Status
Continuing
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Airs
Sundays 9:00 PM on FOX (US)
SEASON
EPISODE

Season 2

Aired 16 years ago - Aug 01, 2000

After a father-son camping trip, Peter realizes how irresponsible Chris is after raccoons steal their food and their car. Back at home, Peter gets Chris a job at the local golf course to try and teach him to be more responsible. Chris is content to just pick up golf balls, until he discovers that Peter has entered the father-son golf tournament, with Cleveland Jr.! Discouraged that Peter is focusing all his attention on Cleveland Jr., Chris rebels by hanging out with Quagmire at strip clubs. Ultimately, Cleveland Jr. abandons Peter who recruits Chris at the last minute. However, when they lose, Peter must deal with an angry group of gamblers who put money on Cleveland Jr. Despite all the recent heartache, Chris gives his dad his first paycheck in order to save his butt! MORE -LESS

Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 21 (S02E21) - 1
Hey, Quagmire, you up for some campin'?
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Surfside Six
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 21 (S02E21) - 5
I used it to make the fort from F Troop.
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Bang! I'm Daniel Boone. I'm a man. I'm a big man.
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- You think he's onto us, Christof? - No. He's an idiot.
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- I'm not here to impress you. Am I, Dad? - Did I say you could rest yet?
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 21 (S02E21) - 9
If you turn the light on, they slam him into the fridge.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 21 (S02E21) - 10
You remember that short-lived sitcom Fish?
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 21 (S02E21) - 11
Oh, my God! My fish is gone!
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Chris, you are responsible for guarding the camp while we fish.
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Hold me for what?
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Look, Stewie. Look at the dancin' kitty.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 21 (S02E21) - 16
and somewhere, Scott Baio is ploughin' a woman he doesn't love.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 21 (S02E21) - 17
Yeah. All we caught was a tyre, a boot, a tin can and this book of clichés.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 21 (S02E21) - 18
"And then there's a guy. Let's get him in trouble with his dad! Ha ha ha!"
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 21 (S02E21) - 19
I'll teach the boy. Come, my son. I'll show you the ways of the herd...
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 21 (S02E21) - 20
Well, you always do the skull gag when you're depressed. Talk to me.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 21 (S02E21) - 21
Then I tried teachin' him how to get out of payin' a check.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 21 (S02E21) - 22
Waiter, there's a dead guy in my...
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 21 (S02E21) - 23
Isn't she great? Now you see why I married her.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 21 (S02E21) - 24
For the Last Time, I'm not Mr T by Ving Rhames.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 21 (S02E21) - 25
You actually believe Lois had them inject you to make you healthy?
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 21 (S02E21) - 26
I should have known. Her treachery knows no limits. I...
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 21 (S02E21) - 27
to change my son from a lazy slacker into a workin' man.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 21 (S02E21) - 28
Hey, you that Griffin boy's father? Paddy Tanninger, the caddy manager.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 21 (S02E21) - 29
Hey, this kid here just knocked the ball 300 yards.
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Sometimes I wonder if he's got the epilepsy.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 21 (S02E21) - 31
You and the robot go out into the wilderness and take this mincing paedophile with you.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 21 (S02E21) - 32
Huh? You'll see. I'm gonna turn this kid into the greatest golfer ever.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 21 (S02E21) - 33
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I'd say it's some kind of mind-control serum.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 21 (S02E21) - 35
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Like when you were three, and you ate those adult brownies
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 21 (S02E21) - 38
It's not small, no no no
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 21 (S02E21) - 39
Look, here's your first week's pay.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 21 (S02E21) - 40
Package for Glen Quagmire.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 21 (S02E21) - 41
- Hey, what's wrong, kid? - My dad doesn't care about me any more.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 21 (S02E21) - 42
Well, there's your problem. Jobs are for suckers.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 21 (S02E21) - 43
All right.
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Mr Quagmire, what does "hic-a-doo-La" mean?
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 21 (S02E21) - 47
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- You got it. - Would you hate me if I called you Webster?
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This is the perfect way to show what a great father figure I've been to Cleveland Junior.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 21 (S02E21) - 50
Aired 16 years ago - Jul 25, 2000

In homage to “Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory”, a local brewery has a contest offering tours of the plant to whoever finds a scroll placed in their beer. Lois’ prodigy piano student, Ling, drops from an upcoming competition leaving Lois at a loss, until Peter comes home drunk and sits down at the piano.

Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 20 (S02E20) - 1
OK, be cool. Maintain.
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fat people have Wisconsin, and I have the Pawtucket Brewery.
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Stop it! What if the kids were to see you drinkin' like this?
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Huh. Nothin'.
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- Nice. - Oh, I don't have time for this.
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Like saltwater taffy or a Chunky.
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Yes, well, there are more important things in life than a piano competition.
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but I'm sure you're all with me when I say "Congratulations, you son of a bitch."
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 20 (S02E20) - 11
Hey, you guys! It's a fake! There's still a scroll out there!
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 20 (S02E20) - 12
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I've found it! I've found the last scroll!
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Aah!
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 20 (S02E20) - 17
Now I know how Barbra Streisand felt the day she married James Brolin.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 20 (S02E20) - 18
Honey, I'm sorry. You know you can't sneak up on me.
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Let the tour begin.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 20 (S02E20) - 21
Chumbawamba, gobbledy-goo
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 20 (S02E20) - 22
What do you think of the one you call God
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 20 (S02E20) - 23
Or to Chumbawamba gobbledy-glue!
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I got the mu... Oh, my God!
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 20 (S02E20) - 26
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You'll drive drunker than Oksana Baiul
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Though the beer may be free
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This beer will still be carbonated long after you die of old age
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 20 (S02E20) - 32
Must be the beer. Hey! Hey, check this out.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 20 (S02E20) - 33
Holy crap! There's nothing to grab onto!
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 20 (S02E20) - 34
- Hey! Hey, pull my finger. - My pleasure.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 20 (S02E20) - 35
- I want you to leave immediately! - Oh, come on!
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 20 (S02E20) - 36
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Not now, Peter. Meg and I are havin' a little girl time,
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 20 (S02E20) - 38
Peter, that's incredible! I don't understand how...
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 20 (S02E20) - 39
- I... I can't! - Peter, talent doesn't disappear just like that.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 20 (S02E20) - 40
Oh, jeez, this hangover's killin' me. I haven't felt this crappy since I went to that museum.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 20 (S02E20) - 41
Huh. I think we've found his muse.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 20 (S02E20) - 42
- You're gonna be my first champion. - Oh, play that sad walking-away song
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 20 (S02E20) - 43
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Uh-oh! Lois! I'm losin' my buzz!
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 20 (S02E20) - 45
Too bad Loretta doesn't allow white literature in our household.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 20 (S02E20) - 46
Now I ask you, why should I kill this... Count Chocula?
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 20 (S02E20) - 47
Stay out of it, Herb. You're not even his real father.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 20 (S02E20) - 48
I've been keeping you ripped out of your head for my own selfish needs.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 20 (S02E20) - 49
Oh! I'll drive.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 20 (S02E20) - 50
Aired 16 years ago - Jul 18, 2000

After an interview at Brown University, Meg realizes she needs more extra-curricular activities to gain entrance to this prestigious school. She joins every club and even tries cheerleading, but fails miserably at them all. Finally, she decides to join the school newspaper. Her journalism career goes nowhere, until Peter fabricates a story regarding actor Luke Perry. Peter writes a gossipy article, but uses Meg's byline. When the article is published it creates a sensation, because Peter claimed Luke Perry was gay. Meg and Peter soon become embroiled in a headline-grabbing lawsuit when Luke sues them for defamation of character. MORE -LESS

Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 19 (S02E19) - 1
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Blast! This isn't the first time I've been thwarted by my small stature.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 19 (S02E19) - 3
It can enslave the human race. Come on. It's solid titanium.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 19 (S02E19) - 4
I'm tired of being small.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 19 (S02E19) - 5
"Meg." Hm.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 19 (S02E19) - 6
I'm not sure you're Brown material. Don't you have any extracurricular activities?
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 19 (S02E19) - 7
- We're not having dinner. - Then be quiet.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 19 (S02E19) - 8
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Lois, I challenge you to a race around the world.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 19 (S02E19) - 11
That was so sweet. It was wicked, awesome.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 19 (S02E19) - 12
You never seem to be that interested in journalism-or journalists, such as myself.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 19 (S02E19) - 13
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- Are you Sarah Connor? - No, I'm Meg Griffin. I need to interview you.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 19 (S02E19) - 15
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You just don't give up, do you?
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 19 (S02E19) - 19
Mm! Oh!
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 19 (S02E19) - 20
That's why I started Stewie's Big and Tall Man Shop. If you're portly or tall,
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 19 (S02E19) - 21
If I could build a device to harness the size of that leviathan,
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 19 (S02E19) - 22
Mayor West, you've been talking for an hour and I don't have anything I can use.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 19 (S02E19) - 23
It's cost $150,000 of the taxpayers' money
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 19 (S02E19) - 24
You can't print that! It'll compromise my entire investigation!
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 19 (S02E19) - 25
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Not my bit, but still funny. System off.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 19 (S02E19) - 27
Oh, my God. "Corruption in City Hall." This is amazing.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 19 (S02E19) - 28
I know kids, and this story's gonna put 'em to sleep.
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Duh-duh! Dah-dah-dah-dah-dah-dah!
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 19 (S02E19) - 32
Duh-duh duh-duh-duh-daah!
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Duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duuh!
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- Don't you read the papers? He's gay. - You can't just print lies.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 19 (S02E19) - 36
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Don't mention it at the veterans' hospital. Those guys are committed to the lie.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 19 (S02E19) - 38
Ponies like food, don't they? Oh, boy.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 19 (S02E19) - 39
it'll make people believe Meg's story is true!
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 19 (S02E19) - 40
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- What? - It's for a school project.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 19 (S02E19) - 42
or I shall transform your blue collar into a red one and...
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 19 (S02E19) - 43
All right, now, we gotta be very crafty so Luke Perry doesn't recognise us.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 19 (S02E19) - 44
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Oh, my muscles are all... Look, they're all shiny with oil.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 19 (S02E19) - 47
Mission accomplished, Peter.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 19 (S02E19) - 48
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- How could Dad do this to me? - Aw, honey, he wasn't doing it to you.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 19 (S02E19) - 50
Come on. Let's go get our nails done. Chris, take care of Stewie.
Aired 16 years ago - Jul 12, 2000

The town zoning laws won't allow Peter to build a pool in his yard. When he tries to get a permit, he discovers that his property is actually not part of Quahog, and therefore not part of the United States. Armed with this new information, Peter makes his land his own country, calling it Petoria. When Peter gets no respect in the United Nation, he decides to invade Joe's pool, which brings the U.S. Army to his border. The Griffins can only survive so long without water, electricity, heat, or access to the United States, and finally, Lois and the kids leave President Peter, along with Brian, to his third-world country. Peter finally repatriates only a week after seceding. MORE -LESS

Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 18 (S02E18) - 1
Did you incur any medical expenses this year?
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 18 (S02E18) - 2
OK. Here goes.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 18 (S02E18) - 3
- You're not entitled to a refund. - Aah!
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 18 (S02E18) - 4
- But at least I can give 'em a pool. - Um... I say.
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- Hey, Lois! - What?
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 18 (S02E18) - 6
- What the...? - Hi. You guys have any Cheese Doodles?
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 18 (S02E18) - 7
I'm gonna send you back to hell where you belong.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 18 (S02E18) - 8
- Goodbye. - Ah, damn it.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 18 (S02E18) - 9
I only have to wear one goggle when I go swimming in my pool!
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 18 (S02E18) - 10
After my grandfather helped create one of our most beloved cartoon characters.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 18 (S02E18) - 11
Oh, you can all go to hell!
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Step into my office.
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What the hell are you talkin' about? I've lived there for 12 years.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 18 (S02E18) - 14
I'm not comin' back in a week, or ever!
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Oh. Hm.
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- And that makes us our own country. - What are you talking about?
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 18 (S02E18) - 17
A new foreign country which was founded this week, here in our own back yard.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 18 (S02E18) - 18
Thank you, Diane. So, Mrs Griffin, what's it like being the woman behind the man?
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 18 (S02E18) - 19
My son Chris is in charge of our space programme.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 18 (S02E18) - 20
So where is the president now?
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 18 (S02E18) - 21
I'd say "Oh, yeah! That's nice. That's the spot."
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Barkeep! Petro-nemo-slappy-wag.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 18 (S02E18) - 23
Peter, you can't drink that outside. You're gonna end up in jail.
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Uh-uh-uh! Can't touch me.
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Can't touch me
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It's Peter, go Peter, up Peter, yo, Peter, let's see Regis rap this way, can't touch me
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Man, this sucks. Hey, Podium Guy! Hey, I got a problem here.
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- Have a seat up front. - Well, that's more like it.
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- I don't shower. - Oh, that's what that is.
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Oh, yeah? Well, according to paragraph seven, sentence three, word eight
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- But this kind of behaviour can't be tolerated. - Agreed.
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Diane, I'm here at the Petorian front, where the US has cut off electricity,
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Damn pig-dog Americans, messin' with my family like this.
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No. We're a real country. We deserve all the rights and privileges everyone else gets.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 18 (S02E18) - 39
Oh. Yeah, sorry, Lois.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 18 (S02E18) - 40
- Fine. Why not just drop a bomb on him? - What about that, Eleanor?
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 18 (S02E18) - 41
Can anybody tell me what the square root of the hypotenuse is... Chris, is that a note?
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 18 (S02E18) - 42
Damn you, Rupert! Keep these loathsome insects away, or you'll end up like Mr Giraffe.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 18 (S02E18) - 43
Yes, and from the look of those sweater cows, so can you.
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No, no. No, no, this is fine.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 18 (S02E18) - 45
I'm sorry. Were you just whipping me? Or did I just get bit by a mosquito?
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 18 (S02E18) - 46
Iraq, Lois! You know what? I'm gonna invite a few of these fellas over for a party.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 18 (S02E18) - 47
- Just kidding. Is Muammar here? - Yeah, he's over there with Saddam.
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- Marco. - Polo!
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I say, I say, Achmed. What is that thing you people do
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I've had enough. You can keep this filthy mess you call a country. Come on, kids.
Aired 16 years ago - Jun 27, 2000

Due to Brian's embarrassing flea problem, the Griffin's move into a hotel while the house if fumigated. Lois and Peter soon discover that Chris has been skipping gym class because he's self-conscious about his body. Peter tries to talk Chris into getting liposuction, while Lois starts preparing him special low fat meals. Stewie starts taunting Chris by eating everything in sight, and starts packing on the baby fat. Even though Chris isn't up for surgery, Peter decides to go for it. The new, svelte Peter has Lois all hot and bothered. Peter loves the results of his lipo and decides to have some work done on his face. The new, handsome Peter starts getting all sorts of special treatment: at the gym, at the grocery store, even from total strangers. Lois doesn't like the new Peter's attitude, especially when he joins "The Beautiful People's Club." Karma catches up to Peter while he's on his way to the club. Unable to take his eyes off himself, Peter plunges his car over a cliff. The nasty fall - and subsequent crash-landing into a large vat of lard - leaves him horribly disfigured (ie: back to normal). MORE -LESS

Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 17 (S02E17) - 1
Oh, come on. He'll call back.
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Mom, there's fleas all over the house!
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We got a 602 at 31 Spooner Street!
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Yaaaagh!
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- They're in the carpet! - Got one over here!
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We pray.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 17 (S02E17) - 8
Well, you might wanna bring some cash, cos some places don't take credit cards.
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Oh, my. What a lovely room. Oh, and it's so clean.
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This is marvellous! I feel like a young Johnny Weissmuller!
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If I wanted to embarrass him, I'd do somethin' like this.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 17 (S02E17) - 13
- This is my son. - Oh. My apologies.
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I say, hello! You there! I'm ready to get out! Somebody!
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like your great-great-great-uncle Jabba the Griffin.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 17 (S02E17) - 16
Don't listen to your sister. Stickin' your finger down your throat doesn't make you throw up.
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Oh, yes! Yes!
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 17 (S02E17) - 19
- Hup! Hup! Hup! Hup! Hup! - Hup! Hup-hup! Hup! Hup!
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Agh!
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 17 (S02E17) - 21
Dad, this says I gained weight.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 17 (S02E17) - 22
I tell ya, he's been workin' out all week and he hasn't lost a pound.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 17 (S02E17) - 23
Well, Nell Carter used to be twice as big before Broderick got through with her.
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I'm like a Green Beret, you know. I sneak inside you and I skulk around
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and we have something very tasty for big fat you. Bon appétit!
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 17 (S02E17) - 27
Dad took me to a doctor to get the fat vacuumed out of my belly.
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Hello!
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Peter, you can't just suck 200Ibs of fat out of yourself. It's not natural.
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- Could you... could you help me do it, Brian? - Sure. I'd be honoured.
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I like Hillary Clinton, I don't care what anyone says. Argh!
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Meg, you're not gettin' plastic surgery.
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the great Eskimo actor Jennifer Love Hewitt.
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or your eyes are too close together, or your chest is flabby. You are who you are.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 17 (S02E17) - 36
Oh, this is crazy. You walk in here with your chiselled jaw and your...
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 17 (S02E17) - 37
You... you've really let this family down. We should be embracin' the things God gave us,
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 17 (S02E17) - 38
- There's a baby in that refuse bin. - Not too close, Barnaby.
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Warren Fredericks, Quahog Beautiful People's Club. Come on in front.
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Well, as a rule, I would say no, but OK, come in.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 17 (S02E17) - 41
Hey, when you're beautiful, doors magically open for you.
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Here's your introductory basket. It's got lotions, Ferrari sunglasses,
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I would, but my doctor advised me against heavy lifting.
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- Yeah. I think it looks better. - You pasted it over me.
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Seein' us all might give him somethin' to shoot for.
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- Lois! - What? Oh. Brian. I was...
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 17 (S02E17) - 48
But I've never been more attracted to him. Does that make me a bad person?
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Well, let me tell you somethin', buddy. If my son can't come in, then I'll just come in.
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Don't look at me! I'm hideous!
Aired 16 years ago - Jun 27, 2000

After the mob helps Peter with destroying his new beat up car, so he can get another new car, he must repay his debt to the mob by taking The Don's nephew, Big Fat Paulie, to the movies. Peter informs Paulie that they can't hang out anymore because of Lois, a misunderstanding that leads Paulie to believe that Peter wants Lois killed.

Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 16 (S02E16) - 1
I didn't think I'd make a good Gigi either, but, God help me, I was flattered.
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Ha! You're just mad about the car. Don't worry. I'll think of a way to fix it.
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- Aw, shut up, Cleveland. - Wanna talk about it, champ?
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Peter, you don't wanna get involved with the Mob.
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for the next 15 minutes?
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Look, Lois, we had a broken car, I did "something", and now we have a new car.
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- Anything! - Relax, Cleveland, there is no Mob.
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Peter, please don't underestimate them.
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Silence. Big Fat Paulie's in town this week to attend the wedding of my daughter.
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That's it? That's all I have to do? Ah, thank Go... Wait a second. Which movie?
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- Yeah, I'm Big Fat Paulie. - Hey. Guess I've got milk.
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- No, what time is it? - It's time for you to get your groove back.
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- Home? You know, for dinner. - Oh, yeah? What are we havin'?
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I am gettin' tired of you doin' everything without consultin' me. And...
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You know, like an adhesive. That's all he meant.
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Hi, I'm Bob Goen, and these are Mary Hart's legs.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 16 (S02E16) - 23
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- Now! - OK.
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This is my friend, Big Fat Paulie, and, uh... this is his big fat ass.
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Aw, jeez. It's not you, it's Lois. She doesn't want me hangin' around with ya.
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We make holes in teeth! We make holes in teeth!
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Whaddaya mean, you're gonna fire that hit man?
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- I sort of put a hit out on ya. - How could you put a hit on me?
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the chap who's been touting the merits of a United European Commonwealth?
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- I don't know what you're talking about. - Aw, come on, you know, the don.
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Boy, what a mismatched pair. A free spirit and a puppet.
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- All I got was this wedding invitation. - Wait a second, Peter.
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- Thank you, Peter. - Go ahead, try it on.
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Peter, I don't know how to explain it any clearer than that.
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Yes, because together we can do anything, face any foe, overcome any obstacle.
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- I'll be fine. All we have to do is blend in. - No problem.
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on this, the day of my daughter's wedding.
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- Let me handle this. - Peter, I thought we were a team.
Aired 16 years ago - Jun 13, 2000

Lois fears that Stewie needs to learn how to be social, so she sends him off to pre-school, where he falls in love with Janet, a girl who likes his cookies. Meanwhile, Lois becomes a flight attendant, and Peter takes advantage of the free flights.

Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 15 (S02E15) - 1
I got 'em! Ha-ha-ha! It's just like hunting.
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Oh, sweetheart, don't be upset. You're gonna have fun here.
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- Well... we could get hammered. - Oh, it's too early for me, but you go ahead.
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Maybe a part-time job would liven up your days.
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Nobody better come in here. I'm the Griffins' house.
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- Oh, now you've gone and upset the boy. - Peter, this is a new chapter in my life.
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Duck.
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So I'm, like, I got a job for you, baby... right here!
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So, what? You're just gonna dump me? Just like that?
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I didn't say anything. Go to sleep, crazy lady.
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Still, I find it odd that she's even on my mind at all. What the deuce has come over me?
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She's gone. Good. Well, I'm off.
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- He's putting his arm on my armrest. - It's my armrest.
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Stewardess, the plane just made my beer spill. I want a free one.
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So let it be known I want absolutely nothing to do with the wretched enterprise of love!
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No, no, actually, it's Stewie, but, well, you can call me Cookie if you like.
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Oh! Oh, you want my cookie? Oh, yes, by all means. Here you are.
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Argh! Unhand me, woman. I don't have gas, I'm in love!
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Agh! Agh! Agh! Agh! Oh, God! Oh, God! Agh! Agh! Agh!
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What? Lois, you can't quit. What if Kurt Cobain had quit?
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Well, I guess I'll give it a little more time. It's like I always tell the kids -
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Argh!
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Lois, we could use your help in coach.
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Would you like a crumpet? I would, because I'm Winston Churchill.
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Wait a second. You're tellin' me I flew all the way to Kentucky to get some fried chicken,
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- Peter! - Lois!
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Have you seen the lips on that woman? It's like a baboon's ass on her face!
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- Ugh! Move. I have a lot of work to do. - I can't, I'm stuck.
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Well, Lois, at least one of us is in the Mile High Club.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 15 (S02E15) - 41
Here's an artist's rendering of what they might look like.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 15 (S02E15) - 42
We would have sent you with the others, but we didn't know you were stuck in the toilet.
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Uh... uh... uh...
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We gotta get some fake passports on the black market.
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That is absolutely classic! Melinda, you're an utter delight.
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This is what you call dolled up? Why don't you save yourself years of sexual ambiguity
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I was lyin', but just so you know it's somethin' we might have to deal with.
Aired 16 years ago - Jun 06, 2000

A plane smuggling psychedelic toads from Columbia crashes in Quahog, and toad-licked becomes the new drug of choice in the Quahog high school. Peter infiltrates the high school undercover as a cool kid named Lando Griffin, and is successful in convincing all the kids to quit licking toads. Meg is trying to gain popularity so that a cool kid will ask her to the prom, and decides to go with Peter since he's established himself as an incredibly cool person. However, Peter can't help living out his own fantasies of being the coolest kid in school, and can't say no when the most popular girl in school asks him to the prom, so Peter ditches Meg. Peter and his date are chosen as king and queen of the prom, but Peter is suddenly feeling nothing but guilt. He tells the whole school that Meg broke his heart by dumping him, and makes it look like high school persona was killed after driving his motorcycle over a cliff. MORE -LESS

Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 14 (S02E14) - 1
Let's just pick up our plates and go eat in the hollow castle.
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Peter, may I? You're walking down a hallway. You take a left. You keep walking.
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- But I remember it so... - It was a dream!
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What's going on back here? Oh, hello, Megan. Wait, you're not part of the popular clique.
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Meg, haven't we taught you better than that?
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Oh, my God! I can't believe he did that!
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Oh, sweetheart, I'm sure all the boys wanna ask you to the dance.
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Uh, I was wonderin' if... if... if you'd, uh, d-do me the honour of, uh...
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 14 (S02E14) - 10
to get to the centre of a Rhode Island state prison?
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 14 (S02E14) - 11
I mean, if Meg's at risk, then so is Chris, and Stewie'll be in preschool before we know it.
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- The safety word is banana. - I love you.
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Dad? Dad?!
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I've gone undercover to get rid of the toad problem,
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Witch!
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Hey, does anybody have any drugs? I'm lookin' to score some drugs.
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- Oh, yeah? Watch this. - No!
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Holy crap, it's The Breakfast Club.
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Everyone's talking about how you trashed the jukebox. Classic cool.
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Of your bladder
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It'll mess you up
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You gotta give up the toad now
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Your whole life will hit the skids
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I'm no fool
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- God! You're such a wannabe loser. - Oh, yeah? If I'm such a loser,
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- Hey, Meg, wanna ditch and go to the mall? - Sure! See ya, Lando.
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I'm glad you taught those kids they don't have to do drugs to be popular.
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Wait a minute. Peter, you can't take Meg to a school dance.
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Aloha!
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that Lando is taking Connie Demico.
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Oliver Twit, if you ask me. I would have done things rather differently, I can tell you that.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 14 (S02E14) - 38
Go on! That's it.
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- Oh, yeah. - I want an explanation, mister.
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Oh, my God. I think he's right.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 14 (S02E14) - 41
I'm two years younger than you!
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 14 (S02E14) - 42
and I wouldn't recommend either one of 'em.
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- Thanks, Spider-Man. - Everybody gets one.
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Now, Meg, you know my feelings on tattoos.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 14 (S02E14) - 45
Sorry, pumpkin, we don't negotiate with kidnappers-family policy.
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Don't worry, I'll take good care of your kid. I got a daughter of my own, you know.
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I convinced Meg to go to the dance, so I'm gonna go drop her off.
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Lois, if you still haven't discovered I'm gone, please flip the tape over to side B.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 14 (S02E14) - 50
Nice moves, Lando.
Aired 16 years ago - May 30, 2000

When Brian offers to pick up Stewie from his Grandma and Grandpa's house, they miss their plane back and go on a cross-country journey back home. Meanwhile, Peter and Lois attempt to rekindle their relationship with some marriage videos.

Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 13 (S02E13) - 1
When I think of... of... of... of the times that that woman has...
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- Oh, Peter. I love you. - About a quarter past five.
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Wait here at the gate. I gotta run a quick errand.
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- You know, you're really pretty. - Oh, stop.
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I'm... I'm not drunk. I just have a speech impediment.
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Rupert! I told you to watch the bags!
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Hey!
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Oh, my God! All right, let's not dilly-dally.
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Oh, that's right. You have to punch in the numbers nowadays.
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Just give it a chance.
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Have fun!
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I hope you like big breasts
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- I wanna see the money. - You don't see the money till I see the stuff.
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That's it, Mr Giraffe, get all the marmalade...
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Dammit!
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Oh, my head. Oh, God. What are we doing here?
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And, well, it's kinda like a bat. I found it out back one day when I was raking.
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- What? - It doesn't show dirt.
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- You did it. - Put it back. I like that song.
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Nice, nice. Except that was James Spader in White Palace.
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- But I'll give him that kiss. - You suck!
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- Stewie and Brian are taking a train home. - Can we not discuss curtains for a second?
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- Peter, why are you so... - Get out! This is a part just for the men.
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You're lucky you're my brother too, or I'd kill you.
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All right. So instead of driving down this sun-parched highway, we've now got to walk.
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- I was the one who could talk. - Brian! Come on in!
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She was a good dog.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 13 (S02E13) - 34
you'd have a better life if she let you go.
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Mom!
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 13 (S02E13) - 36
You'd think those bulldogs would invite him to their card game.
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We're going to add...
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 13 (S02E13) - 40
- This is hot. - Turn around.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 13 (S02E13) - 41
You shoulda told me...
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She was sturdy, all four legs the same length...
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- I know this whole trip has been a mess. - Well, it hasn't been all bad.
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Just like Thelma and Louise
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 13 (S02E13) - 48
I'm with an intellectual
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- Crazy travel conditions. - First class and no class.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 13 (S02E13) - 50
Until we're syndicated, Fox will never let us die
Aired 16 years ago - Apr 25, 2000

Meg's slumber party is ruined by her family. She is sick of being embarrassed by them and secretly books the family on a talk show. Intrigued by their story, a network executive gets Peter to sign the family up to be on a reality show. Things quickly go awry, and the Griffins want out of the contract. However, the network owns their namesake, and the family is eventually replaced. MORE -LESS

Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 12 (S02E12) - 1
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They're giving your cue, Peter.
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- But, Dad... - Upstairs!
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 12 (S02E12) - 6
How could you embarrass me?! Nobody better pull this crap at my slumber party.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 12 (S02E12) - 7
Oh, we'd better stop by the hospital so I can get my cooties shot.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 12 (S02E12) - 8
Mom!
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 12 (S02E12) - 9
OK, I'd put Brad Pitt's face on Brendan Fraser's body
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 12 (S02E12) - 10
- Mom, what are you doing? - I love slumber parties.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 12 (S02E12) - 11
Oh, crap! I'm stuck in the stairs.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 12 (S02E12) - 12
- OK, let's go. - Oh, jeez. I'm sorry, Meg's friends.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 12 (S02E12) - 13
Well, then it's a good thing I have this.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 12 (S02E12) - 14
You ask me out to the box social or whatever the devil it is you children do these days.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 12 (S02E12) - 15
Oh! Oh! Oh!
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I wish there was some way I could make them understand how embarrassing they are.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 12 (S02E12) - 17
Well, actually, I'm not really a woman.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 12 (S02E12) - 18
To be honest with you, Diane, I'm surprised.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 12 (S02E12) - 19
Well, maybe some of them deserved it.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 12 (S02E12) - 20
- The Griffin family. - Suckers.
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Yeah, and you even manage to humiliate me there.
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Quiet, quiet, quiet. Shut up. Shut up.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 12 (S02E12) - 24
Peter, do you think there might be any validity to what Meg is feeling?
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 12 (S02E12) - 25
Hm.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 12 (S02E12) - 26
I look at you and I see a series. We would like to put cameras in your house
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 12 (S02E12) - 27
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If it makes her look half-human, it'll take six months off my face.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 12 (S02E12) - 30
The waist is still fine, you know... You can see it's still real stretchy.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 12 (S02E12) - 31
And a bad breakfast is the foundation of indigestion. Hey-oh!
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 12 (S02E12) - 32
Frankly, I like the yolks. I don't... I have no problem.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 12 (S02E12) - 33
"My God! Wouldn't it be marvellous if I turned out to be a homosexual?"
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 12 (S02E12) - 34
Wow! Joe, this sort of makes you like Larry from Three's Company.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 12 (S02E12) - 35
There's fresh seafood, good prices.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 12 (S02E12) - 36
- Meg, put your bib on. - I don't wanna wear a bib.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 12 (S02E12) - 37
Meg, you're the one that got us on TV in the first place.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 12 (S02E12) - 38
But everyone loves the rest of you. Lois, women 25 to 49 see you as a role model.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 12 (S02E12) - 39
- Oh, sorry I'm late, Mr... - Here.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 12 (S02E12) - 40
- Sorry. We have to keep this brief. - Why are we here?
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 12 (S02E12) - 41
"It spun in. There were no survivors."
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 12 (S02E12) - 42
We're gonna be late! Why won't you talk to me?!
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 12 (S02E12) - 43
Uh, when did he die?
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 12 (S02E12) - 44
who the hell decided tulips were so great?
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 12 (S02E12) - 45
but we usually have breakfast naked and I'm allowed to videotape it.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 12 (S02E12) - 46
You're the one with your hand up my backside.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 12 (S02E12) - 47
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Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 12 (S02E12) - 49
We don't get many of you molten-rock men in here.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 12 (S02E12) - 50
Me too. She's like that dorky Baldwin brother who isn't as good-Iooking or successful
Aired 16 years ago - Apr 18, 2000

Peter runs into a former classmate of his while at the amusement park that the classmate founded. Contemplating his own legacy, Peter starts to think about his future. Chris gives Peter a painting that he painted in order to cheer Peter up, but Peter ends up selling it to a New York art gallery for $5,000. Realizing that Chris might be his only hope to have a lasting legacy, Peter pushes Chris to follow his dream of becoming an artist. The family then moves to New York so Chris can become famous. MORE -LESS

Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 11 (S02E11) - 1
This is my rifle, this is my gun This is for fighting, this is for fun
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Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 11 (S02E11) - 3
Perhaps we should just continue the party at some other type of location.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 11 (S02E11) - 4
So we're not goin' just cos some little pissant tells us to. I demand to see the owner.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 11 (S02E11) - 5
I'm Neptune, god of the sea! I sink ships and conjure up storms!
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 11 (S02E11) - 6
Can't we just enjoy the rest of your birthday?
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 11 (S02E11) - 7
Then I got on Suddenly Susan, and that was, like, really cool.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 11 (S02E11) - 8
Don't be depressed, Dad. Here, I made you a present.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 11 (S02E11) - 9
Hup. I got a live one. Peter Griffin.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 11 (S02E11) - 10
Son, I'll put it someplace where everyone can see it.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 11 (S02E11) - 11
- I'll give you $5,000. What do you say? - I say...
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 11 (S02E11) - 12
Oh, oh, oh! He's only the biggest art dealer in New York!
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 11 (S02E11) - 13
Lois, our son has been blessed with a great gift,
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 11 (S02E11) - 14
They won't leave a bruise, and they'll let 'em know who's boss. There's no doubt about it.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 11 (S02E11) - 15
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Oh, come on! Those were really popular. They ran all the time.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 11 (S02E11) - 17
- There's a hot-dog cart! - Chris, don't spoil your appetite.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 11 (S02E11) - 18
Hey, waiter. The name's Peter Griffin.
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Screw the theatre. Mr Monatti invited us to a cocktail party so Chris can meet some artists.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 11 (S02E11) - 21
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Please, I invited you so that Chris could make an impression on the art community.
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Ah, the United Nations! Oh, I wish Chris could see this.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 11 (S02E11) - 25
Hm! Hidden missile silos behind the Great Wall.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 11 (S02E11) - 26
- And turn it into the toast of New York! - Ha, ha, ha! I love toast!
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 11 (S02E11) - 27
Even though she couldn't straighten out Bill.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 11 (S02E11) - 28
Hey, Murph. You can't blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah the Ayatollah.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 11 (S02E11) - 29
- Oh, there's Kate Moss. - Where? I don't see her.
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Wow! I can't wait to tell my dad.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 11 (S02E11) - 32
Your father is, uh... How can I say this without upsetting you?
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 11 (S02E11) - 33
- I mean, uh... I can't see you any more. - What are you talkin' about? You're my son.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 11 (S02E11) - 34
Damn, they musta put it in the wrong baby.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 11 (S02E11) - 35
"Dump"? Oh, so now you're too good for us, too?
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 11 (S02E11) - 36
I had a dream
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 11 (S02E11) - 37
No, you pretty much can't do a thing
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 11 (S02E11) - 38
You'll be known far and wide
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 11 (S02E11) - 39
But it's really for meee...
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 11 (S02E11) - 40
You'll love being famous, Meg, and this is the town to do it in.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 11 (S02E11) - 41
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- That's amazing! - Oh, thanks.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 11 (S02E11) - 43
- Uh... - You called me, right?
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 11 (S02E11) - 44
Oh, and people don't stare. You make me puke. Bitch.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 11 (S02E11) - 45
I don't know. You're the flavour of the month. Oops! Window open.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 11 (S02E11) - 46
- I'm gonna go over there and punch her. - No, no. No, no, no, no, no, no.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 11 (S02E11) - 47
Don't... don't you go to LaGuardia!
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 11 (S02E11) - 48
- I've never been to the Empire State Building. - Boy, we're a pair.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 11 (S02E11) - 49
Wait a second. I don't see any strippers passing out free tacos. Lois, you lied to me!
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 11 (S02E11) - 50
Aired 16 years ago - Apr 11, 2000

When Lois decides to run for the local school board, Peter runs against her in effort to get his favorite teacher reinstated. Peter and his supporters start a negative campaign against Lois, including a bunch of lies and even sexy pictures of her. Peter's mudslinging works and he is elected. Peter starts some strange policies, including armed robots taking over for hall monitors. The new policies backfire after Chris is caught bringing inappropriate magazines to school. Peter must then think of a way to get Lois back and regain his reputation with the town of Quahog. MORE -LESS

Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 10 (S02E10) - 1
l'm gonna drop off some campaign flyers in the teachers' lounge.
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Sorry to fly off the handle. Here, let me see that.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 10 (S02E10) - 4
Chris, your mother wants me and you to have a talk.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 10 (S02E10) - 5
But peeping can be dangerous, so l brought you this.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 10 (S02E10) - 6
All right, Dad!
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 10 (S02E10) - 7
Honey, of course l can.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 10 (S02E10) - 8
Hey, you guys. Lois, you running for School Board?
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 10 (S02E10) - 9
We now go Iive to Action News 5 Asian reporter, Trisha Takanawa,
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 10 (S02E10) - 10
...has just dismissed RandaII Fargas, ending his 32-year teaching career,
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 10 (S02E10) - 11
Great. You can get Mr. Fargas his job back.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 10 (S02E10) - 12
Lois, l can't let you deprive our children of a fine teacher like Mr. Fargas.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 10 (S02E10) - 13
l can be just as non-competitive as anybody.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 10 (S02E10) - 14
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...then l am gonna run like the Six Million Dollar Man.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 10 (S02E10) - 16
Look at me with my big ideas and my pointy nose,
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 10 (S02E10) - 17
See you on the campaign trail.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 10 (S02E10) - 18
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 10 (S02E10) - 19
Oh, my. Look where my hand is.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 10 (S02E10) - 20
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Yes, that's it. That's quite good. Yes, l miss my mommy.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 10 (S02E10) - 22
- Check it out! - Wow!
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 10 (S02E10) - 23
Peter, l'm concerned that your candidacy may have become a lost cause.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 10 (S02E10) - 24
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Tonight she takes on her greatest chaIIenge, Peter Griffin...
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 10 (S02E10) - 26
...on Monday Night Debate, y'aII!
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 10 (S02E10) - 27
She can burn in hell for all l care! Sure she can.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 10 (S02E10) - 28
"Her smiles, her frowns, her ups, her downs
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 10 (S02E10) - 29
"And yet, l've grown accustomed to her looks
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 10 (S02E10) - 30
Mr, Griffin, your opening statement, pIease,
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 10 (S02E10) - 31
What might be right for you, may not be right for some,
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 10 (S02E10) - 32
That's why, if I'm eIected, I promise to fight for competent teachers...
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 10 (S02E10) - 33
As a rich coIIege-bound student, I once joined some underpriviIeged youths...
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 10 (S02E10) - 34
I'm gonna take the highroad and stick to the issues,
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 10 (S02E10) - 35
Wait a second, bIow dryer, I'm not done yet,
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 10 (S02E10) - 36
...what kind of future wiII it be if you eIect a man who has never taught a student...
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 10 (S02E10) - 37
Peter! Come on! Stop, Shut up! You guys shut up!
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 10 (S02E10) - 38
Lois Griffin is a sIut, What?
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 10 (S02E10) - 39
But here's something everyone can understand!
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 10 (S02E10) - 40
...just some of the words used to describe Lois Griffin's prurient pic.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 10 (S02E10) - 41
I am so freaking wasted!
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 10 (S02E10) - 42
Just one! You!
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 10 (S02E10) - 43
lf you blow this chance to do something good for our kids...
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 10 (S02E10) - 44
This is Trisha Takanawa, here with School Board President Peter Griffin.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 10 (S02E10) - 45
"Vagina junction, what's your function?
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 10 (S02E10) - 46
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 10 (S02E10) - 47
l've never seen kids so enthusiastic about reading.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 10 (S02E10) - 48
Chris Griffin. He got it from his dad.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 10 (S02E10) - 49
...when prices were so low they were ridiculous.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 10 (S02E10) - 50
...is to claim that Lois gave your boy the pornography.
Aired 16 years ago - Apr 04, 2000

To get a favorite show back on the air, Peter convinces the “Make-a-Dream Come True” foundation that Chris is dying. The scam leads to Peter “magically healing” Chris and some people begin to worship him.

Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 9 (S02E09) - 1
I saw that on a two-part report on Dateline Tuesday and Dateline Gatilsday.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 9 (S02E09) - 2
If Chris gets his homework done, you can watch it together next week.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 9 (S02E09) - 3
- Mom, I'll do it after... - Chris finished his homework.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 9 (S02E09) - 4
Because if you were, I think you just lied to mom.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 9 (S02E09) - 5
If you're waiting for Gumbel 2 Gumbel, you're out of luck.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 9 (S02E09) - 6
I tried that once. It got me in a lot of trouble.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 9 (S02E09) - 7
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 9 (S02E09) - 8
Look at Mr. Suave.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 9 (S02E09) - 9
Use the door next to it.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 9 (S02E09) - 10
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- My son Chris is dying! - Holy crap, no! Oh, my God!
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 9 (S02E09) - 15
This whole thing was your idea!
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 9 (S02E09) - 16
All he wants is his favorite show back on TV. How can you say no?
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 9 (S02E09) - 17
Jeremy, is there anything lower than absolute zero?
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 9 (S02E09) - 18
Sounds sexy. What are the symptoms?
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 9 (S02E09) - 19
Why, that's the sickest boy I've ever seen!
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 9 (S02E09) - 20
We need to take a chance. Try something different. Something fresh.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 9 (S02E09) - 21
Excuse me.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 9 (S02E09) - 22
Are you kidding? I may see you again.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 9 (S02E09) - 23
I say, Mother, you have your work cut out for you now, don't you?
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 9 (S02E09) - 24
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I have a certificate to prove it.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 9 (S02E09) - 26
She heard that Chris is dying!
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 9 (S02E09) - 27
Chris was in on the whole thing.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 9 (S02E09) - 28
"as they dig your grave"
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 9 (S02E09) - 29
Junior, where you been?
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 9 (S02E09) - 30
Why is my name Florida?
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 9 (S02E09) - 31
Lois, that's ridiculous. There's nobody out there.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 9 (S02E09) - 32
No. Everything's fine. Thanks for checking. Bye-bye.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 9 (S02E09) - 33
Thank you.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 9 (S02E09) - 34
Chris is all better! I cured him!
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 9 (S02E09) - 35
What kind of man devalues the life of his child for a TV show?
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 9 (S02E09) - 36
You see what your lies have done? They think you're some kind of healer.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 9 (S02E09) - 37
Praise Peter!
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 9 (S02E09) - 38
Those films my cousin Rufus used to do were pure exploitation.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 9 (S02E09) - 39
Oh, you out of time, baby.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 9 (S02E09) - 40
We're talking Marty McSuperfly, dig?
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 9 (S02E09) - 41
Get me Isaac Hayes.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 9 (S02E09) - 42
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Lois, if you're scared, I'll hold you until the lights are on again.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 9 (S02E09) - 48
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 9 (S02E09) - 49
Don't you see what's happening?
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 9 (S02E09) - 50
Come on, there's a logical explanation for all those things.
Aired 16 years ago - Mar 28, 2000

Forced to go to a women’s retreat for telling sexist jokes at work, Peter resists the idea at first. After two weeks, however, Peter becomes a sensitive male. No one likes the new Peter, especially Lois. While attending a charity dinner, Lois does something that snaps Peter out of his feminine phase.

Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 8 (S02E08) - 1
and you won't not be not loving your time-share before you know it.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 8 (S02E08) - 2
It could even be a boat! You know how much we want one.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 8 (S02E08) - 3
It could even be a boat! You know how much we want one.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 8 (S02E08) - 4
- Joe, look to the right. It's the Griffins. - We're nautical now, baby.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 8 (S02E08) - 5
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Why are you upset? I never even knew you liked boats.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 8 (S02E08) - 7
- Could you pass me the oar, N-word Jim. - Thank you.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 8 (S02E08) - 8
I guess I'm just old-fashioned that way.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 8 (S02E08) - 9
Maybe you shouldn't do this. You've never had a lot of luck telling jokes.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 8 (S02E08) - 10
Don't worry. I... I got it under control.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 8 (S02E08) - 11
Ah! You like a little abuse, huh?
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 8 (S02E08) - 12
Hey, Lois. What do you call a woman who takes for ever to cook breakfast?
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 8 (S02E08) - 13
well, you wouldn't be cooking very fast at all, now, would you? That one wasn't very good.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 8 (S02E08) - 14
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- That's great! - That's a good one. That's what they're for!
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 8 (S02E08) - 16
So you got something to look at while you're talking to 'em. Ha-ha-ha-ha!
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 8 (S02E08) - 17
Oh, is she the one we video-taped taking a dump?
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 8 (S02E08) - 18
They are devices built by the Lord Jesus Christ for our entertainment.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 8 (S02E08) - 19
Irrational and emotionally fragile by nature, female co-workers are a peculiar animal.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 8 (S02E08) - 20
And, remember, nothing says "good job" like a firm, open-palm slap on the behind.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 8 (S02E08) - 21
You know, if I wasn't so sure you were a lesbian, I'd say you were coming on to me.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 8 (S02E08) - 22
Mr Hanson, you play the boss and we'll see what you've learned tonight.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 8 (S02E08) - 23
You're a valued member of our business team and I will give you a raise tomorrow
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 8 (S02E08) - 24
- Honk, honk. - OK, that's it!
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and get your nice shoes all ruined.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 8 (S02E08) - 26
You know I love you, but I have to admit there are times
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 8 (S02E08) - 27
This world would be far better if there were more men like him.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 8 (S02E08) - 28
If we can endure the pain of childbirth, imagine what else we're capable of.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 8 (S02E08) - 29
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But you are a beautiful person and I am here for you.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 8 (S02E08) - 31
Yeah. Oh, yeah. You like that, don't you?
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 8 (S02E08) - 32
- Jump! Trust us. We love you! - We'll catch you.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 8 (S02E08) - 33
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Chris, be a munchkin and bring my bags inside.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 8 (S02E08) - 35
I can't remember the last time we cuddled like this.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 8 (S02E08) - 36
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I just wanted to say hi. So what are you d...?
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 8 (S02E08) - 38
Peter, I'm sure you would have been a great mother if you'd had the chance.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 8 (S02E08) - 39
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- If you spent less time fixing your hair... - No, Lois. I'm late late!
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 8 (S02E08) - 42
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Fine. But this time if a boy calls, please don't tell him I'm wrist-deep in poopie.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 8 (S02E08) - 44
A lump. A lump! Oh, God! Oh, God!
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 8 (S02E08) - 45
Well, as you may have noticed, Peter's been acting a little different lately.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 8 (S02E08) - 46
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Of course that's why you're here.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 8 (S02E08) - 49
That's what this march is all about.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 8 (S02E08) - 50
It's your fault we have so much crime in this country
Aired 16 years ago - Mar 28, 2000

When Lois become the director of the Quahog Players production of “The King and I” Peter wants a part. He finds himself in the Producer’s Chair and starts to make some “artistic changes” to the script that involve scantily-clad women and cyborgs.

Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 7 (S02E07) - 1
I got great ideas, but they look at me, and all they see is a loser.
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I call it "Smith's Theory of Relativity."
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And Lois has her theater group.
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Part of being creative is figuring out what you're good at.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 7 (S02E07) - 5
"Oh, no not in springtime
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Mother, as first lady of the American stage, Helen Hayes, once said:
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 7 (S02E07) - 9
Then I tried sculpting.
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Wait, Peter, everyone has to audition. You know, sing, dance.
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"Met the greatest earthquake ever known
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Siamese baby? Stewie Griffin does not play bit parts!
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- Yeah. - Great, 'cause I could use some.
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The King of Siam? Why, that's the lead!
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You have too much talent for the stage.
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I'm the king of the...
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What am I supposed to do with all my great ideas?
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Don't you worry, Lois. I'll get the word out.
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Excuse me? You. Get out of here!
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...a Peter Griffin production, and I'm giving you the exclusive story.
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- Really? - Peter.
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But Loretta's playing Anna, and she's doing a great job.
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Today's weather calls for breezy skies and sun, and there's gonna be a...
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They did an all-you-people version of Hello, Dolly that was very successful.
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Besides, I'm the director.
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This is Rodgers and Hammerstein, not trash TV!
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Come on, Lois. Those hoop skirts make Diane look a little hippie, you know?
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No! He's not brilliant! Rodgers and Hammerstein were brilliant!
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I took this job because I wanted to create something beautiful...
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Good morning, Peter. I made your favorite breakfast.
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Look, the fact is the man is out there every bloody night with fresh material...
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Peter, you've never done a creative thing in your life!
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...is exactly what you've turned my show into.
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Remember, Diane, you're playing Anna, a steel-town girl on a Saturday night...
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We've been rehearsing for hours. I'm exhausted!
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- We can't do The King and I without Anna. - Yeah. This is a real snafu.
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I came because I love the theater.
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The city lies in ruins after the ninth nuclear World War.
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"Because I kicked all the bad guys in their jewels
Aired 16 years ago - Mar 21, 2000

When Peter tries to get out of paying a doctors bill by faking his own death, he is visited by Death himself, who wants to take Peter away. After Death twists his ankle while chasing Peter, everyone on Earth becomes immortal while death is incapacitated.

Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 6 (S02E06) - 1
Boy, I had so much fun playing with that.
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My nephew drew my portrait. It doesn't look a thing like me.
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Mr. Griffin, I'm saying you're fine.
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...all the little things in life, like you and the kids.
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Jeez, Lois. How long you been waiting to crack out that gem?
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It's bulletproof.
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I'm Calista Flockhart. Who the hell do you think I am? I'm Death.
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Why...
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Excuse me. Hello! I'm Stewie. Big fan.
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I don't care what that says! You can't take my husband!
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No, it would be a privilege. Oh, dear. Listen to me prattling on like a schoolgirl.
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Let's just say, when I was younger...
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A 20-minute call to Larchmont? Who do we know in Larchmont?
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Let's not do this. I caught Flo Jo. You don't think I can catch you?
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Here's some Tylenol. Great. Tylenol. I asked for Advil.
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It's okay, Death. You just worry about feeling better.
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I'm going out for a while. Wait.
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Now that I've been given another chance...
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- What the hell? - Okay.
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It's your turn, Death.
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What did you use for this cocoa, crap?
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Victory is mine!
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Yeah. But don't tell anyone. The consequences could be dire!
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Aren't you Richard Simmons' best friend, Richard Simmons?
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Actually, kid, I kind of fell into this gig. I really wanted to be a wood nymph.
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He's okay. He reminds me a lot of me at that age.
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I'm gonna be a virgin forever.
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Our own Asian reporter, Trisha Takanawa, filed this report, all by herself!
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This is all your fault. And there's only one solution.
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Death, there is no way Peter can do your job.
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But thanks for letting me draw you naked.
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Too huge. But you're thinking. I like that.
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Your Q-rating's through the roof.
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Are those kids on board? Yeah.
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Pilot error. Big mess. Everybody dies.
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If you look out the window, you'll see the San Fernando Valley...
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 6 (S02E06) - 50
Aired 16 years ago - Mar 14, 2000

When Spooner Street ends up winning the float contest in the Harvest Day parade, a street-wide war breaks out over custody of the trophy. Meanwhile, to raise big money for a new Prada handbag, Meg gets a job at a pancake house, where she pretends that Stewie is her illegitimate crack addicted baby. Child services investigates and soon finds the Griffin home unsuitable for a baby, and take Stewie to a foster home. The residents of Spooner Street declare peace, and decide to rescue Stewie. MORE -LESS

Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 5 (S02E05) - 1
You're the boss because you never give up, like with the ladies.
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Like when we play pool, you take so long to line up your shots...
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Go, Spooner Street!
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You know what's really amazing?
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 5 (S02E05) - 5
Mother teaches piano. I suppose I could as well.
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Are you as excited as I am, Tom?
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 5 (S02E05) - 8
That's not Angela. That's Mona, Angela's mom.
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He said I, too, was the boss. And it's time Cleveland got his due.
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No. Wait a minute, this is crazy.
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Car!
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Yes! These are delectable.
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Clear the way! I'm a cop!
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- Maybe it fell. - Yeah. Right into someone's pocket.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 5 (S02E05) - 18
...last Fourth of July. That's against the law, Officer!
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Where are you going, Serling? Want some of this?
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 5 (S02E05) - 22
- We played Pictionary with them! - Bastards!
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To be honest, Peter, we were all a little surprised you invited us over.
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Oh, my God! We were robbed!
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- Cleveland. - Joe.
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The real challenge is having a baby that's addicted to crack.
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Freeze! Dad?
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Daddy, we got one!
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A bunch of card-carrying Commies if you ask me!
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Probably out scoring more rock.
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Honey, would you like some pancakes?
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 5 (S02E05) - 37
She said we fed him dog food!
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She's 16, Peter.
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Yes, Chris. This is where babies come from.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 5 (S02E05) - 41
I never was any good at dealing with the authorities.
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You people understand every language except English!
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 5 (S02E05) - 43
Stewie, come complete our rainbow!
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We didn't know who she was! It's not our fault!
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- Now we have a real problem to deal with. - That's right!
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He must still be working the junk out of his system.
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Or perhaps she can learn after her people invade your country.
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So now you all understand, yes? You all hate each other?
Aired 16 years ago - Mar 07, 2000

Lois suspects Stewie is the one creating all the pee stains around the house, so she decides to potty-train him. When an incident in the supermarket reveals that Brian is the one responsible, he goes to see a therapist. Brian finds out that his love of Lois is causing his accidents, so he decides to confront her.

Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 4 (S02E04) - 1
Please, for your family, take it off.
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How dare you sully my good name by spreading slanderous filth!
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- Not the... - Outrages, yeah. I think we got it.
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Bond?
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- Brian, is that you? - Uh, yeah, it's me.
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Join us tomorrow for more "Price is Right".
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 4 (S02E04) - 8
It looks like someone already tried to clean it up.
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- Huh. See, we're Catholic, so... - Then you want You're a Naughty Child
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 4 (S02E04) - 10
They are. I'm washing them with some fabric softener.
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I was so proud.
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Maybe you don't have to pee. I oughta just give you some beer. Goes right through you.
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Peter, I don't care what the other men are getting. You're only getting one.
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I say, I say! Paco, grab a mop. Will somebody get Patches the hell out of here
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OK, look, so maybe this isn't where I thought I was gonna be at seven years old.
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Man, didn't see that coming.
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Oh. What about him? He's gotta be in his fifties.
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Would that be OK?
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Ten years married and still in love. What's their secret?
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 4 (S02E04) - 24
Like most other people, I used to think therapy was only for crazies and nut jobs.
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Whoa, hang on. I gave you one of the ones with silverware in it.
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Oh.
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Well, goodbye, Dr Kaplan. And thank you.
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I swear, I don't even remember doing it. I don't understand this.
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Oh, oh, and how embarrassed was I when the word "crate" came up!
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Enough, Batman. I don't...
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Oh, I'm using my special cat power to get Batman all wet.
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- All that running water. That's gotta be it! - Mm-hm.
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- Come on, she's my best friend's wife. - Mm-hm.
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So what the hell, Brian? You cured yet?
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 4 (S02E04) - 39
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And to this day I still lay awake at night wondering about the soup that got away.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 4 (S02E04) - 41
- Hey, you, the news is on. - Where is everybody?
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 4 (S02E04) - 42
And now Part 3 of Asian correspondent Tricia Takanawa's special report on sex.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 4 (S02E04) - 43
and he's in the bathroom right now, possibly doing drugs.
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- Your tail keeps hitting me. - If it's bothering you, I can stop.
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Smooth.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 4 (S02E04) - 46
- You shut up. - You love her.
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I was, like, "I'll go to the mall." Then Amber wasn't gonna go.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 4 (S02E04) - 48
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and the uncommon, sometimes haunting, glow of sensuality that surrounds you.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 4 (S02E04) - 50
Well, let me give my big boy a kiss.
Aired 17 years ago - Dec 26, 1999

Peter, who is concerned that the world is about to end becase of Y2K, convinces the family into canceling all their New Year's Eve plans. After bombs destroy everything, the Griffins set off to a Twinkie factory in Natick.

Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 3 (S02E03) - 1
- Annihilating the entire planet. - No!
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a balloon tied to a mailbox is the international symbol for "party over here!"
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There's a benefit gala at the Boston Pops tonight, and...
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Peter, you've been down there all day. I hope they're already...
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 3 (S02E03) - 7
OK, OK. You know that one Christmas present you really wanted, but didn't get?
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 3 (S02E03) - 8
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- And I could be getting felt up by Kevin. - Now don't you give it all away up front.
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Quahog's fabled alabaster clam is about to descend and usher in a new millennium.
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Actually, each light represents a missile launching by itself.
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- Can we please just drop it? - It's just not fair.
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Quagland? Oh, you must be dreamin'.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 3 (S02E03) - 17
Well, we just finished off what was left in the kitchen.
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Thank goodness Peter bought a huge supply of dehydrated meals before the blast.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 3 (S02E03) - 19
Well, so much for finding food at the Stop 'N Shop.
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Delicious, Tom. I guess we should be eating her with chopsticks.
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Lois, it'll just be another mouth to feed. I'll take care of Woody, son.
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- Twinkees? - Yeah, I saw a story about 'em on A&E.
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We gotta get to that factory and we'll have all the food we need.
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I am Jorad. I and my band of highway warriors control this territory.
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Well, howdy, strangers. You look plumb tuckered.
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She's right. Besides, this place is paradise.
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She's gonna breathe on it first
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Takes a long, hard look at Randy
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 3 (S02E03) - 33
Left...
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Who knows what animals have been in there?
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 3 (S02E03) - 36
Should've sent a poet.
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and we can build a community just like the one we had.
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- Guess who? - Stop it, Chris.
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Excuse me, Mr Mayor. We have an outsider who wishes to join our community.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 3 (S02E03) - 42
Ah, village idiot. That's a good one.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 3 (S02E03) - 43
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it looked like Audrey Hepburn not only didn't have breakfast at Tiffany's,
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- Guys, we need to make some guns. - Guns? Guns only lead to trouble.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 3 (S02E03) - 46
Honey, Mommy's making you some new feetie pyjamas.
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I'll have your father flood the basement, so you can get more exercise.
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Attention, New Quahogians.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 3 (S02E03) - 49
We don't need guns. We need food and water.
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Don't be stupid. She speak good and everything.
Aired 17 years ago - Sep 30, 1999

Peter's very religious father comes to live with the family after he is forced to retire from his lifelong job at the Mill.

Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 2 (S02E02) - 1
Bless her heart. She's on another one of her prayer missions in Las Vegas.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 2 (S02E02) - 2
I'm in the car.
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Maybe you'll just go to purgatory with all the unbaptized babies.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 2 (S02E02) - 4
"...where their flesh burned in agony forever and ever."
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A pestilence here and a plague there. Omnipotence!
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 2 (S02E02) - 7
Open this door! Open it, I say!
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 2 (S02E02) - 8
God's watching me do number two?
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 2 (S02E02) - 9
Grandpa, we were just holding hands.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 2 (S02E02) - 10
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...and God kills her for parading her bum around in those pants!
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 2 (S02E02) - 12
Why does that man drop his club before he runs around?
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 2 (S02E02) - 13
I'll get him.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 2 (S02E02) - 14
He just left without saying anything? Where would he go?
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 2 (S02E02) - 15
The Rhode Island Cock Society is sponsoring free check-ups...
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 2 (S02E02) - 16
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 2 (S02E02) - 17
It seems he broke into the old mill after hours.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 2 (S02E02) - 18
I, for one, am a tumbler. Here, watch my round-off.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 2 (S02E02) - 19
...but it doesn't seem like your dad is interested in bonding with you.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 2 (S02E02) - 20
That's my boy. At least, that's what your mama always told me.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 2 (S02E02) - 21
Cut it out. I'm serious.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 2 (S02E02) - 22
...and stick a tiny pack of smokes in his torn denim jacket.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 2 (S02E02) - 23
Oh, yeah. But he's in great shape. Except his prostate.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 2 (S02E02) - 24
Because this man always put his job before everything else.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 2 (S02E02) - 25
Peter, this is truly a miracle. I'm so grateful.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 2 (S02E02) - 26
Lions eating Christians, people nailing each other to two-by-fours.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 2 (S02E02) - 27
A chapel? Where will you all eat lunch?
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 2 (S02E02) - 28
Your dad stinks.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 2 (S02E02) - 29
Boo-yah!
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 2 (S02E02) - 30
Now wait a minute. I may not be perfect.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 2 (S02E02) - 31
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Something's wrong with your shower. The water's not cold enough.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 2 (S02E02) - 33
How can you just sit there and let him talk like that?
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 2 (S02E02) - 34
I killed a hooker. She made a crack about me being faster than a speeding bullet...
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 2 (S02E02) - 35
...a loving father, and, for some reason I'll never understand...
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 2 (S02E02) - 36
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Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 2 (S02E02) - 38
Hey, did you ever notice this? On page 375, it says "Jebus."
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 2 (S02E02) - 39
...with a family crisis only His Holiness can resolve.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 2 (S02E02) - 40
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Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 2 (S02E02) - 42
Wave at the Pope there, Luke.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 2 (S02E02) - 43
Lemony.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 2 (S02E02) - 44
Come on. What about the time I was on that airplane?
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 2 (S02E02) - 45
Peter, you've raised a fine family.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 2 (S02E02) - 46
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 2 (S02E02) - 47
And Chris, what you do in the bathroom is between you and God.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 2 (S02E02) - 48
I meant you should talk to your father.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 2 (S02E02) - 49
...and it turned out to be his son? I think this is gonna top it.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 2 (S02E02) - 50
His zest for life is an affirmation of God's great love within us all.
Aired 17 years ago - Sep 23, 1999

Lois' Aunt dies and leaves her the Cherrywood Mansion. The family moves in to the new mansion in Newport only to lose their fortune after Peter makes an extravagant purchase at a charity auction.

Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 1 (S02E01) - 1
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 1 (S02E01) - 2
Before she passed, your aunt recorded a message for you.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 1 (S02E01) - 3
Lois, you were always my favorite niece.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 1 (S02E01) - 4
Cherrywood? That's so generous of Aunt Marguerite.
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Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 1 (S02E01) - 7
"We'll do the best we can with Meg"
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 1 (S02E01) - 8
"My God, this house is freakin' sweet
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 1 (S02E01) - 9
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 1 (S02E01) - 10
"we'll gladly be your bitch
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 1 (S02E01) - 11
No, Lois.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 1 (S02E01) - 12
Whoops.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 1 (S02E01) - 13
Peter, how could you sell our house in Quahog without even asking me?
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 1 (S02E01) - 14
But I love our old house. You have to buy it back.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 1 (S02E01) - 15
Please, Mom. Look, there's a pool.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 1 (S02E01) - 16
Across the hall from the library we have the billiard room.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 1 (S02E01) - 17
All right, Mom!
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 1 (S02E01) - 18
So the guy takes the dog into the vet.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 1 (S02E01) - 19
I got a million of them.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 1 (S02E01) - 20
Lois' friend "yacht boy" and his lovely wife "Caca" invited us to some...
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 1 (S02E01) - 21
It's a pleasure to see you again.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 1 (S02E01) - 22
To tell you the truth, we're all a little uncomfortable being waited on.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 1 (S02E01) - 23
Filled with beautiful people. And I'm gonna bag me a rich one.
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Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 1 (S02E01) - 27
I beg to differ.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 1 (S02E01) - 28
Okay, Peter, I was hoping I wouldn't have to resort to shock therapy...
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 1 (S02E01) - 29
...you sit around the magnificently appointed Tuscan villa.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 1 (S02E01) - 30
And the Oscar goes to Marisa Tomei!
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 1 (S02E01) - 31
Maybe he's fitting in so well, we can't tell him from the other bluebloods.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 1 (S02E01) - 32
Good day.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 1 (S02E01) - 33
Peter, you're simply enchanting.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 1 (S02E01) - 34
So, I guess, technically, that makes you available.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 1 (S02E01) - 35
What a marvelous vessel.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 1 (S02E01) - 36
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 1 (S02E01) - 37
To Mr. Peter Griffin for an astonishing $100 million!
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 1 (S02E01) - 38
Do you collect objets d'art?
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 1 (S02E01) - 39
Of course I do, my dear.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 1 (S02E01) - 40
I'm going home. Where's Brian?
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 1 (S02E01) - 41
No, you shut up. You're the one talking.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 1 (S02E01) - 42
Now I remember why I left Newport!
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 1 (S02E01) - 43
Asia's market has nowhere to go but up!
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 1 (S02E01) - 44
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 1 (S02E01) - 45
You're not a Newport millionaire. I created you.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 1 (S02E01) - 46
A Mr. Brandywine from the Historical Society is at the front gate.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 1 (S02E01) - 47
Good game, Mean Joe. You want some of my Coke?
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 1 (S02E01) - 48
I could give him the house and call it even.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 1 (S02E01) - 49
Yeah. He's Jesus. He can do anything. And look over here.
Recap of Family Guy Season 2 Episode 1 (S02E01) - 50
I happen to know that nothing of historical significance ever occurred here.