closer.
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but you do kind of drink a lot, and,
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- What the fuck?! - Hey, at least I'm not drinking, Brian.
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"Dare card : Have her do a strip tease
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- If I can't have it, nobody can! - That is enough!
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- to some of your deepest memories. - Yeah, I'm getting something.
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It was horrible, Rupert. It was like a nightmare.
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Oh, it was awful, Rupert. I felt terrified and
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I promise I will never lay a hand on you again.
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Who's my real father?
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To Ireland!
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- We're going to miss you, Dad. - Come back soon, Daddy. I love you.
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Oh! Thank you!
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- and I should be punished for it. Go! - Well, I guess it's not that big a deal.
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You really got to stop misbehaving. You're getting on Mommy's nerves.
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This is quite a country, Brian.
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Ah, did ***** who say a word *****, hmm?
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- You're my father. - Oh, am I now?
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Just ask me sheep, O'Brian.
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Peter! You are a fat stinking drunk.
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he'll have no choice but to respect me. Get me a beer, Brian.
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And what makes you think you can hold your own with the *likes* of me?
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You're the broth of me own stubby shillelagh, all right.
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You knocked up my mom and never called her again.
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Shaughnessy, Riordan and Rooney, they'll tell you the same
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Aired 9 years ago - Feb 17, 2008

James Woods returns to seek revenge against Peter. James Woods finds Peter's wallet, which he lost at Barry Manilow concert, and procedes to steal Peter's identity, and his family. Peter decides to ruin James' career and image.

Aired 9 years ago - Jan 13, 2008

Peter decides to grow a mustache, and after being mistaken for a fireman, ends up lending a hand when a fire breaks out at a local fast food restaurant. The owner gives him unlimited burgers as a thank you, but he eats too many and has a stroke. When Peter recovers, he vows to expose the fast-food company for what it really is, becoming friends with a genetically engineered cow along the way. MORE -LESS

Aired 9 years ago - Nov 25, 2007

After Quahog is hit by a flood, Meg winds up in the hospital in a coma. When she wakes up and sees a cute med student, they immediately hit it off. Overprotective of his daughter, Peter is determined to drive the med student away. That is until Meg reveals that she is pregnant.

Recap of Family Guy Season 6 Episode 7 (S06E07) - 1
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'cause they have so much fun cleaning the dishes.
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- What? - He say "Nice day,"
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I hope I'm allowed to do this. My mommy says, "Don't run with scissors."
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Oh, this one's kind of nice. Wha...?
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Oh, that's... God, you look great, I mean, you're all, you're all in shape.
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Um, i-it's a fun show if you haven't seen it.
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- What happened? - She shot me down, Brian.
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Plus...
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Oh, I haven't given up yet, Brian.
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- Hey, baby. - Hi, Stewie.
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You ever just let your balls hang out, B-Ri?
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Just watch.
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Why the hell would she respond positively to such a negative comment?
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You see, I thought you were Ray Liotta because your skin
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Oh, Smilla, your sense of snow is equaled only by your sense of love.
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I was the original "Pretty Woman."
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"What is that? What is that on my hand?"
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Better go rassle up some Chinese food, Hopalong Nussbaum.
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Oh, look at this guy. Now, there's someone who cuts his own hair.
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I know. Look at that sunset against the skyline.
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Peter, I can't lose the wheelchair. I need it to move.
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Stewie, this is Victor. We did a Flintstones vitamins commercial together.
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guy picks his nose, then eats it.
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Victor, would you excuse us for a second?
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He happens to be a very intelligent, successful actor.
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- Uh, what's for dinner? - Playdoh spaghetti.
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Look, can we just drop this and have a normal pretend dinner?
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Sorry we're late, everyone, but JonBenet here took forever with her makeup.
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Wouldn't that be a shame, if they took all my money out of both our wallets.
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- for three hours waxing your eyebrows. - You swore you would never...
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That's what it all comes down to, isn't it? I'm not grown up enough for you.
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You wanna come over here and quiet me down?
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Oh! Is funny because open heart surgery not easy at all.
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Sorry.
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But one day, Vageena went swimming too soon after eating a sandwich...
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Fin.
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- Stewie? - Yeah?
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- It's not your fault. - Why is it so hard?
Aired 9 years ago - Nov 18, 2007

Peter starts an anti-immigration group, however, he quickly changes his mind when he finds out that he was born in Mexico. Unable to prove his citizenship, pass the naturalization test or convince investigators that his marriage to Lois is for real, he ends up working for Carter as a landscaper, all the while fighting for immigration rights.

Recap of Family Guy Season 6 Episode 6 (S06E06) - 1
'cause that makes it more likely that one of those kids'll grow up
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that condoms make sex less pleasurable.
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Oh, boy. I am not going to hear the end of this.
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I am all done writing plays for the day,
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I'm supposed to eat them. Of course, it all adds up!
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And sometimes, just for the hell of it,
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But, Montana, when will you be back?
Recap of Family Guy Season 6 Episode 6 (S06E06) - 9
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What? That's ridiculous.
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Can't you go down the school and try to reason with them?
Recap of Family Guy Season 6 Episode 6 (S06E06) - 12
All right, students, we have a special speaker today
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I was just passing through on my way to see The Matrix.
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Boy, I sure had fun at the pizza parlor tonight, Debbie.
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I mean, besides not running over that yahoo from Jefferson High.
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Jefferson High is our rival.
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These rings are a symbol of your commitment
Recap of Family Guy Season 6 Episode 6 (S06E06) - 18
Now, I know this person looks a little mixed up,
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the invading forces of the Tooth Fairy.
Recap of Family Guy Season 6 Episode 6 (S06E06) - 20
Uh, you might want to check under your pillow.
Recap of Family Guy Season 6 Episode 6 (S06E06) - 21
That-that cheesecake was for everyone.
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If you want Brian to say : "I'm not touching that one,"
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We now return to Laguna Beach.
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You see, Meg, you're what they call a "practice girl."
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Oh, there it is. I see it.
Recap of Family Guy Season 6 Episode 6 (S06E06) - 28
Grimace is Ronald McDonald's autistic friend.
Recap of Family Guy Season 6 Episode 6 (S06E06) - 29
This is nonsense. You can't force abstinence on kids.
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Doug and I are part of the Opal Ring Crusade,
Recap of Family Guy Season 6 Episode 6 (S06E06) - 32
oh, my God!
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That's right, Tom. It appears that students have taken to having ear sex
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Brian, Brian, look, I'm Gary Busey.
Recap of Family Guy Season 6 Episode 6 (S06E06) - 35
But man, I'll tell ya, all that purging just makes her body look fantastic.
Recap of Family Guy Season 6 Episode 6 (S06E06) - 36
Oh, well, you know, I just wanted to touch base, see how everything's...
Recap of Family Guy Season 6 Episode 6 (S06E06) - 37
No, I'm saying Santa's thin. Get in there and throw up!
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Get off of me!
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I'll be more convincing than Mel Gibson when he apologized to the Jews.
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Stewie, this is ridiculous. There's something I have to tell you.
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Oh, wait a second!
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You see that guy with the overcoat?
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You should wait until you're in love.
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Maybe I'll use two condoms at the same time.
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Enter now.
Aired 9 years ago - Nov 11, 2007

Presumed dead, Lois returns from the wilderness and names Stewie as her killer. On the look out for Stewie, Joe leads a manhunt around Quahog. Determined to take over the world again, Stewie auditions for the American Idol. Desperate to stop Stewie, Lois realizes what she must do.

Recap of Family Guy Season 6 Episode 5 (S06E05) - 1
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In the hole in the bottom of the sea
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In the bottom of the sea
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Okay, so we've established she ain't got no alibi.
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since I came up with that new place to hide my porn.
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but her breasts was immaculate.
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Oh, that sucks, man, I'm wide awake. Hey, Quagmire, you want to...
Recap of Family Guy Season 6 Episode 5 (S06E05) - 11
What we need out there now is another Tim Daly.
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No, no, it took place in an airport. Th-Th-The thing was on for ten years.
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Oh, don't worry, Brian. If she's as ugly as I think she is,
Recap of Family Guy Season 6 Episode 5 (S06E05) - 14
Brian, she's stunning.
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But a moron with large breasts you can use as mountains
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That's got to be a tough job.
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Well, that's not my problem.
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Without you, Angela would have been all over my case.
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Lois, take a letter.
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For your information, Jillian is very bright
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the new seat covers she just got for her Jetta.
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Is it plugged in?
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Uh, so, yeah, um...
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You know, I've been noticing you around the steno pool.
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I think it would be so hot for you and me to have sex in my office.
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but so far you're a bigger buzzkill than Buzz Killington.
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Now here's a fellow attempting to ride a bicycle.
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- What are you doing here? - Oh, hi, Brian.
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Hey, Oogie!
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Hey, you wanna know something cool?
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I just really want to go dancing... Oh!
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and, truthishly, we should just accept that.
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Hey, come on. We're-we're a legitimate couple, right?
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No, nothing. It's just an expression.
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Gloss rhymes with hair!
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"Ably performed by the entire ensemble."
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Because, Lois, I already wrote the letter to "Penthouse Forum,"
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Yeah, what'd I tell you, huh?
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You are now all caught up with your work.
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never again will you have to listen to her talk like this?
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just wanted to spend some time with you.
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Aired 9 years ago - Nov 04, 2007

Lois and Peter sail off on a cruise. Jealous that he was left behind, Stewie's matricidal tendencies are rekindled. When Brian challenges him to actually do it, Stewie carries out his diabolical plan.

Recap of Family Guy Season 6 Episode 4 (S06E04) - 1
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Peter, she knows she untied her bikini. Women don't forget those things.
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I'm sorry, but I'm afraid I'm gonna have to bar you
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- Boy, this is romantic, isn't it, Lois? - Oh, it sure is, sweetie.
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- And then what are you gonna do? - Let's see...
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- Then I shall do that as well. - And call her a bitch.
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Are you... You're getting some kind of sick, sexual thrill off this, aren't you?
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Rupert, I've been all talk. So much time wasted.
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Growing all the time
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And sometimes, I put my speakers facing out my window
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And that was the first time I saw the northern lights at their peak.
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- Peter! - Hang on, hang on, Lois. Don't ruin it.
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"You want to get an abortion with the abortionist having a stump hand?"
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Okay, explain to me exactly what I did wrong.
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Pleasuring a man with a socked foot, one time, does not make a person gay.
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With all the indignities I've been forced to suffer day in and day out
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And finally, still no word on the disappearance of Lois Griffin,
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Listen to my voice. That sounds cool.
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It's been six days, Peter. I'm sorry, but we had to call off the search.
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Harrison Ford Telling Random People He Wants His Family Back.
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So, I'm a Leo and your ad said that you're a Cancer?
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- That... That sounds... - Yes, it is very unpleasant.
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Just remember, whatever you do, don't tell Chris I'm dating.
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All right, sweetie, you ready to get some new notebooks,
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Which is just what someone who pulled off the perfect murder
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- I'll just poop and fall asleep. - My God, you did it. You actually did it.
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Either of you guys think it's a little suspicious
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What else is in the news? Oh, oh, oh, Bernie Goetz, you hear about this?
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Hey, Stewie, I found this receipt for a speedboat rental upstairs in your room.
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Man, I haven't dug through these cans since Lois died.
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There's no doubt anymore. Peter murdered his wife.
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So let's have another cup o' coffee And let's have another piece o'pie!
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Don't make us go good cop, developmentally disabled cop on you.
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We can put you at the scene
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Take a couple out of the bin we can't find matches for.
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Look, don't you kids buy any of this for a second. Your father is innocent.
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This trial is called to order.
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Yes, and as a favor to the court,
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No, no, no. When you see the enemy come over the horizon,
Aired 9 years ago - Oct 07, 2007

When Joe feels that his disability is holding Bonnie back from living a full life, he decides to get a leg transplant. Excited about his new ability to walk, Joe engages in extreme sports, and soon ditches his current friends, for more active ones. Peter and the guys are upset at how Joe is acting and decide to teach him a lesson.

Recap of Family Guy Season 6 Episode 3 (S06E03) - 1
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Hang on, hang on.
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- That's not bad. - Better than mine.
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and, uh, I poked my head in the window
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Any what?
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Yeah, you'd better put on the old wool cap.
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'cause it's usually spelled with an "f."
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All right, one more pre-party drink, and then we'll head off to the Clam.
Recap of Family Guy Season 6 Episode 3 (S06E03) - 13
We should march in there and remind them that they have wives.
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All right, so I'm skulking around the intensive care unit,
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Yeah, this is sort of lame.
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Sometimes I feel more useless than the head of the Maid's Union.
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Hello. Oh, hi, Lois.
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Poor Bonnie. She deserves so much better than me.
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Look, if it's a financial issue,
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I want to walk again. I'll do what ever it takes.
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You know, Peter says we sound alike.
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we'll select the legs most suited to your body from our inventory of donors.
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Ah, Joe. You are gonna be happier than bullfrogs on vacation in Ethiopia.
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Now, I'll just pop in the how-to video,
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Gentlemen, I give you... the new Joe Swanson.
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Oh, great. We'll take them home, we'll give them to Brian.
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And you guys are my best friends. I want you to experience it all with me.
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- Peter, this doesn't seem safe. - Yeah, I'm afraid I might...
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- I don't know about this, Joe. - There is no fear in this dojo!
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All right, we're gonna do it once more.
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When the band began to play The stars were shining bright
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Oh, I'm sorry. I thought we were still going.
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a drum of grape jam?
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Okay, you stay right here, big funny gal. I'll be right back with...
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I'm taking my new friends. This is Parker, Quentin and Portland.
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I decided it's time I got some friends more suited to my status.
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Okay, okay.
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How is it anything like a monkey having the keys to an amusement park?
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Well, Peter, there have been a lot of changes in Joe's life,
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- Shut up! - No, you shut up!
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Think I'll go for a walk outside now The summer sun's calling my name...
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Do any of you know the tale of how corn meal came to be
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There's nothing to talk about. I've out grown you, Bonnie.
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Boys, there's only one answer.
Recap of Family Guy Season 6 Episode 3 (S06E03) - 49
Bonnie, I forgot my Soloflex.
Recap of Family Guy Season 6 Episode 3 (S06E03) - 50
Aired 9 years ago - Sep 30, 2007

Peter convinces Brian to move in with his girlfriend Jillian and Stewie tags along to help pay the rent but he tries to interfere with their relationship. Meanwhile Meg and Chris get jobs at the convenience store where Chris befriends the manager Carl who leaves Meg to do all the work. Carl soon fires her and promotes Chris to the co-boss.

Recap of Family Guy Season 6 Episode 2 (S06E02) - 1
- Here? Yeah, sure! - Great. You start tomorrow.
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Oh.
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I'm more unattractive to put in a lead role.
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Plus, it's given me a chance to work on my novel.
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who's a pilot, that's been taken captive by a militant Islamic country.
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That's one of the sequels!
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Well, I don't know what you mean by that, but how about that Cameron, huh?
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I really wish he would.
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and she is smart as the day is wide.
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Oh, I was just on my way back from the cobbler.
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And that's the worst part. I can't afford the rent.
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Piss off, you perverted old freak!
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Chris, I need you to stack the boxes in the back for me.
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It's pretty hot.
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the direction was excellent but I was very disappointed that she, um...
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All right. So, like, you see a hotgirl,
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Brian, there's no more graham crackers!
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Oh, no! Oh, Brian, we need paper towels!
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What?!
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No, you can't...
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Like, she's gettable, you know, like, like, Elizabeth Shue.
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Like totally naked in, um, Leaving Las Vegas.
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He's a failed writer who just decides that,
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- Uh, yeah, yeah. - She was in that.
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Brian, are you guys up?
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Yes, Brian, if you're mean to me, I'll stop paying the rent.
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You didn't want to move in with me?
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And then he got Parkinson's.
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"that all men are created equal."
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The only job I could find was for a phone sex line, and I sucked at it.
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Well, um...
Recap of Family Guy Season 6 Episode 2 (S06E02) - 37
Oh, shut up, you bastard!
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She got a worse deal than that no-armed baseball player, Bucky LaGrange.
Recap of Family Guy Season 6 Episode 2 (S06E02) - 39
as clearly the fans' sympathy for this scrappy, little no-armed man
Recap of Family Guy Season 6 Episode 2 (S06E02) - 40
does this team stick with an arm-less second baseman?
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What is all this? What's going on?
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What food can't make up its mind?
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No, Chris, she's a pain in the ass. I-I don't want her back in here.
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Remember when Jack Noseworthy's eyes explode?
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You let the fat man talk you into moving out.
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Go get her, Brian.
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What are you doing here?
Aired 9 years ago - Sep 23, 2007

Peter retells the story of Star Wars in this hour-long episode of Family Guy. When Princess Leia is captured by the evil Darth Vader the droids C-3PO and R2-D2 escape to the planet Tatooine to find help from the Rebel Alliance. There they encounter Luke Skywalker, Han Solo, Chewbacca and Obi-Wan Kenobi who infiltrate the Death Star then rescue the captive princess from the Death Star and return to aid the Rebellion in its fight against the Galactic Empire. MORE -LESS